["Smoothly written _vers de Société_, where a _boudoir_
decorum is, or ought always to be, preserved; where sentiment
never surges into passion, and where humour never overflows
into boisterous merriment."--_Frederick Locker's Preface to
"Lyra Elegantiarum."_]
[Illustration]
Dear Lyre, your duty now you know!
If one would sing with grace and glow
Songs of Society,
One must not dream of fire, or length,
Or vivid touch, or virile strength,
Or great variety.
Among the Muses of Mayfair
A Bacchanal with unbound hair,
And loosened girdle,
Would be as purely out of place
As Atalanta in a race
O'er hedge or hurdle:
Our Muse, dear Lyra, must be trim,
Must not indulge in vagrant whim,
Of voice or vesture.
Boudoir decorum will allow
No gleaming eye, no glowing brow,
No ardent gesture.
Society, which is our theme,
Is like a well-conducted stream
Which calmly ripples.
We sing the World where no one feels
Too pungently, or hates, or steals,
Or loves, or tipples.
And should you hint that down below
The subtle siren all men know
Is hiding _her_ face,
Our answer is: "That may be true,
But boudoir bards have nought to do
Save with the surface."
And therefore, though Society feel
The Proletariat's heavy heel
Its kibe approaching,
Some luxuries yet are left to sing,
The Opera-Box, the Row, the Ring,
And Golf, and Coaching.
Not e'en the Socialistic scare
The dandyish and the debonair
Has quite demolished;
Whilst Privilege hath still a purse,
There's yet a chance for flowing verse,
And periods polished.
If IBSEN, BELLAMY, and GEORGE,
Raise not the boudoir critic's gorge
Beyond all bearing,
Light lyrics may she not endure,
On social ills above her cure,
Below her caring?
Muse, with Society we may toy
Without impassioned grief or joy,
Or boisterous merriment;
May sing of Sorrow with a smile;
At least, it may be worth our while
To try the experiment.
* * * * *
QUITE THE TREBLE GLOUCESTER CHEESE!--The Three Quires' Festival this
week. Do the Three Quires appear in the Cathedral? If so, as each
quire means twenty-four sheets, there'll he quite a "Surplice Stock."
* * * * *
CONTRIBUTION BY OUR OWN "MULEY HASSAN."--_Puzzle_--To find "three
Single Gentlemen rolled into one?" _Answer_--Sir EUAN SMITH.
_Explanation_--Sir, You, an' SMITH. [_Exit_ MULEY HASSAN _going to
Bray._
* * * * *
Why ought a Quack's attendance on a patient to be gratis?--Because he
is No-Fee-sician.
* * * * *
[Illustration: "LA-BOUCHE-RE(-NARD) ET LES RAISINS."]
* * * * *
[Illustration: A MERE PREJUDICE.
_Tourist._ "I SEE YOU EMPLOY A GOOD MANY WOMEN ABOUT HERE, FARMER."
_Farmer._ "HAVE TO DO, HARVEST-TIME, SIR; BUT FOR MYSELF I MUCH PREFER
MANUAL LABOUR!"]
* * * * *