"Sometimes," said the Red Knight, "a situation arises where mere words
will not do at all. Look at this paper, for instance."
"It's a telegram, isn't it?" said Alice.
"A special night-letter," said the Red Knight. "It's from the Prime
Minister of Kansas. It says: 'When you take a third cup at breakfast, do
you drink coffee like the plain people, or cocoa like the enemies of
progress?' Now, words alone could not express my views on the subject.
The only way I can answer this highly important question is like this."
And then, to Alice's astonishment, the Red Knight descended from his
horse and stood straight in the air on his hands, as Alice had
frequently seen her little brother do in the back yard at home.
"On the one hand," said the Red Knight, lifting his right arm from the
ground and tipping dangerously to the left. "I believe that the right of
the common people to drink coffee in the morning is inalienable, and if
the Constitution is in the way it should be recalled. On the other
hand," suiting his action to the word and tipping dangerously to the
right, "if some people are put upon a cocoa diet by doctor's orders,
they should be at liberty to drink cocoa even if they are rich. I
think," concluded the Red Knight as he got to his feet quite breathless
and very red in the face, "that the Prime Minister of Kansas will
henceforth know how I stand upon the subject."
"I didn't know you were so clever at gymnastics," said Alice with
sincere admiration.
"Oh, I am," said the Red Knight, with an air of justified pride. "I am
the only one in the country who can sit between two stools without
touching either or falling to the ground."
"I don't see how anybody can do that," said Alice.
"I do it by sitting on my record," said the Red Knight.