_Customer (indignantly)._ Hi! waiter, what do you call this soup?
_Waiter (meekly)._ I not know, sir, but ze padrone tell me to describe
'im cocks-tail!
* * * * *
"THE COMING MAN."--A waiter.
* * * * *
[Illustration: SO VERY CONSCIENTIOUS!--_Master of the House._ "Why,
Jenkins, what on earth is the matter with you? Aren't you ashamed of
yourself?"
_Butler (with great deliberation)_, "Well, shir--if you pleashe,
shir--itsh not quite _my_ fault. You told me to taste every bottle of
wine before dinner, in cashe one should be corked. I've only carried out
in-shtrucshuns."]
* * * * *