woman, entering the Harim of the Police-Master, said to his wife,
“Verily the Wali bought of me five slaves for one thousand ducats and
two hundred for myself, saying:—Bring them to my quarters. So I have
brought them.” Hearing the old woman’s story she believed it and asked
her, “Where are the slaves?” Dalilah replied, “O my lady, they are
asleep under the palace window”; whereupon the dame looked out and
seeing the Moorish barber clad in a Mameluke habit and the young
merchant as he were a drunken Mameluke[204] and the Jew and the dyer and
the ass-driver as they were shaven Mamelukes, said in herself, “Each of
these white slaves is worth more than a thousand dinars.” So she opened
her chest and gave the old woman the thousand ducats, saying, “Fare thee
forth now and come back anon; when my husband waketh, I will get thee
the other two hundred dinars from him.” Answered the old woman, “O my
lady, an hundred of them are thine, under the sherbet-gugglet whereof
thou drinkest,[205] and the other hundred do thou keep for me against I
come back,” presently adding, “Now let me out by the private door.” So
she let her out, and the Protector protected her and she made her way
home to her daughter, to whom she related how she had gotten a thousand
gold pieces and sold her five pursuers into slavery, ending with, “O my
daughter, the one who troubleth me most is the ass-driver, for he
knoweth me.” Said Zaynab, “O my mother, abide quiet awhile and let what
thou hast done suffice thee, for the crock shall not always escape the
shock.” When the Chief of Police awoke, his wife said to him, “I give
thee joy of the five slaves thou hast bought of the old woman.” Asked
he, “What slaves?” And she answered, “Why dost thou deny it to me? Allah
willing, they shall become like thee people of condition.” Quoth he, “As
my head liveth, I have bought no slaves! Who saith this?” Quoth she,
“The old woman, the brokeress, from whom thou boughtest them; and thou
didst promise her a thousand dinars for them and two hundred for
herself.” Cried he, “Didst thou give her the money?” And she replied,
“Yes; for I saw the slaves with my own eyes, and on each is a suit of
clothes worth a thousand dinars; so I sent out to bid the sergeants have
an eye to them.” The Wali went out and, seeing the five plaintiffs, said
to the officers, “Where are the five slaves we bought for a thousand
dinars of the old woman?” Said they, “There are no slaves here; only
these five men, who found the old woman, and seized her and brought her
hither. We fell asleep, whilst waiting for thee, and she stole away and
entered the Harim. Presently out came a maid and asked us:—Are the five
with you with whom the old woman came?”; and we answered, “Yes.” Cried
the Master of Police, “By Allah, this is the biggest of swindles!”; and
the five men said, “We look to thee for our goods.” Quoth the Wali, “The
old woman, your mistress, sold you to me for a thousand gold pieces.”
Quoth they, “That were not allowed of Allah; we are free-born men and
may not be sold, and we appeal from thee to the Caliph.” Rejoined the
Master of Police, “None showed her the way to the house save you, and I
will sell you to the galleys for two hundred dinars apiece.” Just then,
behold, up came the Emir Hasan Sharr al-Tarik who, on his return from
his journey had found his wife stripped of her clothes and jewellery and
heard from her all that had passed; whereupon quoth he, “The Master of
Police shall answer me this” and repairing to him, said, “Dost thou
suffer old women to go round about the town and cozen folk of their
goods? This is thy duty and I look to thee for my wife’s property.” Then
said he to the five men, “What is the case with you?” So they told him
their stories and he said, “Ye are wronged men,” and turning to the
Master of Police, asked him, “Why dost thou arrest them?” Answered he,
“None brought the old wretch to my house save these five, so that she
took a thousand dinars of my money and sold them to my women.” Whereupon
the five cried, “O Emir Hasan, be thou our advocate in this cause.” Then
said the Master of Police to the Emir, “Thy wife’s goods are at my
charge and I will be surety for the old woman. But which of you knoweth
her?” They cried, “We all know her: send ten apparitors with us, and we
will take her.” So he gave them ten men, and the ass-driver said to
them, “Follow me, for I should know her with blue eyes.”[206] Then they
fared forth and lo! they meet old Dalilah coming out of a by-street: so
they at once laid hands on her and brought her to the office of the Wali
who asked her, “Where are the people’s goods?” But she answered, saying,
“I have neither gotten them nor seen them.” Then he cried to the gaoler,
“Take her with thee and clap her in gaol till the morning;” but he
replied, “I will not take her nor will I imprison her lest she play a
trick on me and I be answerable for her.” So the Master of Police
mounted and rode out with Dalilah and the rest to the bank of the
Tigris, where he bade the lamp-lighter crucify her by her hair. He drew
her up by the pulley and bound her on the cross; after which the Master
of Police set ten men to guard her and went home. Presently, the night
fell down and sleep overcame the watchmen. Now a certain Badawi had
heard one man say to a friend, “Praise be to Allah for thy safe return!
Where hast thou been all this time?” Replied the other, “In Baghdad
where I broke my fast on honey-fritters.”[207] Quoth the Badawi to
himself, “Needs must I go to Baghdad and eat honey-fritters therein”;
for in all his life he had never entered Baghdad nor seen fritters of
the sort. So he mounted his stallion and rode on towards Baghdad, saying
in his mind, “’Tis a fine thing to eat honey-fritters! On the honour of
an Arab, I will break my fast with honey-fritters and naught else!”——And
Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Sixth Night,
She pursued, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the wild Arab
mounted horse and made for Baghdad saying in his mind, “’Tis a fine
thing to eat honey-fritters! On the honour of an Arab I will break my
fast with honey-fritters and naught else;” and he rode on till he came
to the place where Dalilah was crucified and she heard him mutter these
words. So he went up to her and said to her, “What art thou?” Quoth she,
“I throw myself on thy protection, O Shaykh of the Arabs!” and quoth he,
“Allah indeed protect thee! But what is the cause of thy crucifixion?”
Said she, “I have an enemy, an oilman, who frieth fritters, and I
stopped to buy some of him, when I chanced to spit and my spittle fell
on the fritters. So he complained of me to the Governor, who commanded
to crucify me, saying:—I adjudge that ye take ten pounds of
honey-fritters and feed her therewith upon the cross. If she eat them,
let her go, but if not, leave her hanging. And my stomach will not brook
sweet things.” Cried the Badawi, “By the honour of the Arabs, I departed
not the camp but that I might taste of honey-fritters! I will eat them
for thee.” Quoth she, “None may eat them, except he be hung up in my
place.” So he fell into the trap and unbound her; whereupon she bound
him in her stead, after she had stripped him of his clothes and turband
and put them on; then covering herself with his burnous and mounting his
horse, she rode to her house, where Zaynab asked her, “What meaneth this
plight?”; and she answered, “They crucified me;” and told her all that
had befallen her with the Badawi. This is how it fared with her; but as
regards the watchmen, the first who woke roused his companions and they
saw that the day had broken. So one of them raised his eyes and cried,
“Dalilah.” Replied the Badawi, “By Allah! I have not eaten all night.
Have ye brought the honey-fritters?” All exclaimed, “This is a man and a
Badawi,” and one of them asked him, “O Badawi, where is Dalilah and who
loosed her?” He answered, “’Twas I; she shall not eat the honey-fritters
against her will; for her soul abhorreth them.” So they knew that the
Arab was ignorant of her case, whom she had cozened, and said to one
another, “Shall we flee or abide the accomplishment of that which Allah
hath written for us?” As they were talking, up came the Chief of Police,
with all the folk whom the old woman had cheated, and said to the
guards, “Arise, loose Dalilah.” Quoth the Badawi, “We have not eaten
to-night. Hast thou brought the honey-fritters?” Whereupon the Wali
raised his eyes to the cross and seeing the Badawi hung up in the stead
of the old woman, said to the watchmen, “What is this?” “Pardon, O our
lord!” “Tell me what hath happened.” “We were weary with watching with
thee on guard and said:—Dalilah is crucified. So we fell asleep, and
when we awoke, we found the Badawi hung up in her room; and we are at
thy mercy.” “O folk, Allah’s pardon be upon you! She is indeed a clever
cheat!” Then they unbound the Badawi, who laid hold of the Master of
Police, saying, “Allah succour the Caliph against thee! I look to none
but thee for my horse and clothes!” So the Wali questioned him and he
told him what had passed between Dalilah and himself. The magistrate
marvelled and asked him, “Why didst thou release her?”; and the Badawi
answered, “I knew not that she was a felon.” Then said the others, “O
Chief of Police, we look to thee in the matter of our goods; for we
delivered the old woman into thy hands and she was in thy guard; and we
cite thee before the Divan of the Caliph.” Now the Emir Hasan had gone
up to the Divan, when in came the Wali with the Badawi and the five
others, saying, “Verily, we are wronged men!” “Who hath wronged you?”
asked the Caliph; so each came forward in turn and told his story, after
which said the Master of Police, “O Commander of the Faithful, the old
woman cheated me also and sold me these five men as slaves for a
thousand dinars, albeit they are free-born.” Quoth the Prince of True
Believers, “I take upon myself all that you have lost”; adding to the
Master of Police, “I charge thee with the old woman.” But he shook his
collar, saying, “O Commander of the Faithful, I will not answer for her;
for, after I had hung her on the cross, she tricked this Badawi and,
when he loosed her, she tied him up in her room and made off with his
clothes and horse.” Quoth the Caliph, “Whom but thee shall I charge with
her?”; and quoth the Wali, “Charge Ahmad al-Danaf, for he hath a
thousand dinars a month and one-and-forty followers, at a monthly wage
of an hundred dinars each.” So the Caliph said, “Harkye, Captain Ahmad!”
“At thy service, O Commander of the Faithful,” said he; and the Caliph
cried, “I charge thee to bring the old woman before us.” Replied Ahmad,
“I will answer for her.” Then the Caliph kept the Badawi and the five
with him,——And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her
permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Seventh Night,
She resumed, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the Caliph
said to Calamity Ahmad, “I charge thee to bring the old woman before
us,” he said, “I will answer for her, O Commander of the Faithful!” Then
the Caliph kept the Badawi and the five with him, whilst Ahmad and his
men went down to their hall,[208] saying to one another, “How shall we
lay hands on her, seeing that there are many old women in the town?” And
quoth Ahmad to Hasan Shuman, “What counsellest thou?” Whereupon quoth
one of them, by name Ali Kitf al-Jamal,[209] to al-Danaf, “Of what dost
thou take counsel with Hasan Shuman? Is the Pestilent one any great
shakes?” Said Hasan, “O Ali, why dost thou disparage me? By the Most
Great Name, I will not company with thee at this time!”; and he rose and
went out in wrath. Then said Ahmad, “O my braves, let every sergeant
take ten men, each to his own quarter and search for Dalilah.” All did
his bidding, Ali included, and they said, “Ere we disperse let us agree
to rendezvous in the quarter Al-Kalkh.” It was noised abroad in the city
that Calamity Ahmad had undertaken to lay hands on Dalilah the Wily, and
Zaynab said to her, “O my mother, an thou be indeed a trickstress, do
thou befool Ahmad al-Danaf and his company.” Answered Dalilah, “I fear
none save Hasan Shuman;” and Zaynab said, “By the life of my brow-lock,
I will assuredly get thee the clothes of all the one-and-forty.” Then
she dressed and veiled herself and going to a certain druggist, who had
a saloon with two doors, salamed to him and gave him an ashrafi and said
to him, “Take this gold piece as a douceur for thy saloon and let it to
me till the end of the day.” So he gave her the keys and she fetched
carpets and so forth on the stolen ass and furnishing the place, set on
each raised pavement a tray of meat and wine. Then she went out and
stood at the door, with her face unveiled and behold, up came Ali Kitf
al-Jamal and his men. She kissed his hand; and he fell in love with her,
seeing her to be a handsome girl, and said to her, “What dost thou
want?” Quoth she, “Art thou Captain Ahmad al-Danaf?”; and quoth he, “No,
but I am of his company and my name is Ali Camel-shoulder.” Asked she,
“Whither fare you?”; and he answered, “We go about in quest of a
sharkish old woman, who hath stolen folk’s good, and we mean to lay
hands on her. But who art thou and what is thy business?” She replied,
“My father was a taverner at Mosul and he died and left me much money.
So I came hither, for fear of the Dignities, and asked the people who
would protect me, to which they replied:—None but Ahmad al-Danaf.” Said
the men, “From this day forth, thou art under his protection”; and she
replied, “Hearten me by eating a bit and drinking a sup of water.”[210]
They consented and entering, ate and drank till they were drunken, when
she drugged them with Bhang and stripped them of their clothes and arms;
and on like wise she did with the three other companions. Presently,
Calamity Ahmad went out to look for Dalilah, but found her not, neither
set eyes on any of his followers, and went on till he came to the door
where Zaynab was standing. She kissed his hand and he looked on her and
fell in love with her. Quoth she, “Art thou Captain Ahmad al-Danaf?”;
and quoth he, “Yes: who art thou?” She replied, “I am a stranger from
Mosul. My father was a vintner at that place and he died and left me
much money wherewith I came to this city, for fear of the powers that
be, and opened this tavern. The Master of Police hath imposed a tax on
me, but it is my desire to put myself under thy protection and pay thee
what the police would take of me, for thou hast the better right to it.”
Quoth he, “Do not pay him aught: thou shalt have my protection and
welcome.” Then quoth she, “Please to heal my heart and eat of my
victual.” So he entered and ate and drank wine, till he could not sit
upright, when she drugged him and took his clothes and arms. Then she
loaded her purchase on the Badawi’s horse and the donkey-boy’s ass and
made off with it, after she had aroused Ali Kitf al-Jamal.
Camel-shoulder awoke and found himself naked and saw Ahmad and his men
drugged and stripped: so he revived them with the counter-drug and they
awoke and found themselves naked. Quoth Calamity Ahmad, “O lads, what is
this? We were going to catch her, and lo! this strumpet hath caught us!
How Hasan Shuman will rejoice over us! But we will wait till it is dark
and then go away.” Meanwhile Pestilence Hasan said to the hall-keeper,
“Where are the men?”; and as he asked, up they came naked; and he
recited these two couplets[211]:—
Men in their purposes are much alike, ✿ But in their issues difference
comes to light:
Of men some wise are, others simple souls; ✿ As of the stars some dull,
some pearly bright.
Then he looked at them and asked, “Who hath played you this trick and
made you naked?”; and they answered, “We went in quest of an old woman,
and a pretty girl stripped us.” Quoth Hasan, “She hath done right well.”
They asked, “Dost thou know her?”; and he answered, “Yes, I know her and
the old trot too.” Quoth they, “What shall we say to the Caliph?”; and
quoth he, “O Danaf, do thou shake thy collar before him, and he will
say:—Who is answerable for her; and if he ask why thou hast not caught
her; say thou:—We know her not; but charge Hasan Shuman with her. And if
he give her into my charge, I will lay hands on her.” So they slept that
night and on the morrow they went up to the Caliph’s Divan and kissed
ground before him. Quoth he, “Where is the old woman, O Captain Ahmad?”
But he shook his collar. The Caliph asked him why he did so, and he
answered, “I know her not; but do thou charge Hasan Shuman to lay hands
on her, for he knoweth her and her daughter also.” Then Hasan interceded
for her with the Caliph, saying, “Indeed, she hath not played off these
tricks, because she coveted the folk’s stuff, but to show her cleverness
and that of her daughter, to the intent that thou shouldst continue her
husband’s stipend to her and that of her father to her daughter. So an
thou wilt spare her life I will fetch her to thee.” Cried the Caliph,
“By the life of my ancestors, if she restore the people’s goods, I will
pardon her on thine intercession!” And said the Pestilence, “Give me a
pledge, O Prince of True Believers!” Whereupon Al-Rashid gave him the
kerchief of pardon. So Hasan repaired to Dalilah’s house and called to
her. Her daughter Zaynab answered him and he asked her, “Where is thy
mother?” “Upstairs,” she answered; and he said, “Bid her take the
people’s goods and come with me to the presence of the Caliph; for I
have brought her the kerchief of pardon, and if she will not come with a
good grace, let her blame only herself.” So Dalilah came down and tying
the kerchief about her neck gave him the people’s goods on the
donkey-boy’s ass and the Badawi’s horse. Quoth he, “There remain the
clothes of my Chief and his men”; and quoth she, “By the Most Great
Name, ’twas not I who stripped them!” Rejoined Hasan, “Thou sayst sooth,
it was thy daughter Zaynab’s doing, and this was a good turn she did
thee.” Then he carried her to the Divan and laying the people’s goods
and stuff before the Caliph, set the old trot in his presence. As soon
as he saw her, he bade throw her down on the carpet of blood, whereat
she cried, “I cast myself on thy protection, O Shuman!” So he rose and
kissing the Caliph’s hands, said, “Pardon, O Commander of the Faithful!
Indeed, thou gavest me the kerchief of pardon.” Said the Prince of True
Believers, “I pardon her for thy sake: come hither, O old woman; what is
thy name?” “My name is Wily Dalilah,” answered she, and the Caliph said,
“Thou art indeed crafty and full of guile.” Whence she was dubbed
Dalilah the Wily One. Then quoth he, “Why hast thou played all these
tricks on the folk and wearied our hearts?” and quoth she, “I did it not
of lust for their goods, but because I had heard of the tricks which
Ahmad al-Danaf and Hasan Shuman played in Baghdad and said to myself:—I
too will do the like. And now I have returned the folk their goods.” But
the ass-driver rose and said, “I invoke Allah’s law[212] between me and
her; for it sufficed her not to take my ass, but she must needs egg on
the Moorish barber to tear out my eye-teeth and fire me on both
temples.”——And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her
permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Eighth Night,
She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the
donkey-boy rose and cried out, “I invoke Allah’s law between me and her;
for it sufficed her not to take my ass, but she must needs egg on the
barber to tear out my eye-teeth and fire me on both temples;” thereupon
the Caliph bade give him an hundred dinars and ordered the dyer the
like, saying, “Go; set up thy dyery again.” So they called down
blessings on his head and went away. The Badawi also took his clothes
and horse and departed, saying, “’Tis henceforth unlawful and forbidden
me to enter Baghdad and eat honey-fritters.” And the others took their
goods and went away. Then said the Caliph, “Ask a boon of me, O
Dalilah!”; and she said, “Verily, my father was governor of the
carrier-pigeons to thee and I know how to rear the birds; and my husband
was town-captain of Baghdad. Now I wish to have the reversion of my
husband and my daughter wisheth to have that of her father.” The Caliph
granted both their requests and she said, “I ask of thee that I may be
portress of thy Khan.” Now he had built a Khan of three stories, for the
merchants to lodge in, and had assigned to its service forty slaves and
also forty dogs he had brought from the King of the Sulaymániyah,[213]
when he deposed him; and there was in the Khan a cook-slave, who cooked
for the chattels and fed the hounds for which he let make collars. Said
the Caliph, “O Dalilah, I will write thee a patent of guardianship of
the Khan, and if aught be lost therefrom, thou shalt be answerable for
it.” “’Tis well,” replied she; “but do thou lodge my daughter in the
pavilion over the door of the Khan, for it hath terraced roofs, and
carrier-pigeons may not be reared to advantage save in an open space.”
The Caliph granted her this also and she and her daughter removed to the
pavilion in question, where Zaynab hung up the one-and-forty dresses of
Calamity Ahmad and his company. Moreover, they delivered to Dalilah the
forty pigeons which carried the royal messages, and the Caliph appointed
the Wily One mistress over the forty slaves and charged them to obey
her. She made the place of her sitting behind the door of the Khan, and
every day she used to go up to the Caliph’s Divan, lest he should need
to send a message by pigeon-post and stay there till eventide whilst the
forty slaves stood on guard at the Khan; and when darkness came on they
loosed the forty dogs that they might keep watch over the place by
night. Such were the doings of Dalilah the Wily One in Baghdad and much
like them were
-----
Footnote 179:
This and the next tale are omitted by Lane (iii. 254) on “account of
its vulgarity, rendered more objectionable by indecent incidents.” It
has been honoured with a lithographed reprint at Cairo A.H. 1278 and
the Bresl. Edit. ix. 193 calls it the “Tale of Ahmad al-Danaf with
Dalílah.”
Footnote 180:
“Ahmad, the Distressing Sickness,” or “Calamity”; Hasan the Pestilent
and Dalílah the bawd. See vol. ii. 329, and vol. iv. 75.
Footnote 181:
A fœtus, a foundling, a contemptible fellow.
Footnote 182:
In the Mac. Edit. “her husband”: the end of the tale shows the error,
_infra_, p. 171. The Bresl. Edit., x. 195, informs us that Dalilah was
a “Faylasúfíyah” = philosopheress.
Footnote 183:
Arab. “Ibrík” usually a ewer, a spout-pot, from the Pers. Ab-ríz =
water-pourer; the old woman thus vaunted her ceremonial purity. The
basin and ewer are called in poetry “the two rumourers,” because they
rattle when borne about.
Footnote 184:
Khátún in Turk. is = a lady, a dame of high degree; at times, as here
and elsewhere, it becomes a P. N.
Footnote 185:
Arab. “Maut,” a word mostly avoided in the Koran and by the Founder of
Christianity.
Footnote 186:
Arab. “Akákír,” drugs, spices, simples which cannot be distinguished
without study and practice. Hence the proverb (Burckhardt, 703), Is
this an art of drugs?—difficult as the druggist’s craft?
Footnote 187:
_i.e._ Beautiful as the fairy damsels who guard enchanted treasures,
such as that of Al-Shamardal (vol. vi. 221).
Footnote 188:
_i.e._ by contact with a person in a state of ceremonial impurity;
servants are not particular upon this point and “Salát mamlúkíyah”
(Mameluke’s prayers) means praying without ablution.
Footnote 189:
_i.e._ Father of assaults, burdens or pregnancies; the last being here
the meaning.
Footnote 190:
Ex votos and so forth.
Footnote 191:
Arab. “Iksah,” plaits, braids, also the little gold coins and other
ornaments worn in the hair, now mostly by the middle and lower
classes. Low Europeans sometimes take advantage of the native
prostitutes by detaching these valuables, a form of “bilking” peculiar
to the Nile-Valley.
Footnote 192:
In Bresl. Edit. Malíh Kawí (pron. ’Awi), a Cairene vulgarism.
Footnote 193:
Meaning without veil or upper clothing.
Footnote 194:
Arab. “Kallakás” the edible African arum before explained. This
Colocasia is supposed to bear, unlike the palm, male and female
flowers in one spathe.
Footnote 195:
See vol. iii. 302. The figs refer to the anus and the pomegranates,
like the sycomore, to the female parts. Me nec fæmina nec puer, &c.,
says Horace in pensive mood.
Footnote 196: