said to Hasan, son of Mohsin the merchant, “Rise up and follow me, and I
will show her naked to thee.” So he rose and took with him a thousand
dinars, saying in himself, “Haply we may need to buy somewhat or pay the
fees for drawing up the marriage contract.” The old woman bade him walk
behind the young lady at a distance but within shot of sight and said to
herself, “Where wilt thou carry the young lady and the merchant that
thou mayest strip them both whilst his shop is still shut?” Then she
walked on and Khatun after her, followed by the young merchant, till she
came to a dyery, kept by a master dyer, by name Hajj Mohammed, a man of
ill-repute; like the colocasia[194] seller’s knife cutting male and
female, and loving to eat both figs and pomegranates.[195] He heard the
tinkle of the ankle rings and, raising his head, saw the lady and the
young man. Presently the old woman came up to him and, after salaaming
to him and sitting down opposite him, asked him, “Art thou not Hajj
Mohammed the dyer?” He answered, “Yes, I am he: what dost thou want?”
Quoth she, “Verily, folks of fair repute have directed me to thee. Look
at yonder handsome girl, my daughter, and that comely beardless youth,
my son; I brought them both up and spent much money on both of them.
Now, thou must know that I have a big old ruinous house which I have
shored up with wood, and the builder saith to me:—Go and live in some
other place, lest belike it fall upon thee; and when this is repaired
return hither. So I went forth to seek me a lodging, and people of worth
directed me to thee, and I wish to lodge my son and daughter with thee.”
Quoth the dyer in his mind, “Verily, here is fresh butter upon cake come
to thee.” But he said to the old woman, “’Tis true I have a house and
saloon and upper floor; but I cannot spare any part thereof, for I want
it all for guests and for the indigo-growers my clients.” She replied,
“O my son, ’twill be only for a month or two at the most, till our house
be repaired, and we are strange folk. Let the guest-chamber be shared
between us and thee, and by thy life, O my son, an thou desire that thy
guests be ours, we will welcome them and eat with them and sleep with
them.” Then he gave her the keys, one big and one small and one crooked,
saying to her, “The big key is that of the house, the crooked one that
of the saloon and the little one that of the upper floor.” So Dalilah
took the keys and fared on, followed by the lady who forwent the young
merchant, till she came to the lane wherein was the house. She opened
the door and entered, introducing the damsel to whom said she, “O my
daughter, this (pointing to the saloon) is the lodging of the Shaykh Abu
al-Hamlat; but go thou into the upper floor and loose thy outer veil and
wait till I come to thee.” So she went up and sat down. Presently
appeared the young merchant, whom Dalilah carried into the saloon,
saying, “Sit down, whilst I fetch my daughter and show her to thee.” So
he sat down and the old trot went up to Khatun who said to her, “I wish
to visit the Shaykh, before the folk come.” Replied the beldame, “O my
daughter, we fear for thee.” Asked Khatun, “Why so?” and Dalilah
answered, “Because here is a son of mine, a natural who knoweth not
summer from winter, but goeth ever naked. He is the Shaykh’s deputy and,
if he saw a girl like thee come to visit his chief, he would snatch her
earrings and tear her ears and rend her silken robes.[196] So do thou
doff thy jewellery and clothes and I will keep them for thee, till thou
hast made thy pious visitation.” Accordingly the damsel did off her
outer dress and jewels and gave them to the old woman, who said, “I will
lay them for thee on the Shaykh’s curtain, that a blessing may betide
thee.” Then she went out, leaving the lady in her shift and
petticoat-trousers, and hid the clothes and jewels in a place on the
staircase; after which she betook herself to the young merchant, whom
she found impatiently awaiting the girl, and he cried, “Where is thy
daughter, that I may see her?” But she smote palm on breast and he said,
“What aileth thee?” Quoth she, “Would there were no such thing as the
ill neighbour and the envious! They saw thee enter the house with me and
asked me of thee; and I said:—This is a bridegroom I have found for my
daughter. So they envied me on thine account and said to my girl, Is thy
mother tired of keeping thee, that she marrieth thee to a leper?
Thereupon I swore to her that she should not see thee save naked.” Quoth
he, “I take refuge with Allah from the envious,” and baring his forearm,
showed her that it was like silver. Said she, “Have no fear; thou shalt
see her naked, even as she shall see thee naked;” and he said, “Let her
come and look at me.” Then he put off his pelisse and sables and his
girdle and dagger and the rest of his raiment, except his shirt and
bag-trousers, and would have laid the purse of a thousand dinars with
them, but Dalilah cried, “Give them to me, that I may take care of
them.” So she took them and fetching the girl’s clothes and jewellery
shouldered the whole and locking the door upon them went her ways.——And
Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Second Night,
She pursued, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the old
woman had taken the property of the young merchant and the damsel and
wended her ways, having locked the door upon them, she deposited her
spoils with a druggist of her acquaintance and returned to the dyer,
whom she found sitting, awaiting her. Quoth he, “Inshallah, the house
pleaseth thee?”; and quoth she, “There is a blessing in it; and I go now
to fetch porters to carry hither our goods and furniture. But my
children would have me bring them a _panade_ with meat; so do thou take
this dinar and buy the dish and go and eat the morning meal with them.”
Asked the dyer, “Who shall guard the dyery meanwhile and the people’s
goods that be therein?”; and the old woman answered, “Thy lad!” “So be
it,” rejoined he, and taking a dish and cover, went out to do her
bidding. So far concerning the dyer who will again be mentioned in the
tale; but as regards the old woman, she fetched the clothes and jewels
she had left with the druggist and going back to the dyery, said to the
lad, “Run after thy master, and I will not stir hence till you both
return.” “To hear is to obey,” answered he and went away, while she
began to collect all the customers’ goods. Presently, there came up an
ass-driver, a scavenger, who had been out of work for a week and who was
an Hashísh-eater to boot; and she called him, saying, “Hither, O
donkey-boy!” So he came to her and she asked, “Knowest thou my son the
dyer?”; whereto he answered, “Yes, I know him.” Then she said, “The poor
fellow is insolvent and loaded with debts, and as often as he is put in
prison, I set him free. Now we wish to see him declared bankrupt and I
am going to return the goods to their owners; so do thou lend me thine
ass to carry the load and receive this dinar to its hire. When I am
gone, take the handsaw and empty out the vats and jars and break them,
so that if there come an officer from the Kází’s court, he may find
nothing in the dyery.” Quoth he, “I owe the Hajj a kindness and will do
something for Allah’s love.” So she laid the things on the ass and, the
Protector protecting her, made for her own house; so that she arrived
there in safety and went in to her daughter Zaynab, who said to her, “O
my mother, my heart hath been with thee! What hast thou done by way of
roguery?” Dalilah replied, “I have played off four tricks on four
wights; the wife of the Serjeant-usher, a young merchant, a dyer and an
ass-driver, and have brought thee all their spoil on the donkey-boy’s
beast.” Cried Zaynab, “O my mother, thou wilt never more be able to go
about the town, for fear of the Serjeant-usher, whose wife’s raiment and
jewellery thou hast taken, and the merchant whom thou hast stripped
naked, and the dyer whose customers’ goods thou hast stolen and the
owner of the ass.” Rejoined the old woman, “Pooh, my girl! I reck not of
them, save the donkey-boy, who knoweth me.” Meanwhile the dyer bought
the meat-panade and set out for the house, followed by his servant with
the food on head. On his way thither, he passed his shop, where he found
the donkey-boy breaking the vats and jars and saw that there was neither
stuff nor liquor left in them and that the dyery was in ruins. So he
said to him, “Hold thy hand, O ass-driver;” and the donkey-boy desisted
and cried, “Praised be Allah for thy safety, O master! Verily my heart
was with thee.” “Why so?” “Thou art become bankrupt and they have filed
a docket of thine insolvency.” “Who told thee this?” “Thy mother told
me, and bade me break the jars and empty the vats, that the Kazi’s
officers might find nothing in the shop, if they should come.” “Allah
confound the far One!”[197] cried the dyer; “My mother died long ago.”
And he beat his breast, exclaiming, “Alas, for the loss of my goods and
those of the folk!” The donkey-boy also wept and ejaculated, “Alas, for
the loss of my ass!”; and he said to the dyer, “Give me back my beast
which thy mother stole from me.” The dyer laid hold of him by the throat
and fell to buffeting him, saying, “Bring me the old woman;” whilst the
other buffeted him in return saying, “Give me back my beast.” So they
beat and cursed each other, till the folk collected around them——And
Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Third Night,
She resumed, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the dyer caught
hold of the donkey-boy and the donkey-boy caught hold of the dyer and
they beat and cursed each other till the folk collected round them and
one of them asked, “What is the matter, O Master Mohammed?” The
ass-driver answered, “I will tell thee the tale,” and related to them
his story, saying, “I deemed I was doing the dyer a good turn; but, when
he saw me he beat his breast and said, My mother is dead. And now, I for
one require my ass of him, it being he who hath put this trick on me,
that he might make me lose my beast.” Then said the folk to the dyer, “O
Master Mohammed, dost thou know this matron, that thou didst entrust her
with the dyery and all therein?” And he replied, “I know her not; but
she took lodgings with me to-day, she and her son and daughter.” Quoth
one, “In my judgment, the dyer is bound to indemnify the ass-driver.”
Quoth another, “Why so?” “Because,” replied the first, “he trusted not
the old woman nor gave her his ass save only because he saw that the
dyer had entrusted her with the dyery and its contents.” And a third
said, “O master, since thou hast lodged her with thee, it behoveth thee
to get the man back his ass.” Then they made for the house, and the tale
will come round to them again. Meanwhile, the young merchant remained
awaiting the old woman’s coming with her daughter, but she came not nor
did her daughter; whilst the young lady in like manner sat expecting her
return with leave from her son, the God-attended one, the Shaykh’s
deputy, to go in to the holy presence. So weary of waiting, she rose to
visit the Shaykh by herself and went down into the saloon, where she
found the young merchant, who said to her, “Come hither! where is thy
mother, who brought me to marry thee?” She replied, “My mother is dead,
art thou the old woman’s son, the ecstatic, the deputy of the Shaykh Abu
al-Hamlat?” Quoth he, “The swindling old trot is no mother of mine; she
hath cheated me and taken my clothes and a thousand dinars.” Quoth
Khatun, “And me also hath she swindled for she brought me to see the
Shaykh Abu al-Hamlat and in lieu of so doing she hath stripped me.”
Thereupon he, “I look to thee to make good my clothes and my thousand
dinars;” and she, “I look to thee to make good my clothes and
jewellery.” And, behold, at this moment in came the dyer and seeing them
both stripped of their raiment, said to them, “Tell me where your mother
is.” So the young lady related all that had befallen her and the young
merchant related all that had betided him, and the Master-dyer
exclaimed, “Alas, for the loss of my goods and those of the folk!”; and
the ass-driver ejaculated, “Alas, for my ass! Give me, O dyer, my ass!”
Then said the dyer, “This old woman is a sharper. Come forth, that I may
lock the door.” Quoth the young merchant, “’Twere a disgrace to thee
that we should enter thy house dressed and go forth from it undressed.”
So the dyer clad him and the damsel and sent her back to her house where
we shall find her after the return of her husband. Then he shut the
dyery and said to the young merchant, “Come, let us go and search for
the old woman and hand her over to the Wali,[198] the Chief of Police.”
So they and the ass-man repaired to the house of the master of police
and made their complaint to him. Quoth he, “O folk, what want ye?” and
when they told him he rejoined, “How many old women are there not in the
town! Go ye and seek for her and lay hands on her and bring her to me,
and I will torture her for you and make her confess.” So they sought for
her all round the town; and an account of them will presently be
given.[199] As for old Dalilah the Wily, she said, “I have a mind to
play off another trick,” to her daughter who answered, “O my mother, I
fear for thee;” but the beldam cried, “I am like the bean husks which
fall, proof against fire and water.” So she rose, and donning a
slave-girl’s dress of such as serve people of condition, went out to
look for some one to defraud. Presently she came to a by-street, spread
with carpets and lighted with hanging lamps, and heard a noise of
singing-women and drumming of tambourines. Here she saw a handmaid
bearing on her shoulder a boy, clad in trousers laced with silver and a
little Abá-cloak of velvet, with a pearl embroidered Tarbush-cap on his
head, and about his neck a collar of gold set with jewels. Now the house
belonged to the Provost of the Merchants of Baghdad, and the boy was his
son. He had a virgin daughter, to boot, who was promised in marriage,
and it was her betrothal they were celebrating that day. There was with
her mother a company of noble dames and singing-women, and whenever she
went upstairs or down, the boy clung to her. So she called the
slave-girl and said to her, “Take thy young master and play with him,
till the company break up.” Seeing this, Dalilah asked the handmaid,
“What festivities are these in your mistress’s house;” and was answered,
“She celebrates her daughter’s betrothal this day, and she hath
singing-women with her.” Quoth the old woman to herself, “O Dalilah, the
thing to do is to spirit away this boy from the maid,”——And Shahrazad
perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Fourth Night,
She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the old trot
said to herself, “O Dalilah, the thing to do is to spirit away this boy
from the maid!” she began crying out, “O disgrace! O ill luck!” Then
pulling out a brass token, resembling a dinar, she said to the maid, who
was a simpleton, “Take this ducat and go in to thy mistress and say to
her:—Umm al-Khayr rejoiceth with thee and is beholden to thee for thy
favours, and on the day of assembly she and her daughters will visit
thee and handsel the tiring-women with the usual gifts.” Said the girl,
“O my mother, my young master here catcheth hold of his mamma, whenever
he seeth her;” and she replied “Give him to me, whilst thou goest in and
comest back.” So she gave her the child and taking the token, went in;
whereupon Dalilah made off with the boy to a by-lane, where she stripped
him of his clothes and jewels, saying to herself, “O Dalilah, ’twould
indeed be the finest of tricks, even as thou hast cheated the maid and
taken the boy from her, so now to carry on the game and pawn him for a
thousand dinars.” So she repaired to the jewel-bazar, where she saw a
Jew goldsmith seated with a cage full of jewellery before him, and said
to herself, “’Twould be a rare trick to chouse this Jew fellow and get a
thousand gold pieces worth of jewellery from him and leave the boy in
pledge for it.” Presently the Jew looked at them and seeing the boy with
the old woman, knew him for the son of the Provost of the Merchants. Now
the Israelite was a man of great wealth, but would envy his neighbour if
he sold and himself did not sell; so espying Dalilah, he said to her,
“What seekest thou, O my mistress?” She asked, “Art thou Master
Azariah[200] the Jew?” having first enquired his name of others; and he
answered, “Yes.” Quoth she, “This boy’s sister, daughter of the
Shahbandar of the Merchants, is a promised bride, and to-day they
celebrate her betrothal; and she hath need of jewellery. So give me two
pair of gold ankle-rings, a brace of gold bracelets, and pearl
ear-drops, with a girdle, a poignard and a seal-ring.” He brought them
out and she took of him a thousand dinars’ worth of jewellery, saying,
“I will take these ornaments on approval; and whatso pleaseth them, they
will keep and I will bring thee the price and leave this boy with thee
till then.” He said, “Be it as thou wilt!” So she took the jewellery and
made off to her own house, where her daughter asked her how the trick
had sped. She told her how she had taken and stripped the Shahbandar’s
boy, and Zaynab said, “Thou wilt never be able to walk abroad again in
the town.” Meanwhile, the maid went in to her mistress and said to her,
“O my lady, Umm al-Khayr saluteth thee and rejoiceth with thee and on
assembly-day she will come, she and her daughters, and give the
customary presents.” Quoth her mistress, “Where is thy young master?”
Quoth the slave-girl, “I left him with her lest he cling to thee, and
she gave me this, as largesse for the singing-women.” So the lady said
to the chief of the singers, “Take thy money;” and she took it and found
it a brass counter; whereupon the lady cried to the maid, “Get thee
down, O whore, and look to thy young master.” Accordingly, she went down
and finding neither boy nor old woman, shrieked aloud and fell on her
face. Their joy was changed into annoy, and behold, the Provost came in,
when his wife told him all that had befallen and he went out in quest of
the child, whilst the other merchants also fared forth and each sought
his own road. Presently, the Shahbandar, who had looked everywhere,
espied his son seated, naked, in the Jew’s shop and said to the owner,
“This is my son.” “’Tis well,” answered the Jew. So he took him up,
without asking for his clothes, of the excess of his joy at finding him;
but the Jew laid hold of him, saying, “Allah succour the Caliph against
thee!”[201] The Provost asked, “What aileth thee, O Jew?”; and he
answered, “Verily the old woman took of me a thousand dinars’ worth of
jewellery for thy daughter, and left this lad in pledge for the price;
and I had not trusted her, but that she offered to leave the child whom
I knew for thy son.” Said the Provost, “My daughter needeth no
jewellery, give me the boy’s clothes.” Thereupon the Jew shrieked out,
“Come to my aid, O Moslems!” but at that moment up came the dyer and the
ass-man and the young merchant, who were going about, seeking the old
woman, and enquired the cause of their jangle. So they told them the
case and they said, “This old woman is a cheat, who hath cheated us
before you.” Then they recounted to them how she had dealt with them,
and the Provost said, “Since I have found my son, be his clothes his
ransom! If I come upon the old woman, I will require them of her.” And
he carried the child home to his mother, who rejoiced in his safety.
Then the Jew said to the three others, “Whither go ye?”; and they
answered, “We go to look for her.” Quoth the Jew, “Take me with you,”
presently adding, “Is there any one of you knoweth her?” The donkey-boy
cried, “I know her;” and the Jew said, “If we all go forth together, we
shall never catch her; for she will flee from us. Let each take a
different road, and be our rendezvous at the shop of Hajj Mas’úd, the
Moorish barber.” They agreed to this and set off, each in a different
direction. Presently, Dalilah sallied forth again to play her tricks and
the ass-driver met her and knew her. So he caught hold of her and said
to her, “Woe to thee! Hast thou been long at this trade?” She asked,
“What aileth thee?”; and he answered, “Give me back my ass.” Quoth she,
“Cover what Allah covereth, O my son! Dost thou seek thine ass and the
people’s things?” Quoth he, “I want my ass; that’s all;” and quoth she,
“I saw that thou wast poor: so I deposited thine ass for thee with the
Moorish barber. Stand off, whilst I speak him fair, that he may give
thee the beast.” So she went up to the Maghrabi and kissed his hand and
shed tears. He asked her what ailed her and she said, “O my son, look at
my boy who standeth yonder. He was ill and exposed himself to the air,
which injured his intellect. He used to buy asses and now, if he stand
he saith nothing but, My ass! if he sit he crieth, My ass! and if he
walk he crieth, My ass! Now I have been told by a certain physician that
his mind is disordered and that nothing will cure him but drawing two of
his grinders and cauterising him twice on either temple. So do thou take
this dinar and call him to thee, saying:—Thine ass is with me.” Said the
barber, “May I fast for a year, if I do not give him his ass in his
fist!” Now he had with him two journeymen, so he said to one of them,
“Go, heat the irons.” Then the old woman went her way and the barber
called to the donkey-boy,[202] saying, “Thine ass is with me, good
fellow! come and take him, and as thou livest, I will give him into thy
palm.” So he came to him and the barber carried him into a dark room,
where he knocked him down and the journeymen bound him hand and foot.
Then the Maghrabi arose and pulled out two of his grinders and fired him
on either temple; after which he let him go, and he rose and said, “O
Moor, why hast thou used me with this usage?” Quoth the barber, “Thy
mother told me that thou hadst taken cold whilst ill, and hadst lost thy
reason, so that, whether sitting or standing or walking, thou wouldst
say nothing but My ass! So here is thine ass in thy fist.” Said the
other, “Allah requite thee for pulling out my teeth.” Then the barber
told him all that the old woman had related and he exclaimed, “Allah
torment her!”; and the twain left the shop and went out, disputing. When
the barber returned, he found his booth empty, for, whilst he was
absent, the old woman had taken all that was therein and made off with
it to her daughter, whom she acquainted with all that had befallen and
all she had done. The barber, seeing his place plundered, caught hold of
the donkey-boy and said to him, “Bring me thy mother.” But he answered,
saying, “She is not my mother; she is a sharper who hath cozened much
people and stolen my ass.” And lo! at this moment up came the dyer and
the Jew and the young merchant, and seeing the Moorish barber holding on
to the ass-driver who was fired on both temples, they said to him, “What
hath befallen thee, O donkey-boy?” So he told them all that had betided
him and the barber did the like; and the others in turn related to the
Moor the tricks the old woman had played them. Then he shut up his shop
and went with them to the office of the Police-master to whom they said,
“We look to thee for our case and our coin.”[203] Quoth the Wali, “And
how many old women are there not in Baghdad! Say me, doth any of you
know her?” Quoth the ass-man, “I do; so give me ten of thine officers.”
He gave them half a score archers and they all five went out, followed
by the sergeants, and patrolled the city, till they met the old woman,
when they laid hands on her and carrying her to the house of the Chief
of Police, stood waiting under his office windows till he should come
forth. Presently, the warders fell asleep, for excess of watching with
their chief, and old Dalilah feigned to follow their example, till the
ass-man and his fellows slept likewise, when she stole away from them
and, going in to the Wali’s Harim, kissed the hand of the mistress of
the house and asked her, “Where is the Chief of Police?” The lady
answered, “He is asleep; what wouldst thou with him?” Quoth Dalilah, “My
husband is a merchant of chattels and gave me five Mamelukes to sell,
whilst he went on a journey. The Master of Police met me and bought them
of me for a thousand dinars and two hundred for myself, saying:—Bring
them to my house. So I have brought them.”——And Shahrazad perceived the
dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.
Now when it was the Seven Hundred and Fifth Night,