"She played at cards, and died."
Miss Georgiana--the beauty, and greatest fool of the family, who
_depended_ on her face as a fortune, did get a husband--an old, rich West
India planter, and eloped, six months after marriage, with an officer of
dragoons.
Miss Celestina was really clever and accomplished. "Use her abilities for
her own support!" Oh, no! not for worlds--Too proud to work, but not too
proud to beg, she _depended_ on her relations, and played toady to all who
would.
Miss Louisa--not clever; but in all other respects, ditto--ditto.
Miss Charlotte was always very romantic; refused a respectable banker with
indignation, and married her uncle's footman--for love.
Having sketched the female part of the family first (a compliment by the
way they do not always receive from their own sex)--I will tell you what I
remember of the gentlemen.
"The Emperor," as Mr. Augustus was called, from his stately manner and
dignified deportment, aided by as much self-esteem as could well be
contained in a human body, _depended_, without any "compunctuous visitings
of conscience," on the venison, claret, and champagne of his friends, and
thought all the time he did them honour:--and thus he passed his life.
"Dashing Dick" was the opposite of the Emperor; sung a good song--told a
good story--and gloried in making ladies blush. He _depended_ on his
cousin, Colonel Bloomfield, procuring him a commission in his regiment,
and cheated tailors, hosiers, glovers, coach-makers, and even lawyers,
with impunity. Happily for the world at large, Dashing Dick broke his neck
in a steeple chase, on a stolen horse, which he would have been hanged for
purloining, had he lived a day longer.
Ferdinand was the bonne-bouche of the family: they used to call him "the
Parson!" Excellent Ferdinand!--he _depended_ on his exertions; and, if
ever the name of Headerton rises in the scale of moral or intellectual
superiority, it will be owing to the steady and virtuous efforts of Mister
Ferdinand Headerton, merchant, in the good city of B----.
_Sketches of Irish Character, by Mrs. S.C. Hall_.
* * * * *