THE CHAPMANS MOVE INTO THE CITY
Chapman had developed Nyack pretty thoroughly, had made money enough to
feel independent, and attributed it all to his own virtues. He had got
up no end of quarrels, invented new religions, established a hotel on
principles of high moral economy, advocated broad and advanced ideas in
everything, and kept the settlement in a state of excitement generally.
Chapman was indeed a great human accident. There was no confining him to
any one thing, either in religion, politics, or finance. He had a
morality of his own, which he said belonged to the world's advanced
ideas, and it was not his fault if there were so few persons enlightened
enough to understand and appreciate it in its true sense.
Chapman was indeed not one of those men who carry blessings into a
community with them, but rather one of those who seem to delight in
planting curses wherever they go, and leaving their victims to reap the
bitter fruit in poverty and ruin. Himself a mental deformity, none of
his enterprises had been of any real benefit to the community, while his
last and most reprehensible one had resulted in emptying the pockets of
the old Dutch settlers, and leaving them bits of worthless paper to
remember him by.
And yet this man could talk of himself like a very saint. He had the
power, too, of making many of those who had suffered by his acts believe
him honest. Indeed, while one portion of the community was cursing him
for a knave, another was defending him as a really useful man--an
opinion Mrs. Chapman was always ready to endorse. In short, Chapman had
supporters in Nyack who would have sent him to Congress out of sheer
love for his talents, which they were sure would have found a happy
field for their development. Mrs. Chapman always sought to conciliate
these friends, and would invite them to tea. On these little occasions,
after discussing the merits of cider-vinegar and homemade pumpkin pies,
and the care respectable people should exercise over the company they
kept, for there was pure New England "grit" in the lady, she would recur
to her dear husband.
"All Nyack will confess how intellectually great he is," she would say;
"and show me the person who has done more to elevate the moral
respectability of Nyack. Nyack was such a dull, sleepy place when--when
we first honored it with our company. See what it now is. My dear
husband worked up these low Dutch people so; yes, and he improved their
morals. And I flatter myself I have elevated its society--a little."
Chapman had now thoroughly developed Nyack, financially and religiously.
He had saved up a nice little fortune, enough with care and good
management to keep him comfortable and give Mrs. Chapman a wider field
for the exercise of her love of display. There was now little chance of
making any more money out of Nyack, either by getting up quarrels
between neighbors or inventing new religions. So the Chapmans resolved
to go into the city and set up for very respectable people. As nobody
wanted the big house for a church Chapman rented it to Titus Bright for
an inn, and as nothing was said about moral restrictions, that worthy
friend of the thirsty and weary traveller kept it in the good
old-fashioned way of giving customers what they wanted and asking no
questions. He would much rather, Chapman said, have seen it put to a
less profane use, but as Bright was a responsible tenant, and could pay
more rent than any one else, the morality had to sink in the necessity.
A few months passed and the Chapmans were set up in New York, in a
spacious and well-furnished house on the east side of Bowling Green.
Chapman was soon busy looking after the affairs of the great firm of
Topman and Gusher, which I need scarcely tell the reader was a creation
of his. Mrs. Chapman soon had enough to do at pushing her way into
society. But the more she pushed the more did little social obstructions
seem to rise up and defeat her efforts. She would associate with
first-rate society, she said, or none; and Mattie should be introduced
and shine in the "upper circles."
Bowling Green stood on its dignity in those days. There were very nice
and very old families living there then, and they kept themselves rolled
up in their wealth and comfort, and looked coldly down on all new and
pretentious people. West Bowling Green, too, put on airs of superiority
over East Bowling Green, which it affected to designate with the term
"rather vulgar." They were quiet, well brought up people on the West
side, people who had made a family name and were proud of it, whose
superior enterprise and genius had raised them above ordinary people,
and who had acquired wealth by honorable means.
There was, indeed, a charm about these families, made more attractive by
the simplicity and gentleness of their manners, for they were refined,
and entertained their friends generously. In short, West Bowling Green
and a portion of the Battery had at that day a social empire of its
own, which had a flavor of rich old wine about it, and was as distinct
as distinguished in all its surroundings. It rode in its own carriage,
had orderly and well-dressed coachmen, wore an air of great
circumspection, dined at five o'clock, and lived like a well-bred
gentleman.
East Bowling Green had begun to lose cast, and, indeed, was under a
cloud socially. Its society was made up of new, fast, and somewhat showy
people, whose antecedents it was difficult to get at, (at least West
Bowling Green said so,) and who, for want of a family reputation, put on
the airs of a vulgarian. These people spent their money freely, and
seemed to have enough of it, but they aspired to make a show rather than
secure real enjoyment. They associated with third-rate people, and vied
with each other in giving parties and balls to which all the young
swells in town were invited. In fine, East Bowling Green had a cheap,
retail flavor about it which all its show and extravagance failed either
to conceal or atone for.
Mrs. Chapman had resided three months in Bowling Green, and yet
first-class society had kept its doors closed--did not even condescend a
smile. This was very mortifying to a lady whose pretentions were quite
equal to her dimensions. A few second and third-rate people had made a
formal call, or left a card. But it was merely as a matter of ceremony.
Mr. Pinks, the elegant old beau of the Green, who was looked up to by
first-rate society everywhere, and considered himself born to stand
guard over it and protect it from vulgar contact, and who was accepted
as authority in all matters of etiquette, and had standing invitations
to dinner with all the best families, had called to pay his respects and
congratulate the lady. But Pinks considered this strictly a matter of
duty--to make an observation.
When Beau Pinks reported the result of his call to the Warburton family,
who were first-rate people, and the Warburton family spread it through
West Bowling Green, there was great amusement in the neighborhood.
"Won't do, the lady won't," said Pinks, lowering his voice to a whisper,
and shaking his head. "Lady weighs two hundred pounds and more. A dead
weight on the back of any society. Very pretentious, but makes shocking
work of the King's English, and discovers low origin in her conversation
generally. Puts on finery without regard to color or complexion, told me
how many new dresses she had making, has big, fat hands, and wears
common gold rings. Worse than all," continued Pinks, raising his hands,
"the lady wanted to know if I could tell her how to reform servants, and
if I liked rhubarb pies for breakfast."
With such a report from Pinks it was no wonder first-rate society did
not take kindly to the lady. The rhubarb pies for breakfast settled the
question in Pinks' mind, and he never called again, though he kept up a
bowing acquaintance with the lady. Mrs. Chapman now fell back on a
reception. A reception would be the thing to make Bowling Green
surrender. The day was set and cards sent out, and notwithstanding Mr.
Gusher, who was her standing ornament and idol, assisted her in drumming
up recruits, the affair turned out to be very unsatisfactory. The nice
people she invited sent regrets; and those who did come were second and
third-rate people, who never miss a reception on any account, seeing
that it affords them the cheapest means of showing themselves. There
were cheap people then, just as there are cheap people now, ready
enough to put in an appearance at a lady's reception, especially if she
gave nice suppers and had daughters to be admired. Nor was it an
uncommon thing, even at that day, for a pretentious woman who had just
set up in society, and taken to the business of reception-giving, to
find herself made the target of a little innocent satire by the nice
young gentlemen she had invited to pay her homage.
Chapman differed from his wife, inasmuch as he regarded society as a
great bore. Mrs. Chapman, however, was not a little disappointed at the
way things had turned. They were flashy and rather fast people who came
to her reception; people whom nobody of established respectability knew
or cared to know--thoughtless young men, overdressed young women with
matrimonial expectations, and a few needy foreigners with small titles.
To make the matter worse, some of the lady's guests wore eye-glasses,
through which they persisted in gazing at her, and conducted themselves
very unbecomingly. Indeed, they eat up all her supper, spoiled her
carpet, insulted her servants, and paid her certain left-handed
compliments because she had neither coffee nor wine on her side-board.
The foreigners, too, were inclined to be merry at the lady's
circumference, and at the awkwardness of her movements, as well as to be
severe on the style of her dress and the way she wore her hair.
"Who are these people?" enquired a young man, adjusting his eye-glass.
"Very new people," whispered another in reply.
"Vulgar, evidently--just set up to be somebody--don't understand it,"
rejoined a third, shrugging his shoulders.
Mr. Gusher, who had assisted the lady in beating up her recruits, had
assured them that the Chapmans were very distinguished people.
Mrs. Chapman was not more successful in setting up a carriage of her
own. She had done a great deal of pushing without affecting a lodgment
in the society she had set her heart on. With a carriage of her own she
felt that she would be just as good as any of those high old Bowling
Green people. She had read of a lady in her carriage driving right into
society and forcing a surrender.
Unfortunately the fools were not so plenty as formerly, the demand for
Kidd Discovery stock had greatly diminished, and the expense of keeping
up appearances in the city had far exceeded Chapman's calculations.
Indeed, he had already begun to talk of the necessity of economy. Topman
was already drawing heavily on the income of the firm to keep up
appearances, and the future must not be overlooked. The lady had,
therefore, to content herself with a one-horse turn-out, an
establishment not very popular in Bowling Green even at that day.
Although the lady had to accept the necessity, there was no getting
along without a coachman, and Mr. Napoleon Bowles was engaged to wear a
livery and wait on the lady in that capacity. Now Bowles stood about
five feet four inches in his boots, was very fat and very short-legged,
and very black, for he was a person of African descent and established
color. Bowles weighed at least two hundred and fifty solid, so that when
he drove his mistress out for an airing of an afternoon the whole
establishment made so shabby and yet so comical an appearance as to
afford the whole neighborhood a subject for amusement. Nor was there a
more self-important person in all Bowling Green than Bowles--except,
perhaps, it might be his mistress. But it was only when he got himself
into those tight-fitting drab trousers, and that bright blue coat with
double rows of brass buttons, and mounted that small, tall hat with the
huge buckle in front, that he fancied himself seen to advantage.
Bowles not only became a feature in Bowling Green society, but indeed
considered himself necessary to the dignity of the family he was
serving, and in duty bound to fight any coachman who would make the
slightest insinuations against it. This got him into numerous
difficulties, for there was not a coachman in the neighborhood that did
not set him down as a fair subject for unpleasant remarks. One called
him a dumpling-stomached darkey; while another said he must have been
brought up in the family and fed on puddings.
"Can't be much of a family," a third would say, "to have such a
short-legged shadow as you for coachman, and only one horse. And such a
livery as that! Why don't your mistress dress you like a man?"
Mr. Bowles had several times found himself measuring the pavement and
his hat in the gutter, as a reward for his attempts to resent such
indignities, which he considered were offered to the family rather than
himself. There was so close a resemblance between the circumference of
the lady and her coachman as to seriously damage the pretensions of the
family, and bring down upon it no end of ridicule.
There was another serious impediment to the lady's pretentions, and that
was no less a person than Mrs. Topman. No sooner had the Chapmans set up
in Bowling Green than that lady took them into her keeping, promising
them no end of introductions to nice people. Now, Mrs. Topman was one
of those social afflictions which are found everywhere, whose touch is
like contagion, and who take strangers into their keeping only to do
them more harm than good. I have called them social afflictions for want
of a better term. Mrs. Topman was the highest example of the species.
She had been beating about on the outskirts of society without gaining
an entrance into it until she was like a faded bouquet that had lost its
freshness and perfume. In short, she was a tall, rakish looking craft,
with ingeniously painted head-gear, carrying an immense amount of sail,
and flying colors not recognized by good society in Bowling Green--at
least not on the West side.