_The travellers visit a gentleman farmer, who is a great projector: his
breed of cattle: his apparatus for cooking: he is taken
dangerously ill._
After we had gone about half a mile farther, our attention was arrested
by a gate of very singular character. It was extremely ingenious in its
structure, and, among other peculiarities, it had three or four latches,
for children, for grown persons, for those who were tall and those who
were short, and for the right hand as well as the left. In the act of
opening, it was made to crush certain berries, and the oil they yielded,
was carried by a small duct to the hinge, which was thus made to turn
easily, and was prevented from creaking. While we were admiring its
mechanism, an elderly man, rather plainly dressed, on a zebra in low
condition, rode up, and showed that he was the owner of the mansion to
which the gate belonged, and that he was not displeased with the
curiosity we manifested. We found him both intelligent and obliging. He
informed us that he was an experimental farmer; and when he learnt that
we were strangers, and anxious to inform ourselves of the state of
agriculture in the country, he very civilly invited us to take our next
meal with him. Our walk having now made us hungry and fatigued, we
gladly accepted of his hospitality; whereupon he alighted, and walked
with us to his lodgings.
He was very communicative of his modes of cultivation and management,
but chiefly prided himself on his success in improving the size of his
cattle. He informed us that he had devoted sixteen years of his life to
this object, and had then in his farm-yard a buffalo nearly as heavy as
three of the ordinary size. His practice was to kill all the young
animals which were not uncommonly large and thrifty; to cram those he
kept, with as much food as they would eat, and to tempt their appetites
by the variety of their nourishment, as well as of the modes of
preparing it.
"All this," said he, "costs a great deal, it is true; but I am paid for
it by the additional price." I was struck with this notable triumph of
industry and skill in the goodly art of husbandry--that art which I
venerate above every other; and I was all anxiety to receive from him
some instructions which I might, in case I should have the good fortune
to get safely back, communicate to my friends on Long-Island, who had
never been able even to double the common size, and who boasted greatly
of that: but a hesitating look, and a few inquiries on the part of my
sly friend, checked my enthusiasm.
"Have you always," he asked, "had the same number of acres in grain and
grass under your new and old system?"
"Pretty nearly," says the other. "My new breed, however, though fewer,
consume more than their predecessors."
"How many head did you formerly sell in a year?"
"About thirty."
"How many do you now sell?"
"Though for some years I have not sold more than nine or ten, I expect
to exceed that number in another year."
"Which you expect will yield you more than the thirty did formerly?"
"Certainly; because such meat as mine commands an extraordinary price."
"So long," replied the Brahmin, "as this is novelty, you may receive a
part of the price which men are ever ready to pay for it; but as soon as
others profit by your example, your meat falls to the ordinary rate, and
then, if I understand you aright, as you will have somewhat less in
quantity than you formerly had, your gross receipts will be less, to say
nothing of your additional labour and expense."
"But who has the skill," quickly rejoined the other, "of which I can
boast? and who would take the same trouble, although they had
the skill?"
"But stop here a moment," said our host, "till I go to see how my last
improved oil-cake is relished by my cattle."
The Brahmin then turning to me, said,--"This gentleman may, indeed,
improve his fortune by the business of a grazier; but the same pains and
unremitting attention would always be sure of a liberal reward, though
the system on which they were exerted was not among the best. Nothing,
my dear Atterley, is more true than the saying of your wise book--_that
all flesh is grass;_ and it always takes the same quantity of one to
make a given quantity of the other, whether that given quantity may be
in the form of a single individual, or two or three. But in the former
case, great labour is required to force nature beyond her ordinary
limits, and the same labour must be unceasingly kept up, or she will
certainly relapse to her original dimensions. This system may do, as our
host here tells us it actually does, for the moon, but it is not suited
to our earth. If, however, you are ambitious of a name among the
speculative men of your country, this little stone," added he, stooping,
and picking up a small stone from the ground, "will answer your purpose
quite as well as any improvement in husbandry. It is precisely of the
same species as those which we threw over in our aerial voyages, and
which, though correctly called moon-stones by the vulgar, (who are
oftener right than the learned suppose,) some of the western
philosophers declared to have been gravitated in the atmosphere."
"And is this really the origin," said I, "of that strange phenomenon,
which has furnished so much matter of speculation to the sages both of
Europe and America?"
"Nothing is more true," replied he. "These stones are common to the
earth and to the moon; and some of those which have been so carefully
analyzed by your most celebrated chemists, and pronounced different from
any known mineral production of the earth, were small fragments of a
very common rock in the mountains of Burma. In our first voyages we had
taken some of them with us as ballast; and those which we first threw
over, we afterwards learnt from the public journals, fell in France,
some of the others fell in India, but the greater number in the ocean.
Those which have fallen at other times, have been real fossils of the
moon, and either such stones as this I hold in my hand, or such metallic
substances as are repelled from that body, and attracted towards the
earth; and it is the force with which they strike the earth, which first
suggested the idea of a thunder-bolt.
"Our party were greatly amused at the disputations of a learned society
in Europe, in which they undertook to give a mathematical demonstration
that they could not be thrown from a volcano of the earth, nor from the
moon, but were suddenly formed in the atmosphere. I should as soon
believe that a loaf of bread could be made and baked in the atmosphere."
Finding that our landlord prided himself on his interior management, as
well as on that without doors, we expressed a wish to see some of his
household improvements. He readily consented, and conducted us at once
into his kitchen, and showed us inventions and contrivances out of
number, for saving fuel, and meat, and labour; in short, for saving
every thing but money. The large room into which he carried us, appeared
as a vast laboratory, from the infinite variety of pots, pans, skillets,
knives, forks, ladles, mortars, sieves, funnels, and other utensils of
metal, glass, pottery, and wood. The steam which he used for cooking,
was carried along a pipe under a succession of kettles and boilers,
descending in regular gradation, by which a great saving of fuel was
effected; and, to perfect this part of the apparatus, the pipe could be
removed, to give place to one of the size suited to the occasion.
His seven-guest pipe was now in use. The wood, which was all cut to the
same length, and channelled out to admit the free passage of the air,
was then duly placed in the stove, and set on fire; but the heat not
passing very readily through all the sinuosities of the pipe, he ordered
his head cook to screw on his exhauster. The man, in less than ten
minutes, unscrewed a plate at the farther end, and fixed on an air-pump,
made for the purpose, on which the door of the stove suddenly slammed
to. Our host saw the accident, and hurrying to open the stove, fell over
a heap of channelled logs, and cut a gash in his forehead. The cook ran
to help him up; and after he was on his legs, and his forehead wiped,
the stove was opened, when the fire, which had been deprived of its
aliment, was entirely extinguished. I thought he was hardly sorry for
the accident, as it afforded him an occasion of showing how ingeniously
he kindled a fire. He had an electric machine brought to him, by means
of which he set fire to a few grains of gunpowder; this lighted some
tinder, which again ignited spirits, whose blaze reached the lower
extremity of his lamp. Taking the precaution of keeping the stove open
this time, the air was again exhausted at the farther end of the pipe,
and in a little time the flame was seen to ascend even to the air-pump,
and to scorch the parts made of wood; whereupon I saw a glow of triumph
on his face, which amply compensated him for his wound and vexation.
There was a grand machine for roasting, that carried the fire round the
meat, the juices of which, he said, by a rotary motion, would be thrown
to the surface, and either evaporate or be deteriorated. Here was also
his digestor, for making soup of rams' horns, which he assured me
contained a good deal of nourishment, and the only difficulty was in
extracting it. He next showed us his smoke-retractor, which received the
smoke near the top of the chimney, and brought it down to be burnt over
again, by which he computed that he saved five cords and a half of wood
in a year. The fire which dressed his victuals, pumped up, by means of a
steam engine, water for the kitchen turned one or more spits, as well as
two or three mills for grinding pepper, salt, &c.; and then, by a
spindle through the wall, worked a churn in the dairy, and cleaned the
knives: the forks, indeed, were still cleaned by hand; but he said he
did not despair of effecting this operation in time, by machinery. I
mentioned to him our contrivance of silver forks, to lessen this labour;
but he coldly remarked, that he imagined science was in its infancy
with us.
He informed us that he had been ten years in completing this ingenious
machine; and certainly, when it was in full operation, I never saw
exultation and delight so strongly depicted in any human face. The
various sounds and sights, that met the ear and eye, in rapid
succession, still farther worked on his feelings, and heightened his
raptures. There was such a simmering, and hissing, and bubbling of
boiled, and broiled, and fried--such a whirling, and jerking, and
creaking of wheels, and cranks, and pistons--such clouds of steam, and
vapours, and even smoke, notwithstanding all of the latter that was
burnt,--that I almost thought myself in some great manufactory.
After having suffered as much as we could well bear, from the heat and
confined air of this laboratory of eatables, and passed the proper
number of compliments on the skill and ingenuity they displayed, we
ascended to his hall, to partake of that feast, to prepare which we had
seen all the elements and the mechanical powers called into action.
There were a few of his city acquaintances present, besides ourselves:
but whether it was owing to the effect of the steam from the dishes on
our stomachs, or that this scientific cookery was not suited to our
unpractised palates, I know not, but we all made an indifferent repast,
except our host, who tasted every dish, and seemed to relish them all.
After sitting some time at table, conversing on the progress of science,
its splendid achievements, and the pleasing prospects which it yet dimly
showed in the future, our hospitable entertainer, perceiving we were
fatigued with the labours of the day, invited us to take our next
_lallaneae_, or sleep, with him, for which hospitality we felt very
grateful. We were then shown to a room, in which there were marks of the
same fertile invention, in saving labour and promoting convenience; but
we were too sleepy to take much notice of them. Our beds were filled
with air, which is quite as good as feathers, except that when the
leather covering gets a hole in it, from ripping, or other accidents, it
loses its elasticity with its air--an accident which happened to me this
very night; for a mouse having gnawed the leather where the housemaid's
greasy fingers had left a mark, I sunk gently down, not to soft repose,
but on the hard planks, where I uncomfortably lay until the bell warned
us to rise for breakfast.
As soon as I was dressed, I walked out into a large garden, and, as the
sun was not yet so high as to make it sultry, was enjoying the balmy
sweetness of the air, and the flowering shrubs, which in beauty and
fragrance almost exceeded those of India, when I saw a servant run by
the garden wall, enter the stable, and bring out a zebra. On inquiring
the cause, I was made to understand that our noble host was taken
suddenly ill. I immediately returned to the house, and found the
domestics running to and fro, and manifesting the greatest anxiety, as
well as hurry, in their looks. I went into the Brahmin's room, and found
him dressed. He went out, and after some time, informed me that our kind
host had a violent _cholera morbus_, in consequence of the various kinds
of food with which he had overloaded his stomach at dinner; that he
considered himself near his last end, and was endeavouring to arrange
his affairs for the event.
I could not help meditating on the melancholy uncertainty of human life,
when I contrasted the comforts, the pleasures, the pride of conscious
usefulness and genius felt by this gentleman a short time since, with
the agony which that trying and bitter hour brings to the stoutest and
most callous heart--when it must quit this state of being for another,
of which it knows so little, and over which fear and doubt throw a gloom
that hope cannot entirely dispel.