The first woman had _the end_ in view; the second did not look ahead
at all, but simply indulged her own selfishly animal instincts,
without a thought of what would be best for her child.
The apparently "good" mothers might be divided into two classes--the
animal mothers and the spiritual mothers. The animal mothers are
better than indifferent, and therefore abnormal, mothers, but are far
below spiritual mothers, for they, the animal mothers, are only
obeying natural instincts which have happily survived in them, but
obeying them only as animals do, without reason or conscience. And the
spiritual mother uses her common sense and tries to secure the
continual welfare of her child, looking ahead for all eventualities,
from matters of health to personal appearance, as well as character
training and soul elevation.
Numbers of women think that if they follow out the same lines of
bringing-up for their children as are the recognised ones employed by
their class they have fully done their duty, and that if the children
do not profit by the stereotyped lessons of religion and behaviour
that have been imparted to them by proper teachers it is the fault of
the children, and a misfortune which they, the mothers, must bear with
more or less resignation.
But indeed this is not so.
Let us take a spiritual mother's duties in rotation, beginning with
the most material. After bringing into the world the healthiest infant
her common sense has been able to secure, she should guard against any
physical disability accruing to it that she can prevent. In all
matters of health she should either make a great study of the subject
herself, or employ trained aid to its accomplishment; but beyond this
there are other things which, if she neglects them, the boy or girl
could reproach her for afterwards and with reason. One is the
fore-thought for beauty. How many boys' whole personal appearances are
ruined by standing-out ears! How many little girls' complexions are
irretrievably spoilt by unsuitable soap having been used which has
burnt red veins into their tender cheeks. These two small examples are
entirely the fault of the mother and do not lie at the door of
uncorrected habits in the children themselves. No boy's ears need
stick out; there are caps and every sort of contrivance yearly being
improved upon to obviate this disfigurement. No girl need have
anything but a beautiful skin if her mother uses intelligence and
supervises the early treatment of it. Because if she has _the end_ in
view, the mother will know that her little boy or girl will probably
grow up and desire affection and happiness, and that beauty is a means
not to be discounted to obtain these good things, and, for the
securing of them, is relatively as important as having a well-endowed
mind.