I received your bill upon Wiltshire, which was punctually honoured; but
as I don’t choose to keep so much cash by me, in a common lodging house,
I have deposited 250l. in the bank of Bath, and shall take their bills
for it in London, when I leave this place, where the season draws to an
end--You must know, that now being a-foot, I am resolved to give Liddy a
glimpse of London. She is one of the best hearted creatures I ever knew,
and gains upon my affection every day--As for Tabby, I have dropt such
hints to the Irish baronet, concerning her fortune, as, I make no doubt,
will cool the ardour of his addresses. Then her pride will take the
alarm; and the rancour of stale maidenhood being chafed, we shall hear
nothing but slander and abuse of Sir Ulic Mackilligut--This rupture,
I foresee, will facilitate our departure from Bath; where, at present,
Tabby seems to enjoy herself with peculiar satisfaction. For my part, I
detest it so much, that I should not have been able to stay so long in
the place if I had not discovered some old friends; whose conversation
alleviates my disgust--Going to the coffeehouse one forenoon, I
could not help contemplating the company, with equal surprize and
compassion--We consisted of thirteen individuals; seven lamed by the
gout, rheumatism, or palsy; three maimed by accident; and the rest
either deaf or blind. One hobbled, another hopped, a third dragged his
legs after him like a wounded snake, a fourth straddled betwixt a pair
of long crutches, like the mummy of a felon hanging in chains; a fifth
was bent into a horizontal position, like a mounted telescope, shoved in
by a couple of chairmen; and a sixth was the bust of a man, set upright
in a wheel machine, which the waiter moved from place to place.
Being struck with some of their faces, I consulted the
subscription-book; and, perceiving the names of several old friends,
began to consider the groupe with more attention. At length I discovered
rear-admiral Balderick, the companion of my youth, whom I had not seen
since he was appointed lieutenant of the Severn. He was metamorphosed
into an old man, with a wooden leg and a weatherbeaten face, which
appeared the more ancient from his grey locks, that were truly
venerable--Sitting down at the table, where he was reading a news-paper,
I gazed at him for some minutes, with a mixture of pleasure and regret,
which made my heart gush with tenderness; then, taking him by the hand,
‘Ah, Sam (said I) forty years ago I little thought’--I was too much
moved to proceed. ‘An old friend, sure enough! (cried he, squeezing my
hand, and surveying me eagerly through his glasses) I know the looming
of the vessel, though she has been hard strained since we parted; but I
can’t heave up the name’--The moment I told him who I was, he exclaimed,
‘Ha! Matt, my old fellow cruizer, still afloat!’ And, starting up,
hugged me in his arms. His transport, however, boded me no good; for, in
saluting me, he thrust the spring of his spectacles into my eye, and,
at the same time, set his wooden stump upon my gouty toe; an attack that
made me shed tears in sad earnest--After the hurry of our recognition
was over, he pointed out two of our common friends in the room: the bust
was what remained of colonel Cockril, who had lost the use of his
limbs in making an American campaign; and the telescope proved to be
my college chum, sir Reginald Bently; who, with his new title, and
unexpected inheritance, commenced fox-hunter, without having served
his apprenticeship to the mystery; and, in consequence of following the
hounds through a river, was seized with an inflammation of his bowels,
which has contracted him into his present attitude.
Our former correspondence was forthwith renewed, with the most hearty
expressions of mutual good-will, and as we had met so unexpectedly, we
agreed to dine together that very day at the tavern. My friend Quin,
being luckily unengaged, obliged us with his company; and, truly, this
the most happy day I have passed these twenty years. You and I, Lewis,
having been always together, never tasted friendship in this high gout,
contracted from long absence. I cannot express the half of what I felt
at this casual meeting of three or four companions, who had been so
long separated, and so roughly treated by the storms of life. It was a
renovation of youth; a kind of resuscitation of the dead, that realized
those interesting dreams, in which we sometimes retrieve our ancient
friends from the grave. Perhaps my enjoyment was not the less pleasing
for being mixed with a strain of melancholy, produced by the remembrance
of past scenes, that conjured up the ideas of some endearing connexions,
which the hand of Death has actually dissolved.
The spirits and good humour of the company seemed to triumph over the
wreck of their constitutions. They had even philosophy enough to
joke upon their own calamities; such is the power of friendship, the
sovereign cordial of life--I afterwards found, however, that they were
not without their moments, and even hours of disquiet. Each of them
apart, in succeeding conferences, expatiated upon his own particular
grievances; and they were all malcontents at bottom--Over and above
their personal disasters, they thought themselves unfortunate in the
lottery of life. Balderick complained, that all the recompence he
had received for his long and hard service, was the half-pay of a
rear-admiral. The colonel was mortified to see himself over-topped by
upstart generals, some of whom he had once commanded; and, being a man
of a liberal turn, could ill put up with a moderate annuity, for which
he had sold his commission. As for the baronet, having run himself
considerably in debt, on a contested election, he has been obliged to
relinquish his seat in parliament, and his seat in the country at the
same time, and put his estate to nurse; but his chagrin, which is the
effect of his own misconduct, does not affect me half so much as that of
the other two, who have acted honourable and distinguished parts on the
great theatre, and are now reduced to lead a weary life in this stew-pan
of idleness and insignificance. They have long left off using the
waters, after having experienced their inefficacy. The diversions of the
place they are not in a condition to enjoy. How then do they make shift
to pass their time? In the forenoon they crawl out to the Rooms or
the coffeehouse, where they take a hand at whist, or descant upon the
General Advertiser; and their evenings they murder in private parties,
among peevish invalids, and insipid old women--This is the case with
a good number of individuals, whom nature seems to have intended for
better purposes.
About a dozen years ago, many decent families, restricted to small
fortunes, besides those that came hither on the score of health, were
tempted to settle at Bath, where they could then live comfortably, and
even make a genteel appearance, at a small expence: but the madness of
the times has made the place too hot for them, and they are now obliged
to think of other migrations--Some have already fled to the mountains
of Wales, and others have retired to Exeter. Thither, no doubt, they
will be followed by the flood of luxury and extravagance, which will
drive them from place to place to the very Land’s End; and there, I
suppose, they will be obliged to ship themselves to some other country.
Bath is become a mere sink of profligacy and extortion. Every article of
house-keeping is raised to an enormous price; a circumstance no longer
to be wondered at, when we know that every petty retainer of fortune
piques himself upon keeping a table, and thinks it is for the honour
of his character to wink at the knavery of his servants, who are in a
confederacy with the market-people; and, of consequence, pay whatever
they demand. Here is now a mushroom of opulence, who pays a cook seventy
guineas a week for furnishing him with one meal a day. This portentous
frenzy is become so contagious, that the very rabble and refuse of
mankind are infected. I have known a negro-driver, from Jamaica, pay
over-night, to the master of one of the rooms, sixty-five guineas for
tea and coffee to the company, and leave Bath next morning, in such
obscurity, that not one of his guests had the slightest idea of his
person, or even made the least inquiry about his name. Incidents of this
kind are frequent; and every day teems with fresh absurdities, which are
too gross to make a thinking man merry.
--But I feel the spleen creeping on me apace; and therefore will indulge
you with a cessation, that you may have no unnecessary cause to curse
your correspondence with,
Dear Dick, Yours ever, MAT. BRAMBLE BATH, May 5.
To Miss LAETITIA WILLIS, at Gloucester.