My God, my God, I find in thy book that fear is a stifling spirit, a
spirit of suffocation; that _Ishbosheth could not speak, nor reply in
his own defence to Abner, because he was afraid_.[70] It was thy servant
Job's case too, who, before he could say anything to thee, says of thee,
_Let him take his rod away from me, and let not his fear terrify me,
then would I speak with him, and not fear him; but it is not so with
me_.[71] Shall a fear of thee take away my devotion to thee? Dost thou
command me to speak to thee, and command me to fear thee; and do these
destroy one another? There is no perplexity in thee, my God; no
inextricableness in thee, my light and my clearness, my sun and my moon,
that directest me as well in the night of adversity and fear, as in my
day of prosperity and confidence. I must then speak to thee at all
times, but when must I fear thee? At all times too. When didst thou
rebuke any petitioner with the name of importunate? Thou hast proposed
to us a parable of a judge[72] that did justice at last, because the
client was importunate, and troubled him; but thou hast told us plainly,
that thy use in that parable was not that thou wast troubled with our
importunities, but (as thou sayest there) _that we should always pray_.
And to the same purpose thou proposest another,[73] that if I press my
friend, when he is in bed at midnight, to lend me bread, though he will
not rise because I am his friend, yet because of mine importunity he
will. God will do this whensoever thou askest, and never call it
importunity. Pray in thy bed at midnight, and God will not say, I will
hear thee to-morrow upon thy knees, at thy bedside; pray upon thy knees
there then, and God will not say, I will hear thee on Sunday at church;
God is no dilatory God, no froward God; prayer is never unseasonable,
God is never asleep, nor absent. But, O my God, can I do this, and fear
thee; come to thee and speak to thee, in all places, at all hours, and
fear thee? Dare I ask this question? There is more boldness in the
question than in the coming; I may do it though I fear thee; I cannot do
it except I fear thee. So well hast thou provided that we should always
fear thee, as that thou hast provided that we should fear no person but
thee, nothing but thee; no men? No. Whom? _The Lord is my help and my
salvation, whom shall I fear?_[74] Great enemies? Not great enemies, for
no enemies are great to them that fear thee. _Fear not the people of
this land, for they are bread to you_;[75] they shall not only not eat
us, not eat our bread, but they shall be our bread. Why should we fear
them? But for all this metaphorical bread, victory over enemies that
thought to devour us, may we not fear, that we may lack bread literally?
And fear famine, though we fear not enemies? _Young lions do lack and
suffer hunger, but they that seek the Lord shall not want any good
thing._[76] Never? Though it be well with them at one time, may they not
fear that it may be worse? _Wherefore should I fear in the days of
evil?_[77] says thy servant David. Though his own sin had made them
evil, he feared them not. No? not if this evil determine in death? Not
though in a death; not though in a death inflicted by violence, by
malice, by our own desert; _fear not the sentence of death_,[78] if thou
fear God. Thou art, O my God, so far from admitting us that fear thee to
fear others, as that thou makest others to fear us; as _Herod feared
John, because he was a holy and a just man, and observed him_.[79] How
fully then, O my abundant God, how gently, O my sweet, my easy God, dost
thou unentangle me in any scruple arising out of the consideration of
thy fear! Is not this that which thou intendest when thou sayest, _The
secret of the Lord is with them that fear him_;[80] the secret, the
mystery of the right use of fear. Dost thou not mean this when thou
sayest, _we shall understand the fear of the Lord_?[81] Have it, and
have benefit by it; have it, and stand under it; be directed by it, and
not be dejected with it. And dost thou not propose that church for our
example when thou sayest, the church of Judea _walked in the fear of
God_;[82] they had it, but did not sit down lazily, nor fall down
weakly, nor sink under it. There is a fear which weakens men in the
service of God. _Adam was afraid, because he was naked._[83] They who
have put off thee are a prey to all. They may fear, for _Thou wilt laugh
when their fear comes upon them_, as thou hast told them more than
once.[84] And thou wilt make them fear where no cause of fear is, as
thou hast told them more than once too.[85] There is a fear that is a
punishment of former wickednesses, and induces more. Though some said of
thy Son, Christ Jesus, _that he was a good man, yet no man spake openly
for fear of the Jews_. Joseph was his disciple, _but secretly, for fear
of the Jews_.[86] The disciples kept some meetings, but with doors shut
for fear of the Jews. O my God, thou givest us fear for ballast to carry
us steadily in all weathers. But thou wouldst ballast us with such sand
as should have gold in it, with that fear which is thy fear; for _the
fear of the Lord is his treasure_.[87] He that hath that lacks nothing
that man can have, nothing that God does give. Timorous men thou
rebukest: _Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?_[88] Such thou
dismissest from thy service with scorn, though of them there went from
Gideon's army twenty-two thousand, and remained but ten thousand.[89]
Such thou sendest farther than so; thither from whence they never
return: _The fearful and the unbelieving, into that burning lake which
is the second death_.[90] There is a fear and there is a hope, which are
equal abominations to thee; for, they were confounded because they
hoped,[91] says thy servant Job; because they had misplaced, miscentred
their hopes, they hoped, and not in thee, and such shall fear, and not
fear thee. But in thy fear, my God, and my fear, my God, and my hope, is
hope, and love, and confidence, and peace, and every limb and ingredient
of happiness enwrapped; for joy includes all, and fear and joy consist
together, nay, constitute one another. _The women departed from the
sepulchre_,[92] the women who were made supernumerary apostles, apostles
to the apostles; mothers of the church, and of the fathers, grandfathers
of the church, the apostles themselves; the women, angels of the
resurrection, went from the sepulchre with fear and joy; they ran, says
the text, and they ran upon those two legs, fear and joy; and both was
the right leg; they joy in thee, O Lord, that fear thee, and fear thee
only, who feel this joy in thee. Nay, thy fear, and thy love are
inseparable; still we are called upon, in infinite places, to fear God,
yet the commandment, which is the root of all is, Thou shalt love the
Lord thy God; he doeth neither that doeth not both; he omits neither,
that does one. Therefore when thy servant David had said that _the fear
of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom_,[93] and his son had repeated it
again,[94] he that collects both calls this fear the root of wisdom;
and, that it may embrace all, he calls it wisdom itself.[95] A wise man,
therefore, is never without it, never without the exercise of it;
therefore thou sentest Moses to thy people, _that they might learn to
fear thee all the days of their lives_,[96] not in heavy and calamitous,
but in good and cheerful days too; for Noah, who had assurance of his
deliverance, yet, _moved with fear, prepared an ark, for the saving of
his house_.[97] _A wise man will fear in everything._[98] And therefore,
though I pretend to no other degree of wisdom, I am abundantly rich in
this, that I lie here possessed with that fear which is thy fear, both
that this sickness is thy immediate correction, and not merely a natural
accident, and therefore fearful, because it is a fearful thing to fall
into thy hands; and that this fear preserves me from all inordinate
fear, arising out of the infirmity of nature, because thy hand being
upon me, thou wilt never let me fall out of thy hand.