PICAROON
Plucking peremptorily at her cloak, Lyttleton drew the girl to him
and, seizing her hand, without further ceremony dragged her round the
clump of shrubbery to a spot secure from observation.
She submitted without a hint of resistance. But she was trembling
violently, and the contact with his hand was as fire to her blood.
Pausing, he stared and laughed uncertainly.
"Of all people!" he said in an undertone. "I never for an instant
thought of you!"
Controlling her voice tolerably, she asked directly: "How did you get
up again without my seeing you?"
"Simply enough--by the steps of the place next door. I saw you
watching me--saw your head over the edge of the landing, black against
the sky--and knew I'd never know who it was, unless by strategy. So I
came up the other way and cut across to head you off."
He added, after a pause, with a semi-apologetic air: "What do you mean
by it, anyway'?"
"What--?"
"Watching me this way--spying on me--?"
"But I didn't mean to. I was as surprised to see you as you were, just
now, to see me."
"Honestly?"
His eyes searched hers suspiciously. Flushing, she endeavoured to
assume some little dignity--drew up, lifted her chin, resumed
possession of her hand.
"Of course," she said in an injured voice.
"Sure Mrs.--sure nobody sent you to spy on me?"
"Mr. Lyttleton!"
"I want to believe you."
"You've no right not to!"
"But what, will you tell me, are you doing out here this time of
night?"
"I came out because I wanted to--I was restless, couldn't sleep."
He reflected upon this doubtfully. "Funny freak," he remarked.
"You're impertinent!"
"I don't mean to be. Forgive me. I'm only puzzled--"
"So am I puzzled," she retorted with spirit. "Suppose you tell me what
you're doing out here at this time of night--down on the
beach--anxious to escape notice. If you ask me, I call that a funnier
freak than mine!"
"Quite so," he agreed soberly; "and a very reasonable retort. Only I
can't tell you. It's--er--a private matter."
"So I presumed--"
"Look here, Miss Manwaring; this is a serious business with me. Give
me your word---"
"What makes that essential? Why do you think I'd lie--to you '?"
It was just that little quaver prefacing her last two words which
precipitated the affair. Otherwise a question natural enough under the
circumstances would have proved innocuous. But for the life of her she
could not control her voice; on those simple words it broke; and so
the question became confession--confession, accusation and challenge
all in, one.
It created first a pause, an instant of breathless suspense, while
Lyttleton stared in doubt and Sally steeled herself, with an effect of
trembling, reluctant, upon the brink of some vast mystery.
Then: "To me?" he said slowly. "You mean me to understand you might
lie to another-but not to me?"
Her response was little better than a gasp: "You know it!"
He acknowledged this with half a nod; he knew it well, too well.
Now she must have seemed very lovely to the man in that moment of
defiance. She saw his eyes lighten with a singular flash, saw his face
darken suddenly in the paling moonlight, and heard the sharp sibilance
of his indrawn breath.
And whether or not it was so, she fancied the wind had fallen, that
the night was hushed once more, and now more profoundly than it had
ever been, as though the very world were standing still in
anticipation.
She heard him cry, almost angrily: "Oh, damn it, I must not!"
And with that she was in his arms, sobbing, panting, going to heaven
against his lips. . . .
Then fell a lull. She was conscious that his embrace relaxed a trifle,
heard the murmur of his consternation: "Oh, this is madness, madness!"
But when she tried to release herself his arms tightened.
"No!" he said thickly, "not now--not after this. Don't. I love you!"
She braced her hands against his breast, struggled, thrust him away
from her, found herself free at last.
"You don't!" she sobbed miserably; "You don't love me. Don't lie to
me! Let me go!"
"Why do you say that? You love me, and I--"
"Don't say it! It isn't true! I know. I threw myself at your head.
What else could you do? You care nothing about me; to you I'm just one
more silly woman. No; let me be, please! You do not love me--you
don't, you don't, you don't!"
He shrugged, relinquished his effort to recapture her, muttered
uncertainly: "Blessed if I know!"
Recovering a little, she drew her hands swiftly across face and eyes
that still burned with his kisses.
"Oh!" she cried brokenly, "why did you--why did I--?"
"What's the good of asking that? It's done now," he argued with a
touch of aggrieved resentment. "I didn't mean--I meant to--I don't
know what I meant. Only--never this."
He took an impatient stride or two in the shelter of the shadow,
turned back to her, expostulant: "It's too bad! I'd have given
worlds--"
"But now I've gone and done it!" she retorted bitterly. In chagrin,
her own indignation mounted. "It is too bad, poor Mr. Lyttleton!"
That was too much; he came closer and grasped her wrist. "Why do you
talk that way to me?" he demanded wrathfully. "What have I done--?"
"You? Nothing!" she broke in, roughly wrenching her hand free in a
fury of humiliation. "Do you ever do anything? Isn't the woman always
the aggressor? Never your fault--of course not! But don't,
please, worry; I shan't ever remind you. You're quite free to go and
forget what's happened as quickly as you like!"
She scrubbed the knuckles of one hand roughly across her quivering
lips. "Forget!" she cried. "Oh, if only I might ever . . . But that's
my penance, the mortification of remembering how I took advantage of
the chivalry of a man who didn't care for me--and couldn't!"
"You don't know that," Lyttleton retorted.
Provoked to imprudence by this sudden contrariety, this strange
inconsistence, he made a futile attempt to regain her hand. "Don't be
foolish. Can't you see I'm crazy about you?"
"Oh, yes!" she laughed, contemptuous.
"You're no fool," he declared hotly. "You know well you can't--a woman
like you--play with a man like me as if he were a child. I tell you
I--"
He checked himself with a firm hand; since, it seemed, she was one who
took such matters seriously. "I'm mad about you," he repeated in a
more subdued tone, "and I'd give anything if . . . Only . . . the
deuce of it is, I can't . . ."
"You can't afford to!" she snapped him up. "Oh, I understand you
perfectly. Didn't I warn you I was penniless? You can't afford to love
a penniless Nobody, can you--a shop-girl masquerading in
borrowed finery! No--please don't look so incredulous; you must have
guessed. Anyway, that's all I am, or was--a shop-girl out of
work--before I was brought here to be Mrs. Gosnold's secretary. And
that's all I'll be to-morrow, or as soon as ever she learns that I way
lay her men guests at all hours and--steal their kisses!"
"She won't learn that from me," said Lyttleton, "not if you hold your
tongue."
She drew back a pace, as though he had made to strike her, and for a
moment was speechless, staring into the new countenance he showed
her--the set, cold mask of the insolent, conquering male. And chagrin
ate at her heart like an acid, so that inwardly she writhed with the
pain of it.
"I--!" she breathed, incredulous. "I hold my tongue! Oh! Do you think
for an instant I'm anxious to advertise my ignominy?"
"It's a bargain, then?" he suggested coolly. "For my part, I don't
mind admitting I'd much rather it didn't ever become known that I,
too, was--let's say--troubled with insomnia to-night. But if you say
nothing, and I say nothing--why, of course--there's not much I
wouldn't do for you, my dear!"
After a little she said quietly: "Of course I deserved this. But I'm
glad now it turned out the way it has. Two minutes ago I was wild with
the shame of making myself so cheap as to let you--of being
such a fool as to dream you would lower yourself to the level of a
woman not what you'd call your social equal, who could so far forget
her dignity as to let you see she cared for you. But, of course, since
I am not that--your peer--but only a shop-girl, I'm glad it's
happened. Because now I understand some things better--you, for
example. I understand you very well now--too well!"
She laughed quietly to his dashed countenance: "Oh, I'm cured, no
fear!" and turned as if to leave him.
He proved, however, unexpectedly loath to let her go.
Such spirit was not altogether new in his experience, but it wasn't
every day one met a girl who had it; whatever her social status, here
was rare fire--or the promise of it. Nor had he undervalued her; he
had suspected as much from the very first; connoisseur that he was,
his flair had not deceived him.
His lips tightened, his eyes glimmered ominously.
And she was, in a way, at his mercy. If what she said of herself were
true, he need only speak a word and she would be as good as thrown
out. Even Abigail Gosnold couldn't protect her, insist on people
inviting a shop-girl to their houses. And if such drudgery were really
what she had come up from, you might be sure she'd break her
heart rather than forfeit all this that she had gained.
And then again she had been all for him from the very first. She had
admitted as much out of her own mouth. Her own mouth, for that matter,
had taken his kisses--and hungrily, or he was no judge of kissing.
Only the surprise of it, his own dumb unreadiness, his unwonted lack
of ingenuity and diplomatics had almost lost her to him. Not quite,
however; it was not yet too late; and though the risk was great, the
penalty heavy if he were discovered pursuing an affair under this
roof, the game was well worth the candle.
Thus Mr. Lyttleton to his conscience; and thus it happened that, when
she turned to go, he stepped quickly to her side and said quietly:
"Oh, please, my dear--one minute."
The unexpected humility of his tone, mixed with the impudence of that
term of endearment, so struck her that she hesitated despite the
counsel of a sound intuition.
"We mustn't part this way--misunderstanding one another," he insisted,
ignoring the hostility in her attitude and modulating his voice to a
tone whose potency often had been proved. "Three words can set me
right with you, if you'll only listen--"
She said frostily: "Well?"
"Three words." He drew still nearer. "I've said them once
to-night. Will you hear them again? No--please listen! I meant what I
said, but I was carried out of myself--clumsy--bungled my meaning. You
misunderstood, misconstrued, and before I could correct you I'd lost
my temper. You said cruel things--just enough, no doubt, from your
point of view--and you put words into my mouth, read thoughts into my
mind that never were there. And I let you do me that injustice because
I'm hot-tempered. And then, I'm not altogether a free agent; I'm not
my own master, quite; and that's difficult to explain. If I could make
you understand--"
Grown a little calmer, she couldn't deny there was something
reasonable in his argument. She really had given him little chance;
impulse and instinct had worked upon her, causing her to jump at
conclusions which, however well founded in fact, were without excuse
in act. If he had kissed her, it wasn't without provocation, nor
against her will; she had got no more than she asked for. The trouble
was, she no longer wanted it. She had been the dupe of her own folly,
by her own romantic bent and the magnetism of the man blinded to the
essentially meretricious spirit clothed in the flesh of his engaging
person.
It had been a simple and perhaps inevitable infatuation of a mind all
too ready to be infatuated, needing heroic treatment--such as she'd
had and blushed to remember--to cure. And the shock of waking
from that mad dream, no less than the shock of physical contact, had
made her frantic and unreasonable. She could but admit that and,
admitting it, be generous enough to let him clear himself.
If only he would not insist on his declaration of love, that she knew
to be untrue, as if the compliment of it must be a balm to a spirit as
bruised as her own!
He went on: "And all this because I seemed to hesitate--because I did
hesitate, knowing I couldn't say all I wanted to. And before I could
explain--"
"You're not married?" she inquired with an absence of emotion that
should have warned him.
"Of course not. But I'm dependent, and good for nothing in a business
way. My income is from my family, and depends on their favour. What
can I say? I love you--I do--on my soul, I do!"
He put his arms once more round her shoulders, and she did not resist
him, but none the less held her head up and back, eying him steadily.
"I love you desperately, but I can't ask you to marry me until I get
the permission of my family. Till then . . . is there any reason . . .?
Be kind to me, be sweet to me, O sweetest of women! I'm mad, mad
about you!"
With no more warning he lowered his head, fastening his lips to
the curve of her throat; and discovered suddenly and definitely his
error. In a twinkling it was a savage animal he held in his arms, and
before he knew what was happening she had broken his grasp and he was
reeling back with a head that rang from the impact of an open hand
upon his ear.
"You shrew!" he chattered. "You infernal little vixen! And I
thought--!"
He sprang toward her, beside himself, with a purpose that failed only
through the intervention of a third party.
A man swinging suddenly round the end of the hedge shouldered between
Lyttleton and the object of his rage--a man whose bulk, in the loose
flannels of a lounge suit, seemed double that of Lyttleton.
"Oh, here!" said Trego impatiently, but without raising his voice.
"Come, come!" He caught Lyttleton's wrists and forced them down.
"Don't be an idiot--as well as a cad. Do you want to rouse the
household? If you do, and get kicked out, you'll never get another
chance on this island, my friend."
"Damn your impudence!" Lyttleton stuttered, sufficiently recalled to
his senses to guard his tone, and wrenched at his wrists. "Let me go!
I'll--"
"Sure I'll let you go," Trego agreed cheerfully. "But unless you want
a thrashing in the presence of a lady, you'll do nothing foolish."
With this he released Mr. Lyttleton in such wise that he was an
instant later picking himself up from the gravel path.
And while he was picking himself up he was also reflecting swiftly,
this notwithstanding that Sally was no longer present to be a stay
upon their brawling.
If his look was vicious, his tone was subdued as he stood brushing off
the dust of his downfall.
"Lucky you came when you did," he said, with an effort to seem
composed. "I presume I ought to thank you for knocking me about. This
confounded temper of mine will get me into serious trouble yet if I'm
not careful. I was driven pretty nearly wild by that little devil--"
"Cut it right there!" Trego interrupted sharply. "I don't know
anything about your row--didn't hear a word that passed between you
two--and it's none of my business. But if there's any blame to be
borne, you'd better shoulder it yourself, for I warn you, I'm not
going to hear any woman called names by a pup like you!"