EVELINA TO THE REV. MR. VILLARS Holborn, June 17th.
YESTERDAY Mr. Smith carried his point of making a party for Vauxhall,
consisting of Madame Duval, M. Du Bois, all the Branghtons, Mr. Brown,
himself,-and me!-for I find all endeavours vain to escape any thing
which these people desire I should not.
There were twenty disputes previous to our setting out; first, as to
the time of our going: Mr. Branghton, his son, and young Brown, were
for six o'clock; and all the ladies and Mr. Smith were for eight;-the
latter, however, conquered.
Then, as to the way we should go; some were for a boat, others for
a coach, and Mr. Branghton himself was for walking; but the boat
at length was decided upon. Indeed this was the only part of the
expedition that was agreeable to me; for the Thames was delightfully
pleasant.
The garden is very pretty, but too formal; I should have been better
pleased, had it consisted less of straight walks, where
Grove nods at grove, each alley has its brother.
The trees, the numerous lights, and the company in the circle round
the orchestra make a most brilliant and gay appearance; and had I been
with a party less disagreeable to me, I should have thought it a place
formed for animation and pleasure. There was a concert; in the course
of which a hautbois concerto was so charmingly played, that I could
have thought myself upon enchanted ground, had I had spirits more
gentle to associate with. The hautbois in the open air is heavenly.
Mr. Smith endeavoured to attach himself to me, with such officious
assiduity and impertinent freedom, that he quite sickened me. Indeed
M. Du Bois was the only man of the party to whom, voluntarily, I
ever addressed myself. He is civil and respectful, and I have found
nobody else so since I left Howard Grove. His English is very bad;
but I prefer it to speaking French myself, which I dare not venture
to do. I converse with him frequently, both to disengage myself from
others, and to oblige Madame Duval, who is always pleased when he is
attended to.
As we were walking about the orchestra, I heard a bell ring; and,
in a moment, Mr. Smith, flying up to me, caught my hand, and, with a
motion too quick to be resisted, ran away with me many yards before I
had breath to ask his meaning, though I struggled as well as I could,
to get from him. At last, however, I insisted upon stopping: "Stopping,
Ma'am!" cried he, "why we must run on or we shall lose the cascade!"
And then again he hurried me away, mixing with a crowd of people,
all running with so much velocity, that I could not imagine what had
raised such an alarm. We were soon followed by the rest of the party;
and my surprise and ignorance proved a source of diversion to them
all, which was not exhausted the whole evening. Young Branghton,
in particular, laughed till he could hardly stand.
The scene of the cascade I thought extremely pretty, and the general
effect striking and lively.
But this was not the only surprise which was to divert them at my
expense; for they led me about the garden purposely to enjoy my first
sight of various other deceptions.
About ten o'clock, Mr. Smith having chosen a box in a very conpicuous
place, we all went to supper. Much fault was found with every thing
that was ordered, though not a morsel of any thing was left; and the
dearness of the provisions, with conjectures upon what profit was
made by them, supplied discourse during the whole meal.
When wine and cyder were brought, Mr. Smith said, "Now let's enjoy
ourselves; now is the time, or never. Well, Ma'am, and how do you
like Vauxhall?"
"Like it!" cried young Branghton; "why, how can she help liking
it? she has never seen such a place before, that I'll answer for."
"For my part," said Miss Branghton, "I like it because it is not
vulgar."
"This must have been a fine treat for you, Miss," said Mr. Branghton;
"why, I suppose you was never so happy in all your life before?"
I endeavoured to express my satisfaction with some pleasure; yet,
I believe, they were much amazed at my coldness.
"Miss ought to stay in town till the last night," said young Branghton;
"and then, it's my belief, she'd say something to it! Why, Lord,
it's the best night of any; there's always a riot,-and there the folks
run about,-and then there's such squealing and squalling!-and, there,
all the lamps are broke,-and the women run skimper scamper.-I declare
I would not take five guineas to miss the last night!"
I was very glad when they all grew tired of sitting, and called for
the waiter to pay the bill. The Miss Branghtons said they would walk
on while the gentlemen settled the account, and asked me to accompany
them; which, however, I declined.
"You girls may do as you please," said Madame Duval; "but as to me,
I promise you, I sha'n't go nowhere without the gentlemen."
"No more, I suppose, will my cousin," said Miss Branghton, looking
reproachfully towards Mr. Smith.
This reflection, which I feared would flatter his vanity, made me most
unfortunately request Madame Duval's permission to attend them. She
granted it; and away we went, having promised to meet in the room.
To the room, therefore, I would immediately have gone: but the sisters
agreed that they would first have a little pleasure; and they tittered
and talked so loud, that they attracted universal notice.
"Lord, Polly," said the eldest, "suppose we were to take a turn in
the dark walks!"
"Aye, do," answered she; "and then we'll hide ourselves, and then
Mr. Brown will think we are lost."
I remonstrated very warmly against this plan, telling them it would
endanger our missing the rest of the party all the evening.
"O dear," cried Miss Branghton, "I thought how uneasy Miss would be
without a beau!"
This impertinence I did not think worth answering; and, quite by
compulsion, I followed them down a long alley, in which there was
hardly any light.
By the time we came near the end, a large party of gentlemen,
apparently very riotous, and who were hallooing, leaning on one
another, and laughing immoderately, seemed to rush suddenly from
behind some trees, and meeting us face to face, put their arms at
their sides, and formed a kind of circle, which first stopped our
proceeding, and then our retreating, for we were presently entirely
enclosed. The Miss Branghtons screamed aloud, and I was frightened
exceedingly; our screams were answered with bursts of laughter, and
for some minutes we were kept prisoners, till at last one of them,
rudely seizing hold of me, said I was a pretty little creature.
Terrified to death, I struggled with such vehemence to disengage
myself from him, that I succeeded, in spite of his efforts to detain
me; and immediately, and with a swiftness which fear only could have
given me, I flew rather than ran up the walk, hoping to secure my
safety by returning to the lights and company we had so foolishly
left: but before I could possibly accomplish my purpose, I was met
by another party of men, one of whom placed himself so directly in
my way, calling out, "Whither so fast, my love?"-that I could only
have proceeded by running into his arms.
In a moment both my hands, by different persons, were caught hold of,
and one of them, in a most familiar manner, desired, when I ran next,
to accompany me in a race; while the rest of the party stood still
and laughed.
I was almost distracted with terror, and so breathless with running,
that I could not speak; till another, advancing, said, I was as
handsome as an angel, and desired to be of the party. I then just
articulated, "For Heaven's sake, gentlemen, let me pass!"
Another then rushing suddenly forward, exclaimed, "Heaven and
earth! What voice is that?-"
"The voice of the prettiest little actress I have seen this age,"
answered one of my persecutors.
"No,-no,-no-" I panted out, "I am no actress-pray let me go,-pray
let me pass-"
"By all that's sacred," cried the same voice, which I then knew for
Sir Clement Willoughby's, "'tis herself!"
"Sir Clement Willoughby!" cried I. "O, Sir, assist-assist me-or I
shall die with terror!"
"Gentlemen," cried he, disengaging them all from me in an instant,
"pray leave this lady to me."
Loud laughs proceeded from every mouth, and two or three said
Willoughby has all the luck! But one of them, in a passionate manner,
vowed he would not give me up, for that he had the first right to me,
and would support it.
"You are mistaken," said Sir Clement, "this lady is-I will explain
myself to you another time; but, I assure you, you are all mistaken."
And then taking my willing hand, he led me off, amidst the loud
acclamations, laughter, and gross merriment of his impertinent
companions.
As soon as we had escaped from them, Sir Clement, with a voice of
surprise, exclaimed, "My dearest creature, what wonder, what strange
revolution, has brought you to such a place as this?"
Ashamed of my situation, and extremely mortified to be thus recognized
by him, I was for some time silent; and when he repeated his question,
only stammered out, "I have,-I hardly know how,-lost from my party-"
He caught my hand, and eagerly pressing it, in a passionate voice said,
"O that I had sooner met with thee!"
Surprised at a freedom so unexpected, I angrily broke from him, saying,
"Is this the protection you give me, Sir Clement?"
And then I saw, what the perturbation of my mind had prevented my
sooner noticing, that he had led me, though I know not how, into
another of the dark alleys, instead of the place whither I meant to go.
"Good God!" I cried, "where am I?-What way are you going?"
"Where," answered he, "we shall be least observed!"
Astonished at this speech, I stopped short, and declared I would go
no further.
"And why not, my angel?" again endeavouring to take my hand.
My heart beat with resentment; I pushed him away from me with all my
strength, and demanded how he dared treat me with such insolence?
"Insolence!" repeated he.
"Yes, Sir Clement, insolence; from you, who know me, I had a claim
for protection,-not to such treatment as this."
"By Heaven," cried he, with warmth, "you distract me;-why, tell
me,-why do I see you here?-Is this a place for Miss Anville?-these
dark walks!-no party! no companion!-by all that's good I can scarce
believe my senses!"
Extremely offended at this speech, I turned angrily from him: and,
not deigning to make any answer, walked on towards that part of the
garden whence I perceived the lights and company.
He followed me; but we were both some time silent.
"So you will not explain to me your situation?" said he, at length.
"No, Sir," answered I, disdainfully.
"Nor yet-suffer me to make my own interpretation?-"
I could not bear this strange manner of speaking; it made my very
soul shudder,-and I burst into tears.
He flew to me, and actually flung himself at my feet, as if
regardless who might see him, saying, "O, Miss Anville,-loveliest of
women,-forgive my,-my,-I beseech you forgive me;-if I have offended-if
I have hurt you-I could kill myself at the thought!-"
"No matter, Sir, no matter," cried I; "if I can but find my friends,-I
will never speak to-never see you again!"
"Good God!-good Heaven! My dearest life, what is it I have done?-what
is it I have said?-"
"You best know, Sir, what and why: but don't hold me here,-let me be
gone; and do you!"
"Not till you forgive me!-I cannot part with you in anger."
"For shame, for shame, Sir!" cried I, indignantly, "do you suppose I
am to be thus compelled?-do you take advantage of the absence of my
friends to affront me?"
"No, Madam," cried he, rising: "I would sooner forfeit my life than
act so mean a part. But you have flung me into amazement unspeakable,
and you will not condescend to listen to my request of giving me
some explanation."
"The manner, Sir," said I, "in which you spoke that request, made,
and will make, me scorn to answer it."
"Scorn!-I will own to you, I expected not such displeasure from
Miss Anville."
"Perhaps, Sir, if you had, you would less voluntarily have merited it."
"My dearest life, surely it must be known to you, that the man does
not breathe who adores you so passionately, so fervently, so tenderly
as I do!-Why, then, will you delight in perplexing me?-in keeping me
in suspense?-in torturing me with doubt?"
"I, Sir, delight in perplexing you!-you are much mistaken.-Your
suspense, your doubts, your perplexities,-are of your own creating;
and believe me, Sir, they may offend, but they can never delight
me:-but as you have yourself raised, you must yourself satisfy them."
"Good God!-that such haughtiness and such sweetness can inhabit the
same mansion!"
I made no answer; but quickening my pace I walked on silently and
sullenly, till this most impetuous of men, snatching my hand, which he
grasped with violence, besought me to forgive him with such earnestness
of supplication, that, merely to escape his importunities, I was forced
to speak, and in some measure to grant the pardon he requested; though
it was accorded with a very ill grace: but, indeed, I knew not how
to resist the humility of his intreaties: yet never shall I recollect
the occasion he gave me of displeasure, without feeling it renewed.
We now soon arrived in the midst of the general crowd; and, my own
safety being then insured, I grew extremely uneasy for the Miss
Branghtons, whose danger, however imprudently incurred by their own
folly, I too well knew how to tremble for. To this consideration all
my pride of heart yielded, and I determined to seek my party with the
utmost speed; though not without a sigh did I recollect the fruitless
attempt I had made after the opera, of concealing from this man my
unfortunate connections, which I was now obliged to make known.
I hastened, therefore, to the room, with a view of sending young
Branghton to the aid of his sisters. In a very short time I perceived
Madame Duval, and the rest, looking at one of the paintings.
I must own to you honestly, my dear Sir, that an involuntary repugnance
seized me at presenting such a set to Sir Clement,-he who had been used
to see me in parties so different!-My pace slackened as I approached
them,-but they presently perceived me.
"Ah, Mademoiselle!" cried M. Du Bois, "Que je suis charm-e; de vous
voir!"
"Pray, Miss," cried Mr. Brown, "where's Miss Polly?"
"Why, Miss, you've been a long while gone," said Mr. Branghton;
"we thought you'd been lost. But what have you done with your cousins?"