The unhappy stranger, who had risen at my entrance, again seated
himself; and though his head leant towards his book, I could not help
observing, his eyes were most intently and earnestly turned towards me.
M. Du Bois, as well as his broken English would allow him, endeavoured
to entertain us till the return of Miss Branghton and her brother.
"Lord, how tired I am!" cried the former; "I have not a foot to stand
upon." And, then, without any ceremony, she flung herself into the
chair from which I had risen to receive her.
"You tired!" said the brother; "why, then, what must I be, that have
walked twice as far?" And, with equal politeness, he paid the same
compliment to M. Du Bois which his sister had done to me.
Two chairs and three stools completed the furniture of the shop;
and Mr. Branghton, who chose to keep his own seat himself, desired
M. Du Bois to take another; and then seeing that I was without any,
called out to the stranger, "Come, Mr. Macartney, lend us your stool."
Shocked at their rudeness, I declined the offer; and, approaching
Miss Branghton, said, "If you will be so good as to make room for me
on your chair, there will be no occasion to disturb that gentleman."
"Lord, what signifies that?" cried the brother; "he has had his share
of sitting, I'll be sworn."
"And, if he has not," said the sister, "he has a chair up stairs;
and the shop is our own, I hope."
This grossness so much disgusted me, that I took the stool, and
carrying it back to Mr. Macartney myself, I returned him thanks as
civilly as I could for his politeness, but said that I had rather
stand.
He looked at me as if unaccustomed to such attention, bowed very
respectfully, but neither spoke nor yet made use of it.
I soon found that I was an object of derision to all present, except
M. Du Bois; and therefore, I begged Mr. Branghton would give me an
answer for Madame Duval, as I was in haste to return.
"Well, then, Tom,-Biddy, where have you a mind to go tonight? your
aunt and Miss want to be abroad and amongst them."
"Why, then, Papa," said Miss Branghton, "we'll go to Don
Saltero's. Mr. Smith likes that place, so may be he'll go along
with us."
"No, no," said the son, "I'm for White-Conduit House; so let's
go there."
"White-Conduit House, indeed!" cried his sister; "no, Tom, that
I won't."
"Why, then, let it alone; nobody wants your company;-we shall do as
well without you, I'll be sworn, and better too."
"I'll tell you what, Tom, if you don't hold your tongue, I'll make
you repent it,-that I assure you."
Just then Mr. Smith came into the shop, which he seemed to intend
passing through; but when he saw me, he stopped, and began a most
courteous enquiry after my health, protesting, that, had he known I
was there, he should have come down sooner. "But, bless me, Ma'am,"
added he, "what is the reason you stand?" and then he flew to bring
me the seat from which I had just parted.
"Mr. Smith, you are come in very good time," said Mr. Branghton,
"to end a dispute between my son and daughter, about where they shall
all go to-night."
"O, fie, Tom,-dispute with a lady!" cried Mr. Smith. "Now, as for me,
I'm for where you will, provided this young lady is of the party;-one
place is the same as another to me, so that it be but agreeable to
the ladies.-I would go any where with you, Ma'am," (to me) "unless,
indeed, it were to church; -ha, ha, ha!-You'll excuse me, Ma'am; but,
really, I never could conquer my fear of a parson;-ha, ha, ha!-Really,
ladies, I beg your pardon for being so rude; but I can't help laughing
for my life!"
"I was just saying, Mr. Smith," said Miss Branghton, "that I should
like to go to Don Saltero's;-now, pray, where should you like to go?"
"Why, really, Miss Biddy, you know I always let the ladies decide; I
never fix any thing myself; but I should suppose it would be rather
hot at the coffee-house:-however, pray, ladies, settle it among
yourselves;-I'm agreeable to whatever you choose."
It was easy for me to discover, that this man, with all his parade of
conformity, objects to every thing that is not proposed by himself:
but he is so much admired by this family for his gentility, that he
thinks himself a complete fine gentleman!
"Come," said Mr. Branghton, "the best way will be to put it to the
vote, and then every body will speak their minds. Biddy, call Poll
down stairs. We'll start fair."
"Lord, Papa," said Miss Branghton, "why can't you as well send
Tom?-you're always sending me of the errands."
A dispute then ensued, but Miss Branghton was obliged to yield.
When Mr. Brown and Miss Polly made their appearance, the latter
uttered many complaints of having been called, saying, she did not
want to come, and was very well where she was.
"Now, ladies, your votes," cried Mr. Smith; "and so, Ma'am (to me),
we'll begin with you. What place shall you like best?" and then, in
a whisper, he added, "I assure you, I shall say the same as you do,
whether I like it or not."
I said, that as I was ignorant what choice was in my power, I must
beg to hear their decisions first. This was reluctantly assented to;
and then Miss Branghton voted for Saltero's Coffee-house; her sister,
for a party to Mother Red Cap's; the brother for White-Conduit House;
Mr. Brown, for Bagnigge Wells; Mr. Braughton, for Sadler's Wells;
and Mr. Smith, for Vauxhall.
"Well now, Ma'am," said Mr. Smith, "we have all spoken, and so you
must give the casting vote. Come, what will you fix upon?"
"Sir," answered I, "I was to speak last."
"Well, so you will," said Miss Branghton, "for we've all spoke first."
"Pardon me," returned I, "the voting has not yet been quite general."
And I turned towards Mr. Macartney, to whom I wished extremely to
show that I was not of the same brutal nature with those by whom he
was treated so grossly.
"Why, pray," said Mr. Branghton, "who have we left out? would you have
the cats and dogs vote?"
"No, Sir," cried I, with some spirit, "I would have that gentleman
vote,-if, indeed, he is not superior to joining our party."
They all looked at me, as if they doubted whether or not they had
heard me right: but, in a few moments, their surprise gave way to a
rude burst of laughter.
Very much displeased, I told M. Du Bois that if he was not ready to
go, I would have a coach called for myself.
O yes, he said, he was always ready to attend me.
Mr. Smith then, advancing, attempted to take my hand, and begged me
not to leave them till I had settled the evening's plans.
"I have nothing, Sir," said I, "to do with it, as it is my intention
to stay at home; and therefore Mr. Branghton will be so good as to
send Madame Duval word what place is fixed upon, when it is convenient
to him."
And then, making a slight courtesy, I left them.
How much does my disgust for these people increase my pity for poor Mr.
Macartney! I will not see them when I can avoid so doing; but I am
determined to take every opportunity in my power to show civility to
this unhappy man, whose misfortunes with this family, only render him
an object of scorn. I was, however, very well pleased with M. Du Bois,
who, far from joining in their mirth, expressed himself extremely
shocked at their ill-breeding.
We had not walked ten yards before we were followed by Mr. Smith,
who came to make excuses, and to assure me they were only joking, and
hoped I took nothing ill; for if I did, he would make a quarrel of it
himself with the Branghtons, rather than I should receive any offense.
I begged him not to take any trouble about so immaterial an affair,
and assured him I should not myself. He was so officious, that he
would not be prevailed upon to return home, till he had walked with
us to Mr. Dawkins's.
Madame Duval was very much displeased that I brought her so little
satisfaction. White-Conduit House was at last fixed upon; and,
notwithstanding my great dislike of such parties and such places,
I was obliged to accompany them.
Very disagreeable, and much according to my expectations, the
evening proved. There were many people all smart and gaudy, and so
pert and low-bred, that I could hardly endure being amongst them;
but the party to which, unfortunately, I belonged, seemed all at home.