behold, which young People of both Sexes shew themselves in, when guided
only by their Passions; but, to avoid Prolixity, will content myself
with the general View I have already presented; and proceed to lay down
such Rules as appear to me to tend most directly and securely to the
avoiding the various Evils our Children are subject to, and seem most
conducive to their real Happiness. But before I lay down any Precepts
let me premise, that all Laws in general give Parents the sole supreme
Power of governing their Children: ’tis the Order of Nature; and if her
Laws are inverted, nothing but Confusion follows. If then Parents do not
govern their Children at all; or what is worse, let their Children govern
them, which is often the Case, the almost unavoidable Consequence will
be, that Train of Irregularities and Disorders we daily see them run
into; in which Case, there are but two Ways of their becoming sensible of
their mistake: either from a natural Goodness of Heart awakened by Time
and Experience; or from a load of Misfortunes crushing them down for want
of Power to support them: now the one we ought not to trust to; and the
other we should bend all our Study to prevent.
AN
ESSAY
ON THE
Government of CHILDREN.
HEALTH.
Tho’ the principal Design of this Attempt be that of regulating the
Manners of Children; yet as Health and Education are of vast Importance
in the Government of them, and are closely connected therewith; I think
myself oblig’d to speak of what may tend to preserve the one, and, in
a due Degree, promote the other. For the sake of Method I shall divide
my Subject into three Parts; that is, range it under the general Heads
of Health, Manners, and Education; which to me appears to be the only
natural Order of treating it. Mr. _Locke_, it is true, in his Treatise on
this Subject, calls the whole, Thoughts on Education; but notwithstanding
that general Title to his Book, he speaks likewise of Health and Manners,
and ranges them all in the Order here propos’d.
As Health is the reverse of Sickness, my Readers will easily discern that
it is not the Business of this Undertaking to invade the Physician’s
Province, by entering on the Cure of Diseases; but only to point out such
Means as seem to have the most rational tendency to prevent them.
First then, I earnestly recommend to both Father and Mother, that their
Children suck the Mother’s Breast. But why, you’ll say, take pains to
address each Parent distinctly? The reason is obvious. A Man cannot
be conversant in Life, and not see that many a sensible Woman, many
a tender Mother, has her Heart yearning to suckle her Child, and is
prevented by the misplac’d Authority of a Husband. Parents upon the whole
are to be consider’d as equally and mutually concern’d in the training up
their Children; therefore when I address them by that one common Epithet,
I mean either, or both. But there are, both in Nature and Reason, certain
Provinces assign’d to each; and a Man’s attempting to overturn them,
would be as absurd and preposterous, as a Merchant’s sending his Wife to
transact Business upon Change, while he stay’d at home to preside over
the Nursery.
Providence, we see, without any Expence to us, kindly sends Food into
the World along with the Child, by giving to the Mother a Breast flowing
with Milk. But to what purpose is this bestow’d? To be neglected and
render’d fruitless? No surely; we cannot think thus indignantly of so
great a Blessing. But besides this evident Design of Providence, there
is another important Consideration; which is, that Mothers by suckling
their Children cherish that Tenderness which Nature has implanted in
them towards their Offspring. For Experience shews, that the Office
of suckling considerably augments in them the Affection from whence
that Tenderness flows; serves as Fuel to keep their fond Breasts in one
perpetual Glow; and by sweetening their Care, enables them likewise to
bring the tender Infants thro’ their helpless Age?
Another Argument for suckling, which is not sufficiently attended to,
because not sufficiently known, is, that the Anxiety and Fatigue is
perhaps fully compensated by the Pleasure. The provident Author of Nature
has order’d in this, as in all, or most other Things, right and natural,
that the Inducement shall more than balance the Discouragement. All
Mothers who have experienc’d it, whose Minds are temper’d with natural
Affection, assure us, that there is an inexpressible Pleasure in giving
Suck, which none but Mothers know; for besides that the Sensation itself
is said to be mighty pleasing; to behold the Innocence, the Cunning,
the Tricks, and the various Whims of a Child; to observe likewise the
early Sentiments they discover; must doubtless give a Pleasure which no
Words can describe. Now if thus much be granted (and surely no Arguments
can reason it away) I cannot help advising in the strongest Terms, that
every Father consent, and even promote, that the Child be suckled by
it’s Mother; if the Mother be in a Condition for it. But then, this
Compliance, this Leave, if I must call it such, should be cordial, and
from the Heart; otherwise a Mother, tho’ the best Nurse in the World, may
become the most improper one, by a Husband’s so far souring her Temper,
as to render her Milk, not only good for nothing, but even pernicious.
The general Good of all being what I aim at, I mean to offer the same
Advice to all, as far as it can be practised; and therefore speak
according to the Nature of Things. Still I am not insensible how little
Probability there is that my Advice herein will be follow’d by Persons in
high Life. For what Room is there in general to hope, that a fine Lady
will lay herself under any of the necessary Restraints towards acting the
Part of a good Nurse, and generously give up some of the vainer Pleasures
of Life, in order to stoop to this Part of domestic Care? It is true that
there may sometimes be important Reasons which may make their doing so
improper; but it is greatly to be fear’d that those Reasons are oftener
affected than real; and as this is a Duty not so easily dispensed with
as People are apt to imagine, it is incumbent on Parents of the highest
Rank to consider how far they are really justifiable in deviating from
the Laws of Nature. But there is another important Consequence attends
the Neglect with which People of Rank treat their Offspring in this
Particular; that it thereby becomes a national Evil. It is universally
known that the Little imitate the Great, and mostly too in what is wrong;
that is, they catch their Vices sooner than their Virtues. Hence it
happens, that because a Woman of the first Rank does not deign to suckle
her Child, the Neglect descends to almost the lowest Rank; and many Men
whose Figure in Life is very inconsiderable, scorn to bear the Noise of
a Child, tho’ their own Flesh and Blood, only because it is a Practice
among their Betters to remove them. And hence too the Great have two
Reflections to make on this Point, the Duty they owe to their Children,
and, (tho’ perhaps it is not a proper Observation here) the Influence
which a Neglect of this Duty has on all beneath them.
While I am enforcing to Mothers the Duty of suckling their Children,
I must endeavour to omit no material Circumstance, either that will
contribute to the Ease of the one, or the Advantage of the other.
The first that naturally occurs, is, the Time when a Child should
be put to the Breast: and as this is a Matter variously thought of,
and often erroneously managed, tho’ I could say a good deal from my
own Observation, I have endeavour’d to settle it upon a much stronger
Basis, _viz._ the Experience of competent Judges. Dr. _Hunter_, well
known to the Public both by his Lectures in Anatomy, and his Practice
in Midwifry, and one of the Men-Midwives of the Lying-in-Hospital in
_Brownlow-Street_, informs me, that at the first opening of that Charity,
they generally conducted the Business of suckling in the following
Manner. The Child was not put to the Breast till the Milk came freely,
or run out of itself; and as the Breasts commonly began to fill in about
eight and forty Hours after Delivery, sooner or later, they were allowed
to fill more and more, perhaps as much longer, ’till the Milk began to
discharge itself: to forward this, the Breasts were frequently embrocated
with warm Oil; to invite the Milk both by the Softness of the Oil, and
the Motion given the Breasts by rubbing it in with the Hand. This Method
was adhered to pretty generally, ’till they found by Experience that
it was wrong. For besides that the Child might probably suffer in some
Degree, by being so long depriv’d of it’s most natural Physick and Food,
many grievous Effects often attend the Mother; _viz._ painful Swellings
and Inflammations of the Breasts, Milk Fevers, and Milk Sores.
These Inconveniences induced the Physicians of that Hospital to alter
the Method, which for some Time past has been as follows. The Child is
put to the Breast commonly within twenty-four Hours after Delivery: and
tho’ at first it sucks little, and that only a thin Serum, (which however
is of singular Service to the Infant by discharging the _Meconium_ that
fills the large Intestines) yet the Advantage to the Mother is, that by
this means the Milk comes gradually and kindly; and before the usual
Time of the Breasts hardening in the other Method, the Difficulty is
conquered in this; the Milk flows freely, the Breasts are soft and easy,
and the Heat of the Body continues temperate: insomuch that Dr. _Hunter_
farther assures me, that there has been much less of Inflammations of the
Breasts and Milk fevers, and but one Milk Sore among upwards of fourteen
hundred Women that have been deliver’d there since this Method has been
pursued.[2]
Here, tho’ it is a Digression from my Subject, I cannot help reflecting
with Pleasure on the Benefit arising to many industrious virtuous People
from the Institution of this Hospital. Every Charitable Foundation,
every Contribution to relieve the Needy, does Honour not only to those
who give, but to the Nation where it is given; for when Individuals
are known to be humane and benevolent, Strangers will conclude it as
a national Virtue. It is certain that all public Receptacles for the
Comfort and Support of the Distressed Indigent argue a compassionate
Heart in those who support them, and a just Sense of others Woe; but the
Lying-in-Hospital has a Delicacy in it peculiar to itself. The Ladies
who contribute to it’s Support, prove, in Terms far more expressive than
Words, their Sympathy with the Sufferings of their Sex; and particularly
with those whom Fortune has placed the farthest from them. The Gentlemen
who encourage it, and labour for it’s Promotion, shew a Tenderness which
can only dwell in manly Hearts: for he certainly comes nearest to the
Dignity of a Man, who has the tenderest Sense of the Sufferings of the
opposite Sex; and particularly of those, which his own Existence is the
necessary Cause of. But farther, most other Public Charities seem in
their Nature limited; seem to extend no farther than the immediate Relief
of those under their Care; whereas this is far more extensive: the
Mother is comforted, and with tenderest Care brought thro’ her Child-bed;
the Child (as far as Skill can reach) is safely entered on the Stage of
Life; and thus is Mankind not only preserved, but perpetuated; and thus
too is Society enlarged, and improved, to a boundless Degree. Thus much
have I said to do justice to an Undertaking in itself highly laudable,
and infallibly productive of the greatest Good. But there is another
Effect, perhaps hitherto unthought of, which will necessarily attend this
Hospital, and is no less than a general Concern; that of the Improvement
of Midwifry: the several Gentlemen who attend it in that Capacity, cannot
but have the best Foundation in their Art, that which is extended and
strengthened by the frequent Occurrence of the more nice and uncommon
Cases among such Variety: and the Women whom they educate to Midwifry
in that Hospital, must from their many Opportunities become valuable
Practitioners for such of their Sex as are inclined to employ them rather
than a Man.
But to return to the Matter in hand. This Method of putting Children
to the Breast much sooner than usual, corresponds with the Opinion of
Dr. _Cadogan_, who in a small Pamphlet on the Management of Children,
has said a great many sensible useful Things; and among the rest, he
proposes, that a Child be put to the Breast in seven or eight Hours
after it is born; whereby, says he, “It would not only provide for itself
the best of Nourishment, but by opening a free Passage for it, take off
the Mother’s Load as it increased, before it could oppress or hurt her;
and therefore effectually prevent the Fever; which is caus’d only by
the painful Distention of the lacteal Vessels of the Breasts, when the
Milk is injudiciously suffer’d to accumulate.” To this I have two Things
to add; First, to recommend to Parents that the Advice here given be
reduced to Practice, unless some extraordinary Circumstances intervene;
in which Case, their own Judgment must direct them to seek an Opinion
suitable to the Exigence. Secondly, that all Precautions be taken to
prevent the Mother’s catching Cold, or being too much fatigued in the
first Days after Delivery. It is here meant, besides the Child’s having
it’s most proper Nourishment, the Breast, as soon as possible; that the
Mother be secured not only from the Danger of sore Breasts, but even from
Inflammations and Fevers so common to the Sex in Child-bed. But while we
are guarding against Mischief one way, it is no less our Duty to prevent
it, if possible, every way; therefore do I again caution that the utmost
Care be taken to prevent the Mother’s catching Cold, or sitting up in
Bed too long for her Strength in the first Attempts to suckle her Child.
It is common for a Child, when first put to the Breast, to be unapt; the
Mother, especially if a young one, is often awkward; and if the Nurse be
unhandy or careless, the Consequences may be fatal; and indeed frequently
are so: the Reason is plain. The Perspiration which usually follows
Delivery is necessary; and where Nature is defective, Art is employ’d
to keep it up: if then these Sweats are salutary, whatever obstructs
or checks them must be dangerous; and nothing sooner or more certainly
effects this than the being injudiciously uncover’d. But besides catching
Cold, there is great Danger to be apprehended from Fatigue. That too much
Fatigue in these early Days after Delivery may be very pernicious, every
body knows who is experienced. Nothing so common as a Woman’s having had
a good Labour, and being so extremely well, that on the second, third,
or fourth Day she indulges herself with the Conversation of a Friend, or
sits up in Bed for some time for Refreshment; in Consequence of which she
grows hot, has a restless Night, and before Morning is in a raging Fever;
perhaps delirious.
The precise Time of a Child’s sucking is a Point much controverted,
particularly among Ladies, but nothing ascertain’d. The present Fashion
’tis true, is to let Children suck only three or four Months; but surely
this is too important an affair for Fashion to take place of Reason. From
my Acquaintance with the Learned on this Head, I gather, that generally
speaking a Child should not suck less than six Months, nor more than
twelve; but that the Medium, that is, nine Months, is for the most part
the best. Still there may be Reasons for varying these stated Times; if
so, Reason in that as well as in other things should be our Guide. And
farther, there may be Circumstances which impede the Mother’s suckling
her Child at all; the want of Health is a principal one; but then it
should be a real want of Health, not an imaginary one. Where then a
Doubt arises, I advise Parents not rashly and hastily to resolve for
themselves, but to consult proper Judges, and always, where it is in
their Power, be determined by their Physician.
But here, as an Encouragement to Mothers to suckle their Children, I must
observe, that it is the Opinion of Physicians that many Women would mend
their Health by it; and very few, if any, hurt a good Constitution,
unless thro’ Imprudence or Ignorance: now to obviate these, let Mothers
be careful to set out right, and then they have very little to fear.
Hunger, Fatigue, and Fretting, are the three most obvious things that
impair a Mother’s Health in Nursing. I say nothing of gross Intemperance,
violent Passions, and the like, for they are always to be banish’d; nay
we are not once to suppose they exist in the Sex. Hunger is carefully
to be avoided: while the Mother gives suck, she should never let the
Keenness of her Appetite go off by waiting long for her Meals; for that
often repeated will sink the Spirits, fill her with Wind, impair her
Strength, and consequently not only hurt herself, but prejudice her Milk
also.
I confess it is my Opinion that a very nice regard to a Nurse’s Diet is
not so generally necessary as is imagined. Temperance is universally to
be held as a Rule; but under the appearance of avoiding one Error, they
run into a greater; they often eat of very rich Dishes, and shun the use
of Vegetables: whereas to People who are young and healthy, nothing is
more wholsome than Vegetables blended with Meat: and the only Caution
that is material to be given, is, that they guard them with Pepper;
whereby they will keep under the Effect they sometimes have, of producing
Wind. But should Garden Stuff, after all this, disagree, Prudence will
certainly direct the Mother to disuse it; tho’ at the same time it must
be own’d, that where this is the Case, her Digestion is not what it ought
to be to constitute perfect Health. To this Head I will add, that where
a Woman has been accustom’d to drink a glass or two of Wine or Ale at
Meals, she should not debar herself from it now; as her waste of Strength
and Spirits certainly demand at least her usual way of Life; tho’ it does
not seem needful for her to go far beyond it.
By Fatigue I mean so much Exercise as manifestly impairs the Strength, or
brings on various Pains, so as to render a Mother incapable of executing
what she has begun; or at least makes the Office extremely slavish to
her. Exercise is good, but Fatigue is bad. There are so many different
Conditions in this great Family of the World, and so many different
Circumstances in each Station, that it is impossible to lay down Rules
for every Individual, or prescribe an universal one for all; in general I
recommend on this occasion the joint Attention of both Father and Mother.
If a Man reflects that while his Wife is suckling her Child, she is
labouring to compleat the principal Work for which they came together, he
cannot surely suffer her to endure Fatigue beyond her Power to bear; nor
can he feel for her that Tenderness he ought, if he imposes any Hardship
on her that can be dispens’d with. On the other hand, the Mother is to
remember, that besides being chearful and keeping her Mind at rest, she
must keep her Limbs at rest too; that is, she must often forego other
Exercise, that she may be enabled to bestow a larger Portion of Kindness
on her Child.
But there are several ways a Woman may be fatigued with Nursing without
the least necessity. The first thing a Mother has to do, is, to use
her Child to such Positions in suckling as she likes best, and is most
convenient to herself. When up, the Mother should by all means sit
upright, and the Child be rais’d to the Breast: the Child should yield to
the Mother, and not the Mother to the Child. That distorted Posture so
commonly seen in suckling gives great Pain to the Back, and cramps all
the Limbs; and this without any other effect on the Child than indulging
a manifest Wilfulness. When in Bed, the Child should take the Breast as
it lyes; and not incommode the Mother by making her sit up in Bed by the
Hour, purely to humour it, as is too common: for this too, without any
Benefit to the Child, greatly increases the Mother’s Fatigue, by robbing
her of her Sleep, and by exposing her to catch Cold from the various
Seasons it happens in. But these Inconveniences may farther be obviated,
by letting the Child lye in a Cradle without the Breast the Night
thro’, or with a Maid in another Room; for it is certain, that neither
Breast, Drink, nor Feeding are so absolutely necessary in the Night as
is commonly imagin’d. Some of my fair Readers will, I doubt, reject my
Counsel in this particular; but I urge it on the double Motive of Benefit
to the Child, and Ease to the Mother. Yet not to be too rigorous in this
Point, not to affect too sensibly a Mother’s Tenderness, suppose a Child
be sometimes allow’d the Breast in the Night, it certainly should be only
sometimes; for the Practice of letting it drag at it the Night thro’ is a
grievous Error: it hurts both Child and Mother; the Child by this Means
is continually wrangling, fretting, and dissatisfy’d, and the Mother is
often so sensibly affected by it, as even to be thrown into Hysteric Fits.
Difficult as I acknowledge it is to lay down an universal Rule, I will
here attempt what appears to me to be generally practicable. According
to the usual Management of Children at the Breast it may be averr’d,
that they have too little Sleep, and too much Food: that is, their
Sleep is short and broken thro’ Mismanagement, and they are suckled or
fed oftener than is conducive to Health. Now to remove this Error, I
will not offer any Restraint in the Day-time, (tho’ that in the opinion
of an ingenious Writer[3] requires it) but endeavour to effect it by
regulating the Night. To this End let a Child be undress’d, it’s Night
things put on, and be fed or suckled at seven o’Clock, and then put into
it’s Cradle; where without rocking (if used to it and in Health) it will
fall asleep. Supposing the Mother to go to Bed at ten or eleven, if the
Child should happen to be awake, let it be turn’d dry (as the Nurses term
it) and suckled again; and it will sleep soundly for six or seven Hours:
perhaps now and then it will whimper a little, but if it is not touch’d
it will fall asleep again immediately. But supposing it is not awake
when the Mother goes to Bed, let it not by any means be disturb’d, for
that breaking of Childrens Rest so common with Parents makes them vastly
tiresome; all that the Mother has to do in this Case is, to keep a warm
Cloth in Bed with her, and when the Child awakes take away the wet one
as soon as possible, that it may not be too much disturb’d by the Sense
of Cold; that done, let it have the Breast, and it will commonly sleep
again till it is time for the Family to rise. The Child should not have
its Cloth shifted again; for frequently opening it when it ought to sleep
is a great Impediment to it’s Rest; and while wrapt up warm, and it lies
still, it receives no Harm from being wet: to this must be added, that
the Mother be very hush; no talking, no shewing the Candle, the Daylight,
or any thing that may awaken it thoroughly. If this Method be adher’d
to, I am persuaded it will have many good Effects; it will give a longer
respite than usual from feeding or suckling; it will obtain what is of
great Consequence to a Child’s Health, Sleep; and it will facilitate the
Mother’s Task by lessening her Fatigue.
To suffer by Hunger or Fatigue does great injury to the Mother
principally, but Fretting has always a double Consequence; it hurts the
Child too. A fretful Temper turns even Pleasure into Pain; well then may
it make a necessary Care a Fatigue. One Distinction however I would make
that I think deserves Attention; whether the Fretfulness be in Nature,
be fixt and incurable; or whether it be owing to external Accidents,
the Occurrences of Things; such as frequent Provocations from a Husband,
untoward Children, wasteful Servants, vexatious Law Suits, and many other
Evils Life is fraught with. In the first Case, Women would do well to let
suckling alone; for warm as I am in recommending this Practice, it is
certain there are some few Exceptions, and this is one. But in the other,
I urge suckling in great measure as a Remedy. For let the naturally
good-temper’d Mother but once reflect that Fretting hurts her Child, and
she will avoid it for her Infant’s sake: besides, the Love created in
her for it by the Exercise of this natural Duty, will make her forget
many other Cares; at least it will counterpoise her Troubles, by mingling
Pleasure with Pain.
There is a Class of Women who are lifeless and sluggish, an insipid Race
that do neither good nor harm; these should by all means suckle their
Children, for by so doing they would be enliven’d, and animated with
a Desire to become useful. If too they reflect, that the Intention of
Nature is, that they should rear their Children as well as bear them,
they will soon be ashamed of doing their Work by halves: and thus become
much happier in themselves, and of much more Consequence to Society.
By the Observance of these few Rules, Mothers in general may suckle
their Children, not only without Pain or Injury, but even with Pleasure
and Profit. They may sometimes improve their Health; often lessen their
Cares, and mend their Temper and Dispositions; and will always have a
pleasing Consciousness that they have obey’d the Laws of Nature, by
having done all that was incumbent on them.