One day a village parson was summoned in haste by Mrs. Johnson, who had
been taken seriously ill. He went in some wonder at the summons, because
the woman was not of his parish, and was known to be devoted to her own
minister, the Rev. Mr. Hopkins.
While he was waiting in the parlor before seeing the sick woman, he
passed the time talking with her daughter.
"I am very pleased your mother thought of me in her illness," he said.
"Is Mr. Hopkins away?"
"Oh, dear no," she replied, "but we are afraid mother has something
contagious, like small-pox, and we couldn't think of letting dear Mr.
Hopkins run any risk!"
* * * * *
"If yu trade horses with a jockey, you kan't git cheated but once.
But--if yu trade with a deakon yu may git cheated twice--once in the
horse, and once in the deakon" ... "Go in when it rains."
_Josh Billings_
* * * * *
"Now, my man," said the minister to the happy bridegroom after the
marriage ceremony, "you have come to the end of all your troubles." The
man came back to the minister a week later and said: "You told me I had
come to the end of all my troubles when I got married, and I find they
are just beginning." "Ah, my dear brother," was the response, "all
troubles have two ends, and I didn't say which end, did I?"