The minister was a very genial man and a very witty man. He had great
difficulty in getting his salary promptly. Of late it was much in
arrears, and he did not know what to do. One day he entered the hardware
store kept by his leading deacon, and asked to look at corkscrews. He
looked over the assortment very carefully, saying that he wanted quite a
large one, one that was very strong, too. And when the deacon asked him
what he wanted with a corkscrew, the minister replied, "I want it to
draw my salary with." He got it.
* * * * *
A negro exhorter shouted to his audience, "Come up an' jine de army ob
de Lord!"
"I'se done jined," replied one woman.
"Whar'd yo' jine?" asked the exhorter.
"In de Baptis' Church."
"Why, chile," said the exhorter, "yo' ain't in de army ob de Lord; yo's
in de navy."