Artemus Ward was traveling on a slow-going southern road soon after the
war. While the conductor was punching his ticket, Artemus remarked:
"Does this railroad company allow passengers to give it advice, if they
do so in a respectful manner?" The conductor replied in gruff tones that
he guessed so. "Well," Artemus went on, "it has occurred to me that it
would be well, perhaps, to detach the cow-catcher from the front of the
engine and hitch it to the rear of the train. For, you see, we are not
likely to overtake a cow; but what's to prevent a cow strolling into
this car and biting the passengers?"