"GENTLEMEN,--While the grand piano next door was playing last
evening I pressed the button of The Clinchophone. The piano
immediately sat back on its haunches, gibbered and then fell
on the player."
"DEAR SIR,--At the first trial of my new Clinchophone my
neighbour's gramophone rushed out of the house and has not been
heard of since."
"SAVED" says: "Last night the _basso profondo_ two doors away
started singing, 'Rocked in the Cradle of the Deep.' He sang two
bars and then crawled round to my house on his hands and knees and
collapsed on the doorstep with the word 'Kamerad!' on his lips."
* * * * *