"Is it right to keep me in here, and let McMullins sleep in her bed?"
It was not for me to decide the right or wrong of the Deputy's orders,
to a prisoner.
"McMullins has fits, and it would not be safe to leave her in solitary
all night. I should not sleep at all if she were there. I am sorry for
you, O'Brien; but you don't wish McMullins to remain, in solitary
because you must, do you?"
"No, ma'am; but it don't seem hardly fair to let one out, and not the
other."
She was using the same argument with me to get her bed that I had used
with the Deputy to get it for her.
"When you have been here before, and been punished, you have behaved
very badly, have you not?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Annie O'Brien, will you be patient to-night, and make no complaints?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"In the morning, when the Deputy comes around, will you tell him that
you will try to govern your temper?"
"I will tell you so."
"Will you tell him so?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Good night, Annie, and may the Christ, whose name you called so
wickedly this morning, take care of you!"
"Good night, ma'am!"
The next morning, when I gave O'Brien her bread and water, I asked
her,--
"O'Brien, do you think, if McMullins were to strike you again, you would
strike back?"
"I don't think I should now,--I shouldn't if I thought."
"What do you think of your behavior yesterday?"
"I am ashamed of myself that I should take any notice of that poor,
foolish, half crazy thing! But I've got an awful temper, and it gets
the upper hands of me before I know it."
"When the Deputy comes around, if he says anything to you, will you tell
him you are ashamed of yourself, and resolved to do better?"
"He never could make me say it to him before."
"He may not ask you to now; if he does, you will be submissive and
perfectly respectful?"
"Yes, ma'am, I will."
When the Deputy came in, I importuned him to unlock my women.
"If I do, it will only be to have O'Brien locked up again in a few days.
She has been here twice before, and is one of the worst cases we have
ever had."
"If she is subdued and promises to do better, is not that enough?"
"Subdued!" he echoed. "She will promise anything to get out."
"Did you ever get a promise from her to do better?"
"I don't think we ever did. She has always braved us as long as she
could speak."
"I am a new mistress, my management may be new to her. Will you let me
try her, if you please? She is such a young thing, it seems as though
she might be influenced to reform. You are punishing me to keep her in
that dark cell. It takes my strength all away to think of her there. I
could not sleep last night,--thoughts of her haunted me."
The tears came into my eyes. If he had refused me, I should have cried
outright. He was a man, and one of kindly feelings, too, when left to
himself. He gave me the order,--
"Bring me your key!"
I brought it very quickly, and unlocked Annie's cell with more alacrity
than I ever turned key in a lock before.
"O'Brien," said the Deputy to her, "I let you out because your Matron
asks me to. Now show your gratitude by your good behavior, and obedience
to her."
"I will try, sir."
"Unlock the other one when you please," he said to me, and went out.
O'Brien turned to me.
"I will never give you occasion to have me locked up again, while I am
here. I never made the promise before, but I make it now. I have been in
solitary ten days and ten nights; I have been carried from there to the
hospital, fainted away dead, and my feet so swelled that I could not
walk on them. I have been gagged till my jaws were so stiff and swelled
that I could not shut my mouth. I have been in the dungeon in the
cellar"--
"Stop, Annie! in the name of pity, stop!"
I was sick to loathing of the cruelty she recounted. Was I in one of the
prisons of the Inquisition, hearing a description of their tortures?
"It is the truth. And I never made a promise to do any better before."
I trembled with disgust, almost fear, of the place I was in. I bethought
me, I am here to benefit these poor wretches. I held my breath as I
asked,--
"What was all that done for?"
"Because I sauced a matron, and wouldn't say I was sorry."
"Did you say it at last?"
"No, ma'am! I wouldn't have said it if they had killed me. I was so mad
I had just as soon died as not. The more they did to me, the madder I
grew, and I swore, if ever I should catch her outside, I would pay her
back, if I got in here for life."
"Annie O'Brien, if you were to sauce me, as you call it, I should punish
you." I did not say how. "I expect you to treat me with respect always.
It is not treating me with respect to quarrel with the other women in my
presence."
"I shall always treat you with respect. I could never be mean enough to
do anything else after the way you have treated me."
She fulfilled her promise. Never yet have I met a human being that
kindness would not influence; but I have met with many a perverse will
that harshness would neither bend or break.
"Now, Annie, you say that you wish to govern your temper, and that you
will try?"
"I will try!"
"I will help you. When you begin to grow angry, shut your lips close
together; then, look for me before you answer."
"I will, if I can think."
"As soon as you do think, come straight to me, and tell me that you were
getting angry. If I see you, and can catch your eye, I will lift my
finger in warning; or I will call your name. Will you heed me?"
"I will try, with all my might."
"Go get your breakfast, and then go about your work."
Many a time after that, when I saw her face growing pale with anger, I
have called her name, and lifted my finger. She would recognize the
signal, drop upon a bench, or the bare brick floor, bury her face in her
hands for a few moments, then arise and go about her work without
speaking a word.
Once, about a week after that locking up, she got into an altercation
with the slide woman. I was in the prison; but I heard her voice, and
ran to the kitchen door.
"Annie!" I called. She did not heed me, but went on with her dispute.
"Annie, remember!" I whispered in her ear as I caught her arm.
She jerked it away from me. I looked her steadily in the eye. She
dropped hers. She was wavering between the disposition to obey, and the
desire to indulge her temper.
"There is the Dr.'s whistle, Annie. Run to the wash-room, and tell Mrs.
Martin he is coming!"
She ran out quickly; but when she came back, she walked slowly, looking
down to her feet. She came up to me and asked:--
"Why didn't you get me punished? I almost broke my promise; but I didn't
mean to. If you had scolded me, I certainly should."
"I did not get you punished, because I see that you are trying to govern
your temper, and I promised to help you. If I were to get angry and
scold, of what use would it be for me to reprove you?"
"If you had scolded me then, I should certainly have sauced you, and
then I should have been punished. Didn't you send me away on purpose?"
"If I did, it was better than scolding."
"I thought so; and this shall be the last time I will be so foolish."
"I hope so; but if I am obliged to hold up my finger a great many more
times, I shall not be disappointed."