_Enter LUCIO and two _Gentlemen_._
_Lucio._ If the duke, with the other dukes, come not to
composition with the King of Hungary, why then all the
dukes fall upon the king.
_First Gent._ Heaven grant us its peace, but not the
King of Hungary's! 5
_Sec. Gent._ Amen.
_Lucio._ Thou concludest like the sanctimonious pirate,
that went to sea with the Ten Commandments, but scraped
one out of the table.
_Sec. Gent._ 'Thou shalt not steal'? 10
_Lucio._ Ay, that he razed.
_First Gent._ Why, 'twas a commandment to command
the captain and all the rest from their functions: they put
forth to steal. There's not a soldier of us all, that, in the
thanksgiving before meat, do relish the petition well that 15
prays for peace.
_Sec. Gent._ I never heard any soldier dislike it.
_Lucio._ I believe thee; for I think thou never wast
where grace was said.
_Sec. Gent._ No? a dozen times at least. 20
_First Gent._ What, in metre?
_Lucio._ In any proportion or in any language.
_First Gent._ I think, or in any religion.
_Lucio._ Ay, why not? Grace is grace, despite of all
controversy: as, for example, thou thyself art a wicked 25
villain, despite of all grace.
_First Gent._ Well, there went but a pair of shears between
us.
_Lucio._ I grant; as there may between the lists and the
velvet. Thou art the list. 30
_First Gent._ And thou the velvet: thou art good velvet;
thou'rt a three-piled piece, I warrant thee: I had as lief
be a list of an English kersey, as be piled, as thou art
piled, for a French velvet. Do I speak feelingly now?
_Lucio._ I think thou dost; and, indeed, with most painful 35
feeling of thy speech: I will, out of thine own confession,
learn to begin thy health; but, whilst I live, forget to
drink after thee.
_First Gent._ I think I have done myself wrong, have
I not? 40
_Sec. Gent._ Yes, that thou hast, whether thou art tainted
or free.
_Lucio._ Behold, behold, where Madam Mitigation
comes! I have purchased as many diseases under her roof
as come to-- 45
_Sec. Gent._ To what, I pray?
_Lucio._ Judge.
_Sec. Gent._ To three thousand dolours a year.
_First Gent._ Ay, and more.
_Lucio._ A French crown more. 50
_First Gent._ Thou art always figuring diseases in me;
but thou art full of error; I am sound.
_Lucio._ Nay, not as one would say, healthy; but so
sound as things that are hollow: thy bones are hollow;
impiety has made a feast of thee. 55
_Enter MISTRESS OVERDONE._
_First Gent._ How now! which of your hips has the
most profound sciatica?
_Mrs Ov._ Well, well; there's one yonder arrested and
carried to prison was worth five thousand of you all.
_Sec. Gent._ Who's that, I pray thee? 60
_Mrs Ov._ Marry, sir, that's Claudio, Signior Claudio.
_First Gent._ Claudio to prison? 'tis not so.
_Mrs Ov._ Nay, but I know 'tis so: I saw him arrested;
saw him carried away; and, which is more, within these
three days his head to be chopped off. 65
_Lucio._ But, after all this fooling, I would not have it
so. Art thou sure of this?
_Mrs Ov._ I am too sure of it: and it is for getting
Madam Julietta with child.
_Lucio._ Believe me, this may be: he promised to meet 70
me two hours since, and he was ever precise in promise-keeping.
_Sec. Gent._ Besides, you know, it draws something near
to the speech we had to such a purpose.
_First Gent._ But, most of all, agreeing with the proclamation. 75
_Lucio._ Away! let's go learn the truth of it.
[_Exeunt Lucio and Gentlemen._
_Mrs Ov._ Thus, what with the war, what with the
sweat, what with the gallows, and what with poverty, I am
custom-shrunk. 80
_Enter POMPEY._
How now! what's the news with you?
_Pom._ Yonder man is carried to prison.
_Mrs Ov._ Well; what has he done?
_Pom._ A woman.
_Mrs Ov._ But what's his offence? 85
_Pom._ Groping for trouts in a peculiar river.
_Mrs Ov._ What, is there a maid with child by him?
_Pom._ No, but there's a woman with maid by him.
You have not heard of the proclamation, have you?
_Mrs Ov._ What proclamation, man? 90
_Pom._ All houses in the suburbs of Vienna must be
plucked down.
_Mrs Ov._ And what shall become of those in the city?
_Pom._ They shall stand for seed: they had gone down
too, but that a wise burgher put in for them. 95
_Mrs Ov._ But shall all our houses of resort in the suburbs
be pulled down?
_Pom._ To the ground, mistress.
_Mrs Ov._ Why, here's a change indeed in the commonwealth!
What shall become of me? 100
_Pom._ Come; fear not you: good counsellors lack no
clients: though you change your place, you need not
change your trade; I'll be your tapster still. Courage!
there will be pity taken on you: you that have worn your
eyes almost out in the service, you will be considered. 105
_Mrs Ov._ What's to do here, Thomas tapster? let's
withdraw.
_Pom._ Here comes Signior Claudio, led by the provost
to prison; and there's Madam Juliet. [_Exeunt._
_Enter PROVOST, CLAUDIO, JULIET, and _Officers_._
_Claud._ Fellow, why dost thou show me thus to the world? 110
Bear me to prison, where I am committed.
_Prov._ I do it not in evil disposition,
But from Lord Angelo by special charge.
_Claud._ Thus can the demigod Authority
Make us pay down for our offence by weight 115
The words of heaven;--on whom it will, it will;
On whom it will not, so; yet still 'tis just.
_Re-enter LUCIO and two _Gentlemen_._
_Lucio._ Why, how now, Claudio! whence comes this restraint?
_Claud._ From too much liberty, my Lucio, liberty:
As surfeit is the father of much fast, 120
So every scope by the immoderate use
Turns to restraint. Our natures do pursue,
Like rats that ravin down their proper bane,
A thirsty evil; and when we drink we die.
_Lucio._ If I could speak so wisely under an arrest, I 125
would send for certain of my creditors: and yet, to say the
truth, I had as lief have the foppery of freedom as the
morality of imprisonment. What's thy offence, Claudio?
_Claud._ What but to speak of would offend again.
_Lucio._ What, is't murder? 130
_Claud._ No.
_Lucio._ Lechery?
_Claud._ Call it so.
_Prov._ Away, sir! you must go.
_Claud._ One word, good friend. Lucio, a word with you. 135
_Lucio._ A hundred, if they'll do you any good.
Is lechery so look'd after?
_Claud._ Thus stands it with me:--upon a true contract
I got possession of Julietta's bed:
You know the lady; she is fast my wife, 140
Save that we do the denunciation lack
Of outward order: this we came not to,
Only for propagation of a dower
Remaining in the coffer of her friends;
From whom we thought it meet to hide our love 145
Till time had made them for us. But it chances
The stealth of our most mutual entertainment
With character too gross is writ on Juliet.
_Lucio._ With child, perhaps?
_Claud._ Unhappily, even so.
And the new Deputy now for the Duke,-- 150
Whether it be the fault and glimpse of newness,
Or whether that the body public be
A horse whereon the governor doth ride,
Who, newly in the seat, that it may know
He can command, lets it straight feel the spur; 155
Whether the tyranny be in his place,
Or in his eminence that fills it up.
I stagger in:--but this new governor
Awakes me all the enrolled penalties
Which have, like unscour'd armour, hung by the wall
So long, that nineteen zodiacs have gone round,
And none of them been worn; and, for a name,
Now puts the drowsy and neglected act
Freshly on me: 'tis surely for a name.
_Lucio._ I warrant it is: and thy head stands so tickle 165
on thy shoulders, that a milkmaid, if she be in love, may
sigh it off. Send after the duke, and appeal to him.
_Claud._ I have done so, but he's not to be found.
I prithee, Lucio, do me this kind service:
This day my sister should the cloister enter 170
And there receive her approbation:
Acquaint her with the danger of my state;
Implore her, in my voice, that she make friends
To the strict deputy; bid herself assay him:
I have great hope in that; for in her youth 175
There is a prone and speechless dialect,
Such as move men; beside, she hath prosperous art
When she will play with reason and discourse,
And well she can persuade.
_Lucio._ I pray she may; as well for the encouragement 180
of the like, which else would stand under grievous imposition,
as for the enjoying of thy life, who I would be sorry
should be thus foolishly lost at a game of tick-tack. I'll
to her.
_Claud._ I thank you, good friend Lucio. 185
_Lucio._ Within two hours.
_Claud._ Come, officer, away!
[_Exeunt._
NOTES: I, 2.