In these days of societies for the prevention of this and that, why
can not we have a Society for the Prevention of Malfeasance in Office?
More than half of all the money paid in taxes is in one way or another
stolen. From the humblest janitorship up to the chief magistracy of the
state (both inclusive) the offices are held by men of whom a majority
are as scurvy knaves as many of those in the penitentiaries. There
is no exaggeration in this statement; it is literally, absolutely
true. Then why, it may be asked, does not the press expose all this
corruption? For many reasons, among them these: the corruption of the
press; the circumstance that malfeasance in office is no news; the
absence of a public opinion that will do more than passively approve,
whereas the private animosities engendered by exposure are active,
implacable, and dangerous; the absence of such a society as the one
suggested. An additional reason may be called, softly, the rascality
of the courts. Not all horses are sorrel, and not all judges rogues.
Not all pigs have spiral tails, nor all prosecuting attorneys crooked
morals. Nevertheless he who lightly incurs law suits, relying upon the
justice of his cause, has no need to wear motley, for assuredly none
will think him other than a fool.
It is in our courts that officers and members of the Society for the
Prevention of Malfeasance in Office would be least welcome and most
terrifying. Their presence would be to our boss-made judges and thrifty
district attorneys what the sudden apparition of the late Mr. Henry
Bergh used to be to draygentlemen engaged in tormenting their horses.
It would be easy, without stopping to take thought or breath, to name
a score of judges of our higher courts, in present incumbency or newly
retired, whose perturbations from that cause would attain to the
dignity of a panic.
The thing is easily feasible. It requires, mainly, liberal endowment by
that class of the wealthy whose interests do not lie in the stability
of misgovernment. Zealous and incorruptible officers to investigate,
able attorneys to prosecute, honest newspapers to assist and spread the
light. These will come of themselves. A few successful prosecutions
of official offenders, a few impeachments and removals, a few hitherto
invincible rascals sent to the penitentiary, a little educating of
the people to the fact that a new power for good is risen among them,
and money will come in abundantly. Rightly conducted the Society will
become a popular favorite, accredited alike by alliance of the wise
and hostility of knaves, and fairly good government by unofficial
supervision become an accomplished fact. Apparently there is no other
way whereby it may be obtained.
Of course the Society need not be named what I have called it, and the
scope of its activity should be greater than that name implies. It
should aim to prevent (by exposure and punishment) not only malfeasance
in office, but all manner of sins and stupidities in public life. Our
existing machinery for obtaining honest and intelligent government
is altogether inadequate; it breaks down at all points and—fatal
defect!—it is not automatic. The laws do not enforce themselves—not
even the laws for enforcing the laws. The “wheels of justice” are
easily “blocked” because nobody is concerned to put his shoulder to
them. Who will come forward and provide a motor for this inert and
sluggish mechanism? Here is as good an opportunity for distinction as
one can want. But let no one seek to grasp it who has not a strong
hand and a hard head; there will be bloody noses and cracked crowns
enow, God wot. If one have a taste for fighting he can have it by
the bellyful. If he enjoy ridicule, calumniation, persecution, they
shall come to him in quantity to fit his appetite. Maylike he shall
have knowledge of how it feels to sleep in field-feathers on stone.
But assuredly there are for that man, if he be of the right kidney,
an imperishing renown and “the thanks of millions yet to be.” Let him
stand forth. Let him fall to and organize. Let him tout the country
for subscriptions and begin. In the end he shall find that the little
fire that he kindled has spread over all the land with a crackling
consumption of rascalry; and his children’s children shall warm them in
the memory.
1881.