WOOD. (_shouting, L._) Half-past!
_Exit DAVID, L._
MRS. C. Yes! We really must have a good night's rest, or we shall not
be fit for the fancy dress ball to-morrow. (_to MRS. LARKINGS_) We've
settled our costume, my dear! Caroline is going as Little Red Riding
Hood, Marmy as a Neapolitan brigand--(_WOODCOCK makes a wry
face_)--and I--_à la Pompadour_!
WOOD. (_aside_) I don't exactly know what a _pumpadoor_ is, but I hope
it's something decent! (_dance music again heard_)
MRS. L. Come, ladies! by-the-bye, I mustn't forget your fans and
gloves--this way! you'll find us in the ball room in less than five
minutes, Mr. Woodcock, this way.
_Exeunt MRS. LARKINGS, MRS. CARVER, and MRS. WOODCOCK at door, C.
to L.--door closed._
WOOD. That attempt of mine upon Mrs. Woodcock's coronet was a
contemptible failure. (_yawning_) I wonder if I shall ever have a good
night's rest again! Never mind, I'll make up for it when I get back to
Stow-on-the-Wold--if ever I do get back; I won't get up for a month! I
believe Mrs. Woodcock would go back if it wasn't for Carver. I wish
somebody would marry Carver! I'll give any man a thousand pounds if
he'll marry--and after all, Carver's not absolutely repulsive--and I'm
sure there's plenty of her for the money.
_Enter SWANSDOWN in evening dress at C. from L._
SWANS. (_going to door R., and taking ticket out of his pocket_)
Ticket No. 37. (_MAID appears, takes ticket, and disappears_)
WOOD. Why, that's Swansdown! he's actually giving up his ticket!
SWANS. (_seeing WOODCOCK_) Ah, Woodcock! how d'ye do? (_receiving a
hat and cloak from MAID, and coming forward putting them on_) That'll
do! Good night, Woodcock! (_crosses to L._)
WOOD. Stop a bit! you don't mean to say you're going home, Swansdown?
SWANS. Of course I am! I ought to have been in bed two hours ago.
(_yawning_)
WOOD. So ought I! (_yawning_) I say, Swansdown, how do you manage it?
SWANS. Manage what?
WOOD. To go home without Mrs. Swansdown?
SWANS. I leave her behind!
WOOD. Exactly--but--how do you manage to leave her behind?
SWANS. I go home without her!
WOOD. I see!