Lydia Pinkham recently received a love letter from the vegetable compound
magnate reading as follows, our correspondents report:
“Do you carrot all for me? My bleeding heart beets for you. My
love is as soft as a squash, but as strong as an onion. You are
a peach with your radish hair and turnip nose. Your cherry lips
and forget-me-not eyes call me. You are the apple of my eye,
and if we canteloupe lettuce marry for I am sure we would make
a happy pear.”
* * * * *
Lovely Calves We’re Having!
“Oh see the darling little cow-lets!”
“Miss, those are not cow-lets, they’re bull-ets.”