She sketched a husband strong and brave
On whom her heart might lean;
None but a hero would she have--
This girl of 17.
Her fancy subsequently turned
From deeds of derring do;
For brainy intercourse she yearned
When she was 22.
The years sped on, ambition taught
A worldly-wise design;
A man of wealth was what she sought
When she was 29.
But Time has modified her plan;
Weak, imbecile, or poor--
She's simply looking for a _man_
Now she is 34.
* * * * *
OUR VILLAGE INDUSTRIAL COMPETITION.--_Husband (just home from the
City)._ "My angel!--crying!--whatever's the matter?" _Wife._
"They've--awarded me--prize medal"--_(sobbing)_--"f' my sponge cake!"
_Husband (soothingly)._ "And I'm quite sure it deserv----" _Wife
(hysterically)._ "Oh--but--'t said--'twas--for the best specimen--o'
concrete!"
* * * * *
[Illustration: "FOR THIS RELIEF----?"
"I'm sorry to hear your wife is suffering from her throat. I hope it's
nothing serious?"
"No, I don't think so. The doctor's forbidden her to talk much. It'll
trouble her a good deal, I expect, and she won't be herself for some
time."]
* * * * *