Francis Osbaldistone, when he encountered the famous Rob Roy by night,
was in all probability, notwithstanding Sir Walter's assertion to the
contrary, in a very tolerable state of trepidation. At least I know that
I was, as I neared the bridge of Dreepdaily. It was a nasty night of
wind and rain, and not a soul was stirring in the street--the surface
of which did little credit to the industry of the paving department,
judging from the number of dubs in which I found involuntary
accommodation. As I floundered along through the mire, I breathed
anything but benedictions on the mysterious Shell Out, who was the
cause of my midnight wandering.
Just as I reached the bridge, beneath which the river was roaring rather
uncomfortably, a ragged-looking figure started out from an entry. A
solitary lamp, suspended from above, gave me a full view of this
personage, who resembled an animated scarecrow.
He stared me full in the face, and then muttered, with a wink and a
leer,--
"Was ye seekin' for ony body the nicht? Eh wow, man, but it's cauld!"
"Who may you be, my friend?" said I, edging off from my unpromising
acquaintance.
"Wha may I be?" replied the other: "that's a gude ane! Gosh, d'ye no ken
me? Au'm Geordie Dowie, the town bauldy, that's as weel kent as the
Provost hissell!"
To say the truth, Geordie was a very truculent-looking character to be
an innocent. However, imbeciles of this description are usually
harmless.
"And what have you got to say to me, Geordie?"
"If ye're the man I think ye are,
And ye're name begins wi' a D,
Just tak ye tae yer soople shanks,
And tramp alang wi' me,"
quavered the idiot, who, like many others, had a natural turn for
poetry.
"And where are we going to, Geordie, my man?" said I in a soothing
voice.
"Ye'll find that when we get there," replied the bauldy.
"Hey the bonnie gill-stoup!
Ho the bonnie gill-stoup!
Gie me walth o' barley bree,
And leeze me on the gill-stoup!"
"But you can at least tell me who sent you here, Geordie?" said I,
anxious for further information before intrusting myself to such erratic
guidance.
He of the gill-stoups lifted up his voice and sang--
"Cam' ye by Tweedside,
Or cam' ye by Flodden?
Met ye the deil
On the braes o' Culloden?
"Three imps o' darkness
I saw in a neuk,
Riving the red-coats,
And roasting the Deuk.
"Quo' ane o' them--'Geordie,
Gae down to the brig,
I'm yaup for my supper,
And fetch us a Whig.'
"Ha! ha! ha! Hoo d'ye like that, my man? Queer freends ye've gotten noo,
and ye'll need a lang spoon to sup kail wi' them. But come awa'. I canna
stand here the haill nicht listening to your havers."
Although the hint conveyed by Mr Dowie's ingenious verses was rather of
an alarming nature, I made up my mind at once to run all risks and
follow him. Geordie strode on, selecting apparently the most
unfrequented lanes, and making, as I anxiously observed, for a remote
part of the suburbs. Nor was his voice silent during our progress, for
he kept regaling me with a series of snatches, which, being for the most
part of a supernatural and diabolical tendency, did not much contribute
towards the restoration of my equanimity. At length he paused before a
small house, the access to which was by a downward flight of steps.
"Ay--this is the place!" he muttered. "I ken it weel. It's no just bad
the whusky that they sell, but they needna put sae muckle water
intil't."
So saying, he descended the stair. I followed. There was no light in the
passage, but the idiot went forward, stumbling and groping in the dark.
I saw a bright ray streaming through a crevice, and three distinct
knocks were given.
"Come in, whaever ye are!" said a bluff voice: and I entered a low
apartment, in which the candles looked yellow through a fog of
tobacco-smoke. Three men were seated at a deal table, covered with the
implements of national conviviality; and to my intense astonishment none
of the three were strangers to me. I at once recognised the features of
the taciturn M'Auslan, the wary Shanks, and the independent Mr Thomas
Gills.
"There's the man ye wanted," said Geordie Dowie, slapping me familiarly
on the shoulder.--"Whaur's the dram ye promised me?
"In Campbelltown my luve was born,
Her mither in Glen Turrit!
But Ferintosh is the place for me,
For that's the strangest speerit!"
"Haud yer clavering tongue, ye common village!" said Toddy Tam. "Wad ye
bring in the neebourhood on us? M'Auslan, gie the body his dram, and
then see him out of the door. We manna be interfered wi' in our cracks."
M'Auslan obeyed. A large glass of alcohol was given to my guide, who
swallowed it with a sigh of pleasure.
"Eh, man! that's gude and strang! It's no ilka whusky that'll mak
Geordie Dowie pech. Fair fa' yer face, my bonny M'Auslan! could you no
just gi'e us anither?"
"Pit him out!" said the remorseless Gills. "It's just extraordinar how
fond the creature is o' drink!" and Geordie was forcibly ejected, after
an ineffectual clutch at the bottle.
"Sit ye down, Mr Dunshunner," said Toddy Tam, addressing himself to me;
"sit ye down, and mix yoursel' a tumbler. I daresay now ye was a little
surprised at the note ye got this morning, eh?"
"Why, certainly, Mr Gills, I did not anticipate the pleasure----"
"Ay, I kenned ye wad wonder at it. But ilka place has its ain way o'
doing business, and this is ours--quiet and cozy, ye see. I'se warrant,
too, ye thocht M'Auslan a queer ane because he wadna speak out?"
I laughed dubiously towards M'Auslan, who responded with the austerest
of possible grins.
"And Shanks, too," continued Toddy Tam; "Shanks wadna speak out neither.
They're auld-farrant hands baith o' them, Mr Dunshunner, and they didna
like to promise ony thing without me. We three aye gang thegither."
"I hope, then, Mr Gills, that I may calculate upon your support and that
of your friends. My views upon the currency----"
"Ay! that's speaking out at ance. Hoo muckle?"
"Ay! hoo muckle?" interposed M'Auslan, with a glistening eye.
"I really do not understand you, gentlemen."
"Troth, then, ye're slow at the uptak," remarked Gills, after a meaning
pause. "I see we maun be clear and conceese. Hark ye, Mr
Dunshunner,--wha do ye think we are?"
"Three most respectable gentlemen, for whom I have the highest possible
regard."
"Hoots!--nonsense! D'ye no ken?"
"No," was my puzzled response.
"Weel, then," said Toddy Tam, advancing his lips to my ear, and pouring
forth an alcoholic whisper--"we three can do mair than ye think o'--It's
huz that is THE CLIQUE!"
I recoiled in perfect amazement, and gazed in succession upon the
countenances of the three compatriots. Yes--there could be no doubt
about it--I was in the presence of the tremendous junta of Dreepdaily;
the veil of Isis had been lifted up, and the principal figure upon the
pedestal was the magnanimous and independent Gills. Always a worshipper
of genius, I began to entertain a feeling little short of veneration
towards Toddy Tam. The admirable manner in which he had contrived to
conceal his real power from the public--his assumed indignation and
horror of the Clique--and his hold over all classes of the electors,
demonstrated him at once to be a consummate master of the political art.
Machiavelli could not have devised a subtler stratagem than Gills.
"That's just the plain truth o' the matter," observed Shanks, who had
hitherto remained silent. "We three is the Clique, and we hae the
representation o' the burrow in our hands. Now, to speak to the point,
if we put our names down on your Committee, you carry the election, and
we're ready to come to an understanding upon fair and liberal grounds."
And we did come to an understanding upon grounds which might be justly
characterised as fair on the one side, and certainly liberal on the
other. There was of course some little discussion as to the lengths I
was expected to go in financial matters; and it was even hinted that,
with regard to bullion, the Honourable Mr Pozzlethwaite might possibly
entertain as enlarged views as myself. However, we fortunately succeeded
in adjusting all our differences. I not only promised to give the weight
of my name to a bill, but exhibited, upon the spot, a draft which met
with the cordial approbation of my friends, and which indeed was so
satisfactory that they did not offer to return it.
"That's a' right then," said Toddy Tam, inserting the last-mentioned
document in a greasy pocket-book. "Our names go down on your Committy,
and the election is as gude as won!"
An eldritch laugh at a little window, which communicated with the
street, at this moment electrified the speaker. There was a glimpse of a
human face seen through the dingy pane.
A loud oath burst from the lips of Toddy Thomas.
"Some deevil has been watching us!" he cried. "Rin, M'Auslan, rin for
your life, and grip him afore he can turn the corner! I wad not for a
thousand pund that this nicht's wark were to get wind!"
M'Auslan rushed, as desired; but all his efforts were ineffectual. The
fugitive, whoever he was, had very prudently dived into the darkness,
and the draper returned without his victim.
"What is to be done?" said I. "It strikes me, gentlemen, that this may
turn out to be a very unpleasant business."
"Nae fears--nae fears!" said Toddy Tam, looking, however, the reverse of
comfortable. "It will hae been some callant trying to fley us, that's
a'. But, mind ye--no a word o' this to ony living human being, and aboon
a' to Provost Binkie. I've keepit him for four years in the dark, and it
never wad do to show the cat the road to the kirn!"
I acquiesced in the precautionary arrangement, and we parted; Toddy Tam
and his friends having, by this time, disposed of all the surplus fluid.
It was very late before I reached the Provost's dwelling.
I suppose that next morning I had overslept myself; for, when I awoke, I
heard Miss Binkie in full operation at the piano. This time, however,
she was not singing alone, for a male voice was audible in conjunction
with hers.
"It would be an amazing consolation to me if somebody would carry off
that girl!" thought I, as I proceeded with my toilet. "I made a deuced
fool of myself to her yesterday; and, to say the truth, I don't very
well know how to look her in the face!"
However, there was no help for it, so I proceeded down-stairs. The
first individual I recognised in the breakfast parlour was M'Corkindale.
He was engaged in singing, along with Miss Binkie, some idiotical catch
about a couple of albino mice.
"Bob!" cried I, "my dear Bob, I am delighted to see you;--what on earth
has brought you here?"
"A gig and a foundered mare," replied the matter-of-fact M'Corkindale.
"The fact is, that I was anxious to hear about your canvass; and, as
there was nothing to do in Glasgow--by the way, Dunshunner, the banks
have put on the screw again--I resolved to satisfy my own curiosity in
person. I arrived this morning, and Miss Binkie has been kind enough to
ask me to stay breakfast."
"I am sure both papa and I are always happy to see Mr M'Corkindale,"
said Margaret impressively.
"I am afraid," said I, "that I have interrupted your music: I did not
know, M'Corkindale, that you were so eminent a performer."
"I hold with Aristotle," replied Bob modestly, "that music and political
economy are at the head of all the sciences. But it is very seldom that
one can meet with so accomplished a partner as Miss Binkie."
"Oh, ho," thought I. But here the entrance of the Provost diverted the
conversation, and we all sat down to breakfast. Old Binkie was evidently
dying to know the result of my interview on the previous evening, but I
was determined to keep him in the dark. Bob fed like an ogre, and made
prodigious efforts to be polite.
After breakfast, on the pretext of business we went out for a walk. The
economist lighted his cigar.
"Snug quarters these, Dunshunner, at the Provost's."
"Very. But, Bob, things are looking rather well here. I had a
negotiation last night which has as good as settled the business."
"I am very glad to hear it.--Nice girl, Miss Binkie; very pretty eyes,
and a good foot and ankle."
"An unexceptionable instep. What do you think!--I have actually
discovered the Clique at last."
"You don't say so! Do you think old Binkie has saved money?"
"I am sure he has. I look upon Dreepdaily as pretty safe now; and I
propose going over this afternoon to Drouthielaw. What would you
recommend?"
"I think you are quite right; but somebody should stay here to look
after your interests. There is no depending upon these fellows. I'll
tell you what--while you are at Drouthielaw I shall remain here, and
occupy your quarters. The Committee will require some man of business to
drill them in, and I don't care if I spare you the time."
I highly applauded this generous resolution; at the same time I was not
altogether blind to the motive. Bob, though an excellent fellow in the
main, did not usually sacrifice himself to his friends, and I began to
suspect that Maggie Binkie--with whom, by the way, he had some previous
acquaintance--was somehow or other connected with his enthusiasm. As
matters stood, I of course entertained no objection: on the contrary, I
thought it no breach of confidence to repeat the history of the
nest-egg.
Bob pricked up his ears.
"Indeed!" said he; "that is a fair figure as times go; and to judge from
appearances, the stock in trade must be valuable."
"Cargoes of sugar," said I, "oceans of rum, and no end whatever of
molasses!"
"A very creditable chairman, indeed, for your Committee, Dunshunner,"
replied Bob. "Then I presume you agree that I should stay here, whilst
you prosecute your canvass?"
I assented, and we returned to the house. In the course of the forenoon
the list of my Committee was published, and, to the great joy of the
Provost, the names of Thomas Gill, Alexander M'Auslan, and Simon Shanks
appeared. He could not, for the life of him, understand how they had all
come forward so readily. A meeting of my friends was afterwards held, at
which I delivered a short harangue upon the constitution of 1688, which
seemed to give general satisfaction; and before I left the room, I had
the pleasure of seeing the Committee organised, with Bob officiating as
secretary. It was the opinion of every one that Pozzlethwaite had not a
chance. I then partook of a light luncheon, and after bidding farewell
to Miss Binkie, who, on the whole, seemed to take matters very coolly, I
drove off for Drouthielaw. I need not relate my adventures in that
respectable burgh. They were devoid of anything like interest, and not
quite so satisfactory in their result as I could have wished. However,
the name of Gills was known even at that distance, and his views had
considerable weight with some of the religious denominations. So far as
I was concerned, I had no sinecure of it. It cost me three nights' hard
drinking to conciliate the leaders of the Anabaptists, and at least
three more before the chiefs of the Antinomians would surrender. As to
the Old Light gentry, I gave them up in despair, for I could not hope to
have survived the consequences of so serious a conflict.