LABYRINTHS
How many people should you say could be packed into a three-hundred foot
barkantine-rigged steam yacht, capable of fourteen knots under steam
alone, for a night in late June, presumably hot, anchored in a noisy
estuary off Long Island Sound without making them all wish they had
never been born? We ourselves should hate to have to answer the question
offhand. So did Aunt Cecilia, whom it concerned more closely than any
one else, and she did not have to answer it offhand at all, having all
the available statistics within reach. In fact, she had spent the best
part of one hot New York June morning over it already, sitting in her
darkened front drawing-room because it was the coolest room in the
house, amid ghost-like furniture whose drab slip-covers concealed
nothing less than real Louis Quinze. On her lap--or what Uncle James
said if she didn't look out wouldn't be her lap very long--she held a
magazine and over the magazine an expensive piece of letter-paper, on
one leaf of which was a list of names and on the other a plan drawn in
wobbly and unarchitectural lines--obviously a memory sketch of the
sleeping accommodations of the _Halcyone_. Near what even in the sketch
was undoubtedly the largest and most comfortable of the _Halcyone's_
cabins she had written in firm unmistakable letters the word "Me," and
opposite two other rooms she had inscribed in only slightly less bold
characters the initials "H. and M." and "J. and B." So far so good; why
not go on thus as long as the list or the cabins held and consider the
problem solved? It wasn't as simple as that, it seemed. Some of the
people hadn't been asked, or might be asked only if there was room
enough, and the boys might bring in people at the last moment; it was
very confusing. And not even the extent of the sleeping accommodations
was as constant as might have been desired. It was ridiculous, of
course, but even after all these years she could not be quite sure
whether there were two little single rooms down by the galley skylight
or only one. She was practically sure there were two, but suppose she
were mistaken? And then, if it came to that, the boys and almost as many
friends as they cared to bring might sleep on the smoking-room sofas....
"No ... no, I'm not sure how wise that would be," she mused, certain
things she had seen and been told of boat-race celebrations straying
into her mind. "The smoking-room cushions have only just been
covered...."
A ring at the doorbell. She glanced up at a pierglass (also Louis
Quinze) opposite her and strained her eyes at its mosquito-netting
covered surface. Her hair was far from what she could have wished; she
hoped it would be no one she would have to see. Oh, Beatrice.
"Howdy do, dear," said Aunt Cecilia, relieved. "I was just thinking of
you. I'm trying to plan out about the boat-race; it's less than a week
off now."
Beatrice sank languidly down on the other end of Aunt Cecilia's sofa.
She was much hotter and more fatigued than Aunt Cecilia, but no one
would have guessed it to look at her. Her clothes lay coolly and
caressingly on her; not a hair seemed out of place.
"You see," went on the other, "it's rather difficult to arrange, on
account of there being so many unmarried people--just the Lyles and the
MacGraths and George Grainger for us older ones and the rest all
Muffins' and Jack's friends. I think we shall work out all right,
though, with two rooms at the Griswold and the smoking-room to overflow
into. I'm tired of bothering about it. Tell me about yourself."
"Nothing much," answered Beatrice. "I much prefer hearing about you. By
the way--about the races. I just dropped in to tell you about Tommy
Clairloch. He's coming. You did tell me to ask him, didn't you?"
"Yes ... oh, yes, of course. I had forgotten about Lord Clairloch for
the moment. I thought he was going west the middle of the month."
"He was, but he didn't. Tommy's rather a fool." Tommy, it may be
mentioned, was in the process of improving himself by making a trip
around the world, going westward. He had left home in April and so far
Upper Montclair was his farthest point west. As Beatrice said, Tommy was
rather a fool.
"Oh, not a bit ... only.... By the bye, dear, do you happen to remember
whether there are one or two rooms down that little hall by the galley?"
"Two, as I remember it. But don't bother about Tommy. Really, Aunt
Cecilia, don't. He needn't come at all--I'll tell him he can't."
"Of course he must come.... That's it--I'll put him in the other little
single room and tell the boys that they and any one else they ask from
now on must go to the Griswold or sleep in the smoking-room. I'm glad to
have it settled."
Aunt Cecilia beamed as one does when a difficult problem is solved. It
occurred to her that Beatrice might beam back at her just a tiny bit, if
only in mock sympathy. Especially as it was her guest.... But Beatrice
remained just as casual as before, sitting easily but immovably in her
corner of the sofa with her parasol lying lightly in her slim gloved
hands. Aunt Cecilia noticed those hands rather especially; it seemed
scarcely human to keep one's gloves on in the house on a day like this!
Characteristically, she gave her thought outlet in words.
"Do take off your gloves and things, dear, and make yourself
comfortable! Such a day! New York in June is frightful--eighty-eight
yesterday, and Heaven knows what it will be to-day. You'll stay to
lunch, won't you?"
"Thanks, perhaps I will," replied Beatrice listlessly.
"I never have stayed in town so late in June," ran on Aunt Cecilia, "but
I thought I wouldn't open the Tarrytown house this spring--it's only for
six weeks and it is so much extra trouble.... I shall take the yacht and
the boys directly on up to Bar Harbor afterward; we should love to have
you come with us, if you feel like leaving James--you're looking so
fagged. You must both come and pay us a long visit later on, though I
suppose with Harry and Madge in the Berkshires you'll be running up
there quite often for week-ends...."
Beatrice stirred a little. "Thanks, Aunt Cecilia, but I don't mind the
heat especially. If James can bear it, I can, I suppose. I expect to
stay here most of the summer."
She was perfectly courteous, and yet it suddenly occurred to Aunt
Cecilia that perhaps she wouldn't be quite so free in showering
invitations on Beatrice and James for a while. There was that about her,
as she sat there.... Languid, that was the word; there had been a
certain languor, not due to hot weather, in Beatrice's reception of most
of her favors, now that she came to think of it. There had been that
wedding trip in the _Halcyone_, to begin with. Both she and James had
shown a due amount of gratitude, but neither, when you came right down
to it, had given any particular evidence of having enjoyed it.
Everything was as it should be, no doubt, but--one didn't lend yachts
without expecting to have them enjoyed!
"That trip cost me over five thousand dollars," she had remarked to her
husband shortly after the return of the bridal pair. "Of course I don't
grudge it, but five thousand dollars is a good deal of money, and I'd
rather have subscribed it to the Organized Charities than feel I was
spending it to give those two something they didn't want!"
Aunt Cecilia gazed anxiously at Beatrice for a moment, memories of this
sort floating vaguely through her mind. She scented trouble, somewhere.
The next minute she thought she had diagnosed it.
"You're bored, dear, that's the long and the short of it, and I think I
know what's the matter. I'm not sure that I didn't feel a little that
way myself, at the very first. But I soon got over it. My dear, there's
nothing in the world like a baby to drive away boredom...."
Beatrice tapped with the end of her parasol on what in winter would have
been a pink and gray texture from Aubusson's storied looms but was now
simply a parquet flooring. But she did not blush, not in the slightest
degree.
"Yes," she answered, a trifle wearily, "I daresay you're right.
Sometimes I think I would like to have a baby. It doesn't seem to come,
though.... After all, it's rather early to bother, isn't it?"
"Oh, I don't want you to _bother_--! Only--" She was just a little taken
aback. This barren agreement, this lack of natural shyness, of blushes!
It was unprecedented in her experience.
"Only what, Aunt Cecilia?"
"Only--it's a sure cure for being bored. But Beatrice, there must be
others, while you're waiting. What about your studies, your work? You
haven't done much of that since you came home from abroad, have you?
It's too late to begin anything this summer, of course, but next autumn
I should think you'd like to take it up again, especially as you don't
care so much for society, and I'm sure I don't blame you for that...."
She beamed momentarily on her niece, who this time smiled back ever so
slightly in return. "After all, it's nice to be of some use in the
world, isn't it?"
Why not have left it there, on that secure impregnable pinnacle? Why
weaken her position by giving voice to that silly unprovoked fancy that
had hung about the back of her mind since the beginning of the
interview, or very near it? We can't explain, unless the sudden
suspicion that Beatrice had smiled less with than at her, and the sight
of her sitting there so beautiful and aloof, so well-bredly acquiescent
and so emotionally intangible, exercised an ignoble influence over her.
There is a sort of silent acquiescence that is very irritating.... And
after all, was the impulse so ignoble? A word of warning of the most
affectionate kind, prompted by the keenest sympathy--surely it was
wholly Beatrice's fault if anything went wrong!
"More than that, my dear, there's a certain danger in being too idle--a
danger I'm sure you're as free from as any one could be, but you know
what the psalm says!" (Or was it original with Isaac Watts? However!)
"Of course marriage isn't so easy, especially in the first year, and
especially if there are no children--what with the husband away at work
all day and tired to death and like as not cross as a bear when he comes
home in the evening--I know!--a young wife can't be blamed for feeling a
little out of sorts sometimes. And then along comes another man...."
Here Beatrice, to use a sporting expression, froze. From that moment it
ceased to be question of two women talking together and became a matter
of Aunt Cecilia apostrophizing a statue; a modern conception, say, of
Artemis. Marble itself could not be more unresponsive than Beatrice when
people tried to "get at her." It was not rudeness, it was not coldness,
it was not even primarily self-consciousness; it was the natural
inability to speak of matters deeply concerning oneself which people of
Aunt Cecilia's temperament can never fully understand.
"Of course other men have things to offer that husbands have not,
especially if they are free in the daytime and are nice and good-natured
and sympathetic, and often a young wife may be deceived into valuing
these things more than the love of her husband. They are all at their
best on the surface, while her husband's best is all below it. And that,
I think, is the way most married unhappinesses begin; not in
unfaithfulness or in jealousy or in loss of love, but merely in
idleness. I've seen it happen so often, dear, that you must be able to
understand why I never like to see a young wife with too little to
do...."
For Aunt Cecilia was personal, you see, to a degree. Did she imagine she
was making things any easier, Beatrice asked herself with a little burst
of humorous contempt, by her generalities and her third persons and her
"young wives"? If she had been perfectly frank, if she had come out and
said, "Beatrice, if you don't look out you'll be falling in love with
Tommy Clairloch," there was a possibility that Beatrice could have
answered her, even confided in her; at least put things on a
conversational footing. But as for talking about her own case in this
degrading disguise, dramatizing herself as a "young wife"--!
She remained silent long enough to make it obvious that her silence was
her real reply. Then she said "Yes, indeed, perfectly," and Aunt Cecilia
rather tardily became aware of her niece's metamorphosis into the modern
Artemis. She made a flurried attempt to give her own remarks,
retrospectively, something of the Artemis quality; to place a pedestal,
as it were, on which to take her own stand as a modern conception of
Pallas Athene.
"I hope, my dear, you don't think I mean anything...."
"Not at all," said Beatrice kindly but firmly. "And now if you don't
mind, Aunt Cecilia, I think I'll go up and get ready for luncheon."
But Aunt Cecilia was afraid she had gone too far.
* * * * *
A week later came the gathering of the clans at New London for the
Yale-Harvard boat-race. Aunt Cecilia had not been to a race in years.
Races, you see, were not in a class with graduations; they were
optional, works of supererogation. But this year, in addition to one of
the largest yachts extant and money that fairly groaned to be put into
circulation, she had two boys in college, and altogether it seemed worth
while "making an effort." And the effort once made there was a certain
pleasure in doing the thing really well, in taking one's place as one of
the great Yale families of the country. So on the afternoon before the
race the _Halcyone_ was anchored in a conspicuous place in the harbor,
where she loomed large and majestic among the smaller craft, and a
tremendous blue flag with a white Y on it was hoisted between two of the
masts. People from the shore looked for her name with field glasses and
pointed her out to each other as "the Wimbourne yacht" with a note of
awe in their voices.
"It's like being on the _Victory_ at Trafalgar, as far as
conspicuousness goes," said Harry on his arrival. "Or rather," he added
magnificently, "like being on Cleopatra's galley at Actium."
"Absit omen," remarked Uncle James, and the others laughed, but his wife
paid no attention to him. She was not above a little thrill of pride and
pleasure herself.
Muffins and Jack and their friends were much in evidence; the party was
primarily for the "young people." They kept mostly to themselves,
dancing and singing and making personal remarks together, always
detaching themselves with a polite attentive quirk of the head when an
older person addressed them. Nice children, all of them. Muffins and
Jack were of the right sort, emphatically, and their friends were
obviously--not too obviously, but just obviously enough--chosen with
nice discriminating taste. Jack especially gave one the impression of
having a fine appreciation of people and things; that of Muffins was
based on rather broad athletic lines. Muffins played football. Ruth, the
brains of the family, was not present; we forget whether she was running
a summer camp for cash girls or exploring the headwaters of the Yukon;
it was something modern and expensive. Ruth was not extensively missed
by her brothers.
They all dined hilariously together on the yacht and repaired to the
Griswold afterward to dance and revel through the evening. All, that is,
except Beatrice and James; they did not arrive till well on in the
evening, James having been unable to leave town till his day's work was
over. The launch with Uncle James in it went to the station to meet them
and brought them directly back to the yacht to get settled and tidied
up; they could go on over to the Griswold for a bit, if they weren't too
tired.
"How about it?" inquired James as he stood peering at his watch in the
dim light on deck.
"Oh, just as you like," said Beatrice.
"Well, I don't care. Say something."
Beatrice was rather tired.... Well, perhaps it was better that way; they
would have another chance to see all they wanted to-morrow night. This
from Uncle James, who thought he would drop over there and relieve Aunt
Cecilia, who had been chaperoning since dinner.
His head disappeared over the ship's side. James walked silently off to
unpack. Beatrice sank into a wicker armchair and dropped her head on her
hands....
It seemed as if scarcely a moment had passed when she became aware of
the launch again coming up alongside and voices floating up from
it--Aunt Cecilia and Lord Clairloch. Salutations ensued, avuncular and
friendly. Aunt Cecilia was tired, but very cheerful. She buzzed off
presently to see about something and Lord Clairloch dropped down by
Beatrice.
Tommy was very cheerful also, apparently much impressed by what he had
seen at the Griswold. "I say, a jolly bean-feast, that! Never saw such
dancin' or drinkin' in my life, and I've lived a bit! They keep 'em
apart, too--that's the best of it; no trouble about takin' a gell,
provided she don't go to the bar, which ain't likely.... Jove, we've got
nothing like it in England! Rippin' looking lot of gells, rippin'
fellahs, rippin' good songs, too. All seem to enjoy 'emselves so
much!--I say, these Yankees can teach us a thing or two about havin' a
good time--wot?"
Beatrice listened with a growing sense of amusement. Tommy always
refreshed her when he was in a mood like this; he kept his youth so
wonderfully, in spite of all his super-sophistication; he was such a boy
still. Tommy never seemed to mind being hot or tired; Tommy was always
ready for anything; Tommy was not the sort that came home at six o'clock
and sank into the evening paper without a word--She stopped that line of
thought and asked a question.
"Why did you leave it all, Tommy, if it amused you so?"
"Oh, had enough of it--been there since dinner. Beside, I heard you'd
come. Thought I'd buzz over and see how you were gettin' on. Have a
horrid journey?"
Beatrice nodded.
"Hot?"
"No, not especially." They were silent a moment. Tommy opened his mouth
to ask a question and shut it again. And then, walking like a ghost
across their silence, appeared the figure of James, stalking aimlessly
down the deck. He nodded briefly to Tommy and walked off again.
The effect, in view of the turn of their conversation, of Tommy's
unasked question, was almost that of a spectral apparition. The
half-light of the deck, James' silence and the noiseless tread of his
rubber-soled shoes had in themselves an uncanny quality. Presently Tommy
whistled softly, as though to break the spell.
"Whew! I say, is he often like that?"
Beatrice laughed. Tommy _was_ refreshing! "Lately, yes. Do you know,"
she added, "he only spoke twice on the way up here--once to ask me if I
was ready to have dinner, and once what I wanted for dinner?" Her tone
was one of suppressed amusement, caught from Tommy; but before her
remark was fairly finished something rather like a note of alarm rang
through her. Why had she said that? It wasn't so frightfully amusing,
come to think of it. Her pleasure, she saw in a flash, came not from the
remark itself but from her anticipation of seeing Tommy respond to
it....
That was rather serious, wasn't it? Just how serious, she wondered? Joy
in seeing another man respond to a disparaging remark about her
husband--that was what it came to! For the first time in her life she
had the sensation of reveling in a stolen joy. For of course Tommy did
respond, beautifully--too beautifully. "Oh, I say! Really, now! That
_is_ a trifle strong, wot?" and so on. He was doing exactly what she had
meant him to, and there was a separate pleasure in that--a zest of
power!
Heavens!
For the first time she began to feel a trifle nervous about Tommy. Was
Aunt Cecilia right? Had all her careful euphemisms about young wives
some basis of justification as applied to her own case? She and
Tommy.... Well, she and Tommy?... Half an hour ago she could have placed
them perfectly; now her sight was a trifle blurred. There was not time
to think it all out now, anyway; another boatload of people from the
shore was even now crowding up the gangway; to-morrow she would go into
the matter thoroughly with herself and put things, whatever they might
be, on a definite business footing. To-night, even, if she did not
sleep....
Everybody was back, it appeared, and things shortly became festive.
There were drinks and sandwiches and entertaining reminiscences of the
evening from the young people, lasting till bedtime. Thought was out of
the question.
Once undressed and in bed, to be sure, there was better opportunity. She
slipped comfortably down between the sheets; what a blessing that the
night was not too hot, after all! Aunt Cecilia had said ... what was it
that Aunt Cecilia had said? Something about a young wife--a young wife
ought to have something to do. Of course. These were linen sheets, by
the way, and the very finest linen, at that. Aunt Cecilia did know how
to do things.... What was it? Something more, she fancied, about valuing
something more than something else. Tommy Clairloch was the first thing,
she was sure of that. Aunt Cecilia had not said it, but she had meant
it.... She was going to sleep, after all; what a blessing!... What was
that other thing? It was hard to think when one was so comfortable. Oh,
yes, she had it now--the love of a husband!
Whose husband? The young wife's, to be sure. And who was the young wife?
She herself, obviously. But--the thought flared up like a strong lamp
through the thickening fog of her brain--_her_ husband did not love her!
She and James were not like ordinary young wives and husbands.... How
silly of her not to have seen that before! That changed everything, of
course. Aunt Cecilia was on a wrong track altogether; her--what was the
word?--her premises were false. That threw out her whole
argument--everything--including that about Tommy.
Gradually the sudden illumination of that thought faded in the
evergrowing shadow of sleep. Now only vague wisps of ideas floated
through her mind; even those were but pale reflections of that one
truth; Aunt Cecilia was mistaken.... Aunt Cecilia was wrong.... It was
all right about Tommy.... Tommy was all right.... Aunt Cecilia ... was
wrong....
Psychologists tell us that ideas make most impression on the mind when
they are introduced into it during that indefinite period between
sleeping and waking; they then become incorporated directly with our
subconscious selves without having to pass through the usual tortuous
channels of consciousness and reason. And the sub-consciousness, as
every one knows, is a most intimate and important place; once an idea is
firmly grounded there it has become substantially a part of our being,
so far as we can tell from our incomplete knowledge of our own ideal
existence. We are not sure that a single introduction of this sort can
give an idea a good social standing in the realm of sub-consciousness;
probably not. But it can help; it can give it at least a nodding
acquaintance there. Certain it is, at any rate, that when Beatrice awoke
next morning it was with a mind at least somewhat more willing than
previously to take for granted, as part of the natural order of things,
the fact of the inherent wrongness of Aunt Cecilia and its corollary,
the innate rightness of Tommy. (Possibly this corollary would not have
appeared so inevitable if the matter had all been threshed out in
reason; they are rather lax about logic and such things in
sub-consciousness, making a good introduction the one criterion of
acceptance.) With the net material result that Beatrice was less
inclined than ever to be nervous about Aunt Cecilia and also less
inclined than ever to be nervous about Tommy.
The day began in an atmosphere of not unpleasant indolence. Breakfast
was late and was followed by the best cigarette of the day on
deck--Beatrice's smoking was the secret admiration and envy of all the
female half of the younger section. A cool breeze ruffled the harbor and
gathered in a flock of clouds from the Sound that left only just enough
sunlight to bring out the brilliant colors of the little flags all the
yachts had strung up between their mastheads and down again to bowsprit
and stern. It was rather pleasant to sit and watch these and other
things; the continual small traffic of the harbor, the occasional
arrivals of more slim white yachts.
Presently Harry and Madge and Beatrice and Tommy and one or two others
made a short excursion to the shore, for no other apparent reason than
to join the procession of smartly dressed people that for one day in the
year convert the quiet town of New London into one of the gayest-looking
places on earth. Tommy was much in evidence here, fairly crowing with
delight over each new thing that pleased him. It was all Harry could do
to keep him from swathing himself in blue; Tommy had become an
enthusiastic Yalensian. He had spent a week-end with Harry in New Haven
during the spring; he had driven with Aunt Selina in the victoria, he
had been shown the university and had met a number of pretty gells and
rippin' fellahs; what business was it of Wiggers if he wanted to wave a
blue flag? Wiggers ought to feel jolly complimented, instead of makin' a
row!
"You'd say just the same about Harvard, if you went there--the people
are just as nice," said Harry. "Besides, Harvard will probably win. You
may buy us each a blue feather, if you like, and call it square at
that."
Beatrice smiled, but she thought Harry a little hard.
"Never mind, Tommy," said she; "you can sit by me at the race this
afternoon and we'll both scream our lungs out, if we want."
That was substantially what happened. Luncheon on the yacht--an enormous
"standing" affair, with lots of extra people--was followed by a general
exodus to the observation trains. Tommy had never seen an observation
train before and was full of curiosity. They didn't have them at Henley.
It was all jolly different from Henley, wasn't it, though? As they
walked through the railroad yards to their car he was inclined to think
it wasn't as good fun as Henley. One missed the punts, and all that.
Once seated in the car, however, with an unobstructed view of the river,
it was a little better, and by the time the crews had rowed up to the
starting-point he had almost come round to the American point of view.
It might not be so jolly as Henley, quite, but Jove! one could see!
Tommy sat on Beatrice's left; on her right was Mr. MacGrath and beyond
him again was Aunt Cecilia. The others were scattered through the train
in similar mixed groups. Beatrice thought it a good idea to split up
that way.... She began to have an idea she was going to enjoy this race.
So she did, too, more than she had enjoyed anything in--oh, months! She
couldn't remember much about it afterward, though she did remember who
won, which is more than we do. She had a recollection, to begin with, of
Tommy joining in lustily in every Yale cheer and of Mr. MacGrath trying
not to thump Aunt Cecilia on the back at an important moment and
thumping herself instead. He apologized very nicely. Presently Tommy
committed the same offense against her and neglected to apologize
entirely, but she didn't mind in the least. (That was the sort of race
it was.) Perhaps there lurked in the back of her brain a certain sense
of joy in the omission.... She herself became infected with Tommy-mania
before long.
And the spectacle was an exhilarating one, under any circumstances. The
noble sweep of the river, the keen blue of the water and sky, the green
of the hills, the brilliant double row of yachts and the general
atmosphere of hilarity were enough to make one glad to be alive. And
then the excitement of the race itself, the sense of participation the
motion of the train gave one, the almost painful fascination of watching
those two little sets of automatons, the involuntary, electric response
from the crowd when one or the other of them pulled a little into the
lead, the thrill of bursting out from behind some temporary obstruction
and seeing them down there, quite near now, entering the last half-mile
with one's own crew just a little, ever so little, ahead! From which
moment it seemed both a second and an age to the finish, that terrific,
heart-raising finish, with its riot of waving colors and its pandemonium
of toots from the water and cries from the land....
On the whole, we suppose Yale must have won that race. For after all, it
isn't quite so pleasant when the other crew wins, no matter how close
the race was and no matter how good a loser one happens to be. Tommy was
as good a loser as you could easily find, but not even he could have
been as cheerful as all that on the ride back if his crew had lost.
Indeed, cheerful was rather a weak word with which to describe Tommy by
this time. Beatrice, doing her best to calm him down, became aware, from
glances shot at him from various--mostly feminine--directions, that some
people would have characterized his condition by a much sharper and
shorter word. Involuntarily, almost against her will, Beatrice
indignantly repelled their accusation. What nonsense! They didn't know
Tommy; he was naturally like this. Though there had been champagne at
lunch, of course....
Rather an interesting experience, that ride back to town. The enforced
inactivity gave one a chance to think, in the intervals of tugging at
Tommy's coat tails. Why should she be enjoying herself so ridiculously?
Whole-souled enjoyment was not a thing she had been accustomed to
during the last few years, at any rate since.... Yes, she had enjoyed
herself more this afternoon than at any time since she had been married;
but what of it? She attached no blame to James; it was not James' fault;
nothing was anybody's fault. She was taking a little, a very little fun
where she found it, that was all.
The train pulled up in the yards and thought was discontinued. It was
resumed a few minutes later, however, as they sat in the launch, waiting
for the rest of their party to join them. She happened to be sitting
just opposite to Aunt Cecilia, on whom her eyes idly rested. Aunt
Cecilia! What about Aunt Cecilia? She was wrong, of course! She did not
understand; she was wrong! Tommy was all right....
So sub-consciousness got in its little work, till conscious reason
sallied forth and routed it. Oh, why, Beatrice asked herself, with a
mental motion as of throwing off an entangling substance, why all this
nonsensical worrying about a danger that did not exist? What danger was
there of her--making a fool of herself over Tommy when.... She did not
follow that thought out; it was better to leave those "when" clauses
hanging in the air, when possible.
But Tommy! Poor, good-natured, simple, ineffective Tommy!
She resolved to think no longer, but to give herself entirely over to
what slight pleasure the moment had to offer She dressed and dined in
good spirits, with a sense of anticipation almost childlike in its
innocence.
After dinner there was a general exodus to the Griswold. From the moment
she stepped on to the hotel dock, surrounded by its crowd of cheerfully
bobbing launches, she became infected with the prevailing spirit of
gaiety. Tommy was right; Americans did know how to enjoy themselves!
They made their way up the lawn toward the big brilliant hotel. They
reached the door of the ballroom and stopped a moment. In this interval
Beatrice became aware of James at her elbow.
"You'd better dance with me first," he said.
They danced two or three times around the room in complete silence.
Beatrice did not in the least mind dancing with James, indeed she rather
enjoyed it, he danced so well. But why address her in that sepulchral
tone; why make his invitation sound like a threat; why not at least put
up a pretense of making duty a pleasure? She was conscious of a slight
rise of irritation; if James was going to be a skeleton at this
feast.... She was relieved when he handed her over to one of the other
men.
But James had no intention of being a skeleton. He went back to bed
before any of the others, alleging a headache. Beatrice learned this
indirectly, through Harry, and felt rather disappointed. She would have
preferred to have him remain and enjoy himself; she did not bother to
explain why. But he was apparently determined that nothing should make
him enjoy himself. James was rather irritating, sometimes. She said as
much, to Harry, who assented, frowning slightly. She saw a chance to get
in some of the small work of destiny-fighting.
"He's not been at all natural lately," she said; "I've been quite
worried about him. I wish you'd watch him and tell me what to do about
it. I feel rather to blame for it, naturally."
"Oh, I wouldn't worry," said Harry. "Working in the city in summer is
hard on any one, of course."
"I'm afraid it's more than that, and I want your help. You understand
James better than I do, I think."
"No, you're wrong there. I don't understand James at all. No one really
understands any one else, as a matter of fact. We think we do, but we
don't. The very simplest nature is a regular Cretan labyrinth."
"But a wife ought to be the Theseus of her husband's labyrinth, that's
the point."
"Perhaps you're right. Here's hoping you don't find a minotaur in the
middle!"
She didn't worry much about it, however. Tommy cut in soon afterward,
and they didn't talk about James or labyrinths either. Tommy had not
danced with her before that evening. She was going to say something
about that, but decided not to. It was too jolly dancing to talk,
really. Tommy danced very well--quite as well as James. They danced the
contemporary American dances for some time and then they broke into an
old-fashioned whirling English waltz; the dance they had both been
brought up on. It brought memories to the minds of both; they felt old
times and places creeping back on them.
"Do you remember the last time we did this?" asked Tommy presently.
"At the Dimchurches', the winter before I came here."
"Didn't last long, though. You were the prettiest gell there."
"I suppose I was.--And you were just Tommy Erskine then, and awfully
ineligible!"
What an absurd remark to make! If she was going to let her tongue run
away with her like that, she had better keep her mouth shut.
They danced on in silence for some time, rested in the cool of a
verandah and then danced again. The room was already beginning to empty
somewhat, making dancing more of a pleasure than ever. They danced on
till they were tired and then sat out again.
"We might take a stroll about," suggested Tommy presently.
They walked down the steps and out on the lawn. Presently they came near
the windows of the bar, which was on the ground floor of the hotel, and
stopped to look in for a moment. It was a lively scene. The room--a
great white bare place--was filled with men laughing and shouting and
slapping each other on the shoulder and bellowing college songs, all in
a thick blue haze of tobacco smoke. They were also drinking, and
Beatrice noticed that when they had drained their glasses they
invariably threw them carelessly on the floor, adding a new sound to the
din and fairly paving the room with broken glass. Many of them were
mildly intoxicated, but none were actually drunk; the whole sounded the
note of celebration in the ballroom strengthened and masculinized. It
had its effect on Beatrice; it was a pleasure to think that one lived in
a world where people could enjoy themselves thoroughly and uproariously
and without becoming bestial about it.
"It's really very jolly, isn't it?" she said at last.
"Oh, rippin'," assented Tommy.
"Perhaps you'd rather go in there now?"
"No, no. Don't know the fellahs--I should feel out of it. Wiggers was
right.--Besides, I'd rather stay with you."
Beatrice wondered if she had intended to make Tommy say that.
They wandered off through the hotel grounds and saw other couples doing
the same. Doing rather more, in fact. After some search they found an
empty bench and sat down.
Tommy's education had been in many ways a narrow one, but it had
equipped him perfectly for making use of such situations as the present.
He turned about on the bench, leaning one arm on its back and facing
Beatrice's profile squarely.
"Jove!" he said reminiscently. "Haven't done that since Oxford."
"What?"
"That." He waved his head in the direction of the well populated
shadows.
"Oh," answered Beatrice carelessly. The profound lack of interest in her
tone had its effect.
"I did it to you once, by Jove! Remember?"
"No. You never did, Tommy; you know that perfectly well."
"Well, I will now, then!"
He did.
The next moment he rather wished he had not, Beatrice's slow smile of
contemptuous tolerance made him feel like such a child.
"Tommy, it's only you, of course, so it really doesn't matter, but if
you try to do that again I shall punish you."
Her power over him was as comforting to her as it was disconcerting to
him. For a moment; after that she felt a pang of irritation. The idea of
a married woman being kissed by a man not her husband was in itself
rather revolting, and the thought that she was that married woman stung.
As if that was not enough, the thought came to her that she could have
stopped Tommy at any moment and had not. Had she not, in fact,
secretly--even to herself--intended that he should do that very thing
when they first sat down? She had used her power for contemptible ends.
The thought that after all it was only poor ineffectual Tommy only
increased her sense of degradation. All her pleasure had fled.
"Come along, Tommy," she said, rising; "it's time to go home."
It was indeed late--long after twelve. The launch, as she remembered it,
was to make its last trip back to the yacht at half-past; they would be
just in time. Tommy walked the length of the dock two or three times
calling "Halcyone! Halcyone!" but there was no response from the already
dwindling throng of launches. They sat down to wait, both moody and
silent.
From the very first Beatrice suspected that they had been left. It was
the natural sequence of the preceding episode; that was the way things
happened. Her sense of disillusionment and irritation increased. The
dancing had stopped, but the drinking continued; people were wandering
or lying about the lawn in disgusting states of intoxication. What had
been a joyous bacchanal had degenerated into a horrid saturnalia. Once,
as they walked down to see if the launch had arrived, a man stumbled by
them with a lewd remark. Beatrice remained on the verandah and made
Tommy go down alone after that. His mournful "Halcyone!" floated up like
the cry of a soul from Acheron.
By one o'clock or so it became obvious to everybody that they had been
forgotten, and Beatrice instructed Tommy to hire any boat he could get
to take them to the yacht. He had a long interview with the chief
nautical employee of the hotel, who promised to see what he could do.
That appeared to be singularly little. At last, with altered views of
the American way of running things, Beatrice went down herself and
talked to him. He would do what he could, but.... It was two o'clock;
the dock was deserted.
Beatrice knew he would do nothing and bethought herself of the two rooms
in the hotel that Aunt Cecilia had engaged. Her impression was that they
were not being used to-night; their party was smaller than it had been
the night before. She went to the hotel office and asked if there were
some rooms engaged for Mrs. James Wimbourne and if they were already
occupied. After some research it appeared that there were and they
weren't. Well, Beatrice and Tommy would take them. The night clerk was
interested. He understood the situation perfectly and refrained from
commenting upon their lack of baggage.
So Beatrice was shown into one room and Tommy into the other, the two
parting with a brief good night in the corridor.
The first thing Beatrice noticed about the room was that there was a
communicating door between it and Tommy's room. She saw that there was a
bolt on her side, however, and made sure that it was shut.
Then she rang for a chambermaid and asked for a nightgown and
toothbrush.