[Illustration: "I SAY, THAT MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON SEEMS A JOLLY
WOMAN--WHAT?" "ISN'T SHE A LITTLE--ER--"
"NOT A BIT OF IT. A WOMAN OUGHT TO BE CHEERY, ESPECIALLY IN THESE TIMES."
"I SEE, DEAR."]
[Illustration: "WHAT ON EARTH--?"
"I'M MAKING A NEW HAT, DEAR. I SAW MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON WEARING ONE
VERY LIKE THIS."]
[Illustration: "GREAT HEAVENS! WHAT ARE YOU CUTTING YOUR NEW DRESS TO BITS
FOR?"
"IT'S ALL RIGHT, DEAR. MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON HAS ONE QUITE AS SHORT AS
THIS."]
[Illustration: "GOOD LORD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR FACE?"
"MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON ALWAYS MAKES UP A LITTLE WHEN SHE'S GOING OUT.
OH--I FORGOT TO TELL YOU--I HAVEN'T ORDERED ANY DINNER, AS I THOUGHT WE
MIGHT GO AND DINE AT A RESTAURANT."]
[Illustration: "AREN'T YOU MAKING YOURSELF RATHER CONSPICUOUS?"
"BUT I THOUGHT YOU LIKED CHEERY PEOPLE LIKE MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON."]
[Illustration: "I'M AWFULLY SORRY, DEAR. I OUGHT TO HAVE PRACTISED SMOKING.
I EXPECT MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON--"
"D---- MRS. DASHWOOD SPIFFINGTON!"
"VERY WELL, DEAR."]
* * * * *
[Illustration: THE PINCH OF WAR.
_Lady of the House_ (_War Profiteer's wife, forlornly_). "THEY'VE JUST
TAKEN OUR THIRD FOOTMAN; AND IF ANY MORE OF OUR MEN HAVE TO GO WE SHALL
CLOSE THE HOUSE AND LIVE AT THE RITZ UNTIL THE WAR IS
OVER--(_brightly_)--HOWEVER, WE MUST ALL SACRIFICE SOMETHING."]
* * * * *