It may be said, without offence to other cities, of much greater
consequence in the world, that our town of Dublin doth not want its due
proportion of folly, and vice, both native and imported; and as to those
imported, we have the advantage to receive them last, and consequently
after our happy manner to improve, and refine upon them.
But, because there are many effects of folly and vice among us, whereof
some are general, others confined to smaller numbers, and others again,
perhaps to a few individuals; there is a society lately established, who
at great expense, have erected an office of Intelligence, from which they
are to receive weekly information of all important events and
singularities, which this famous metropolis can furnish. Strict
injunctions are given to have the truest information: in order to which,
certain qualified persons are employed to attend upon duty in their
several posts; some at the play-house, others in churches, some at balls,
assemblies, coffee-houses, and meetings for quadrille,[2] some at the
several courts of justice, both spiritual and temporal, some at the
college, some upon my lord mayor, and aldermen in their public affairs;
lastly, some to converse with favourite chamber-maids, and to frequent
those ale-houses, and brandy-shops, where the footmen of great families
meet in a morning; only the barracks and Parliament-house are excepted;
because we have yet found no _enfans perdus_ bold enough to venture their
persons at either. Out of these and some other store-houses, we hope to
gather materials enough to inform, or divert, or correct, or vex the
town.
But as facts, passages, and adventures of all kinds, are like to have the
greatest share in our paper, whereof we cannot always answer for the
truth; due care shall be taken to have them applied to feigned names,
whereby all just offence will be removed; for if none be guilty, none
will have cause to blush or be angry; if otherwise, then the guilty
person is safe for the future upon his present amendment, and safe for
the present, from all but his own conscience.
There is another resolution taken among us, which I fear will give a
greater and more general discontent, and is of so singular a nature, that
I have hardly confidence enough to mention it, although it be absolutely
necessary by way of apology, for so bold and unpopular an attempt. But so
it is, that we have taken a desperate counsel to produce into the world
every distinguished action, either of justice, prudence, generosity,
charity, friendship, or public spirit, which comes well attested to us.
And although we shall neither here be so daring as to assign names, yet
we shall hardly forbear to give some hints, that perhaps to the great
displeasure of such deserving persons may endanger a discovery. For we
think that even virtue itself, should submit to such a mortification, as
by its visibility and example, will render it more useful to the world.
But however, the readers of these papers, need not be in pain of being
overcharged, with so dull and ungrateful a subject. And yet who knows,
but such an occasion may be offered to us, once in a year or two, after
we shall have settled a correspondence round the kingdom.
But after all our boasts of materials, sent us by our several emissaries,
we may probably soon fall short, if the town will not be pleased to lend
us further assistance toward entertaining itself. The world best knows
its own faults and virtues, and whatever is sent shall be faithfully
returned back, only a little embellished according to the custom of
authors. We do therefore demand and expect continual advertisements in
great numbers, to be sent to the printer of this paper, who hath employed
a judicious secretary to collect such as may be most useful for the
public.
And although we do not intend to expose our own persons by mentioning
names, yet we are so far from requiring the same caution in our
correspondents, that on the contrary, we expressly _charge_ and _command_
them, in all the facts they send us, to set down the names, titles, and
places of abode at length; together with a very particular description
of the persons, dresses, and dispositions of the several lords, ladies,
squires, madams, lawyers, gamesters, toupees, sots, wits, rakes, and
informers, whom they shall have occasion to mention; otherwise it will
not be possible for us to adjust our style to the different qualities,
and capacities of the persons concerned, and treat them with the respect
or familiarity, that may be due to their stations and characters, which
we are determined to observe with the utmost strictness, that none may
have cause to complain.
[Footnote 1: In the "Contents" to both the editions of 1729 and 1730,
this is called "Introduction." Each of the numbers has a special title in
this table, as follows:
No. I. Introduction.
II. The Inhospitable Temper of 'Squire Wether.
III. A Vindication of Mr. Gay, and the Beggar's Opera.
IV. The Folly of Gaming.
V. A Description of what the World calls Discretion.
VI. A Representation of the Present Condition of Ireland.
VII. The Character of Corusodes and Eugenio.
VIII. A Dialogue between Mullinix and Timothy.
IX. The foolish Methods of Education among the Nobility.
X. Tim and Gay's Fables.
XI. Proposals in Prose and Verse for, An Universal View of all the
eminent Writers on the Holy Scriptures, &c.
XII. Sir Ralph the Patriot turned Courtier.
XIII. The Art of Story-Telling.
XIV. Prometheus's Art of Man-making: And the Tale of the T--d.
XV. The Services the Drapier has done his Country, and the Steps taken to
ruin it.
XVI. The Adventures of the three Brothers, George, Patrick, and Andrew.
XVII. The Marks of Ireland's Poverty, shewn to be evident Proofs of its
Riches.
XVIII. St. Andrew's Day, and the Drapier's Birth-Day.
XIX. The Hardships of the Irish being deprived of their Silver, and
decoyed into America.
[XX. Dean Smedley, gone to seek his Fortune.
The Pheasant and the Lark. A Fable.]-[T.S.]]
[Footnote 2: A fashionable card game of the time. See also Swift's poem,
"The Journal of a Modern Lady" (Aldine edition, vol. i., pp. 214-23), and
"A New Proposal for the better regulation ... of Quadrille," written by
Dr. Josiah Hort, Bp. of Kilmore, in 1735/6 (afterwards Abp. of Tuam), and
included by Scott in his edition of Swift (vii. 372-7). [T.S.]]