How did it all happen? That is hard to tell because of all the guests
only Verotchka's Slipper remembered just what had transpired. She was
the only sensible one. She crept away under the couch just in time.
This is how it all happened. First the Wooden Blocks went up to Vanka
to congratulate him. No-No-NO. That isn't how it started. The Blocks
really did go up to Vanka, but the real cause of the trouble was
Katya. Yes, it was all her fault. This pretty little rascal, towards
the very end of the dinner, whispered to Anya:
"Anya, who do you think is the prettiest of all here?"
It was quite a simple question to ask, but Matryona Ivanovna,
overhearing it, grew frightfully offended and asked Katya:
"Do you think my Petrooshka is ugly?"
"Nobody thinks that," answered Katya, trying to defend herself. But it
was too late.
"Of course, his nose is too big," continued Matryona Ivanovna, "but
that is hardly noticeable, if you look at him sideways. I know he has a
bad habit of squealing and squabbling with people but he is really very
kind. And as for brains ..."
She was unable to finish because the Dolls began to argue with so much
heat that they attracted everybody's attention. The first to interfere
was, of course, Petrooshka himself.
"It's true, Matryona Ivanovna," said he, "I am the handsomest here."
Then the men were all offended.
"Just listen to this conceited Petrooshka!" said they. "It's
disgusting!"
Clown was not much of a talker, so he was silently offended. But Dr.
Carl Ivanovitch almost shouted:
"Does that mean that the rest of us are monsters? Gentlemen, I
congratulate you!"
There was great noise and confusion. Gypsy shouted something in his own
language. Bear growled. Wolf howled. Gray Billy Goat bawled. Top
hummed. They all shouted their offense.
"Gentlemen, stop!" pleaded Vanka. "Please pay no attention to
Petrooshka. I am sure he was only jesting."
It was all in vain. Carl Ivanovitch was noisier and more excited than
the rest. He even pounded his fist on the table and shouted:
"Gentlemen, this is a fine treat, I must say! We were invited here only
to be told that we are monsters!"
"Ladies and gentlemen!" shouted Vanka, trying in vain to be heard. "If
monsters are under discussion, there is but one monster here. It is I!
Now are you satisfied?"
Then, let us see what happened next....
Carl Ivanovitch completely lost control and flew at Petrooshka, with a
threatening fist.
"If I were not an educated man, knowing how to behave properly in
decent society, I would say to you, 'Master Petrooshka, you are quite a
fool.'"
Knowing Petrooshka's squabbling disposition, Vanka tried to get between
him and the Doctor, but on his way, his fist caught Petrooshka's long
nose. Petrooshka thought that it was not Vanka, but the doctor who had
struck him. And that's how it all began.
Petrooshka clutched at the doctor. Gypsy, seated at one side, began
without any provocation to pummel Clown. Bear threw himself with a
growl upon Wolf. Top hit Billy Goat with his empty head. In a word,
there was a row. Dolls squealed in their shrill voices and all three
fainted with fright.
"I'm fainting," screamed Matryona Ivanovna, falling off the couch.
"Gentlemen! What does all this mean?" pleaded Vanka. "Gentlemen! Is
this not my birthday? Gentlemen! This is rude!"
[Illustration]
It was a real fight. The confusion was so great that it was impossible
to tell who was beating whom. Vanka tried to separate the fighters, but
it ended in his beating anybody and everybody who came within his arm's
reach. And as he was the strongest, his guests came off pretty badly.
"Help! Help! Heavens' help!" cried Petrooshka, loudest of all, trying
to strike the Doctor.
"They are murdering Petrooshka! Help! Help!"
Slipper was the only one who escaped the fight. She crept under the
couch just in time. She closed her eyes in fear. Rabbit, seeking
safety, hid inside Slipper.
"Where are you going?" grumbled Slipper.
"Keep still! They might hear us and then both of us would get it,"
pleaded little Rabbit, peeping through the tiny hole in Slipper's toe.
"What a rascal that Petrooshka is! He beats everyone and shouts loudest
of all. He's a fine guest, I must say! You know I hardly got away from
Wolf. My! it's horror, just to think of it! Just see Duckling with her
tiny legs up. Poor thing! She must be dead."
"How foolish you are, little Rabbit," said Slipper. "All the dolls have
fainted and so has Duckling."
They fought and fought and fought until Vanka drove away all the guests
except the Dolls.
Matryona Ivanovna, tired of lying in a faint, opened one eye and asked:
"Where am I? Doctor, will you see if I am still alive?"
No one answered her and Matryona Ivanovna opened her other eye. The
room was empty except for Vanka, who stood in the center looking
around, much astonished. Anya and Katya also revived and they, too,
were amazed. Something horrible must have happened.
"You're a fine birthday child, I must say!" simultaneously exclaimed
the Dolls, addressing Vanka, who did not know what to answer.
Someone hit him; he hit someone. Why? Wherefore? He did not know.
"I really do not know how it all happened," said Vanka. "The thing that
hurts most is that I love them all. All without exception."
"We know how it all happened," called Slipper and Rabbit from under the
couch. "We saw it all."
"It is all your fault," said Matryona Ivanovna, accusing little Slipper
and Rabbit. "Of course, it is you who are to blame. You started the
row and then you ran away and hid."
"They're to blame! They're to blame!" screamed Anya and Katya in
chorus.
"Now I see it all," cried Vanka, joyfully. "Get out, you rascals! You
only visit people to start quarrels."
Slipper and Rabbit were barely able to make their escape through the
window.
"I'll teach you a lesson," threatened Matryona Ivanovna, following in
their wake. "There are some nasty people in this world! Even little
Duckling will agree with me."
"Yes, yes," said little Duckling. "I saw them hide under the couch."
Duckling always agreed with everybody.
"Let the guests return," said Katya. "We can still have a jolly time."
The guests were all glad to come back. Some had black eyes; some
limped. Petrooshka's long nose had the worst of it.
"The rascals!" all repeated in chorus, blaming Rabbit and Slipper for
everything. "Who would have thought it of them!"
"Oh, I am so tired! My hands are all sore," complained Vanka. "But let
us forget it and bear no grudge. Let's have music."
Once more, drum beat--rub-a-dub-dub! Trumpets blew--toot-a-toot-too!
And Petrooshka shouted with all his might:
"Hurrah for Vanka!"
[Illustration]
THE STORY OF MASTER SPARROW, MASTER STICKELBACK AND THE JOLLY
CHIMNEY-SWEEP, YASHA
I
Master Sparrow and Master Stickelback were great friends. In summer,
Master Sparrow came daily to the river, calling:
"Hello, brother! How are you?"
"Pretty well. Managing to keep alive," answered Stickelback. "Come to
visit me. The deep pools are fine. The water is quiet. And it's just
full of water grass. I will treat you to frogs' eggs, worms and water
bugs."
"Thank you, brother, I would come with pleasure, only I am afraid of
the water," said the Sparrow. "You better visit me on my roof. I'll
treat you to berries--I have a whole garden full--and we will rummage
for some bread crusts, some oats, a bit of sugar and live mosquitoes.
You like sugar, don't you?"
"What does it look like?" asked Stickelback.
"It is white."
"Like the pebbles in my river?"
"Exactly. But when you take it into your mouth it's sweet. One can't
eat pebbles, you know. Come, let us fly to my roof."
"No, I can't fly. And I suffocate in the open air," said the Fish. "Let
us have a swim together in my river. That's much better. I will show
you all sorts of things."
Master Sparrow tried to get into the water. He jumped in up to his
knees; then fear seized him--fear of drowning. Heretofore, all that the
Sparrow had ever done was to get a drink of clear river water and to
take a bath in the shallowest part on a hot day. Then he would shake
his feathers out and return to his roof.
Nevertheless, the two were great friends. They liked chatting together
about all sorts of things.
"Don't you ever get tired of staying in the water," Sparrow would say,
wondering. "It is so wet. Aren't you afraid of taking cold?"
Master Stickelback in his turn would wonder at Master Sparrow:
"Don't you ever get tired of flying? Isn't it too warm to be out in the
sun? It would just suffocate me. It is always cool where I live. I swim
as I like. When summer comes, my river is crowded with bathers. But who
ever visits your roof?"
"Oh, I have plenty of visitors. I have one great chum, the
Chimney-Sweep, Yasha. He often visits me. He is such a jolly
Chimney-Sweep, always singing. He cleans the chimneys, singing away.
When he rests, he sits on the very edge of the roof, eats his piece of
bread for lunch, while I pick up the crumbs. We are great friends. I
also like to be jolly sometimes."
The Sparrow and the Fish had many troubles in common. Winter was very
hard on both. Poor Master Sparrow almost froze to death. The days were
so bitter cold. His very soul seemed to freeze within him. He would
puff himself up, tuck his legs underneath him and sit on his roof,
waiting for the sunshine. There was only one other warm place for him
and that was the chimney, but even here it was hardly safe.
Once, Master Sparrow almost perished. It was the fault of his best
friend, the Chimney-Sweep. One day, Yasha came to clean the chimney.
His brush, with the weight attached, came down the chimney and almost
smashed Master Sparrow's head. Covered with soot, Master Sparrow
escaped from the chimney. He was even blacker than Yasha.
"I say! What do you mean, Yasha? You almost killed me," scolded Master
Sparrow.
[Illustration]
"How was I to know you were sitting in the chimney?" asked Yasha.
"You must be more careful," said Master Sparrow. "It isn't very nice to
be hit by such a heavy weight. I am sure you wouldn't like it."
In winter, Stickelback's life was not very pleasant. He crawled
somewhere deep, deep into the river and dozed there for days. It was
dark and cold and he had no desire to move. Occasionally he came up to
the ice-hole to chat with his friend.
When Master Sparrow came to the ice-hole for a drink, he would call,
"Hey, Master Stickelback! Are you still alive?"
"I am," Master Stickelback would answer sleepily. "But I want to stay
asleep all the time. It isn't very nice here. Everybody is asleep."
"It isn't much better where I live," said Sparrow. "But we must be
patient. At times the wind is very cruel. There is no sleep then. I
hop along on one leg to keep warm, while people watching me say, 'What
a gay little sparrow!' If only warm days would come! Brother, I believe
you are asleep again."
Summer brought with it its own troubles. Once a hawk chased Master
Sparrow for two miles. Sparrow barely escaped by hiding in the sedge
near the river.
"My! I am glad to get off alive," complained Master Sparrow to Master
Stickelback, scarcely able to catch his breath. "That rascal almost
caught me then."
"He must be something like our pike," said Stickelback, consolingly.
"Not long ago I, too, barely escaped the pike's fangs. That pike was as
quick as lightning. One day, as I was swimming out with some friends, I
mistook him for a log, he lay so still, and he chased me. Will you
tell me why there are pikes in the world? I have often wondered, but I
cannot understand."
"Neither can I," said Master Sparrow. "Do you know, I sometimes think
that a hawk must at one time have been a pike and a pike must have been
a hawk. Anyway, both are rascals."