Behold, my Daughter, how Man’s taste concerning women hath changed!
For lo, it hath come to pass that a maiden of sweet and simple sixteen
is, unto a matron of fair and frivolous forty, as breakfast food unto
caviar and old wine.
Yea, a man no longer yearneth for a babe to cuddle; and a clinging
vine fretteth him, as a shoe that squeaketh or a chair that wobbleth.
Moreover, he desireth _rich_ things. And a widow with many shekels hath
a more solid attraction than a damsel with naught but beauties of the
soul.
Go to! The kiss of a damsel of sixteen is more insipid than pink
ice-cream, but the kiss of a woman of forty hath the flavor of
experience and vera violetta.
Lo, a damsel worshippeth a man as a demi-god and discourseth unto him
of her “ideals”; but a matron _mothereth_ him and cooeth unto him in
_baby talk_. A damsel discusseth the _weather_ with a youth and singeth
“The Rosary” unto him; but a woman of forty discusseth _his talents_
and singeth him lullabies. A maiden babbleth on as the brook, thinking
to be _always_ amusing, but a matron knoweth that after his labors of
the day a man preferreth a down pillow unto fireworks.
A maiden pouteth and chafeth beneath his “moods”, but a matron
ascertained whether they proceed from indigestion or an ingrowing
temperament, and healeth them accordingly with soda mints or flattery.
A maiden seeketh to appear _mysterious_, and romantic, but a matron
playeth always the _platonic friend_. She is _so_ simple.
A maiden goeth roundabout ways to hasten a proposal, but a matron
_seemeth to put it off_. She forbiddeth him to speak of marriage, even
as she forbiddeth a small boy to touch the medicine which she hath
determined he shall swallow. And lo, he yearneth straightway therefor.
Verily, verily, a maiden goeth forth with the sound of bugles and an
airgun, but a matron setteth her trap in unseen places and lieth low.
A maiden _challengeth_ a man with coquettishness, but a matron putteth
him to _sleep_! For no man goeth into matrimony with his eyes open!
Verily, verily, he falleth in love as he falleth out of bed, and
awakeneth with a great shock, knowing not _how it hath happened_.