One, two, three—five men that call themselves my friends, all wishful
to borrow money! Statilius, you will please to make a note of these
five gentlemen, and give orders that on no account are they to pass my
vestibule again. The settlement of society under our Prince has done much
to stamp out the dangerous classes, but we have not yet got rid of the
borrowers. I think it a little hard that after I have neglected my estate
for half my life to expel roguery by the front door that it should creep
in at the back.
Did you inquire, Statilius, why my cook served white sauce with quails
last night? Very well; I have made it a rule to deal with my people in
person: send for him. It is not possible to maintain a household well
regulated, unless the servants come personally into touch with the master.
Plato, you served me last night a dish which, had any of my friends been
present, would have shamed me forever. As it was, my dinner was ruined.
It is incompetence such as yours whose ill effects Rome has struggled
these eight lustrums to efface. You will be sold in the market tomorrow.
Go.
You see now, Statilius, the wisdom of my rule to permit no freedman in
my household: all my servants are my own property. You will buy me the
best cook in Rome in three hours. What, sir? You are a free man, and
I employed you only to work at my pedigree and my library? True: I am
satisfied with you. But understand that if I bid you litter my horses you
will do it, or I sell you up tomorrow. Now, sir, the best cook in Rome
is Iulus Antonius’s Dama: buy him. Antonius is a rich man? Very true,
but I think we need not be afraid of that. We can tempt him, I imagine,
Statilius. At any price whatever: do you understand? And not a penny more
than he will sell at: understand that also. If he is stubborn, hint at my
influence with the Prince; that will be sufficient. Go.
Iulus knows that he is whispered against, and he looks to me to prop
him up. I shall not do so. Again and again I have urged on Octavian the
necessity of putting these malcontents out of the way. His father’s son
cannot but be a danger to a settled State, however soundly disposed
himself. It appears to me that Octavian is losing his aptitude for
politics, and Agrippa exercises the worst possible influence upon him.
This stupid, expensive system of banishment: it should never have had my
voice had I remained in politics.
Thucydides, I have told you once already I am not to be disturbed in
meditation. The poet Horace is in attendance? Horatius, I think you mean;
avoid these vulgarisms, Thucydides. Bid Horatius wait. Indeed, I doubt
not whether Octavian had at any time any real grasp of the principles of
government. I was deceived by the facility with which he lent himself
to my views. He is a man incapable of understanding any system between
militarism and license. Of the finer arts of statecraft I am afraid he
knows very little. How often have I explained to that man how the law of
treason might be developed into an infallible engine of sound government!
Yes: I was wise to leave politics, though Octavian is ungrateful to his
Mentor. Well, I will see Horatius. He, at least, with all his faults, is
a faithful soul. A man I have made.
Good-day, Horatius. I hope you are well and keeping sober. Have you
brought the work I commissioned? Very well; let me see it. There has been
a very great improvement in your manner of writing, Horatius, since I
took you up: the large P’s are very much bolder than they were. But what
is this? This is not the Epistle Dedicatory I ordered. That comes second?
Ah! yes, here it is; you should have given it to me first.