Smaly and Redy are not well received: They are thought to be
made of painted cardboard: How the Despoiler fell into the
water and left a foot behind him: Mistigris sticks a
fish-bone into the back of the Despoiler: Judgment is passed
on the two strangers: They will be banished at nightfall:
The walls of the three gardens are discussed.
The two rulers of this country were the Chief Contractor and the
Despoiler. On arriving at the town where the rulers lived, Redy and
Smaly could hear a hundred bells ringing out crystal chimes. These bells
were made of coloured sugar and were hung in campaniles of barley-sugar,
whose domes were made of gilded crusts.
When the bells left off ringing, a beautiful song arose, and each person
who sang it had a voice as sweet as that of the Short-Legged Man or of
Papylick.
"We must have arrived for the midday prayer of the Wigs," said Smaly and
Redy to themselves in their nuts.
Before very long Papylick and the Short-Legged Man arrived at the house
where the Chief Contractor lived and went into the great kitchen.
"Well," said the Chief Contractor, coming forward to meet them, "what
have you brought me?"
[Illustration: OPENING THE NUTS AND DISPLAYING THE TWO LITTLE PEOPLE]
"A mere nothing," replied Papylick, opening the nuts and displaying the
two little people, who, jumping out, became their normal size once more.
[Illustration: LEADING BY THE HAND THE CHOCOLATE GRUB]
"They are two suet-eaters," said the Short-Legged Man apologetically, as
he made Smaly and Redy sit down upon two charming seats made of painted
wax.
There were more than a hundred of these seats round the enormous
kitchen, each occupied by some noted Wig.
Smaly and Redy soon recognized the Crow, and the next moment they saw
the Confectioner come in, apparently having quite got over his trouble
and leading by the hand the Chocolate Grub who was the doorkeeper.
The Chief Contractor and the Despoiler gazed attentively at Smaly and
his wife; but as at this moment dinner was brought in, the two little
humans were forgotten in the graver interest of the banquet. The eating
in this country was a serious affair attended with many rites.
* * * * *
The banquet began. This solemn feast took place every day. As soon as
the guests had taken their seats, each picked up a little slate, which
hung by the side of his chair, a slate made of chocolate framed in
well-cooked pastry, and each began to write his menu upon his slate. No
matter what he wrote, whether it were eggs or roast larks, or whatever
it were, the thing at once appeared: the birds with their legs encased
in cutlet frills, and the eggs running along on two little feet, and
carrying a spoon and salt-cellar in either hand.
[Illustration: THE BIRDS WITH THEIR LEGS ENCASED IN CUTLET FRILLS]
Redy and Smaly could not help thinking that all this was rather
alarming; they were not used to seeing slices of toast arrive running
like big spiders.
Careering busily about the kitchen were little pigs made of marzipan.
They were gentle and pretty pigs, who smelt deliciously of aromatic
herbs, and each had a knife and fork stuck in his back.
When each guest had cut as much marzipan as he wanted he replaced the
knife and fork, and the little pig at once ran merrily on to the next
guest without turning so much as one of its marzipan hairs.
As to the tarts, they arrived flying like sparrows or miniature
aeroplanes.
* * * * *
Redy also was presented with a slate, and she copied upon it the signs
which she saw the Chief Contractor make upon his. By this means she
partook of plum tart, oranges, and marzipan, all of which she shared
with Smaly, who was not so quick as she was at copying the writing of
the next-door neighbour.
[Illustration: THE EGGS RUNNING ALONG]
Certainly it was a most splendid feast; and as to the service, as one
sees, it was conducted in a very novel fashion. Such was a banquet in
this country, though on more ordinary occasions the Wigs had to go to
their provisions instead of the provisions coming to them.
* * * * *
The feast over, the Wigs dipped their hands in finger-bowls, which
consisted of the halves of melons scooped out and filled with
rose-water. The Wigs all appeared very happy, their cheeks were flushed,
their little amethyst-coloured eyes shone with satisfaction, the air was
filled with a delicious scent of fruit.
[Illustration: THEY WERE GENTLE AND PRETTY PIGS]
"It seems to me there is an extraordinary smell of suet here," said the
Chief Contractor, suddenly darting an unpleasant look at Smaly and his
wife.
"For my part," said the Despoiler, whose whole person from his nose to
his feet, which were flatter than pancakes, expressed extreme
suspicion--"for my part, what I smell is painted and varnished
cardboard." And he, too, fixed Smaly and Redy with his eyes.
[Illustration: A MOST SPLENDID FEAST]
All the Wigs began to laugh, their large, amiable frogs' mouths
expanded, and they crossed their fingers under their chins, which is in
this country a great sign of mirth. They laughed because they all knew
quite well that the Despoiler himself was only made of cardboard. He was
certainly very well covered with jams and sweetmeats; but he was
cardboard underneath for all that.
[Illustration: THE DESPOILER]
There was a story that one day the Despoiler had found himself beside a
pool which lay between his house and the great kitchen of the Chief
Contractor. The Despoiler had wanted to capture a flying-fish made of
red marzipan, which was feeding upon a laurel-tree beside the pool. He
leaned forward too far towards the tree and fell into the water, which
was none the less wet for being scented with orange flowers. The birds
which lived at the bottom of the pool brought him up to the surface once
more. He was saved; but a terrible thing had happened to him. Not one
spot of jam remained upon his cardboard.
[Illustration: WHICH IS IN THIS COUNTRY A GREAT SIGN OF MIRTH]
He fled hastily.
[Illustration: HE FLED HASTILY]
He had left one of his feet behind him in the water, and the Crow,
taking off his spectacles, fished it up. Two kindly Wigs ran after the
Despoiler with his cardboard foot.
The Despoiler, although he was very clever, was also very vain, and
pretended that it was not his foot at all; but only the sole of one of
his shoes; but all the Wigs knew perfectly well that it was really his
foot.
* * * * *
While the Wigs were still laughing at the expense of the Despoiler,
Smaly saw Mistigris, a Wig who moved with an extremely cat-like tread,
strike the Despoiler from behind with a long fish-bone, and transfix his
insensible cardboard back.
The Chief Contractor, who saw what had happened, rattled the castanets
which he wore on his left knee, and a young Stork dressed in the uniform
of a fireman ran up behind the Despoiler, and by the aid of long pincers
withdrew the fish-bone. This was evidently quite a usual occurrence.
The Chief Contractor picked up one of the masks that hung round his
neck, a mask which was called "Dignity," and placed it over his face.
When he had worn this for a minute he let it swing like a monocle, and
put in its place a mask called "Severity."
"Let every one take his place," he cried in a stern voice.
The Wigs gathered round in a circle, all looking towards the door.
[Illustration: MISTIGRIS]
"You're making a mistake, old man," whispered the Despoiler familiarly.
"The arrangement was that we were going to see a review of your
soldiers."
"We are going to hold a council instead," shouted the Chief Contractor,
and drops of perspiration, big and pink as strawberries, rolled down his
mask.
Suddenly he snatched it off and replaced it with a mask which signified
"Anger."
The assembly trembled. There was a sound as of shuddering macaroni or of
dominoes rattling with fear.
"Reckybecky, you are out of line!" cried the Chief Contractor from
beneath his mask of saffron and flame colour. "Papylick and Mistigris,
pay attention! Is it possible that already the intrusion here of two
rascals made of suet is going to corrupt you all and reduce you to
anarchy?"
Mistigris and Papylick came running up with a cord, and, each taking an
end, they held it in front of the row of Wigs to keep them straight.
Those Wigs whose feet stuck out too far drew them back, and those whose
feet did not come out far enough advanced them until every one's toes
touched the cord and made a straight line.
"You can roll the cord up," commanded the master; then he turned to
Smaly. "Tell the truth," he demanded, "are you made of suet?"
* * * * *
At this moment Papylick and the Young Stork gave a cry of horror. They
had discovered that Smaly and Redy had licked the painted landscapes off
the insides of the nuts in which they had been transported.
[Illustration: THE YOUNG STORK]
Every one uttered cries of indignation, and pressed forward so that
their feet had to be brought to order again with the help of the cord.
[Illustration: EVERY ONE UTTERED CRIES OF INDIGNATION]
"The law is clear. These people made of cardboard and suet must be
banished at once," said the Despoiler, who did not wear a mask, but
could roll his eyes and open his mouth as much as he liked.
"The sun is at its height. It's hot enough to bake tarts," said the
Confectioner. "If these two people go out now the sun will melt them,
and our beautiful lawns will be covered with fat."
"Horror!" cried several of the Wigs.
"Then they must stay here until the sun has set," decided the Chief
Contractor, and putting on a mask called "The Listener" he continued:
[Illustration: "YOU CAN ROLL THE CORD"]
"Now tell me what they want, these disturbing people whom you have
brought here. Tell me everything that you know, O Short-Legged Man."
But Smaly and Redy spoke together, and they said:
"We wish to have three girls.
Fine, sweet, pink and good.
They shall have more pudding than they like,
And a green, green----"
Here Redy stopped and said:
"... each a green garden."
The Chief Contractor replied, "Won't do."
The Crow added, "Because there aren't any."
"There are the three daughters of the Prisoner," said the Chief
Contractor; "but they can't go out of the country."
"Look here," said the Mother of the Crow, who had just been brought in
seated in her oyster-shell, "why shouldn't this man and his wife live
just behind the wall of the country, then they will be able to look at
the Prisoner's daughters."
"That won't do," said the Chief Contractor, "the girls mustn't speak to
each other. They don't know, none of them knows, that their father was
beheaded, and if they spoke to each other about it they would all know."
"Well, well," said the Mother of the Crow, preparing to be very wise,
"they can surround each garden by a wall and keep the girls separate."
So it was decided that the little man and his wife were to be banished
after sunset; but they could live beyond the wall, and the girls should
each have a green garden surrounded by a wall of its own.
[Illustration: THE CHIEF CONTRACTOR REPLIED]
These walls were to be quite low to suit the stature of the young girls,
and each year the walls were to be raised as the girls grew taller.
Thus the girls would not be able to see each other or be able to confide
to each other indiscretions on a thousand and one subjects of which they
knew nothing.
[Illustration: CHILDREN WERE BUILT OF MUCH FEWER SLICES OF CAKE THAN THE
GROWN-UPS]
Here the Chief Contractor again made a very strong objection.
"It's important," he said, "that every year on their birthdays we should
insert a slice of cake in these little girls so that they should grow
tall enough to suit their age."
In the somewhat embarrassed silence which followed, Smaly discovered why
the Wigs had such short legs and such long bodies.
"Of course, that is it," he said to himself; "each year on their
birthdays somebody adds another tart or slice of cake to them, and they
grow taller."
[Illustration: THESE CREATURES WILL EAT THE TOP OFF THE WALLS]
He glanced out of the window and saw that this was indeed so, that the
children were built of much fewer slices of cake than the grown-ups.
* * * * *
The Chief Contractor now made a second objection.
"But what shall we do," he said, "when the garden wall of the eldest
girl grows to be five feet high, for you mustn't forget that that is the
height at which the fishes and lizards fly, so the wall will never be
able to be higher than five feet, for every night these creatures will
eat the top off the walls."
It was again the Mother of the Crow who saved the situation. The dark
hole in which she wore her eye when her son was not carrying it round
his neck seemed full of intelligence. She placed her finger upon her
brow without moving her arm (for the simple reason that she did not
possess one), and said:
"When we can no longer make the walls higher, then we will sink the
gardens as much as is needful."
All the same the Wigs could not accept this as a solution, for it seemed
to them that men grew upwards and not towards the ground, that is to
say, from the head and not from the feet.
[Illustration: ANGER]
The Chief Contractor gave the matter due thought.
[Illustration: IT SEEMED TO THEM THAT MEN GREW UPWARDS AND NOT TOWARDS
THE GROUND]
"We will place the annual slice of cake exactly in the middle of the
girls," he announced, "and thus we will only have to sink the level of
the gardens a little, and raise the top of the walls a little."
But since nobody seemed quite ready to accept this as a solution, the
Chief Contractor again placed upon his face the mask called "Anger," and
every one held their tongues from perplexity.
[Illustration: SOME VERY ELEGANT MICE]
Happily at this moment the most charming music was heard upon the air.
One could detect the scent of this music with one's nose, and taste it
with one's tongue. One could see it floating out from various little
boxes that some very elegant mice were opening and shutting with much
delicacy and care.
"It's the review of the troops beginning," exclaimed the Young Stork in
a loud voice as he tweaked the hundredth fish-bone out of the insensible
back of the Despoiler.