The following letter, dated March 12th, has been received from Sir
ARTHUR STANLEY:--
"The completion of the Fund which Mr. Punch has raised in
connection with the 'Our Day' appeal gives me the opportunity
of again expressing my grateful appreciation of this splendid
effort.
"The total remittances we have received from you amount to
£11,040 5s. 5d., and the long list of subscribers shows
how loyally and generously the readers of _Punch_ have rallied
to your appeal.
"On behalf of the Joint War Committee of the British Red Cross
Society and the Order of St. John, I should like to thank you
and your readers most cordially for the welcome assistance you
have provided for the relief of the sick and wounded."
* * * * *
"To-day in the garden:--
"Refine the onion-bed thoroughly."--_Daily Mail_.
Have you tried eau-de-Cologne?
* * * * *
_NOUVELLES DE PARIS_.
_Paris, March 1919._
DEAREST POPPY,--I have a piece of news to send you from here that will
give you a veritable _frisson d'angoisse_. No, it doesn't concern the
Peace Conference; it's something far worse than that. _Figurez-vous_,
the new style of _coiffure_ is severe to the point of being absolutely
terrifying--that is to the woman who has been shivering on the brink
of thirty for any length of time.
Foreheads are coming in again--_que c'est embêtant_! I thought they'd
been abolished long ago. I wish I could get hold of the _méchant_ (for
I know it's a man) who is introducing them now. I had my hair dressed
_chez_ Manet to-day in the new style, and when I saw myself afterwards
I sat down and wept like the women of Babylon.
_Quel horreur!_ My locks were strained, brushed, tightened back, and
I was left high and dry with my exposed brow revealing four furrows to
an unsympathetic world. _C'est navrant_. We're not to be allowed even
the _soupçon_ of a wave or the lightest _bouffée_, while side-curls
are quite _démodés_.
I think the situation is really tragic. So few women can afford to
have a forehead. The result will be that lots of our _débutantes_ of
some seasons ago will be "_coiffées à Ste. Catherine_" in more senses
than one.
The "jewellery" one wears now is made of wood; we have carved wooden
beads, wooden bracelets, even wooden rings. "Therefore it will be
cheap!" you exclaim. _Vous vous trompez, mon amie._ I read a story
the other day of an American who said that if you want an egg here
for breakfast it is cheaper to buy the hen and hope she'll lay next
morning, and in any case you've got the hen. _Eh bien_, should you
desire a set of wooden jewellery you might save money if you bought a
forest.
Paris has done more than extend _le bon accueil_ to the Peace
delegates; she is giving their names to the latest thing in
_vêtements_. Thus we have the Lloyd George _cravate_, the Wilson
_gilet_ and the "Bonarlaw" _chapeau melon_. It's surprising how
far-reaching are the effects of a Peace Conference.
A number of _nous autres Anglais_ over here started a perfectly
_thrilling_ idea. It was really in the way of being an adventure. We
have been exploring the quaint little _cafés_ of Paris, with results
_tout à fait étonnants_. We were served with provokingly delicious
_plats_, at a price absurdly moderate compared with what is extorted
from us in the hotels. Of course we were all enchanted. We became
_habitués_ of _cafés_ and ceased to take any meals at our hotels
beyond the matutinal _café complet_.
And then, quite suddenly, a horrid newspaper article appeared which
conveyed suggestions _extrêmement désagréables._ It insinuated, _ma
chère_, that "things are not what they seem"--at any rate things in
the bill of fare at the moderately-priced eating-house.
It went on to speak of the many uses that domestic animals are put to
after their labours on earth are ended. If it was horse that figured
in the _boeuf bourguignon_ served up to me, or the _potée de boeuf aux
choux_ (of which I will admit I _raffole_) I have no quarrel with it.
It's the "_lapin_" I have had occasionally that's giving me the most
qualms. I can't look at a cat now without a shudder.
As for Bertie, he says whenever he thinks of the _tripes à la mode
de Caen_ he so often favoured, he's very glad that he has even less
imagination than his friends credit him with.
Of course the article may have been inspired by the keepers of hotels
who were losing our custom. I think it's more than likely. But we've
decided for the present to give the hotels the benefit of the doubt.
_Toujours_,
Your well-devoted ANNE.
* * * * *