vulgar woman would place her so-called friends at a disadvantage by
entertaining them beyond their power of return.
It is pathetic to watch the social efforts--"climbing"--of people with
only money "Sans" brains and originality.
Youth and Maturity.
The two attractive periods in a woman's life are girlhood and maturity.
If girlhood is not sufficiently attractive a girl may go into beauty
training for maturity.
Many women who persevere in right thinking and right actions have three
stages of attractiveness, youth, maturity, and old age.
A face that reflects nothing is seldom beautiful.
To be beautiful one must think more, love more, in the right way, and
give more in the right way.
A girl should not try to get old and look old, for age comes to her soon
enough. Girlhood comes but once in a lifetime. One must keep young by
being young and "thinking young." One must never let tiredness leave its
mark either in the face or poise. Tiredness has never attracted and when
people say that one looks tired, it is time to smile and deny it, for
the "Spot" is beginning to take form. The body should never be permitted
to settle. In Cuba, the women have enormous hips because they sit so
much and are inactive.
Each muscular movement should reflect health and youth until one feels
hardy and young. One should breathe all the fresh air that she can
consume. Breathing is a vital force which sends blood to fill out
wrinkles and eradicate blemishes and spots.
The fair, fat, and forty age is no longer dreaded. Like Lillian Russell,
women are learning to keep the face youthful by keeping the illusion of
youth and the belief that she is youthful. If we feel young we look
young.
Self Control.
"Will Power is the rudder of the ship of life."
A woman's life is about what she makes it. She is her own Fate. The law
that governs one, governs all humanity, because the laws of thought are
the laws of the universe. The mind and body are co-workers. "As a man
thinks, so is he." Great men are those who see to it that the mental
force is stronger than the material, and who "Will" that thought shall
rule their world.
Every thought stimulates certain brain cells, and exercises some nerve,
tissue or muscle. Man's superiority to animal is due to this mental
action.
Actions speak louder than words. They are published thoughts. Every
movement of every portion of the body has significance. Picking up a
glass, a cup, or tools and other habits reflect the mind and its
superiority to the physical. There is no surer way to judge people.
Every face tells a tale and we read character from the physical
form--the head, the backbone, the eye, the mouth, the chin, or hand. The
uplifted eye, the corners of the mouth, the manner in which one eats or
stands, in fact every movement has a special meaning, which may be
easily read.
The body is like a camera, it tells the truth; it is the outward sign of
inward grace, or vice versa.
Some one has said "Women's characters are writ large on their faces and
God writes a perfectly plain hand." Because women are more emotional
than men and because they often indulge themselves in emotions, the
signs are frequently very evident. If we study these signs when we meet
others we may "size them up," and almost know what is passing through
their minds. Because of sexual magnetism men read women more easily than
they read men.
Mental habits soon become reflective or automatic. In order to read
others we must study ourselves, discover our habits and tendencies and
trace them to their source for correction.
The time has arrived for new thoughts, new studies, and new habits.
Colored women must be led along the new lines of thinking. Although many
have seemed stupid about some of the abstract studies, they have native
powers that have too long lain dormant.
Many are permitting their forces to go to waste instead of controlling
them. They must discipline themselves to gain self control over such
habits as over-eating, coarseness, inertia, anger, and other beauty
destroyers.
Any excessive emotion debilitates the nervous system and thus affects
good looks.
Proper poise prolongs life because pressure on certain organs is evenly
distributed and no strain is placed on any particular muscles to cause
abscesses or tumors, etc. Improved circulation of the blood results, and
good circulation spells health. One can think better when poise is
correct for the same reason.
The conversation of people gives a pretty correct estimate of character.
Complaints from people who are sorry for themselves is one of the
tell-tale evidences of a weak character.
There is a present day need of knowledge concerning a certain contagion
of emotions. Strong feeling sometimes vibrates that which is hostile and
selfish. One fretful, scolding woman can upset a neighborhood, to say
nothing of a household.
One's thoughts should be of love and peace, instead of worry and fear,
lest she may harm others. A woman should be unafraid to conquer life's
problems. She should have faith in herself or she will be a dreamer
instead of a doer. She must be positive instead of negative, but be
positive in the right way which includes the thought and help for
others.
Voices reflect the mind and soul, so the colored woman should control
the speaking voice.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox has said,
"Some voices affect us like music,
Some voices arouse to action and ambition.
Some voices fill you with despondency.
Some voices irritate like a buzz-saw.
Some voices snap like turtles, and some hiss like serpents."
Control of the speaking voice is one of the most admired evidences of
self control.
The power of the mind over the body is said to be greater than any germ.
Compelling the mind to perform some one useful disagreeable act each day
is a splendid habit trainer. The influences that we exert over others
will depend to a great extent upon the control over our own habits as
well as the resistance to influence that others might exert over us.
One must conquer habits of laziness, untidiness, extravagance, voice,
gestures, clothing, to gain power to concentrate Thought.
Her Relationship With Men.
Many girls think that they understand men, but they flatter themselves.
Men do not always understand themselves, and often do things because
they have been led to "the doing," by misunderstanding the girl.
A man likes to measure up to the opinion of sympathy, strength,
protection, or wickedness, that he imagines a girl has of him. He often
says and does things to please the girl more than to please himself.
Girls often throw out allurements and temptations especially in the way
of immodest dress and seemingly innocent actions which have been the
downfall of men as well as of themselves. While men have known that the
temptations were deliberately planned, they have not had sufficient will
power to resist. It is an unpardonable crime for a young girl to take
such an advantage for frequently she ruins the career of a man. Such a
girl has two souls to answer for when her own downfall is a sufficient
burden to carry.
Some girls complain of insults from men. There are so many good reasons
which could be given for this, but girls would indignantly deny that one
reason is that they bring this upon themselves.
They discuss slippery subjects and personal experiences, and "heart
longings" which call forth the ever present manly (masculine) sympathy.
This often leads to actions afterwards regretted.
Men are good readers of the public bulletin--a girl's face. They see the
mark of intoxicants, impure thoughts and other weaknesses as if they
were spelled out on the features, and as they are keenly sensitive to
projected vibrations, they act accordingly.
Sometimes dusk, or night's darkness is to blame for much mischief. Moral
resistance seems to be at low ebb at this time, and an evidence of
timidity or other feminine weakness may be misunderstood--read
incorrectly as a feminine subterfuge seeking physical contact.
If one will always expect good from men--the men will generally rise to
it. Try to believe that every man is chivalrous, but do not put his
chivalry to too severe a test.
Curiosity and a too venturesome spirit may lead to mischief and trouble
too great to be remedied. One must not think or project impure thoughts,
nor must she expect insults and familiarities. Men generally respond to
the (influencing) thought. They feel the thoughts and obey them.
Girls must remember that most men talk. Some will tell on girls if it is
the last act of their lives, although they may not mean to tell. A newly
married man will tell his wife, or another will tell his affinity.
Another may drink too much and grow confidential. Some even talk in
their sleep. One may not think that she will escape; her indiscretions
will follow her to her lifelong regret.
She should not try to be a woman too early in life, and should not marry
too early. She should study her physique and her constitution. She
should not permit desire and curiosity to control her good sense. Long
illness, suffering, operations, and even early death may result from
premature responsibility. If necessary, she should consult a physician
and look the future squarely in the face.
Girls do not now mature as early as their mothers and grandmothers did,
and they have not the same power of endurance and resistance, because
times, conditions, and the mode of living have changed.
Long engagements should not be encouraged. If a man wants a girl he will
wait patiently without any coddling or coaxing. Long engagements are
enervating. Engaged couples feel that they are licensed by public
opinion and they tax their powers in a way that married people would not
dare to do. Too much liberty in long engagements is so often a serious
menace to health and happiness in after marriage relationship. It takes
away the charm and bloom of married life because the man learns to know
his fiancee too well.
The Religion of the Colored Girl Beautiful.
God is the perfection in all that is good. God is the best in us. God is
the perfection of all that is beautiful, orderly and harmonious--the 100
per cent of everything in the world.
The religion of the colored girl beautiful should teach her that
everything is spiritual--sacred--because everything comes from God.
It is not sufficient to say, "I am a Christian (I am spiritual--of the
Spirit)" unless one expresses this in countless ways each day. Not only
in kind, helpful actions and gentle speech, but in the work-a-day life.
The colored girl beautiful expresses her Christianity--her
spirituality--the best, or 100 per cent in her, when she puts Christ
into every act of her every day life. No act should be too insignificant
for this expression.
The parables of Jesus teach us that He put His Spirit into the lowest
act, as for instance in the parable of the tent-maker.
If the colored girl beautiful is truly of His Spirit she will
spiritualize, light up her every day environment with the "Light" that
is in her as a beacon to others as well as to show her appreciation of a
priceless possession.
Each day she has innumerable opportunities to express the Christ in
her--her spirituality--in the neatness of her apparel, and in the
tidiness of her home and yard. She may take her religion--her
Christ--into the kitchen and express Him and the 100 per cent
spirituality in her cooking, sweeping, and in her dish washing.
Doing things well expresses the proportion of the Christ--the
perfection--the 100 per cent in us. The more Christ one claims, the
better should one express Christ in his daily labor as every-day
evidence.
A low daily percentage is a poor record for one who claims spirituality
on Sunday.
No untidy church, home, or school expresses Christ--for Christ
represents perfection in cleanliness and order. "Cleanliness is next to
Godliness" we are told. Cleanliness shows the spiritual, the God, but
dirt in any form is an expression of the opposite. Dirt under a bed and
a prayer beside it are not compatible, to say the least, unless the
"pray-er" is unable to sweep.
The Christ principles properly interpreted and applied would
spiritualize a broom and duster and all the utensils of a home or the
tools of a trade.
Order is an expression of the God-part which makes us more orderly in
the habits of life if we make pretensions as Christians.
God is not only all that is perfect in cleanliness, order and harmony,
but He is also all that is perfect in color and sound. God is in the
body and all its parts, the hair, teeth--all.
As harmony and color are expressions of Spirituality so good taste in
dressing expresses the God in us. By observing and studying Nature one
learns God's taste in color and what is harmonious.
We should dress to suit the color of the face and the physical
attributes that have been given to us. God has appropriately garbed each
object in Nature. Colored people should study themselves and dress
accordingly. The bright, gay colors are not suitable to all. Many
violate the laws of harmony of color, and unconsciously expose the
ugliest in their appearance by wearing gaudy, unbecoming, inappropriate
clothes.
As the harmony of sound comes from God, so an eloquent voice expresses
God. Christians should make their voices more elegant and eloquent. A
loud, coarse voice expresses the opposite of God. Coarseness in thought
and speech is unlike Christ and serves to reveal opposite attributes to
those He represents. Grunting is not spiritual. No one could imagine a
grunt from Christ.
A graceful motion or gesture also reflects the God in us. One would
never imagine any rough, uncouth gesture from Christ, who is the
"pattern of patterns." Grimaces are not spiritual besides they leave
lines in the face.
A respect for the rights of others expresses the God in us, as do
obedience and kindness. We are told in positive language by God to
respect our elders and superiors.
Race pride expresses the God in us. The Israelites were the chosen
people because of blood ties. They were proud of their blood. Blood is
thicker than water. The real Christian should be proud of his people; he
should believe in them and uplift them as our Great Example did the
lowly.
The reverence which expresses God will cause one to respect His house or
any portion of it. A Christian would not handle a Bible carelessly and
would dust it as a privilege, because it is the message from God. A
Christian would not tear or disfigure any sacred book or selection of
music, while to sit upon the sacred rail of the altar or pulpit would be
an unpardonable act of sacrilege.
The proper care of any article belonging to the Sacred Service is an
expression of Spirituality because it recognizes the article as a medium
of spirituality, something which should be reverenced.
The singing of religious songs in any but a spiritual frame of mind
would be sacrilege just as the taking of the Lord's name in ordinary
conversation or in exclamation is sacrilege.
The same religion or Spirituality which makes one shout, pray and sing
should prompt a girl not to wear a pale pink or blue satin dress or
other inappropriate fancy decollete dress to worship in God's House. She
cannot worship God and mammon at the same time and she should not be the
means of distracting anyone from spiritual thoughts through envy or
disgust.
The Christ in a person will prevent her from speech and action which
would hurt the chances or success of another person. God has warned us
that the violation of this rule will surely return evil to the violator.
His law has many references to this particular self punishment.
It can not be denied that Divinity has specially endowed the Negro
spiritually, but he does not consistently express it in all the forms
that he might express it, especially in the great Race cause. He is full
of heart, and will give his money, his food, his life, for God--but he
does not yet realize that the same love for God that he puts into his
gifts should be expressed and applied in his daily walks in life as
Christ has expressly commanded.
We are taught that there are four kinds of Emotional Expression: The
Egotistic which is self and in the interest of self as in joy, rapture
and grief; the Aesthetic which has its expression in Nature and Art; the
Ethical which has its expression in the moral law; the Religious which
expression is in the faith of the Supreme Being.
As yet the Negro has only fully expressed himself in but two: The
Egotistic, or the self interest, and the Religious, or the faith in the
Supreme Being.
The Negro undoubtedly brought about his own freedom through his own
spirituality, and faith, and the concentrated, united thought of a whole
people upon one subject--freedom. His remarkable progress since
emancipation has been due to the same faith.
The Negro should be, and could easily be the spiritual teacher--or
example--of the world. He must not only prove his spirituality but he
must diffuse it, that others may realize its power even if they may not
receive its benefit.
Christ, the Supreme Example of spirituality was quiet. Other races hold
that ideal, of spirituality. When they see and hear a Negro shout, weep
and pray and then find that same person uncouth and dirty, they cannot
reconcile the two conditions, and so doubt the spiritual element which
they call Emotionalism. (They do not remember that the Spirit may be
strong and the flesh weak.)
These critics cannot believe that an untidy, ignorant man with dirty
teeth stained with tobacco juice can give spiritual advice, and one must
admit that it does look incompatible.
The race needs more quality in Emotion and less quantity.
Once convince the rankest Negro hater that the Negro undoubtedly has
spirituality, which is surely advancing him and the race, and a certain
respect will follow.
Each Negro must consider himself a spiritual missionary whose
appearance, speech, actions and surroundings will reflect the storehouse
of the great Light within.
The colored ministers who preach Emotionalism, or what they term the
expression of spirituality should see to it that their flocks
spiritualize their daily lives causing cleaner churches, schools, homes,
yards, wearing apparel and Christian thoroughness in each daily act,
thus showing 100 per cent spirituality.
The colored ministers who preach Non-Emotionalism should prove that the
power of spiritual expression is being directed along channels which are
helping their flocks and the race in each daily act, not only in race
progress but in convincing doubting Thomases who are blind to the good
traits in the race.
The so-called Spiritual Power which would cause a woman to run down an
aisle and mash the hats of others, or to throw hand bags and give
similar evidences of strength and emotion could be turned into safer and
more helpful channels--as far as her race is concerned. A woman
possessed of this power and energy could be a great leader in great
deeds if she were taught how to do this. A shouter who can not help the
race in the battle against prejudice in her special locality, by
expressing her spirituality in each daily word and act as well as
apparel, and surroundings, seems a poor example of spiritual expression.
The religion that does not help toward the advancement of this
persecuted race, and does not win the admiration and respect of other
races, is not the religion for the colored girl beautiful, of today.
As a rule colored people expect entirely too much help from God. We must
help ourselves more. Each Negro carries a three-fold burden; first, his
own personal burden; second, the burden of his posterity; and third, the
burden of the race. These follow each other and are dependent upon each
other.
God has given him physical strength, a strong backbone and strong
shoulders to carry the heavy yoke of the three-fold burden, as well as a
wealth of spirituality to cheer him and keep his heart light, along the
way of life.
The religion of the Negro should prompt less study of the desires of the
personal Ego, and should teach other nations to respect his race, or,
his religion is not spiritualizing as it could and should spiritualize.
The religion of the colored girl must be spiritual in every sense, that
it may influence her every thought and act, and make her a true medium
for race progress.
The School of the Colored Girl Beautiful.
"Education is the process of developing all man's powers, physical,
intellectual, moral, aesthetic and religious for the proper discharge of
the duties of citizenship."
The school that the colored girl beautiful should attend will have
trees, grass, flowers, shrubs and a garden (even though a small one)
that the girl may keep in close touch with the first teacher--Mother
Nature.
The care of the school campus as well as the windows, fences, and
surroundings, will reflect the careful spirit of the school.
The colored girl beautiful will select the school which fights flies,
dirt, filth around back doors; the school which aims for sanitation
before putting in electric lights; in fact, a school which has health
and sanitation for its hobby.
She will attend a school that buys books and takes care of them and
which compels the students to read that they may grow into the reading
habit, to pass it along to posterity.
The progress of the race will depend not upon the "book learning" taught
in schools, but upon the right habits formed and the amount of self
culture that the school inspires.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught to keep her eyes open and her
mouth shut that she may never betray how little she has really learned
in her preparation for the real school--the school of Life.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught her duty and relationship to
the race, that she may be a living example of what right education and
right training will do. She will study human needs and about the
history and progress of her people that she may take her place in the
affairs of her race if called upon, and then bequeath her knowledge and
good qualities to succeeding generations. She will be taught lessons of
self-control and modesty; to respect her womanhood and to conduct
herself that she may command respect from all men and boys including
those of her family.
She will be taught enough of the world to step into its arena knowing
the evils to shun. She will be taught to hold out a helping hand to
weaker ones who may succumb to evil.
She will aim to live in pleasant relationship in the school that she may
acquire the habit of living in peace in social circles and neighborhoods
in the scheme of after life.
She will be taught that politeness is a necessary virtue; that every
form of impoliteness is an evidence of mental as well as moral weakness
and that an ill bred colored girl is a curse to the race. She will be
taught the value of silence and that of speech, and will aim to train
herself along both lines for silence is often more effective than
speech.
She will learn that the aim of education is the aim of religion, that
is, to lift one above the animal. She will endeavor to lift herself to
the highest plane of true womanhood that she may pull others higher.
Colored schools are supposed to correct the tendencies of children who
have lived under careless, untidy conditions, and to give them ideals of
cleanliness and order.
She will do her part of the school work cheerfully and thoroughly, that
she may know how work should be done, and how to train others--her
children, perhaps, if so favored.
The colored girl beautiful will be taught the value and use of money,
and the relative value of character, education, and other things, which
money cannot buy. She will be taught the care and cleanliness of the
body, simplicity of wearing apparel and appropriate becoming
inconspicuous costumes for church, school, street and home.
She will be taught that fine clothes can not cover up bad manners, nor
take the place of good character; that it is foolish to buy what one can
not afford; that the expenditure for clothes especially should be gauged
by one's salary and should be appropriate for her particular plane of
life.
The laws of proportion in the scheme of life must be the hobby of the
school for the colored girl beautiful.