THE YOUNG EDITOR.
In 1845, soon after completing his twenty-third year, he received a
call from a stranger, who wished to establish a new weekly paper in
Boston, and who had heard Walter Aimwell and his brother mentioned as
persons suitable to assist in the enterprise. Walter Aimwell was at once
favorably impressed by the plans proposed by Mr. W.; but it was not until
after repeated discussions, that the copartnership contract was signed
and the business fairly commenced. In the forenoon of December 9th, 1845,
he got the ‘Reflector’ ready for the press, for the last time; and at
noon, he left Mr. Damrell’s employ, after having worked for him nearly
nine years. One who was an apprentice in the same office, and who is
now an editor, bears testimony that he was a good printer, remarkable
for his “clean proofs and handsome jobs, and a great favorite with all
the office-hands.” From the beginning of conversation upon the subject
until the complete establishment of the paper, and, indeed, until it
was finally sold, the principal portion of the labor in the editorial
department, and of the general oversight of all departments, seems to
have fallen upon Walter Aimwell. The first numbers of the new candidate
for public favor were published about the beginning of the year 1846.
To show how well he maintains the regular habits with which he commenced
his private journal, I copy the summary for 1845:—
“During the past year I have attended one hundred and thirty-six
religious meetings, one temperance meeting, and one wedding. I have spent
fifty-six evenings in writing, fifty-three in reading, forty in the
study and practice of music, fifty in the study of French, eighteen in
working or attending to business, and ten in company. I have also spent
twenty-two mornings in the study of phonography, and thirty-six in the
study of French. I have visited Charlestown fifty-six times, and spent
one week in travelling, having visited Hallowell, Augusta, Waterville,
Portland, Portsmouth, Newburyport, and Salem. I have been blessed with
good health throughout the year, and have succeeded in getting into
business with a good prospect ahead.”
In his records for the year 1846 it is very common to meet with entries
signifying that he worked in the office until nine or ten o’clock in the
evening, and at home until eleven, twelve, and one o’clock.
In the Bible there are several intimations that the descendants of
sincerely pious persons inherit a peculiar blessing. I have already
alluded to the character of his deceased father. Here I copy a passage in
reference to another relative, now no longer an inhabitant of earth:—
“At two o’clock this afternoon, grandmother died. She has been very low
ever since last summer, and her mind has wandered most of the time, with
the exception of one day last week, when reason returned, and she spoke
of her sickness, prayed earnestly for her children, and expressed a
desire to depart and be with her Saviour.”
After some changes in the proprietorship of the new paper, made during
the first six months of its existence, the following is found in the
record for July 1st: “To-day I became sole editor of the ‘Saturday
Rambler.’ I have edited the paper ever since its commencement, with the
exception of a part of the first three numbers; but Mr. W. now gives it
entirely up to me; and, as we are soon to have a clerk, I shall have more
leisure to devote to it. This is quite an era in my life; for, during
several years past, I have been looking forward to just such a situation
as the one I am now to fill.”
In November, a new organ, that had been built for him at East Medway,
was set up in his mother’s residence in Charlestown; and, from that time
until the day of his death, it afforded him the means of a favorite
recreation. His personal expenses this year, including his organ, books,
and religious and benevolent contributions, were less than seven hundred
dollars; and of this sum religion and charity took upwards of eighty
dollars. His personal receipts were about thirteen hundred dollars; and
the prospect in his business was highly promising.
Although he continued, as long as he lived, to keep an accurate account
of all personal pecuniary affairs, no more will be copied, because his
principles and practice in regard to them have been sufficiently shown by
these summaries taken from his days of youthful privation, and from these
later ones of sufficiency and promise.
At the beginning of the year 1847, he dissolves partnership with three
members of the firm, and himself and his brother H. take the whole of the
“Rambler.”
Early this year, also, he met for the first time the young lady with whom
he afterwards became united in marriage.
Of the year 1847, he remarks that “it has been one of continual
prosperity in my affairs. My health has been perfect, my plans
prospered, and my spirits good; and, though it has been a year of severe
toil, it has been one of almost unbroken happiness.”
In the early part of the year 1848, he is invited to join another
gentleman in the conduct of a magazine; but he declines the offer.
After considering some time the expediency of himself undertaking the
publication of a new monthly, he matures his plans, and makes definite
calculations. Finally, he commences work upon it; and soon after we read
the following in his journal:—
“_June 2, Friday._ Pleasant and mild. It has been a day of trial and
anxiety to me. After waiting all the week to have one form worked, I was
obliged this afternoon to take them away from ——, and send them into
H.’s. The paper is dried up and works badly.... Thus far I have been
balked in almost every effort I have made for the magazine. In addition
to our trouble with the hand I engaged for foreman last week, Mr. —— put
us to a good deal of trouble by a mistake in counting out the paper, by
which a thousand short of the number were printed, and nearly all the
outside had to be reset.”
Soon after this we occasionally find the record of a day passed in mental
pain and anxiety on account of some pecuniary disappointment.
The day that he was twenty-six years of age, he mentions a new source of
trouble:—
“The boy named ——, whom I took as an apprentice a few weeks ago, was
in the office yesterday (Sunday), with another boy, and amused himself
by breaking the windows in an unoccupied house back of the office by
throwing type at them. I sent for the owner of the building, and brought
the boy before him; and he concluded to let the young scamp off on his
paying damages.”
“_Oct. 31._ I am still overwhelmed with trouble in my business. The first
sheet of the November number of the ‘Library’ is not yet printed....
Heard this morning that my clerk is sick with a fever,—another great
inconvenience.... H—— is almost worn down with anxiety on my behalf.
Everything seems to go wrong, and each succeeding week becomes worse than
the last.”
This year was not an easy one for business men generally, and Walter
Aimwell was not alone in suffering pecuniary difficulties. But all his
troubles did not arise from the general condition of monetary affairs. No
doubt a part must be attributed to a degree of dishonor in the character
of some with whom he had dealings which a man of his purity and principle
would not be likely to suspect.
“_Saturday, Nov. 25._ Another week of care and anxiety is over, and I
find myself anxiously counting the remaining ones before I can hope for a
decided relief!”
Very slowly, very conditionally, and with the continual deferring of hope
which so unnerves the will and wearies the heart, came relief. He was not
a man given to complaining, but here he makes a simple statement of his
general experience for the year 1848:—
“The past year has opened a new chapter in my experience. I have felt
more the _realities_ of life than in any former year; and for the first
time I have begun to learn what is meant by care and anxiety. The year
1848 has been a most trying one for business men, and perhaps I have had
but my share of difficulty; but the trouble I have had in managing my
business, and the unprecedented labor I have had to perform, have proved
a burden from which I would gladly escape. The result has been that I
have sold one-half the ‘Rambler’ at considerably less than its estimated
value, for the purpose of securing assistance and relieving me of a part
of my labor.”
On the first of January, 1849, he enters the marriage relation with Miss
M. A. C. Bodge, of whose amiable qualities it is not becoming for me in
this place to speak.
In the latter part of the year 1848, he received some assistance both in
pecuniary matters, and in the labor of conducting the business, but only
so much as took off the actually unsupportable part of the burden; still
remained as much to bear and to do as he seemed able to endure or to
accomplish. Day after day, week after week, month after month, the short,
significant, daily entries make the reader’s heart ache for the genuine
suffering of an earnest and honest man, thrown, by the requirements of
business intercourse, into relations so formal and artificial in their
nature as to be of themselves somewhat distasteful to his eager, loving
spirit, and also into the unmanageable perplexities that come when, for
any reason, the complicated system of formal relations that is called the
business world, is in any degree deranged. To all this, add contact with
honest misfortune, blundering carelessness, selfishness in the degree of
unblushing dishonor, and wilful malice, and we can conjecture a little of
the much that this pitying, earnest, generous, honorable man was called
to endure.
At one time, in calmer days, Walter Aimwell seriously contemplated
entering the ministry. He was dissuaded from it by a gentleman older than
himself, and already in the profession, on account of the severe and
injurious toil to which almost all the clergy are subject.
Walter Aimwell was not afraid of labor, intense or prolonged. From
the years when he became responsible for his own behavior he scarcely
lost in idleness a minute of his life; but he was persuaded that such
duties would materially shorten a life which, being prolonged, might
finally accomplish more good in the world by labor in other departments.
Conscientiously he submitted to disappointment in one of the dearest
wishes of his heart, and God knew how to turn his wish and abilities into
the channel where they were most needed; but surely it is not possible
that many pastors have more to try the heart or task the brain or exhaust
the body than fell to the lot of Walter Aimwell, the editor and publisher.
To show his almost daily experience, a few passages in his own words
are now quoted; and let it be remembered that this suffering was all in
secret. Until the storm was almost over, even his wife knew nothing of
all that he was combating and enduring. A few hours of utter physical
prostration, now and then, were all the outward tokens, and one would not
be led by such a sign alone to surmise the presence of mental anguish.
The boy at the office might happen to see him in his private room with
his face wet with tears, but he heard no complaint.
One day when a note was due, at twelve o’clock he had but a few dollars
toward it. He says, “I suffered extremely in mind; but, by the blessing
of God, I succeeded in raising the whole amount in season. I am truly
passing through the furnace, but have blessings to be thankful for in the
midst of my trials. I trust my present experience, though bitter now,
will not be without its fruit.”
“_April 30._ Alas for my hopes! I have been most cruelly disappointed in
my calculations. We have made arrangements with _four_ different men to
get the money, every one of whom disappointed us; and, to cap the climax,
Mr. B. was not able to raise a cent at ——. I never knew such a series of
unlucky failures before, and I hardly know what way to turn next. A week
ago I did not suppose there was a doubt that I should be able to raise
—— dollars this week, and I promised more than I otherwise should. But
all is for the best, and I must trust to Providence instead of my own
calculations.”
“_May 4._ It has been a truly wretched day with me,—the anxiety,
disappointment, and shame exceed everything hitherto. And yet I got
through this horrible day after a fashion. Hope still bears me up; for I
recognize in this trial the hand of a kind Father, and I can but believe
that he will soon bring me forth from it a wiser and a better man. How
touching is the thought that—
‘The very hand that strikes the blow
Was wounded once for me!’
These trials, though for the present not joyous but grievous, have, I
trust, been already a blessing to me; and I hope that my daily record of
them, as it hereafter reminds me of my mental suffering, will also keep
green in memory the lessons they have taught me.”
“_May 11._ Another day of torture. The anguish of mind I have endured
yesterday and to-day surpasses description. Except remorse of
conscience, it seems to me there can be no worse suffering than I am now
experiencing. My hope and confidence are still strong, though H. told me
to-day he believed I should be obliged to fail within a month.”
Speaking of an unfortunate action of some who were his friends, he says,
“I am almost discouraged, for no surer way to break me down could have
been adopted.”
Again, he says, “No one knows the bitterness of my life; but, after all,
I feel that I have much to be thankful for, even in these trials.”
“It has been a day of almost perfect misery. Astonished as I was at such
treatment from such a source, I succeeded in keeping calm; but God only
knows what I have suffered to-day. I have almost lost all hope; my plans
are frustrated at every step, and all my struggles and efforts seem to
avail nothing.”
I have copied several of these extracts relating to his pecuniary
difficulties, simply to show the delicacy and depth of his feelings. As
far as his experience was merely pecuniary, I do not suppose it was at
all exceptional. These difficulties occurred at a time when almost every
man in active business was more or less disappointed in his calculations,
and perplexed in the attempt to adjust his affairs in a manner
satisfactory to himself and his business connections. But while numbers
failed, and thus divided, or rather multiplied their perplexities among
their creditors and dependents, Walter Aimwell, with the hopeful nerve of
a hero, and the pious patience of a martyr, persevered in his exhausting
labors, and endured his continual vexations. If it be true that angels,
holier and wiser than we, look on earth with interest in the affairs of
men, some must have loitered with solemn sympathy as they passed near the
solitude in which Walter Aimwell silently grappled with the earth-life.
He conquered. He came out of the conflict with unsoiled brow, and eyes
still calmly looking heavenward.
Of this eventful year he says, “I commenced it by ‘taking to myself a
wife,’—a step I have not yet for one moment regretted. In my domestic
relations I have been as happily situated as I could desire. I have also
during this year exchanged a city for a country home, where I expect to
permanently locate myself. In this, too, I consider myself peculiarly
fortunate, having secured a home in all respects to my mind, and not
expensive either. But the most prominent feature in the past year has
been in my business affairs. I have experienced an amount of suffering
which I can hardly look back upon without shuddering. I have, for months
at a time, been sadly pressed for pecuniary means, and brought so near
to bankruptcy that I had little hope of escape. I have been driven to
the necessity of discontinuing the ‘Library’” (that was the name of the
monthly magazine that he started a year or two before), “and raising
the price of the ‘Rambler.’ But, in the midst of these trials, I have
experienced the deliverance of a kind Providence; and, though often cast
down, I have never been utterly forsaken. The last month of the year
has been preëminently a bright one, and the prospect is as fair as I
could desire. I am, indeed, relieved for the present from all pecuniary
anxiety; and, though I do not expect a plethora of money for a year or
two, I think I shall hereafter have less trouble in my business than I
have heretofore experienced.”
During this period of mingled gloom and brightness, he was obliged to
part with a youth whom for some time he had employed in the office, and
of whom, in his journals, he speaks in the highest terms. Since then,
by a pleasant coincidence, he became a neighbor to his former employer,
in consequence of having been settled as a pastor in the same town. He
became religious while engaged in the “Rambler” office, and the fact
gave great satisfaction to Walter Aimwell. Let him now testify, with the
eloquence of genuine gratitude, what he knew of Walter Aimwell:—
“I remember no man with whom I was ever connected in business relations
with stronger feelings of gratitude and love. He was the kindest friend
of my early years. He always took a great interest in my then present
welfare, and my future happiness. As an evidence of this, I can cite the
following: While in the office I was taken sick, and was confined at home
for six weeks. During that time he frequently called upon me, and every
week my mother received my wages. After I recovered, he ascertained the
amount of the doctor’s bill and paid it himself. This, if I remember
rightly, was at the time of his own pecuniary losses and embarrassments.
It is not necessary for me to say that I _loved_ him. I not only loved,
but I pitied him. For at that time he was suffering greatly from the
dishonest dealings of his agents. I have seen again and again the tears
in his eyes, as he has said to me and others, ‘I cannot pay you this
week.’ He felt a hundred times worse than we did at such times. I have
known him, after he had thus stated his inability to pay his employees,
close the door of his editor’s room, and there, alone, give way to his
grief. He always had a word of counsel and advice for me. He seemed to
understand and to feel the peculiarities of my condition. He furnished me
with books, gave me the privilege of his library, and was always happy to
answer any question that I asked him; so that I looked upon him more as
a friend, a brother, or father, than an employer. Through his advice and
assistance I was thus enabled to make that progress in study of which I
had been deprived by my removal from school at an early age; so that I
can safely say that to his encouragement and advice, given when I had
just left school, I owe much of my success, and much of the literary
tastes I have since had. His advice when I left him to go into another
business, which was occasioned by a change on his part as well, I have
never forgotten. Of all the men I have ever known, my recollections of
him are the best.”