We have a terrible lot to be thankful for,
Now prohibition’s here,
They’ve taken away our whisky, wines and lager beer,
They’ll take away our tobacco next,
Along with the demon rum,
We’ll have a deuce of a lot to be thankful for,
If they leave us chewing gum.
* * * * *
How Do You Get That Way?
A Jewish sergeant at Camp Lee in 1918 was explaining to a rookie the
command, mark time, in the following manner: “Foist you raise yer right
foot six inches in de air and then bring the left foot alongside the
right one.”
* * * * *
“Lovely day, don’t you think,” said the man as he hit his thumb with the
hammer.
* * * * *
Two Swedes went to Ireland
To kiss the blarney stone,
But they couldn’t catch their lutefisk
Where the River Shannon flows.
* * * * *
Willie, your face has changed quite a bit.
Yes, mother, dear, I’ve been washing it.
* * * * *
A change of wives ofttimes improves one’s disposition.
* * * * *