_How under the pretence of begging, he stole a Cloak, and
with that went to a Gaming Ordinary; what a bold
Adventure he made there, and the success thereof._
Parting from this good Woman, I began to think that the Art of stealing
might be reckoned amongst the liberal Sciences; for though it may be
called an _Handicraft_, yet it cannot be looked on as _Mechanick_. This
is the _Art_, the right Practice whereof is the true _Philosopher’s
stone_, the _Elixer_ of life; with which many turn _Poyson_ into
_Medicine_, coarse cloath into cloath of Gold, hunger into fulness and
satiety, convert rags into Sattins, and all this done by a quick wit,
and slight of hand.
The Antiquity and Dignity of this Profession, I shall relate elsewhere,
and shall proceed on in my Adventures.
The Evening or Twilight being come, I chanced to look in at a door, and
perceiving none at hand, I went in boldly, resolving if I met any to beg
an Almes of them, having before premeditated what I had to say, _viz._,
that I was a poor distressed young Gentleman, my Father, Mother, nay,
all my Relations I knew, being dead, and that not knowing what to do,
was forced (under the Covert of the night) to beseech the assistance of
charitable minded persons. But in my way found none that should occasion
my using this form.
I found in the Parlor a good Camlet-cloak, which I made bold to put on,
and so very gravely walked out of the house; but coming to the door, you
must think there was _Wild-fire_ in my breech, that hastned me out of
the street. Being gotten a Bow-shot off I thought my self indifferent
secure, so that I slackned my pace, but could not (if my Life lay on it)
forbear looking this way, that way, sometimes over one shoulder,
sometimes over the other: thinking of what dangerous consequence this
might prove. I resolved to walk more confidently, and not let my eyes
discover any thing of fear, by reason of guilt. This loose garment had
so of a sudden Metamorphosed those thoughts I had of my self but a
little before, my eye being continually on my Cloak, I could not conceit
my self less then the best of the young Templers, that walk the Streets
to show themselves: coming into _Bell-yard_, I observed several Gallants
go into an House, and others to come out, which put me to the curiosity
of enquiring, what, or whose House it was: Who told me it was a Gaming
Ordinary. Nay, then (thought I) it is as free for me to enter as others;
and so went in. I looked on a while, but my fingers itched to be at it.
Why, thought I, have I not adventured a _Gaol_, a _Whipping_, or an
_Hanging_, and shall I now fear a _Kicking_, a _Pumping_, or a
_Bog-house_? These considerations made me resolutely take up the Box,
and I threw a Main, which was 7: a great deal of money was presently set
me, I knew it was but to little purpose to baulk them, so that
confidently I threw at all, which I nicked with eleven, and so continued
holding seven hands together. Perceiving I had got a considerable
quantity of money, and fearing I might loose that which I had so boldly
adventured for, I thanked my propitious Stars and the Gentlemen, who had
rather lose their money than suspect any that hath the Garb of one well
Extracted; and so bade them good night. A priviledge too many _Skarking
Ubiquitarians_ use without interruption, being most commonly in use with
the _Waiters_ and _Box-keepers_, who will be sure to speak in the behalf
of such confident Cheats; if they lose, pretending great knowledge of
them, that they are men of repute, civil and responsible; which
frequently so prevails upon a _Mouth_, that he hath not a _word_ to say
more. Questionless Ordinaries were first impartially founded,
interdicting all play but which was upon the _Square_; but since, by the
connivance of the _Box-keepers_, when the Table grows thin, and few at
it, let the stranger beware: for the _Box-keeper_ shall walk off,
pretending some speedy dispatch of a business concerning the _House of
Office_, _&c._ whilst your Antagonist shall put the change upon you, or
make use of his own _Jack-in-a-box_, and then had you 500 _l._ (would
you set like a _Gamester_) he will have it to a penny in a short while:
with whom the _Waiter_ goes snips. If at any time such they know want an
_High flyer_, _&c._ they know how and when to supply him.
Full fraught with this good fortune, and so laden I was ready to sink, I
resolved to moor my Vessel in the next Harbour. The Landlord whence I
came, was very loath to entertain me, his lodger having served him a
scurvy trick the night before, conveying out of the window, the
Furniture of a room that cost him 40 _l._ besides a great silver
Tankerd, which the Gentleman would have filled with stale Beer and
Sugar, to stand by his bed-side all night, pretending it was his
custome. But I desiring him to lay up a parcel of money for me till the
next morning, quite put out the eye of his Jealousie. I shewed my self
that night very exceeding noble, concealing my success at play, that he
might conclude the greatness of my expence proceeded from the nobleness
of my nature, having a good estate to back it. I was conducted to bed
with many Ceremonies, and abundance of respect. Sleep I could not, for
thinking how to dispose of my self.
I had experimented the various exigences and extremities an unsetled
condition is accompanied withall; and knowing how securely I could
purloin from my Master, if I would moderate my theft, I concluded to
supplicate my Master by a Letter for my reception into his service, not
forgetting my Mistresses _quondam_ kindnesses. If my Master should
refuse to re-entertain me, I had by me what might supply my necessities,
till I had re-considered how to improve my stock, or bestow my self. Not
to delay time, the next day I wrote him this Letter.
_SIR_,
_Having seriously considered the greatness of my folly in
running from so good a Master, (whom I may more rightly intitle
Father) with tears I beg mercy from Heaven, and forgiveness from
you. Mitigate my offence by revolving in your mind the fewness
of my years, which makes me (as it doth most others) prone to
rambling fancies: look then favourably on my long absence from
you, as a meer exiliency, a youthful elapse, which maturity of
age may rectifie. If you can forgive my follies, I will study to
forget them, and daily endeavour the propagation of my fidelity
in the remainder of my time. By the Bearer hereof you may
signifie your pleasure._
_Sir, I am_
Your cordially penitent
Servant, _&c._
With much joy my Master read this Letter, and hastened the Bearer away
to bring me to him. Having converted my silver into Gold, sowing it in
my Collar and Wastband, and putting my self into a Garb convenient for
his sight, I went to him.