"Their only labour is to kill the time;
And labour dire it is, and weary woe.
They sit--they lounge--turn o'er some idle rhyme:
Then rising sudden--to the glass they go,
Or saunter forth with loitering step and slow."
_Castle of Indolence_.
Captain Oughton, who commanded the _Windsor Castle_, was an original. His
figure was short and thick-set, his face broad, and deeply pitted with the
small-pox; his nose, an apology for a nose, being a small tubercle arising
midway between his eyes and mouth, the former of which were small, the
latter wide, and displaying a magnificent row of white teeth. On the whole,
it was impossible to look in his face without being immediately struck with
his likeness to a bull-dog. His temperament and his pursuits were also
analogous; he was a great pugilist, knew the merits of every man in the
ring, and the precise date and circumstances attending every battle which
had been fought for the previous thirty years. His conversation was at all
times interlarded with the slang terms appropriated to the science to which
he was so devoted. In other points he was a brave and trustworthy officer,
although he valued the practical above the theoretical branches of his
profession, and was better pleased when superintending the mousing of a
stay or the strapping of a block than when "flooring" the sun, as he termed
it, to ascertain the latitude, or "breaking his noddle against the old
woman's," in taking a lunar observation. Newton had been strongly
recommended to him, and Captain Oughton extended his hand as to an old
acquaintance, when they met on the quarter-deck. Before they had taken a
dozen turns up and down, Captain Oughton inquired if Newton could handle
the mauleys; and on being assured in the negative, volunteered his
instruction during their passage out.
"You heard the end of it, I suppose?" said Captain Oughton, in continuance.
"The end of what, sir?"
"What!--why the fight. Spring beat. I've cleared three hundred by him."
"Then, sir, I am very glad that Spring beat," replied Newton.
"I'll back him against a stone heavier any day in the week. I've got the
newspaper in the cabin, with the fight--forty-seven rounds; but we can't
read it now--we must see after these soldiers and their traps. Look at
them," continued Captain Oughton, turning to a party of the troops ordered
for a passage, who were standing on the gangway and booms; "every man Jack
with his tin pot in his hand, and his greatcoat on. Twig the drum-boy, he
has turned his coat--do you see?--with the lining outwards to keep it
clean. By Jove, that's a _wrinkle_!"
"How many officers do you expect, Captain Oughton?"
"I hardly know--they make such alterations in their arrangements; five or
six, I believe. The boat went on shore for them at nine o'clock. They have
sent her back, with their compliments, seven times already, full of
luggage. There's one lieutenant--I forget his name--whose chests alone
would fill up the main-deck. There's six under the half-deck," said Captain
Oughton, pointing to them.
"Lieutenant Winterbottom," observed Newton, reading the name.
"I wish to Heaven that he had remained the winter, or that his chests were
all to the bottom! I don't know where the devil we are to stow them. Oh,
here they come! Boatswain's mate, 'tend the side there.'"
In a minute, or thereabouts, the military gentlemen made their appearance
one by one on the quarter-deck, scrutinising their gloves as they bade
adieu to the side-ropes, to ascertain if they had in any degree been
defiled by the adhesive properties of the pitch and tar.
Captain Oughton advanced to receive them, "Welcome, gentlemen," said he,
"welcome on board. We trip our anchor in half an hour. I am afraid that I
have not the pleasure of knowing your names, and must request the honour of
being introduced."
"Major Clavering, sir," said the major, a tall, handsome man, gracefully
taking off his hat: "the officers who accompany are (waving his hand
towards them in succession), Lieutenant Winterbottom--"
Lieutenant Winterbottom bowed.
"I've had the pleasure of reading Lieutenant Winterbottom's name several
times this forenoon," observed Captain Oughton, as he returned the salute.
"You refer to my luggage, I'm afraid, Captain Oughton."
"Why, if I must say it, I certainly think you have enough for a general."
"I can only reply that I wish my rank were equal to my luggage; but it is a
_general_ complaint every time I have the misfortune to embark. I trust,
Captain Oughton, it will be the only one you will have to make of me during
the passage."
Major Clavering, who had waited during this dialogue, continued--"Captain
Majoribanks, whom I ought to apologise to for not having introduced
first--"
"Not at all, major; you just heard the brevet rank which Winterbottom's
baggage has procured him."
"Not the first time a man has obtained rank through his 'baggage,'"
observed one of the officers, _sotto voce_.
"Mr Ansell, Mr Petres, Mr Irving."
The necessary bows were exchanged, and Mr Williams, the first mate, desired
to show the officers to their respective accommodations, when he would be
able to ascertain what part of their luggage was required, and be enabled
to strike the remainder down into the after-hold.
As the officers followed the first mate down the companion-ladder, Captain
Oughton looked at Mr Ansell, and observed to Newton, "That fellow would
_peel_ well."
The _Windsor Castle_ sailed, and in a few days was clear of the channel.
Newton, whose thoughts were of Isabel Revel, felt not that regret at
quitting the country, usually attached to those who leave all dear to them
behind. He knew that it was by following up his profession alone that he
ever could have a chance of obtaining her; and this recollection, with the
hopes of again beholding the object of his affections, lightened his heart
to joy, as the ship scudded across the Bay of Biscay, before a N.E. gale.
That he had little chance at present of possessing her, he knew; but hope
leads us on, and no one more than the youth who is in love.
The table of Captain Oughton was liberally supplied, and the officers
embarked proved (as they almost invariably do) to be pleasant,
gentlemanlike companions. The boxing-gloves were soon produced by Captain
Oughton, who soon ascertained that in the officer who "would peel so well"
he had found his match. The mornings were passed away in sparring, fencing,
reading, walking the deck, or lolling on the hen-coops upon the poop. The
announcement of the dinner-hour was a signal for rejoicing; and they
remained late at the table, doing ample justice to the captain's excellent
claret. The evening was finished with cards, cigars, and brandy _pawnee_.
Thus passed the time away for the first three weeks of the passage, during
which period all parties had become upon intimate terms.
But the voyage is, in itself, most tedious; and more tedious to those who
not only have no duty to perform, but have few resources. As soon as the
younger officers thought they might take a liberty, they examined the
hen-coops, and selecting the most promising-looking cocks, trimmed them for
fighting; chose between themselves, as their own property, those which they
most approved of, and for some days fed and sparred them, to get them into
wind, and ascertain the proper way in which they should be spurred. In the
meantime, two pairs of spurs were, by their directions, clandestinely made
by the armourer of the ship, and, when ready, they took advantage of the
time when Captain Oughton was every day employed with the ship's reckoning,
and the poulterer was at his dinner (viz., from twelve to one), to fight a
main. The cocks which were killed in these combats were returned to the
hen-coops, and supposed by the poulterer, who had very often had a glass of
grog, to have quarrelled within the bars.
"Steward," said Captain Oughton, "why the devil do you give us so many
fowls for dinner? the stock will never last out the voyage: two roast
fowls, two boiled fowls, curried fowl, and chicken pie! What can you be
thinking of?"
"I spoke to the poulterer on the subject, sir; he constantly brings me down
fowls, and he tells me that they kill each other fighting."
"Fighting! never heard of fowls fighting in a coop before. They must be all
game fowls."
"That they are, most of them," said Mr Petres; "I have often seen them
fighting when I have been on the poop."
"So have I," continued Ansell; "I have seen worse cocks in the pit."
"Well, it's very odd; I never lost a cock in this way in all my voyages.
Send the poulterer here; I must inquire about it."
"Yes, sir," replied the steward; and he quitted the cabin.
With the exception of the major, who knew nothing of the circumstances, the
officers thought it advisable to decamp, that they might not be present
when the _dénouement_ took place. The poulterer made his appearance, was
interrogated, and obliged, in his own defence, to criminate the parties,
corroborating his assertions by producing a pair of spurs found upon a cock
which had been killed, and thrown behind the coop in a hurry, at the
appearance of Captain Oughton on deck.
"I am sorry that my officers should have taken such a liberty," observed
the major, gravely.
"Oh, never mind, major, only allow me to be even with them; I shouldn't
have minded if I had seen the fighting. I think you said that you would
like to exercise your men a little this afternoon?"
"I did; that is, if not inconvenient."
"Not in the least, major; the quarter-deck is at your service. I presume
you do not superintend yourself."
"Yes, I generally do."
"Well, don't this time; but let all the officers; and then I shall be able
to play them a little trick that will make us all square."
Major Clavering consented. The officers were ordered up to drill their men.
Captain Majoribanks and Mr Irving had one party at the platoon exercise.
"Third man, your hand a little higher on the barrel of your musket. As you
were; support--the word support is only a caution--arms,--too--too."
"Two and two makes four," observed one of the seamen.
Lieutenant Winterbottom had another party on the leeside of the
quarter-deck. "Ram down--cartridge--No. 12, slope your musket a little
more--_too_--_too_--only two taps at the bottom of the barrel.
Return--ramrods. No. 4, why don't you draw up the heel of your right leg
level with the other? Recollect now, when you shoulder arms, to throw your
muskets up smartly.--Shoulder--as you were--the word shoulder is only a
caution; shoulder--arms. Dress up a little, No. 8, and don't stick your
stomach out in that way."
Mr Ansell and Mr Petres had two fatigue parties on the poop, without
muskets. "To the right--face--to the right face. To the right--face--to the
right--face."
"It's a dead calm with them soldiers--head round the compass," said one of
the seamen to another.
"To the left--face--quick march, to the left--turn--to the
right--turn--close file--mark time--right--left--right--left--forward."
"Them 'ere chap's legs all going together put one in mind of a
centipee--don't they, Tom?"
"Yes, but they don't get on quite so fast. Holloh, what pipe's that?--'All
hands, air bedding.'"
The ship was hauled close to the wind, which was light. At the pipe, the
sailors below ran up the hatchway, and those on deck threw down their work.
In a minute every hammock was out of the netting, and every seaman busy at
unlashing.
"Now, major, we had better go into the cabin," said Captain Oughton,
laughing. "I shall, I can assure you."
Beds and blankets which are not aired or shook more than once a month, are
apt to be very full of what is termed _fluff_ and blanket _hairs_, and they
have a close smell, by no means agreeable. The sailors, who had an idea
that the order had not been given inconsiderately, were quite delighted,
and commenced shaking their blankets on the forecastle and weather gangway,
raising a cloud, which the wind carried aft upon the parties exercising
upon the quarter-deck.
"What the devil is all this?" cried Captain Majoribanks, looking forward
with dismay. "Order--arms."
Lieutenant Winterbottom and half of his party were now seized with a fit of
coughing. "Confound it!--shut--pans--handle--upon my soul I'm choked."
"This is most excessively disagreeable," observed Mr Petres; "I made up my
mind to be _tarred_ when I came on board, but I had no idea that we should
be _feathered_."
"Support--d--n it, there's no supporting this!" cried Captain Majoribanks.
"Where's Major Clavering? I'll ask to dismiss the men."
"They are dismissing a great many little men, forward, I suspect," said the
first mate, laughing. "I cannot imagine what induced Captain Oughton to
give the order: we never shake bedding except when the ship's before the
wind."
This last very consoling remark made it worse than all; the officers were
in an agony. There was not one of them who would not have stood the chance
of a volley from a French regiment rather than what they considered that
they were exposed to. But without Major Clavering's permission they could
not dismiss their men. Captain Majoribanks hastened to the cabin, to
explain their very unpleasant situation, and received the major's
permission to defer the exercise.
"Well, gentlemen," said Captain Oughton, "what is the matter?"
"The matter!" replied Ansell. "Why, my flesh creeps all over me. Of all the
thoughtless acts, Captain Oughton, it really beats--"
"Cock-fighting," interrupted the captain, with a loud laugh. "Now we are
quits."
The officers hastened below to wash and change their dress after this very
annoying retaliation on the part of Captain Oughton. When they felt
themselves again clean and comfortable, their good humour returned,
although they voted their captain not to be very refined in his ideas, and
agreed with him that his practical joke beat "cock-fighting."
I believe that there are no classes of people who embark with more regret,
or quit a ship with more pleasure, than military men. Nor is it to be
wondered at, if we consider the antithesis which is presented to their
usual mode of life. Few military men are studious, or inclined to reading,
which is almost the only resource which is to be found against the tedium
of long confinement and daily monotony. I do not say this reproachfully, as
I consider it arises from the peculiarity of their profession, and must be
considered to be more their misfortune than their fault. They enter upon a
military life just after they have left school,--the very period at which,
from previous and forced application, they have been surfeited with books
_usque ad nauseam_. The parade, dress; the attention paid to them, which
demands civilities in return; society, and the preference shown by the fair
sex; their happy and well-conducted mess; the collecting together of so
many young men, with all their varied plans of amusement, into which the
others are easily persuaded to enter, with just sufficient duty on guard,
or otherwise, not to make the duty irksome; all delight too much at first,
and eventually, from habit, too much occupy their minds, to afford time for
study.
In making this observation, I must be considered to speak generally. There
are many studious, many well-stored minds, many men of brilliant talents,
who have improved the gift of nature by constant study and reflection, and
whose conduct must be considered as the more meritorious, from having
resisted or overcome the strong temptation to do otherwise which is offered
by their profession.
"I wish," said Irving, who was stretched out his full length on one of the
coops abaft, with the front of his cap drawn over his eyes--"I wish this
cursed voyage was at an end. Every day the same thing; no variety--no
amusement;--curry for breakfast--brandy _pawnee_ as a finish. I really
begin to detest the sight of a cigar or a pack of cards."
"Very true," replied Ansell, who was stretched upon an adjacent coop in all
the listlessness of idleness personified--"very true, Irving; I begin to
think it worse than being quartered in a country town inhabited by
nobodies, where one has nothing to do but to loll and spit over the bridge
all day, till the bugle sounds for dinner."
"Oh! that was infinitely better; at least, you could walk away when you
were tired, or exchange a word or two with a girl as she passed over it, on
her way to market."
"Why don't you take a book, Irving?" observed the major, laying down the
one with which he had been occupied, to join the conservation.
"A book, major? Oh, I've read until I am tired."
"What have you read since you embarked ?" inquired his senior.
"Let me see--Ansell, what have I read?"
"Read!--nothing at all--you know that."
"Well, perhaps so; we have no mess-newspapers here: the fact is, major, I
am not very partial to reading--I am not in the habit of it. When on shore
I have too much to do; but I mean to read by-and-bye."
"And pray, when may that by-and-bye be supposed to arrive?"
"Oh! some day when I am wounded or taken prisoner, and cannot do anything
else; then I shall read a good deal. Here's Captain Oughton--Captain
Oughton, do you read much?"
"Yes, Mr Irving, I read a great deal."
"Pray, may I take the liberty to ask you what you read?"
"What I read! Why, I read Horsburgh's Directory:--and I read--I read all
the fights."
"I think," observed Ansell, "that if a man gets through the newspaper and
the novels of the day, he does a great deal."
"He reads a great deal, I grant you," replied the major; "but of what value
is that description of reading?"
"There, major," replied Ansell, "we are at issue. I consider a knowledge of
the passing events of the day, and a recollection of the facts which have
occurred during the last twenty years, to be more valuable than all the
ancient records in existence. Who talks of Cæsar or Xenophon nowadays,
except some Cambridge or Oxford prig? and of what value is that knowledge
in society? The escape of a modern pickpocket will afford more matter of
conversation than the famous retreat of the ten thousand."
"To be sure," replied Captain Oughton; "and a fair stand-up fight between
Humphreys and Mendoza create more interest than the famous battles of--,
I'm sure I forget."
"Of Marathon and Thermopylæ; they will do," added Ansell.
"I grant," replied the major, "that it is not only unnecessary, but
conceited in those who would show their reading; but this does not disprove
the advantages which are obtained. The mind, well fed, becomes enlarged:
and if I may use a simile, in the same way as your horse proves his good
condition by his appearance, without people ascertaining the precise
quantity of oats which has been given him; so the mind shows, by its
general vigour and power of demonstration, that it has been well supplied
with 'hard food.'"
"Very _hard food_ indeed," replied Captain Oughton; "nuts that I never
could crack when I was at school, and don't mean to break my teeth with
now. I agree with Mr Ansell, 'that sufficient for the day is the knowledge
thereof.'"
"Well, as the tree of knowledge was the tree of evil, perhaps that is the
correct reading," replied Ansell, laughing; "Captain Oughton, you are a
very sensible man; I hope we shall see you often at our mess, when we're
again on shore."
"You may say so now," replied Captain Oughton, bluntly, "and so have many
more said the same thing to me; but you soldiers have cursed short memories
in that way after you have landed."
"I trust, Captain Oughton," replied Major Clavering, "that you will not
have to make that accusation general."
"Oh! never mind, major; I never am affronted; the offer is made in
kindness, and at the time sincere; but when people get on shore, and are so
occupied with their own amusements, it is not to be wondered at if they are
thoughtless and forget. At one time, it did annoy me, I confess; for when I
say I should be happy to see a man, I mean it; and if I did not mean it, I
never would ask him. I thought that other people did the same; but I have
lived long enough to discover that a 'general invitation' means, 'don't
come at all.'"
"Then I most certainly shall not say one word on the subject at present,"
replied the major. "How many bells was that?"
"Six; dinner will be on the table in a few minutes."
"Then, gentlemen, we had better go down and prepare. Why, Mr Irving, you
have not shaved this morning!"
"No, major, I mean to do it after dinner."
"I should rather think that you intended to say _before_," replied Major
Clavering.
This gentlemanlike hint was taken by the young ensign, who was aware that
Major Clavering, although invariably polite, even in reproof, was not a
commanding officer to be trifled with; and Mr Irving made his appearance at
the dinner-table with his "chin new reaped," and smooth as if appertaining
to one of the fairer sex.