the same time proved the guilt of Saul Jan and Kulmuck. I am glad to say
that both these ruffians were sentenced to be hanged. Great efforts to
save Saul Jan were made by the Moplahs, who declared that he had been
defrauded of his _undoubted_ rights, and that Lutchmon Sing deserved
his fate. And nothing would convince these brutal and savage disciples
of a brutal and sensual creed that the murder deserved capital
punishment. They threatened resistance, used very violent language, and
seemed altogether so highly irritated and incensed that three companies
of the European regiment stationed at Canamore were marched from thence
to Tollicherry in order to overawe them, and along with the three
companies half a battery of Horse Artillery. These decisive and
judicious measures had the effect desired; the would-be rebels thought
ball cartridges, grape-shot, and fixed bayonets unpleasant things to
face, and that under the circumstances discretion was the better part of
valour. The execution, therefore, took place without either disturbance
or bloodshed.
No. XI.
AN HOUR LOST AT MR. G.'S DINNER.
After the execution of the two Moplahs for the murder of poor Lutchmon
Sing, nothing worth recording took place at Tollicherry during some
months. People got up in the morning, went to bed at night, and ate
their dinners in a very routine, humdrum sort of way, and nothing
occurred to vary the monotony of existence except a new number of
Lever's 'Charles O'Malley,' or the issue of cards for a dinner or
evening party at the First Judge's house, which was a regular monthly
institution with that most hospitable and generous man.
Things had been going on in this way for about three months when, so far
as concerned my brother, there was a change, which entailed on him
considerable anxiety, and a good deal of extra work. An officer of the
Bombay army was sent to Tollicherry on sick certificate. He had landed,
and had, by means of his servant, taken a small house in the town before
my brother heard anything of him. He had, indeed, been three days so
located when Lieutenant Mitchel, who was in command of the detachment
usually stationed at the place, met my brother in his morning walk, and
told him of the advent of Mr. M. of the ---- Infantry, Bombay. 'Hasn't
he sent you his case, and the private statement of the regimental
medical officer?' asked Mitchel. 'He has not,' said my brother;
'indeed, until you informed me of it, I was as ignorant of the arrival
here of Mr. M. as I was of his existence. But now, as he is here on sick
certificate, I shall go and see him, though it was his duty in the first
place to have sent me his papers.'
'Then,' returned Mitchel, 'we'll go and see him together; we may as well
walk that way as any other.' So said, so done. On their way they met
Captain B., who, after good-morning, inquired if they had got 'a purwoke
to Waughan's, because if you haven't you will have. I saw the cards.'
'Well,' said Mitchel, 'V. deserves to be called the punir of
Tollicherry: the place would be nothing without him. And then he gives
such champagne and claret; it's really worth something to get a
"purwoke," as our friend says, to his house.' 'You should be tender in
making your quotations,' whispered my brother. 'I'll tender an
apologue,' said Mitchel quietly, 'if you wish.' Here Captain B. parted
from his companions, his road lying in a different direction.
When he was gone, my brother remarked to Mitchel: 'I think if you did
"tender an apologue," as you put it, you would only make bad worse. Poor
B. does not know that he made any mistake, nor does he perceive that you
were laughing at him; but if you make any apology, however "tender" you
may be in your mode of expression, he cannot fail to perceive it.'
'Well, _magister meus_, I am schooled. I will hold my peace, though he
breaks the Queen's English into many a piece; but I must keep the peace
as well as hold my peace, or you will be jealous, and say I have stolen
your trade, and set up an opposition shop, etc., etc.; and I should be
sorry to run counter to your wishes, as the peaceful disposition evinced
this morning clearly proves.' 'If you would weigh your words over your
counter a little more carefully there would be some hope of your
succeeding in business. As it is, your stock-in-trade is rather of a
meagre description; it is neither bonded stock, nor consolidated stock,
nor foreign stock, nor even rolling stock. It can only, I think, be
described as a stock of assurance, though I'll be sworn you possess no
life policy, and----' 'Oh, stop!' said Mitchel; 'you have the devil's
own faculty of "iteration," as the fat knight says, and, moreover, here
we are at M.'s bungalow.'
But at first it was in vain that the two visitors sought an entrance.
After knocking repeatedly at the door of the house, which was closed, no
response could be obtained. 'This is queer,' said Mitchel. 'Are the
people all dead? What is the reason that no servant or maty boy makes
his appearance? It's clearly a case of enchanted castle, inhabited by an
ogre who never comes out till night-time.' 'I think' said my brother, 'I
can find a key to the ogre's castle door.' And accordingly he walked
over to the godown attached to the house. He had observed that the door
belonging to one of these outdoor offices had been cautiously opened so
far as to permit those inside to see who they were who were so bent on
getting into the house, without being seen themselves. The door in
question, it is true, had been again cautiously closed, but the opening
and shutting of it having been noticed further defence was vain. My
brother threatened all kinds of pains and penalties, and Mitchel struck
the door so violently with his foot that the whole place shook again. He
was about to repeat his efforts when the garrison surrendered, only
entreating that the Saiblogue would have a moment's patience.
'Suspension of arms' having been thus agreed to, the door was, after
about a minute's delay, unbarred and opened. 'You d----d rascal,' said
Mitchel, 'what do you mean by keeping us waiting here without answering
our summons?' 'Nay, Saib: what for master angry? My master sick; he
tell he not see anybody.' 'Aye, but he must see us. I am the medical
officer to whose charge he is consigned while sick, and if he should
want help in any way he is bound to put himself in communication with
this gentleman, who is in command of the detachment stationed here. Now,
open the door of the house and let us see your master.' 'But, Saib, my
master no give order; he tell no see.' 'You are an impudent scoundrel,'
said Mitchel, 'and I have a good mind to give you a taste of my
riding-whip for refusing to do what you are ordered to do, knowing who
we are.' 'Pray be quiet, Mitchel,' said my brother, 'and let me deal
with this fellow, whom, to tell you the truth, I rather like for his
sturdy fidelity to his master. Now you, sir, listen to what I say. If
you do not open the door of the house I shall have to complain of you to
the Zillah Judge, who will be in Court shortly after ten o'clock, and
you will get punished, and peons will be sent to force open the door, so
that you see all you can gain by resistance is a few hours, for which
you will bring trouble on yourself and your master.' 'By Jove,' said
Mitchel, 'you have given him better terms than I would have done. But
take your own way; I shall leave you to settle it.'
The maty was evidently undecided, but the calm determination shown by my
brother convinced him that it would be best to submit to what he felt he
could not successfully oppose or prevent, so after a little hesitation
he said: 'Master too strong; I do as master order, but my master very
angry.' 'That's a sensible fellow,' said my brother. 'I will tell your
master that you held out to the utmost to obey his orders.' Then the
man, making a low salaam, said: 'Master good master, but not know all;
when master go in then master see, and then master know.'
Surely no words could express the impression made on the minds of the
visitors, or explain the situation more clearly, than the maty's words,
however poor the English. They found Mr. M. in his shirt and trousers
lying on a cot, round which were strewed beer and brandy bottles, some
empty, some untouched; the smell of these liquids was very strong, and
the man himself was really an object equally of compassion and disgust.
His face was so swelled and bloated that his eyes were partly closed,
and its hue was fiery red; he either would not or could not speak.
Hiccoughs, alternating with a sort of stertorous breathing, were the
only sounds he emitted; his skin was dry and hot, and his pulse
bounding. The unfortunate man did not seem able to rise and scarcely to
move. After sending in the sweeper to remove all nuisances, and to
cleanse the room in every possible way, doors and windows not admitting
sun being kept wide open, the whole of the bottles were removed, and
placed in a godown under lock and key, only a very small allowance for
the day being left out in charge of the servant. Finally, the official
papers, which the boy knew where to put his hands on, were given to my
brother. Before his departure he ordered the patient's body, head, neck,
and arms to be sponged, constantly or frequently, with weak vinegar and
water. He then left word that he should see Mr. M. again after
breakfast.
On reaching home he took up a letter that was addressed to him by Mr.
M., senior, in which he spoke of his son and his son's evil habits in a
very fond and parental way, making all sorts of excuses for a low and
disgusting indulgence that admits of no excuse, except that the person
exhibiting it had lost all self-control, which might with equal
propriety be put forth to defend any other crime. The writer entreated
that my brother would use representation, persuasion, and every moral
means in aid of his medical treatment, in order to reform as well as
cure his unfortunate son. He then explained his son's position in the
army. He said that, by means of family interest, he had got his son
gazetted for a staff appointment, but that it had not been taken up, in
consequence of his son's sickness, which, through the kindness of the
medical officer, my brother would find put down in the case as _fever_.
'In his private letter to you,' continued the old gentleman, 'I cannot
tell what he has said, but whatever this may be, I should esteem it a
lasting obligation if you would kindly put down in your official report
the same disease, _fever_;' and that if my brother would be so kind as
to do this, his son could be sent home on sick certificate for three
years without losing his claim to a staff appointment, and that not only
he, but the whole family would be for ever grateful.
Long before my brother got to the end of this precious epistle, he felt
so indignant and disgusted with the doting and unprincipled old writer,
that he more than once determined to return the letter in a blank
envelope. He did not, however, act on his first thought; he remembered
old Mr. M.'s gray hairs, and that he was a father who was wrapped up in
his only son. My brother contented himself with acknowledging the old
gentleman's letter as briefly as possible, adding that he would do all
that was in his power for his son.
He then glanced over the official case, which was so drawn up as to
afford little information as to the state of the patient. This was of no
consequence; what my brother had seen was quite enough. The private
letter was a degree more truthful; but the facts were so softened, and
so many suppositions were introduced in order to account for the
symptoms, that it was, or appeared to be, more calculated to conceal the
real condition of the patient than to make it evident. My brother
thought of Talleyrand's _mot_ regarding language, smiled, and then sat
down to breakfast with his wife.
This narrative not being either a medical treatise or report, my
brother omits all details of the treatment of the case. It must suffice
to say that he did his best, and at first with such success that hope of
reform began to be entertained. It was, however, a delusive hope. The
patient broke all his promises, secretly obtained from the Parsee
shopkeeper a fresh supply of beer and brandy, and again reduced himself
to much the same state as that in which he was first found. The
intoxicating liquids were again taken from him, placed under lock and
key, and then two Sepoys were placed on guard night and day at Mr. M.'s
bungalow to prevent the entrance of anything whatever not ordered by my
brother. Mr. M., on finding himself thus forcibly controlled, was at
first so furious and violent that it became necessary to employ peons to
restrain him and prevent him from making his escape.
When he found that neither threats, nor force, nor bribes would avail
either to procure him liquor or favour his escape from control, he
became sullen and morose, and refused even to speak in answer to
questions. Lieutenant Mitchel had all along felt a great interest in the
case, and had furnished the guard in the frankest and readiest manner.
Very early one morning he met my brother en route to visit Mr. M. 'I'll
go with you,' said Mitchel, 'if you have no objection.' 'None in the
world,' returned my brother. 'You have seen the patient several times;
you saw him when I first took charge of him, and you know how
persistently he has destroyed his chances of getting better.' 'Yes,'
replied Mitchel, 'he has done all you say; the madness for drink has got
hold of him, and until this rage or madness moderates or passes away for
the time, I fear you will get no good of him; but still, I pity the poor
devil!' 'Oh, pity him as much as you please,' returned my brother, 'so
long as you don't give him anything to drink.' This brought the
speakers to M.'s house. They went upstairs almost together, and as they
entered his room they perceived that he was lying on his cot in his
shirt and long drawers.
As my brother approached him to feel his pulse and skin, his features
assumed a very ugly scowl, and at the same time he put his right hand
under his pillow. This action my brother did not notice at the instant,
but Mitchel did, and as quick as light pinned M.'s hand with both his. A
struggle ensued; my brother held down M.'s left hand while Mitchel drew
out the right, grasping a large carving-knife, which he had secreted
under his pillow. It was quickly taken from him by the superior force
present, and although he made desperate efforts to disengage his right
hand, Mitchel's double grip was too firm for him. He kept his hand on
the bed while the others unclasped the fingers, thus no one was wounded.
It was clear that Mitchel's quick eye and movement had saved my
brother's life. Speaking of the affair afterwards, Mitchel said: 'I did
not like the look he gave at you, and when, in reply to your request to
let you feel his pulse, he put his hand under the pillow, I suspected
something, and luckily, on the impulse of the moment, pinned his hand.'
'Luckily indeed for me,' said my brother; 'six inches of cold steel
under one's ribs is not a pleasant experience at any time of day; yet I
should certainly have had to make it this fine morning but for you. I
cannot well thank you; your own manly heart will do it for me better
than my poor words can.'
'Halt, dress!' said Mitchel; 'none of your heroics. I'm right glad,
though, that none of us got hurt; that's a very ugly sort of weapon,
that long pointed knife, at close quarters especially.'
All this passed in less than two minutes; then the maniac, for such the
man was at the time, was carefully secured by soft bandages, his head
was shaved, and cold lotion constantly applied to it. Every knife and
fork in the house was kept out of the room, he was allowed no food but
what he could take with a spoon, and a constant guard was kept in the
room as well as at the door.
As Mitchel and my brother were leaving the poor victim of alcoholic
stimulation, G. came up to them to inquire how M. was going on. Poor G.
turned quite pale on learning how near murder had been to them that
morning, and specially near to my brother. However, he soon rallied,
and, after a few words of congratulation, he said: 'This day week I hold
you both engaged to dine with me; I mean to give a dinner in honour of
Mitchel for this morning's work.'
'All right,' said Mitchel, 'I'll be most happy to go and punish your
champagne; but don't make mountains of molehills; don't exhibit me as a
sort of wild animal of a new species just caught; don't do that, pray.
The Doctor was going to launch out into something, but I managed to stop
him, as I must try and stop you.'
'Very well,' said G., 'as you are to be the king of the feast, you must
have your own way, and we won't say one word as to why it is given. We
won't even ask if a knife has a sharp point or a keen edge.'
'For fear of its wounding or cutting me,' said Mitchel. 'That's capital;
I always thought you a comical blade.'
'What, Mitchel, at it again? You are, I see, determined to try the
temper of the blade,' observed my brother.
'Oh, stop that fellow with his heroics and his _ribaldry_. When he
begins, there's no chance for me.'
'Why so cranky, Mitchel? But for you, I should not this morning have a
_rib all dry_.'
'That shows you all the more ungrateful. You won't let a fellow have a
chance.'
'Quite the contrary,' said my brother; 'it is you that won't let a
fellow have a chance. M. tried hard to get one at me this morning, but
you wouldn't let him have it.'
'Good-morning, good-morning,' said Mitchel; 'that fellow's got tongue
enough for a dozen. I'm off.'
'No, no,' said G.; 'come and breakfast with me. I can't ask the Doctor;
he has to go to his wife. How I pity him! But, poor fellow! he can't
help it now.'
'Well, don't be envious of your neighbours, G.,' returned my brother;
'it looks strongly as if you were determined to follow my good example.'
And so the trio, with jest and raillery, and in high good humour with
all the world and themselves, parted.
Great was the stir, and much was the commotion, in the little community
of Tollicherry, when it was known that my brother had been in such
imminent peril, and that his life had been saved by the gallantry and
promptitude of Lieutenant Mitchel. The story had to be told over again
and again, and the questions to be answered respecting the occurrence
could not be enumerated. At last, like every other nine days' wonder,
people began to get tired of it, and the dinner to the hero of the tale
came in its turn to occupy public attention.
On the morning before that named for the dinner, G. and my brother
encountered each other near M.'s bungalow, where my brother had just
been. The conversation that ensued referred almost entirely to G.'s
coming party. 'I've asked everyone,' said G., 'except V., who is on
circuit, and A., who is on leave, and old B., who is sick of the gout.'
'_Sick of the gout!_' returned my brother. 'I should think so. Who
wouldn't be that ever had a taste of it?'
'Come, come, Doctor; it's too early in the morning. A man should be
scrupulous about taking drams in the morning.'
'Oh, G., G., how can you?--stale, flat, and unprofitable, and
hypocritical besides, while pretending to give your friends advice. But
tell me who you have got.'
'H. will come,' replied G.; 'but from the distance at which he resides,
he stipulates that he is to go as soon as he has had coffee. The Zillah
Judge will come too, though I suspect he obtained leave with great
difficulty, as he adds, "You will not press me to stay later than
half-past nine, as we always retire to rest at 10 p.m." Then Mitchel,
our two selves, young B. and old B. (the Captain, I mean), will make up
the party.'
'Won't you have the missionary, Mr. G.?'
'No, that I won't; he'd only be a wet blanket,' said G., 'and I don't
want any wet blankets--in fact, I never liked them.'
'Poor fellow!' replied my brother. 'How I feel for him! How his bowels
will yearn when he hears of a feed that he's not to have a share of!'
'Well,' returned G., 'his bowels may yearn, then; for he won't get a
share of mine.'
'He'll be very indignant, if not spiteful,' said my brother. 'You'd
better have him; he'll talk about the tithe-offering, and quote
Leviticus to no end.'
'Well, he certainly will quote Leviticus to no end on this occasion, for
I certainly won't have him,' said G.
Young B. and Mitchel then came up, and the whole four then sauntered on
to G.'s to take early tea or coffee. While thus engaged, the
conversation again turned on guests expected. 'But do you really mean to
say,' said young Henry B., 'that H. has got leave to come? I can
scarcely credit it. My worthy cousin Harriet would scarcely permit such
a breach of discipline.' The conditions under which Mr. H. had accepted
the invitation were then made known to him; he burst into a fit of
laughter. '"Retire to rest," is it? I wonder how people can tell such
open and apparent _terra dilles_!' Then he indulged in another outbreak.
'Faix, as Paddy says, they won't break their hearts with resting, I'll
engage!' 'Come, come, Master B., you must behave yourself!' 'Behave
herself, did you say? No doubt she does--like an angel under trying
circumstances.' 'Challenge him, Mitchel, to a game at billiards--do
anything to arrest his wicked conversation,' said G. 'Remember my
respectability is at stake.' 'Oh,' said B., 'it's three to one against
you; what's it in--ponies?' 'Worse and worse!' replied G. 'First he
throws away his loose words, and now he wants to throw away his loose
cash.' 'Oh, you cave in, do you?' said B. 'Well, so be it; but now I'm
going to be serious.' His eyes were dancing with laughter, and the
internal chuckling was so overpowering that he could scarcely speak.
'I've got a little plan in my head----' 'A maggar, or anything else
that's lively,' interposed Mitchel. 'No,' replied B., 'I wouldn't
deprive you for the world; but it's this: If we all set to work
carefully, set all our watches an hour slow, and you, G., set all your
clocks to the same time, it will be our own fault if we can't persuade
H. that his watch is an hour fast.'
'Oh, that will never do!' replied G. 'Mrs. H. always sends his palankeen
for him at the time appointed, and he always goes by that, and with
that, or in that, if you prefer it.' 'That's capital,' said Henry B.;
'that will make all sure. I will go out when the man I shall set to
watch tells me that the palkee is coming, and direct the bearers to take
it to the back of the godowns, and to wait there till Mr. H. sends for
them; and then if your butler provides them a good curry and rice, and
the wherewithal to wash it down, I'll be bound they won't disturb their
master.' 'On my word,' said G., 'it looks promising! I've really half a
mind to try it. But will you, all of you, loyally support me and back
me up?' 'Of course they will,' said young B.; 'only you resolve to have
a whole mind, and not a half one, every man will be steadfast and true.'
'You may count upon one man, at least,' said Mitchel. My brother, led
away by the spirit of fun and frolic, confesses that he also promised to
be one of the conspirators, and to aid and abet as far as in him lay.
'Oh, but there's still old Captain B.!' said Mitchel. 'Never mind him,'
said G. 'I will undertake to seduce him, though I'm not a blooming young
maiden of bashful fifteen.' 'Who's wicked now, I wonder?' said Henry B.