A few minutes after the dessert had been placed on the table of the
Allee Saal, one or two people from different chairs rose and glided
away; then up got as many more, until, in about a quarter of an hour,
the whole company had quietly vanished, excepting here and there,
round the vast circumference of the table, a couple, who, not having
yet finished their phlegmatic, long-winded argument, sat like pairs of
oxen, with their heads yoked together.
It being yet only three o'clock in the day, and as people did not begin
to drink the waters again till about six, there was a long, heavy
interval, which was spent very much in the way in which English cows
pass their time when quite full of fine red clover,--bending their fore
knees, they lie down on the grass to ruminate.
As it was very hot at this hour, the ladies, in groups of two, three,
and four, with coffee before them on small square tables, sat out
together in the open air, under the shade of the trees. Most of them
commenced knitting; but, at this plethoric hour, I could not help
observing that they made several hundred times as many stitches
as remarks. A few of the young men, with cigars in their mouths,
meandered, in dandified silence, through these parties of ladies; but
almost all the German lords of the creation had hidden themselves
in holes and corners, to enjoy smoking their pipes; and surely
nothing can be more filthy--nothing can be a greater waste of time
and intellect than this horrid habit. If tobacco were even a fragrant
perfume, instead of stinking as it does, still the habit which makes
it necessary to a human being to carry a large bag in one of his
coat-pockets, and an unwieldy crooked pipe in the other, would be
unmanly; inasmuch as, besides creating an artificial want, it encumbers
him with a real burden, which, both on horseback and on foot, impedes
his activity and his progress; but when it turns out that this sad
artificial want is a nasty, vicious habit,--when it is impossible to
be clean if you indulge in it,--when it makes your hair and clothes
smell most loathsomely,--when you absolutely pollute the fresh air as
you pass through it:--when, besides all this, it corrodes the teeth,
injures the stomach, and fills with red inflammatory particles the
naturally cool, clear, white brain of man, it is quite astonishing
that these Germans, who can act so sensibly during so many hours of
the day, should not have strength of mind enough to trample their
tobacco-bags under their feet--throw their reeking, sooty pipes behind
them, and learn (I will not say from the English, but from every bird
and animal in a state of nature) to be clean; and certainly whatever
faults there may be in our manners, our cleanliness is a virtue which,
above every nation I have ever visited, pre-eminently distinguishes
us in the world. During the time which was spent in this stinking
vice, I observed that people neither interrupted each other, nor did
they very much like to be interrupted; in short, it was a sort of
siesta with the eyes open, and with smoke coming out of the mouth.
Sometimes gazing out of the window of his hof, I saw a German baron,
in a tawdry dressing-gown and scullcap (with an immense ring on his
dirty forefinger), smoking, and pretending to be thinking; sometimes I
winded a creature who, in a similar attitude, was seated on the shady
benches near the Stahl brunnen; but these were only exceptions to the
general rule, for most of the males had vanished, one knew not where,
to convert themselves into automatons which had all the smoky nuisance
of the steam-engine--without its power.
At about half-past five or six o'clock, "the world" began to come to
life again; the ladies with their knitting needles lying in their laps,
gradually began to talk to each other, some even attempting to laugh.
Group rising after group, left the small white painted tables and
empty coffee-cups round which they had been sitting, and in a short
time, the walks to the three brunnens in general, and to the Pauline in
particular, were once again thronged with people; and as slowly, and
very slowly, they walked backwards and forwards, one again saw German
society in its most amiable and delightful point of view. A few of the
ladies, particularly those who had young children, were occasionally
accompanied through the day by a nice steady, healthy-looking young
woman, whose dress (being without cap or bonnet, with a plain cloth
shawl thrown over a dark cotton gown) at once denoted that she was a
servant.
The distinction in her dress was marked in the extreme, yet it was
pleasing to see that there was no necessity to carry it farther, the
woman appearing to be so well behaved, that there was little fear of
her giving offence. Whenever her mistress stopped to talk to any of her
friends, this attendant became a harmless listener to the conversation,
and when a couple of families, seated on a bank, were amusing each
other with jokes and anecdotes, one saw by the countenances of these
quiet-looking young people, who were also permitted to sit down, that
they were enjoying the story quite as much as the rest.
In England, our fine people would of course be shocked at the idea
of thus associating with, or rather sitting in society with their
servants, and on account of the manners of our servants, it certainly
would not be agreeable; however, if we had but one code, instead of
having one hundred and fifty thousand (for I quite forgot to insert
in my long list the manners of a fashionable lady's maid), this would
not be the case; for then English servants, like German servants,
would learn to sit in the presence of their superiors without giving
any offence at all. But besides observing how harmlessly these German
menials conducted themselves, I must own I could not help reflecting
what an advantage it was, not only to them, but to the humble hovel
to which, when they married, they would probably return--in short, to
society, that they should thus have had an opportunity of witnessing
the conduct, and of listening to the conversation of quiet, sensible,
moral people, who had had the advantages of a good education.
Of course, if these young people were placed on high wages--tricked
out with all the cast-off finery of their mistresses--and if laden
with these elements of corruption, and hopelessly banished from the
presence of their superiors, they were day after day, and night after
night, to be stewed up together with stewards, butlers, &c., in the
devil's frying-pan--I mean, that den of narrow-minded iniquity, a
housekeeper's room--of course, these strong, bony, useful servants
would very soon dress as finely, and give themselves all those airs for
which an English lady's maid is so celebrated even in her own country;
but, in Germany, good sense and poverty have as yet firmly and rigidly
prescribed, not only the dress which is to distinguish servants from
their masters, but that, with every rational indulgence, with every
liberal opportunity of raising themselves in their own estimation, they
shall be fed and treated in a manner and according to a scale, which,
though superior, still bears a due relation to the humble station
and habits in which they were born and bred. Of course, servants
trained in this manner cost very little, yet if they are not naturally
ill-disposed, there is every thing to encourage them in good behaviour,
with very little to lead them astray. They are certainly not, like our
servants, clothed in satin, fine linen, and superfine cloth; nor like
Dives himself, do they fare sumptuously every day, but I believe they
are all the happier, and infinitely more at their ease, for being kept
to their natural station in life, instead of being permitted to ape an
appearance for which their education has not fitted them, or repeat
fine slip-slop sentiments which they do not understand.
However, it is not our servants who deserve to be blamed; they are
quite right to receive high wages, wear veils, kid gloves, superfine
cloth, give themselves airs, mock the manners of their lords and
ladies, and to farcify below stairs the "Comedy of Errors," which
they catch an occasional glimpse of above; in short, to do as little,
consume as much, and be as expensive and troublesome as possible. No
liberal person can blame _them_, but it is, I fear, on _our_ heads
that all their follies must rest; we have no one but ourselves to
blame, and until a few of the principal families in England, for the
credit and welfare of the country, agree together to lower the style
and habits of their servants, and by a long pull, a strong pull, and
a pull all together, to break the horrid system which at present
prevails,--the distinction between the honest ploughman, who whistles
along the fallow, and his white-faced, powder-headed, silver-laced,
scarlet-breached, golden-gartered brother in London, must be as
strikingly ridiculous as ever: the one must remain an honour, the other
a discredit, to the wealth of a country which (we all say unjustly)
has been called by its enemy a "nation of shopkeepers."
If once the system were to be blown up, thousands of honest,
well-meaning servants would, I believe, rejoice; and while the
aristocracy and wealthier classes would in fact be served at least as
well as ever, the middle ranks, and especially all people of small
incomes, would be relieved beyond description from an unnatural and
unnecessary burden which but too often embitters all their little
domestic arrangements. There can be no points of contrast between
Germany and England more remarkable than that, in the one country,
people of all incomes are supported and relieved in proportion to the
number of their servants, while in the other they are tormented and
oppressed. Again, that in the one country, servants humbly dressed,
and humbly fed, live in a sort of exalted and honourable intercourse
with their masters; while, in the other, servants highly powdered, and
grossly fed, are treated _de haut en bas_, in a manner which is not to
be seen on the Continent.
The enormous wealth of England is the commercial wonder of the world,
yet every reflecting man who looks at our debt, at the immense fortunes
of individuals, and at the levelling, unprincipled, radical spirit of
the age, must see that there exist among us elements which may possibly
some day or other furiously appear in collision. The great country may
yet live to see distress; and in the storm, our commercial integrity,
like an over weighted vessel, may, for aught we know, founder and go
down, stern foremost. I therefore most earnestly say, should this
calamity ever befall us, let not foreigners be entitled, in preaching
over our graves, to pronounce, "that we were a people who did not know
how to enjoy prosperity--that our money, like our blood, flew to our
heads--that our riches corrupted our minds--and that it was absolutely
our enormous wealth which sunk us."
Without saying one other word, I will only again ask, is it or is it
not the interest of our upper classes to countenance this island system?
Should it be argued, that they ought not to be blamed because vulgar,
narrow-minded people are foolish enough to ruin themselves in a vain
attempt to copy them, I reply, that they must take human nature, good
and bad, not as it ought to be, but as it is; and that, after all,
it is no compliment to the high station they hold, that the middle
and lower classes will absolutely ruin themselves in overfeeding and
overdressing their servants--in short, in following any bad example
which such high authority may irrationally decree to be fashionable.
But to return to the Promenade.
From everlastingly vibrating backwards and forwards on this walk, one
gets so well acquainted with the faces of one's comrades, that it is
easy to note the arrival of any stranger, who, however, after having
made two or three turns, is considered as received into, and belonging
to, the ambulatory community.
In constantly passing the people on the promenade, one occasionally
heard a party talking French. During the military dominion of Napoleon,
that language, of course, flooded the whole of the high duchy of Nassau
as completely as almost the rest of Europe: a strong ebb or re-action,
however, has of late years taken place, and in Prussia, for instance,
the common people do not like even to hear the language pronounced.
On the other hand, thanks to Sir Walter Scott, Lord Byron, and other
worn-out literary labourers, now resting in their graves, our language
is beginning to make an honest progress; and even in France it is
becoming fashionable to display in literary society a flower or two
culled from that North border, the Jardin Anglais.
As a passing stranger, the word I heard pronounced on the promenade the
oftenest was "Ja! Ja!" and it really seemed to me that German women to
all questions invariably answer in the affirmative, for "Ja! Ja!" was
repeated by them, I know, from morning till night, and, for aught I
know, from night till morning.
As almost every stranger at Langen-Schwalbach, as well as several
of its inhabitants, were at this hour on the promenade, the three
brunnens were often surrounded by more open mouths than the women in
attendance could supply. The old mother at the Pauline was therefore
always assisted in the evening by her daughter, who, without being at
all handsome, was, like her parent, a picture of robust, ruddy health;
and to poor withered people, who came to them to drink, it was very
satisfactory indeed to see the practical effect which swallowing and
baling out this water from morning till night had had on these two
females; and as they stood in the burning sun bending downwards into
the brunnen, to fill the glasses which in all directions converged
towards them, it was curious to observe the different descriptions of
people who from every point of Europe (except England) had surrounded
one little well. As I earnestly looked at their various figures and
faces, I could not help feeling that it was quite impossible for the
goddess Pauline to cure them all: for I saw a tall, gaunt, brown,
hard-featured, lantern-jawed officer, _à demi-solde_, the sort of
fellow that the French call "_un gros maigre_," drinking by the side
of a red-faced, stuffy, stumpy, stunted little man, who seemed made on
purpose to demonstrate that the human figure, like the telescope, could
be made portable.--What in the whole world (I mumbled to myself) can
be the matter with that very nice, fresh, comfortable, healthy-looking
widow? Or what does that huge, unwieldy man in the broad-brimmed hat
require from the Pauline?--Surely he is already about as full as he can
hold? And that poor sick girl, who has just borrowed the glass from her
withered, wrinkled, skinny, little aunt? Can the same prescription be
good for them both? A couple of nicely-dressed children are extending
their little glasses to drink the water with milk; and see! that gang
of countrymen, who have stopped their carts on the upper road, are
racing and chasing each other down the bank to crowd round the brunnen!
Is it not curious to observe that in such a state of perspiration they
can drink such deadly cold water with impunity? But this really is the
case; and whether it is burning hot, or raining a deluge, this simple
medicine is always agreeable, and no sooner is it swallowed, than, like
the fire in the grate, it begins to warm its new mansion.
Such was the scene, and such was the effect, daily witnessed round one
of nature's simplest and most beneficent remedies. All the drinkers
seemed to be satisfied with the water, which, I believe, has only one
virtue, that of strengthening the stomach; yet it is this solitary
quality which has made it cure almost every possible disorder of body
and mind: for though people with an ankle resting on a knee sometimes
mysteriously point to their toes, and sometimes as solemnly lay their
hands upon their foreheads, yet I rather believe that almost every
malady to which the human frame is subject is either by highways
or byways connected with the stomach; and I must own I never see a
fashionable physician mysteriously counting the pulse of a plethoric
patient, or, with a silver spoon on his tongue, importantly looking
down his red, inflamed gullet (so properly termed by Johnson "the
meat-pipe"), but I feel a desire to exclaim, "Why not tell the poor
gentleman at once--Sir! you've eaten too much, you've drunk too
much, and you've not taken exercise enough!" That these are the main
causes of almost every one's illness, there can be no greater proof,
than that those savage nations which live actively and temperately
have only one great disorder--death. The human frame was not created
imperfect--it is we ourselves who have made it so; there exists no
donkey in creation so overladen as our stomachs, and it is because they
groan under the weight so cruelly imposed upon them, that we see people
driving them before them in herds to drink at one little brunnen.
A list of the strangers visiting Bad-Ems, Langen-Schwalbach, and
Schlangenbad, is published twice a week, and circulated on all the
promenades. From it, I find that there are 1200 visiters at Schwalbach
alone--an immense number for so small a place. Still, the habits of
the people are so quiet, that it does not at all bear the appearance
of an English watering-place, and certainly I never before existed in
a society where people are left so completely to go their own ways.
Whether I stroll up and down the promenade or about the town, whether I
mount the hill or ramble into distant villages, no one seems to notice
me any more than if I had been born there; and yet out of the 1200
strangers, I happen to be the only specimen to be seen of Old England.
No one knows that I have given up feasting in public, for it is not the
custom to dine always at the same house; but when one o'clock comes,
people go to the Allee Saal, Goldene Kette, &c. just as they feel
disposed at the moment.
There are no horses to be hired at Schwalbach, but a profusion of
donkeys and mules. It is a pretty, gaudy sight to witness a group
of these animals carrying ladies in their parti-coloured bonnets,
&c. descending one of the hills. The saddles are covered with coarse
scarlet, or bright blue cloth, and the donkey always wears a fine red
brow-band; nevertheless, under these brilliant colours, to the eye of
a cognoscente, it is too easy to perceive that the poor creatures are
sick in their hearts of their finery, and that they are tired, almost
unto death, of carrying one large curious lady after another to see
Hohenstein, Adolfseck, and other lions, which without metaphor are
actually consuming the carcasses of these unhappy asses. The other day
I myself hired one, but not being allowed to have the animal alone, I
was obliged to submit to be followed by the owner, who, by order of the
Duke, was dressed in a blue smockfrock, girded by a buff belt.
I found that I could not produce the slightest effect on the animal's
pace, but that if the man behind me only shook his stick, down went
the creature's long ears, and on we trotted. By this arrangement, I
was hurried by objects which I wished to look at, and obliged to crawl
before what I was exceedingly anxious to leave behind; and altogether
it was travelling so very much like a bag of sand, that ever since I
have much preferred propelling myself.