Send me some money. I have none and seem to have nowhere to borrow. By my
reckoning I cannot under favourable circumstances get more than a thousand
roubles from you before September. But don’t send the money by post, as I
can’t bear going to post offices....
March 5.
We are going!!! I agree to go, where you like and when you like. My soul is
leaping with delight. It would be stupid on my part not to go, for when
would an opportunity come again? But, my dear friend, I leave you to weigh
the following circumstances.
(1) My work is still far from being finished; if I put it by till May, I
shall not be able to begin my Sahalin work before July, and that is risky.
For my Sahalin impressions are already evaporating, and I run the risk of
forgetting a great deal.
(2) I have absolutely no money. If without finishing my novel I take
another thousand roubles for the tour abroad, and then for living after the
tour, I shall get into such a tangle that the devil himself could not pull
me out by the ears. I am not in a tangle yet because I am up to all sorts
of dodges, and live more frugally than a mouse; but if I go abroad
everything will go to the devil. My accounts will be in a mess and I shall
get myself hopelessly in debt. The very thought of a debt of two thousand
makes my heart sink.
There are other considerations, but they are all of small account beside
that of money and work. And so, thoroughly digest my objections, put
yourself into my skin for a moment, and decide, wouldn’t it be better for
me to stay at home? You will say all this is unimportant. But lay aside
your point of view? and look at it from mine.