CHAPTER XXIX.

FIRST "NATIONAL" POULTRY-SHOW IN NEW YORK.

Whether it was because Barnum had taken this enterprise in hand, whether

it was because it was known that my "superior" stock was to be seen at

the Museum, or whether it was because the intrepid "Fanny Fern" had

promised to visit the show, I cannot say; but one thing was

certain,--such a gathering of "the people" was seldom witnessed, even in

busy, driving, sight-seeing New York, as that which crowded the great

rooms of Barnum's establishment on the occasion of the first exhibition

of the so-called "National Poultry Society."

"All the world" was there, with his wife and babies, and nieces and

nephews. The belle and the beau, the merchant and the mechanic, the

lawyer and the parson, the rich and the poor, old and young, grave and

gay,--all were in attendance upon this extraordinary display of

cockadoodledom; and Barnum--the indefatigable, the enterprising, the

determined, the incomparable Barnum--was in his glory, as the quarters

were piled up at the counter of the ticket-office, and "the people"

wedged their way up the crowded stairs and aisles of his Museum.

The great show-man was as busy as His Satanic Majesty is vulgarly

supposed to be in a snow-storm! Now here, now there; up stairs, down

stairs; in the halls, in the lobbies; busy with John, button-holing the

"committees," from morning till night. All smiles, all good-nature, all

exertion to please the throngs of visitors who constantly jammed their

way about the building. And, to say that everything about this

undertaking (so far as he was personally concerned) was not managed with

tact and good judgment, as well as complete propriety and liberality,

would be to state what was untrue. Mr. Barnum rarely does anything by

halves; and to him, in this instance, belongs the credit of getting up,

and carrying through successfully, the very best show of poultry ever

seen in America,--beyond all comparison.

In due season I selected from my then somewhat reduced stock sixty

specimens of the Shanghae tribe of fowls, which, with some twenty

samples of choice Madagascar Rabbits, I forwarded (in charge of my own

agent) to this long-talked-of show.

The person whom I employed to look after my stock--(for I had long since

got to be "a gentleman," and couldn't attend to such trifling matters,

personally)--the man who went with it to this exhibition was thoroughly

posted up in his "profession," and knew a hawk from a handsaw, as well

as a Shanghae from a Cochin-China. And when he started for New York with

my contributions, I enjoined it upon him to bear in mind, under _all_

circumstances, that the gentleman he represented had the only

_pure_-bred poultry in America, any way. To which he replied, briefly,

"Is _that_ all? I knew that before."

I said, "John, you're a brick. A faced-brick. A _hard_-faced-brick.

You'll _do_."

John winked, and left me, with the understanding that, as soon as he

should have time to look around the show, he would telegraph me at

Boston what the prospect was, comparatively. I felt quite _sure_ that my

fowls would take all the premiums, for they always had done so before;

and my "pure-bred" stock grew better and better every year!

I did not go to the show for a day or two after my agent left; and, on

the morning succeeding the opening, I received from him the following

brief but expressive telegraphic dispatch:

"G.P. BURNHAM, BOSTON.

"Arrived safe; thought we'd got 'em, _sure_. We have--_over the

left_. You are nowhar!

"B."

Here was a precious fix, to be sure! For five years, I had carried away

the palm at every exhibition where my "splendid" and deservedly

"unrivalled" samples had been put in competition with the stock of

others. And now, at the first great _national_ exhibition, where

everybody would of course be present (and where the first cages that

would be looked for, or looked into, must be those of Mr. Burnham, the

breeder of the only original "pure"-blooded poultry in the country),

according to my agent's dispatch I was _no_whar!

This dispatch reached me at noon, and on the following morning I was in

New York. I looked about the several apartments in the Museum, and

satisfied myself who had the best fowls there, very quickly. As it

happened, they were not inside of _my_ cages, by a long mark!

Yet "the people" crowded around my showy coops, for which my agent had

secured an advantageous position, and in displaying them (if I remember

aright) he lost no opportunity in saying just _enough_ (and no more) to

the throng who passed and admired their beautiful proportions, their

great size, and splendid colors. There were not a few choice birds

scattered about the rooms,--under the benches, or in the far-off

corners,--which my eye fell upon, which my agent subsequently purchased

at very modest prices, and which found their way, somehow, into my

coops.

"The people" now stared with more earnestness than ever. By the evening

of the second day, my "pure-bred" stock _did_ look remarkably well! And

when the "committee" came round, at last, I found myself the recipient

of several of the leading premiums, for my "magnificent," "superb" and

"extraordinary" contributions, again. And now commenced the fun, once

more, in earnest.

Everything that I sent to New York was quickly bought up at enormous

prices. Fifty, eighty, a hundred, a hundred and twenty-five dollars per

trio, was willingly paid my agent for the rare and incomparable fowls I

exhibited there. "The people" were literally mad on the subject; and I

hadn't half enough to supply my customers with, at figures that

astonished even _my_ ideas of prices,--which, by the way, were not

easily disturbed!

During this exhibition, Mr. Barnum announced that a "conversational"

gathering would be held, one day, in the lecture-room of his Museum;

whither the throng were invited to repair, at last, to talk over matters

pertaining to the welfare of the trade generally, and the hen-humbug

more particularly.

A rush was directly made for this hall, which was quickly filled up by

the multitude, who now stood or sat, with gaping mouths and staring

eyes, in readiness to be further bamboozled by the managers of this

_National_ "Society," who duly paraded themselves upon the platform, and

commenced to show themselves up for the edification of the uninitiated,

and to the great amusement of those who had "been there" before them.

Mr. Barnum presided, but with that grace and modesty and extreme

diffidence for which he is so noted. The enthusiasm of the occasion soon

reached concert-pitch, however, and everybody on the stage, in the

parquette, and around the gallery, desired to relieve themselves of the

pent-up patriotism that rioted in their bosoms; and all desired to be

heard at the same time.

Cries of "Barnum! Barnum!" "Where's Bennett?" "Speech from Burnham!"

"Down in front!" "Give 'em a chance!" "Hear the president!--there he

is!" "Hurra for the Bother'ems!" &c. &c., rang from the lungs of the

crowd. And finally order was restored, and Mr. Barnum approached the

front of the stage, to deliver himself of "feelings that could be

fancied, not described," amid the cheers and shouts of that crazy

multitude.

The History of the Hen Fever. A Humorous Record · 第 29 / 47 章