Chapter VI. The Awakening.

The nobler nature within him stirred

To life, at that woman's deed and word.

-- Whittier.

Deeper emotions than he had felt before in all his life of shallow

aimlessness stirred Harry Glen's bosom as he turned away from the

door which Rachel Bond closed behind her with a decisive promptness

that chorded well with her resolute composure during the interview.

This blow fell much more heavily than any that had preceded

it, because it descended from the towering height to which he had

raised his expectations of an ardent greeting from a loving girl,

eagerly watching for his return.

As was to be expected from one of his nature, he forgot entirely

his ruminations upon the advisability of discarding her, and the

difficulty he experienced in devising a plan whereby this could

be done easily and gracefully. He only thought of himself as the

blameless victim of a woman's fickleness. The bitter things he

had read and heard of the sex's inconstancy rose in his mind, as

acrid bile sometimes ascends in one's throat.

“Here,” he said to himself, “is an instance of feminine perfidy

equal to anything that Byron ever sneered at. This girl, who was

so proud to receive my attentions a little while ago, and who so

gladly accepted me for her promised husband, now turns away at the

slightest cloud of disapproval falling upon me. And to think, too,

how I have given her all my heart, and lavished upon her a love as

deep and true as ever a man gave a woman.”

He was sure that he had been so badly used as to have sufficient

grounds for turning misanthrope and woman-hater. Thin natures are

like light wines and weak syrups in the readiness with which they

sour.

The moon had risen as it did on that eventful betrothal-night.

Again the stars had sunk from sight in the sea of silver splendor

rolling from the round, full orb. Again the roadway down the hill

lay like a web of fine linen, bleaching upon an emerald meadow.

Again the clear waters of the Miami rippled in softly merry music

over the white limestone of their shallow bed. Again the river,

winding through the pleasant valley, framed in gently rising

hill-sides, appeared as great silver ribbon, decorating a mass

of heavily-embroidered green velvet. Again Sardis lay at the foot

of the hills, its coarse and common place outlines softened into

glorious symmetry by the moonlight's wondrous witchery.

He stopped for a moment and glanced at the old apple-tree, under

which they had stood when

“Their spirits rushed together at the meeting of their lips.”

But its raiment of odorous blossoms was gone. Instead, it bore a

load of shapeless, sour, unripened fruit. Instead of the freshling

springing grass, at its foot was now a coarse stubble. Instead of

the delicately sweet breath of violets and fruit blooms scenting

the evening air came the heavy, persistent perfume of tuberoses,

and the mawkish scent of gaudy poppies.

“Bah, it smells like a funeral,” he said, and he turned away and

walked slowly down the hill. “And it is one. My heart and all my

hopes lie buried at the foot of that old apple-tree.”

It had been suggested that much of the sympathy we lavish upon

martyrs is wanton waste, because to many minds, if not in fact to

all, there is a positive pleasure in considering oneself a martyr.

More absolute truth is contained in this than appears at the first

blush. There are very few who do not roll under their tongues as

a sweet morsel the belief that their superior goodness or generosity

has brought them trouble and affliction from envious and wicked

inferiors.

So the honey that mingled with the gall and hysop of Harry Glen's

humiliation was the martyr feeling that his holiest affections

had been ruthlessly trampled upon by a cold-hearted woman. His

desultory readings of Byron furnished his imagination with all

the woful suits and trappings necessary to trick himself out as a

melancholy hero.

On his way home he had to pass the principal hotel in the place,

the front of which on Summer evenings was the Sardis forum for the

discussion of national politics and local gossip. As he approached

quietly along the grassy walk he overheard his own name used. He

stepped back into the shadow of a large maple and listened:

“Yes, I seen him as he got off the train,” said Nels Hathaway,

big, fat, lazy, and the most inveterate male gossip in the village.

“And he is looking mighty well--yes, MIGHTY well. I said to Tom

Botkins, here, 'what a wonderful consitution Harry Glen has, to be

sure, to stand the hardships of the field so well.'”

The sarcasm was so evident that Harry's blood seethed. The Tim

Botkins alluded to had been dubbed by Basil Wurmset, the cynic and

wit of the village, “apt appreciation's artful aid.” Red-haired,

soft eyed, moon-faced, round of belly and lymphatic of temperament,

his principal occupation in life was to play fiddle in the Sardis

string-band, and in the intervals of professional engagements at

dances and picnics, to fill one of the large splint-bottomed chairs

in front of the hotel with his pulpy form, and receive the smart

or bitter sayings of the loungers there with a laught that began

before any one else's, and lasted after the others had gotten

through. His laugh alone was as good as that of all the rest of

the crowd. It was not a hearty, resonant laugh, like that from

the mouth of a strong-lunged, wholesome-natured man, which has the

mellow roundness of a solo on a French horn. It was a slovenly,

greasy, convictionless laugh, with uncertain tones and ill-defined

edges. Its effect was due to its volume, readiness, and long

continuance. Swelling up of the puffy form, and reddening ripples

of the broad face heralded it, it began with a contagious cackle,

it deepened into a flabby guffaw, and after all the others roundabout

had finished their cachinnatory tribute it wound up with what was

between a roar and the lazy drone of a bagpipe.

It now rewarded Nels Hathaway's irony, and the rest of the loungers

joined in. Encouraged, Nels continued, as its last echoes died

away:

“Yes, he's just as spry and pert as anybody. He seems to have

recovered entirely from all his wounds; none of 'em have disfiggered

him any, and his nerves have got over their terrible strain.”

Tim ran promptly through all the notes in his diapason, and the

rest joined in on the middle register.

“Well, I'm not at all surprised,” said Mr. Oldunker, a bitter

States' Rights Democrat, and the oracle of his party. “I told you

how it'd be from the first. Harry Glen was one of them Wide-Awakes

that marched around on pleasant evenings last Fall with oil-cloth

capes and kerosene lamps. I told you that those fellows'd be no

where when the war they were trying to bring on came. I'm not at

all astonished that he showed himself lily-livered when he found

the people that he was willing to rob of their property standing

ready to fight for their homes and their slaves.”

“Ready to shoot into a crowd of unsuspecting men, you mean,” sneered

Basil Wurmset, “and then break their own cursed necks when they

saw a little cold steel coming their way.”

Tim came in promptly with his risible symphony.

“Well, they didn't run away from any cold steel that Harry Glen

displayed,” sneered Oldunker.

Tim's laugh was allegro and crescendo at the first, and staccato

at the close.

“You seem to forget that Capt. Bob Bennett was a Wide-Awake, too,”

retorted Wurmset, “though you might have remembered it from his

having threatened to lick you for encouraging the boys to stone

the lamps in the procession.”

Tim cackled, gurgled and roared.

Nels Hathaway had kept silent as long as he could. He must put

his oar into the conversational tide.

“I'd give six bits,” he said, “to know how the meeting between him

and Rachel Bond passes off. He's gone up to the house. The boys

seen him, all dressed up his best. But his finery and his perfumed

hankerchiefs won't count anything with her, I can tell YOU. She

comes of fighting stock, if ever a woman did. The Bonds and

Harringtons--her mother's people--are game breeds, both of 'em,

and stand right on their record, every time. She'll have precious

little traffic with a white-feathered fellow. I think she's been

preparing for him the coldest shoulder any young feller in Sardis's

got for many a long day.”

There was nothing very funny in this speech, but a good deal of

risible matter had accumulated in Tim's diaphragm during its delivery

which he had to get rid of, and he did.

Harry had heard enough. While Tim's laugh yet resounded he walked

away unnoticed, and taking a roundabout course gained his room.

There he remained a week, hardly coming down to his meals. It

was a terrible week for him, for every waking hour of it he walked

through the valley of humiliation, and drank the bitter waters of

shame. The joints of his hitherto impenetrable armor of self-conceit

had been so pierced by the fine rapier thrusts of Rachel's scorn

that it fell from him under the coarse pounding of the village

loungers and left him naked and defenseless to their blows. Every

nerve and sense ached with acute pain. He now felt all of his

father's humiliation, all his mother's querulous sorrow, all his

betrothed's anguish and abasement.

Thoughts of suicide, and of flying to some part of the country

where he was entirely unknown, crowded upon him incessantly. But

with that perversity that nature seemingly delights in, there had

arisen in his heart since he had lost her, such a love for Rachel

Bond as made life without her, or without her esteem even, seem

valueless. To go into a strange part of the country and begin

life anew would be to give her up forever, and this he could not

do. It would be much preferable to die demonstrating that he was

in some degree worthy of her. And a latent manly pride awakened and

came to his assistance. He could not be the son of his proud,

iron-willed father without some transmission of that sire's

courageous qualities. He formed his resolution: He would stay in

Sardis, and recover his honor where he had lost it.

At the end of the week he heard the drums beat, the cannon fire,

and the people cheer. The company had come home, and was marching

proudly down the street to a welcome as enthusiastic as if its members

were bronzed veterans returning victoriously from a campaign that

had lasted for years.

His mother told him the next day that the company had decided to

re-enlist for three years or duration of the war, and that a meeting

would be held that evening to carry the intention into execution.

When the evening came Harry walked into the town hall, dressed as

carefully as he had prepared himself for his visit with Rachel.

He found the whole company assembled there, the members smoking,

chatting with their friends, and recounting to admiring hearers

the wonderful experiences they had gone through. The enlistment

papers were being prepared, and some of the boys who had not been

examined during the day were undergoing the surgeon's inspection

in an adjoining room.

Harry was coldly received by everybody, and winced a little under

this contrast with the attentions that all the others were given.

At last all the papers and rolls seemed to be signed, and there

was a lull in the proceedings. Harry rose from his seat, as if to

address the meeting. Instantly all was silence and attention.

“Comrades,” he said, in a firm, even voice, “I have come to say to

you that I feel that I made a mistake during our term of service,

and I want to apologize to you for my conduct then. More than

this, I want to redeem myself. I want to go with you again, and

have another chance to---”

He was interrupted by an enthusiastic shout from them all.

“Hurrah! Bully for Lieutenant Glen! Of couse we'll give you

another show. Come right along in your old place, and welcome.”

There was but one dissenting voice. It was that of Jake Alspaugh:

“No, I'll be durned if we want ye along any more. We've no place

for sich fellers with us. We only want them as has sand in their

craws.”

But the protest was overslaughed by the multitude of assents. At

the first interval of silence Harry said:

“No, comrades, I'll not accept a commission again until I'm sure I

can do it credit. I'll enlist in the company on the same footing

as the rest of the boys, and share everything with you. Give the

lieutenancy to our gallant comrade Alspaugh, who has richly earned

it.”

The suggestion was accepted with more enthusiastic cheering,

and Harry, going up to the desk, filled out an enlistment blank,

signed it and the company roll, and retired with the surgeon for

the physical examination. This finished, he slipped out unnoticed

and went to his home. On his way thither he saw Rachel as she passed

a brilliantly lighted show-window. She was in traveling costume,

and seemed to be going to the depot. She turned her head slightly

and bowed a formal recognition.

As their eyes met he saw enough to make him believe that what he

had done met her approval.

The Red Acorn · 第 6 / 19 章