The following items, culled from recent issues of _The Daily Lure_, show
where you should go to find really interesting, stimulating and flat-
catching notices:--
Partner, with not less than five thousand pounds, wanted for a wild-duck
farm in the island of Mull. Must be a man of iron constitution; Gaelic
speaker and teetotaler preferred.
* * *
Wanted, a cheap Desert Island, with a good water-supply and home comforts,
by a Georgian poet weary of the racket of Hammersmith.
* * *
Complete suits of armour, guaranteed bottle-proof, ten guineas each,
suitable for elderly pedestrians in charabanc areas.
* * *
Madame Bogolubov, Crystal-gazer in ordinary to the ex-King CONSTANTINE, is
prepared for a small fee to advise intending explorers, prospectors or
treasure-seekers as to suitable spots for excavation, oil-boring, etc.
* * *
Disused Martello Tower on the Irish coast, fifty miles from a police
barrack, offered cheap as an appropriate basis of observation to psychic
enthusiasts anxious to study the ways of leprechauns, banshees, etc.
* * *
Genuine portraits by VAN DYCK, VELASQUEZ and REMBRANDT must be sold
immediately to pay a debt of honour. Price thirty shillings each, or would
take part payment in pre-war whisky.
* * *
Semi-paralysed Yugo-Slav professor, speaking seventeen languages, will give
lessons to neo-plutocrats in the correct pronunciation of the names of all
the foreign singers, dancers and artists performing or exhibiting in
London.
* * *
Persons interested in edible fungi may be glad to take shares in a fungus
plantation about to be started in the neighbourhood of Toller Porcorum,
Dorchester.
* * * * *