this ship. But, being still of a roving disposition, and desirous of
seeing as many different parts of the world as I could, I shipped
myself soon after, in the same year, as steward on board of a fine
large ship, called the Jamaica, Captain David Watt; and we sailed from
England in December 1771 for Nevis and Jamaica. I found Jamaica to be
a very fine large island, well peopled, and the most considerable of
the West India islands. There was a vast number of negroes here, whom
I found as usual exceedingly imposed upon by the white people, and the
slaves punished as in the other islands. There are negroes whose
business it is to flog slaves; they go about to different people for
employment, and the usual pay is from one to four bits. I saw many
cruel punishments inflicted on the slaves in the short time I stayed
here. In particular I was present when a poor fellow was tied up and
kept hanging by the wrists at some distance from the ground, and then
some half hundred weights were fixed to his ancles, in which posture
he was flogged most unmercifully. There were also, as I heard, two
different masters noted for cruelty on the island, who had staked up
two negroes naked, and in two hours the vermin stung them to death. I
heard a gentleman I well knew tell my captain that he passed sentence
on a negro man to be burnt alive for attempting to poison an overseer.
I pass over numerous other instances, in order to relieve the reader
by a milder scene of roguery. Before I had been long on the island,
one Mr. Smith at Port Morant bought goods of me to the amount of
twenty-five pounds sterling; but when I demanded payment from him, he
was going each time to beat me, and threatened that he would put me in
goal. One time he would say I was going to set his house on fire, at
another he would swear I was going to run away with his slaves. I was
astonished at this usage from a person who was in the situation of a
gentleman, but I had no alternative; I was therefore obliged to
submit. When I came to Kingston, I was surprised to see the number of
Africans who were assembled together on Sundays; particularly at a
large commodious place, called Spring Path. Here each different nation
of Africa meet and dance after the manner of their own country. They
still retain most of their native customs: they bury their dead, and
put victuals, pipes and tobacco, and other things, in the grave with
the corps, in the same manner as in Africa. Our ship having got her
loading we sailed for London, where we arrived in the August
following. On my return to London, I waited on my old and good master,
Dr. Irving, who made me an offer of his service again. Being now tired
of the sea I gladly accepted it. I was very happy in living with this
gentleman once more; during which time we were daily employed in
reducing old Neptune's dominions by purifying the briny element and
making it fresh. Thus I went on till May 1773, when I was roused by
the sound of fame, to seek new adventures, and to find, towards the
north pole, what our Creator never intended we should, a passage to
India. An expedition was now fitting out to explore a north-east
passage, conducted by the Honourable John Constantine Phipps, since
Lord Mulgrave, in his Majesty's sloop of war the Race Horse. My master
being anxious for the reputation of this adventure, we therefore
prepared every thing for our voyage, and I attended him on board the
Race Horse, the 24th day of May 1773. We proceeded to Sheerness, where
we were joined by his Majesty's sloop the Carcass, commanded by
Captain Lutwidge. On the 4th of June we sailed towards our destined
place, the pole; and on the 15th of the same month we were off
Shetland. On this day I had a great and unexpected deliverance from an
accident which was near blowing up the ship and destroying the crew,
which made me ever after during the voyage uncommonly cautious. The
ship was so filled that there was very little room on board for any
one, which placed me in a very aukward situation. I had resolved to
keep a journal of this singular and interesting voyage; and I had no
other place for this purpose but a little cabin, or the doctor's
store-room, where I slept. This little place was stuffed with all
manner of combustibles, particularly with tow and aquafortis, and many
other dangerous things. Unfortunately it happened in the evening as I
was writing my journal, that I had occasion to take the candle out of
the lanthorn, and a spark having touched a single thread of the tow,
all the rest caught the flame, and immediately the whole was in a
blaze. I saw nothing but present death before me, and expected to be
the first to perish in the flames. In a moment the alarm was spread,
and many people who were near ran to assist in putting out the fire.
All this time I was in the very midst of the flames; my shirt, and the
handkerchief on my neck, were burnt, and I was almost smothered with
the smoke. However, through God's mercy, as I was nearly giving up all
hopes, some people brought blankets and mattresses and threw them on
the flames, by which means in a short time the fire was put out. I was
severely reprimanded and menaced by such of the officers who knew it,
and strictly charged never more to go there with a light: and, indeed,
even my own fears made me give heed to this command for a little time;
but at last, not being able to write my journal in any other part of
the ship, I was tempted again to venture by stealth with a light in
the same cabin, though not without considerable fear and dread on my
mind. On the 20th of June we began to use Dr. Irving's apparatus for
making salt water fresh; I used to attend the distillery: I frequently
purified from twenty-six to forty gallons a day. The water thus
distilled was perfectly pure, well tasted, and free from salt; and was
used on various occasions on board the ship. On the 28th of June,
being in lat. 78, we made Greenland, where I was surprised to see the
sun did not set. The weather now became extremely cold; and as we
sailed between north and east, which was our course, we saw many very
high and curious mountains of ice; and also a great number of very
large whales, which used to come close to our ship, and blow the water
up to a very great height in the air. One morning we had vast
quantities of sea-horses about the ship, which neighed exactly like
any other horses. We fired some harpoon guns amongst them, in order to
take some, but we could not get any. The 30th, the captain of a
Greenland ship came on board, and told us of three ships that were
lost in the ice; however we still held on our course till July the
11th, when we were stopt by one compact impenetrable body of ice. We
ran along it from east to west above ten degrees; and on the 27th we
got as far north as 80, 37; and in 19 or 20 degrees east longitude
from London. On the 29th and 30th of July we saw one continued plain
of smooth unbroken ice, bounded only by the horizon; and we fastened
to a piece of ice that was eight yards eleven inches thick. We had
generally sunshine, and constant daylight; which gave cheerfulness and
novelty to the whole of this striking, grand, and uncommon scene; and,
to heighten it still more, the reflection of the sun from the ice gave
the clouds a most beautiful appearance. We killed many different
animals at this time, and among the rest nine bears. Though they had
nothing in their paunches but water yet they were all very fat. We
used to decoy them to the ship sometimes by burning feathers or skins.
I thought them coarse eating, but some of the ship's company relished
them very much. Some of our people once, in the boat, fired at and
wounded a sea-horse, which dived immediately; and, in a little time
after, brought up with it a number of others. They all joined in an
attack upon the boat, and were with difficulty prevented from staving
or oversetting her; but a boat from the Carcass having come to assist
ours, and joined it, they dispersed, after having wrested an oar from
one of the men. One of the ship's boats had before been attacked in
the same manner, but happily no harm was done. Though we wounded
several of these animals we never got but one. We remained hereabouts
until the 1st of August; when the two ships got completely fastened in
the ice, occasioned by the loose ice that set in from the sea. This
made our situation very dreadful and alarming; so that on the 7th day
we were in very great apprehension of having the ships squeezed to
pieces. The officers now held a council to know what was best for us
to do in order to save our lives; and it was determined that we should
endeavour to escape by dragging our boats along the ice towards the
sea; which, however, was farther off than any of us thought. This
determination filled us with extreme dejection, and confounded us with
despair; for we had very little prospect of escaping with life.
However, we sawed some of the ice about the ships to keep it from
hurting them; and thus kept them in a kind of pond. We then began to
drag the boats as well as we could towards the sea; but, after two or
three days labour, we made very little progress; so that some of our
hearts totally failed us, and I really began to give up myself for
lost, when I saw our surrounding calamities. While we were at this
hard labour I once fell into a pond we had made amongst some loose
ice, and was very near being drowned; but providentially some people
were near who gave me immediate assistance, and thereby I escaped
drowning. Our deplorable condition, which kept up the constant
apprehension of our perishing in the ice, brought me gradually to
think of eternity in such a manner as I never had done before. I had
the fears of death hourly upon me, and shuddered at the thoughts of
meeting the grim king of terrors in the _natural_ state I then was in,
and was exceedingly doubtful of a happy eternity if I should die in
it. I had no hopes of my life being prolonged for any time; for we
saw that our existence could not be long on the ice after leaving the
ships, which were now out of sight, and some miles from the boats. Our
appearance now became truly lamentable; pale dejection seized every
countenance; many, who had been before blasphemers, in this our
distress began to call on the good God of heaven for his help; and in
the time of our utter need he heard us, and against hope or human
probability delivered us! It was the eleventh day of the ships being
thus fastened, and the fourth of our drawing the boats in this manner,
that the wind changed to the E.N.E. The weather immediately became
mild, and the ice broke towards the sea, which was to the S.W. of us.
Many of us on this got on board again, and with all our might we hove
the ships into every open water we could find, and made all the sail
on them in our power; and now, having a prospect of success, we made
signals for the boats and the remainder of the people. This seemed to
us like a reprieve from death; and happy was the man who could first
get on board of any ship, or the first boat he could meet. We then
proceeded in this manner till we got into the open water again, which
we accomplished in about thirty hours, to our infinite joy and
gladness of heart. As soon as we were out of danger we came to anchor
and refitted; and on the 19th of August we sailed from this
uninhabited extremity of the world, where the inhospitable climate
affords neither food nor shelter, and not a tree or shrub of any kind
grows amongst its barren rocks; but all is one desolate and expanded
waste of ice, which even the constant beams of the sun for six months
in the year cannot penetrate or dissolve. The sun now being on the
decline the days shortened as we sailed to the southward; and, on the
28th, in latitude 73, it was dark by ten o'clock at night. September
the 10th, in latitude 58-59, we met a very severe gale of wind and
high seas, and shipped a great deal of water in the space of ten
hours. This made us work exceedingly hard at all our pumps a whole
day; and one sea, which struck the ship with more force than any thing
I ever met with of the kind before, laid her under water for some
time, so that we thought she would have gone down. Two boats were
washed from the booms, and the long-boat from the chucks: all other
moveable things on the deck were also washed away, among which were
many curious things of different kinds which we had brought from
Greenland; and we were obliged, in order to lighten the ship, to toss
some of our guns overboard. We saw a ship, at the same time, in very
great distress, and her masts were gone; but we were unable to assist
her. We now lost sight of the Carcass till the 26th, when we saw land
about Orfordness, off which place she joined us. From thence we sailed
for London, and on the 30th came up to Deptford. And thus ended our
Arctic voyage, to the no small joy of all on board, after having been
absent four months; in which time, at the imminent hazard of our
lives, we explored nearly as far towards the Pole as 81 degrees north,
and 20 degrees east longitude; being much farther, by all accounts,
than any navigator had ever ventured before; in which we fully proved
the impracticability of finding a passage that way to India.
CHAP. X.
_The author leaves Doctor Irving and engages on board a
Turkey ship--Account of a black man's being kidnapped on
board and sent to the West Indies, and the author's
fruitless endeavours to procure his freedom--Some account of
the manner of the author's conversion to the faith of Jesus
Christ._
Our voyage to the North Pole being ended, I returned to London with
Doctor Irving, with whom I continued for some time, during which I
began seriously to reflect on the dangers I had escaped, particularly
those of my last voyage, which made a lasting impression on my mind,
and, by the grace of God, proved afterwards a mercy to me; it caused
me to reflect deeply on my eternal state, and to seek the Lord with
full purpose of heart ere it was too late. I rejoiced greatly; and
heartily thanked the Lord for directing me to London, where I was
determined to work out my own salvation, and in so doing procure a
title to heaven, being the result of a mind blended by ignorance and
sin.
In process of time I left my master, Doctor Irving, the purifier of
waters, and lodged in Coventry-court, Haymarket, where I was
continually oppressed and much concerned about the salvation of my
soul, and was determined (in my own strength) to be a first-rate
Christian. I used every means for this purpose; and, not being able to
find any person amongst my acquaintance that agreed with me in point
of religion, or, in scripture language, 'that would shew me any good;'
I was much dejected, and knew not where to seek relief; however, I
first frequented the neighbouring churches, St. James's, and others,
two or three times a day, for many weeks: still I came away
dissatisfied; something was wanting that I could not obtain, and I
really found more heartfelt relief in reading my bible at home than in
attending the church; and, being resolved to be saved, I pursued other
methods still. First I went among the quakers, where the word of God
was neither read or preached, so that I remained as much in the dark
as ever. I then searched into the Roman catholic principles, but was
not in the least satisfied. At length I had recourse to the Jews,
which availed me nothing, for the fear of eternity daily harassed my
mind, and I knew not where to seek shelter from the wrath to come.
However this was my conclusion, at all events, to read the four
evangelists, and whatever sect or party I found adhering thereto such
I would join. Thus I went on heavily without any guide to direct me
the way that leadeth to eternal life. I asked different people
questions about the manner of going to heaven, and was told different
ways. Here I was much staggered, and could not find any at that time
more righteous than myself, or indeed so much inclined to devotion. I
thought we should not all be saved (this is agreeable to the holy
scriptures), nor would all be damned. I found none among the circle of
my acquaintance that kept wholly the ten commandments. So righteous
was I in my own eyes, that I was convinced I excelled many of them in
that point, by keeping eight out of ten; and finding those who in
general termed themselves Christians not so honest or so good in their
morals as the Turks, I really thought the Turks were in a safer way of
salvation than my neighbours: so that between hopes and fears I went
on, and the chief comforts I enjoyed were in the musical French horn,
which I then practised, and also dressing of hair. Such was my
situation some months, experiencing the dishonesty of many people
here. I determined at last to set out for Turkey, and there to end my
days. It was now early in the spring 1774. I sought for a master, and
found a captain John Hughes, commander of a ship called Anglicania,
fitting out in the river Thames, and bound to Smyrna in Turkey. I
shipped myself with him as a steward; at the same time I recommended
to him a very clever black man, John Annis, as a cook. This man was on
board the ship near two months doing his duty: he had formerly lived
many years with Mr. William Kirkpatrick, a gentleman of the island of
St. Kitts, from whom he parted by consent, though he afterwards tried
many schemes to inveigle the poor man. He had applied to many captains
who traded to St. Kitts to trepan him; and when all their attempts and
schemes of kidnapping proved abortive, Mr. Kirkpatrick came to our
ship at Union Stairs on Easter Monday, April the fourth, with two
wherry boats and six men, having learned that the man was on board;
and tied, and forcibly took him away from the ship, in the presence
of the crew and the chief mate, who had detained him after he had
notice to come away. I believe that this was a combined piece of
business: but, at any rate, it certainly reflected great disgrace on
the mate and captain also, who, although they had desired the
oppressed man to stay on board, yet he did not in the least assist to
recover him, or pay me a farthing of his wages, which was about five
pounds. I proved the only friend he had, who attempted to regain him
his liberty if possible, having known the want of liberty myself. I
sent as soon as I could to Gravesend, and got knowledge of the ship in
which he was; but unluckily she had sailed the first tide after he was
put on board. My intention was then immediately to apprehend Mr.
Kirkpatrick, who was about setting off for Scotland; and, having
obtained a _habeas corpus_ for him, and got a tipstaff to go with me
to St. Paul's church-yard, where he lived, he, suspecting something of
this kind, set a watch to look out. My being known to them occasioned
me to use the following deception: I whitened my face, that they might
not know me, and this had its desired effect. He did not go out of his
house that night, and next morning I contrived a well plotted
stratagem notwithstanding he had a gentleman in his house to personate
him. My direction to the tipstaff, who got admittance into the house,
was to conduct him to a judge, according to the writ. When he came
there, his plea was, that he had not the body in custody, on which he
was admitted to bail. I proceeded immediately to that philanthropist,
Granville Sharp, Esq. who received me with the utmost kindness, and
gave me every instruction that was needful on the occasion. I left him
in full hope that I should gain the unhappy man his liberty, with the
warmest sense of gratitude towards Mr. Sharp for his kindness; but,
alas! my attorney proved unfaithful; he took my money, lost me many
months employ, and did not do the least good in the cause: and when
the poor man arrived at St. Kitts, he was, according to custom, staked
to the ground with four pins through a cord, two on his wrists, and
two on his ancles, was cut and flogged most unmercifully, and
afterwards loaded cruelly with irons about his neck. I had two very
moving letters from him, while he was in this situation; and also was
told of it by some very respectable families now in London, who saw
him in St. Kitts, in the same state in which he remained till kind
death released him out of the hands of his tyrants. During this
disagreeable business I was under strong convictions of sin, and
thought that my state was worse than any man's; my mind was
unaccountably disturbed; I often wished for death, though at the same
time convinced I was altogether unprepared for that awful summons.
Suffering much by villains in the late cause, and being much concerned
about the state of my soul, these things (but particularly the latter)
brought me very low; so that I became a burden to myself, and viewed
all things around me as emptiness and vanity, which could give no
satisfaction to a troubled conscience. I was again determined to go to
Turkey, and resolved, at that time, never more to return to England. I
engaged as steward on board a Turkeyman (the Wester Hall, Capt.
Linna); but was prevented by means of my late captain, Mr. Hughes, and
others. All this appeared to be against me, and the only comfort I
then experienced was, in reading the holy scriptures, where I saw that
'there is no new thing under the sun,' Eccles. i. 9; and what was
appointed for me I must submit to. Thus I continued to travel in much
heaviness, and frequently murmured against the Almighty, particularly
in his providential dealings; and, awful to think! I began to
blaspheme, and wished often to be any thing but a human being. In
these severe conflicts the Lord answered me by awful 'visions of the
night, when deep sleep falleth upon men, in slumberings upon the bed,'
Job xxxiii. 15. He was pleased, in much mercy, to give me to see, and
in some measure to understand, the great and awful scene of the
judgment-day, that 'no unclean person, no unholy thing, can enter into
the kingdom of God,' Eph. v. 5. I would then, if it had been possible,
have changed my nature with the meanest worm on the earth; and was
ready to say to the mountains and rocks 'fall on me,' Rev. vi. 16; but
all in vain. I then requested the divine Creator that he would grant
me a small space of time to repent of my follies and vile iniquities,
which I felt were grievous. The Lord, in his manifold mercies, was
pleased to grant my request, and being yet in a state of time, the
sense of God's mercies was so great on my mind when I awoke, that my
strength entirely failed me for many minutes, and I was exceedingly
weak. This was the first spiritual mercy I ever was sensible of, and
being on praying ground, as soon as I recovered a little strength, and
got out of bed and dressed myself, I invoked Heaven from my inmost
soul, and fervently begged that God would never again permit me to
blaspheme his most holy name. The Lord, who is long-suffering, and
full of compassion to such poor rebels as we are, condescended to hear
and answer. I felt that I was altogether unholy, and saw clearly what
a bad use I had made of the faculties I was endowed with; they were
given me to glorify God with; I thought, therefore, I had better want
them here, and enter into life eternal, than abuse them and be cast
into hell fire. I prayed to be directed, if there were any holier than
those with whom I was acquainted, that the Lord would point them out
to me. I appealed to the Searcher of hearts, whether I did not wish to
love him more, and serve him better. Notwithstanding all this, the
reader may easily discern, if he is a believer, that I was still in
nature's darkness. At length I hated the house in which I lodged,
because God's most holy name was blasphemed in it; then I saw the word
of God verified, viz. 'Before they call, I will answer; and while they
are yet speaking, I will hear.'
I had a great desire to read the bible the whole day at home; but not
having a convenient place for retirement, I left the house in the day,
rather than stay amongst the wicked ones; and that day as I was
walking, it pleased God to direct me to a house where there was an old
sea-faring man, who experienced much of the love of God shed abroad in
his heart. He began to discourse with me; and, as I desired to love
the Lord, his conversation rejoiced me greatly; and indeed I had never
heard before the love of Christ to believers set forth in such a
manner, and in so clear a point of view. Here I had more questions to
put to the man than his time would permit him to answer; and in that
memorable hour there came in a dissenting minister; he joined our
discourse, and asked me some few questions; among others, where I
heard the gospel preached. I knew not what he meant by hearing the
gospel; I told him I had read the gospel: and he asked where I went to
church, or whether I went at all or not. To which I replied, 'I
attended St. James's, St. Martin's, and St. Ann's, Soho;'--'So,' said
he, 'you are a churchman.' I answered, I was. He then invited me to a
love-feast at his chapel that evening. I accepted the offer, and
thanked him; and soon after he went away, I had some further discourse
with the old Christian, added to some profitable reading, which made
me exceedingly happy. When I left him he reminded me of coming to the
feast; I assured him I would be there. Thus we parted, and I weighed
over the heavenly conversation that had passed between these two men,
which cheered my then heavy and drooping spirit more than any thing I
had met with for many months. However, I thought the time long in
going to my supposed banquet. I also wished much for the company of
these friendly men; their company pleased me much; and I thought the
gentlemen very kind, in asking me, a stranger, to a feast; but how
singular did it appear to me, to have it in a chapel! When the
wished-for hour came I went, and happily the old man was there, who
kindly seated me, as he belonged to the place. I was much astonished
to see the place filled with people, and no signs of eating and
drinking. There were many ministers in the company. At last they began
by giving out hymns, and between the singing the minister engaged in
prayer; in short, I knew not what to make of this sight, having never
seen any thing of the kind in my life before now. Some of the guests
began to speak their experience, agreeable to what I read in the
Scriptures; much was said by every speaker of the providence of God,
and his unspeakable mercies, to each of them. This I knew in a great
measure, and could most heartily join them. But when they spoke of a
future state, they seemed to be altogether certain of their calling
and election of God; and that no one could ever separate them from the
love of Christ, or pluck them out of his hands. This filled me with
utter consternation, intermingled with admiration. I was so amazed as
not to know what to think of the company; my heart was attracted and
my affections were enlarged. I wished to be as happy as them, and was
persuaded in my mind that they were different from the world 'that
lieth in wickedness,' 1 John v. 19. Their language and singing, &c.
did well harmonize; I was entirely overcome, and wished to live and
die thus. Lastly, some persons in the place produced some neat baskets
full of buns, which they distributed about; and each person
communicated with his neighbour, and sipped water out of different
mugs, which they handed about to all who were present. This kind of
Christian fellowship I had never seen, nor ever thought of seeing on
earth; it fully reminded me of what I had read in the holy scriptures,
of the primitive Christians, who loved each other and broke bread. In
partaking of it, even from house to house, this entertainment (which
lasted about four hours) ended in singing and prayer. It was the first
soul feast I ever was present at. This last twenty-four hours produced
me things, spiritual and temporal, sleeping and waking, judgment and
mercy, that I could not but admire the goodness of God, in directing
the blind, blasphemous sinner in the path that he knew not of, even
among the just; and instead of judgment he has shewed mercy, and will
hear and answer the prayers and supplications of every returning
prodigal:
O! to grace how great a debtor
Daily I'm constrain'd to be!
After this I was resolved to win Heaven if possible; and if I perished
I thought it should be at the feet of Jesus, in praying to him for
salvation. After having been an eye-witness to some of the happiness
which attended those who feared God, I knew not how, with any
propriety, to return to my lodgings, where the name of God was
continually profaned, at which I felt the greatest horror. I paused in
my mind for some time, not knowing what to do; whether to hire a bed
elsewhere, or go home again. At last, fearing an evil report might
arise, I went home, with a farewell to card-playing and vain jesting,
&c. I saw that time was very short, eternity long, and very near, and
I viewed those persons alone blessed who were found ready at midnight
call, or when the Judge of all, both quick and dead, cometh.