particular joy: I perceive myself nothing; but through the blood of
Jesus, I claim salvation. Elizabeth is increasingly weak, but enjoys
great peace. She was unable to turn herself; but after an ineffectual
attempt, upheld by the power of God, she exclaimed, 'Praise the Lord!
I _cannot_ praise Him enough: though He slay me, yet will I trust
in Him.' This evening I overheard, 'Precious God,' 'Salvation,' 'My
Jesus.' Then turning her head, she said, 'Since I have been afflicted,
the enemy has tried many ways to take away my shield; but the Lord
has stood by me, and I believe I shall come off more than
conqueror.'--About two o'clock we thought she was dying; she stretched
out her hand to each of us, and drew us near, to kiss her; then
shouted as loud as she could, 'Glory be to God! I am going to glory;
glory be to God!' About five she revived again. One said, 'Jesus is
near,' she responded, 'Glory, He is, He is'--I was with her from two
in the morning; she was restless, and in much pain, until about nine
o'clock; when she changed for death. Conscious that she was dying, she
desired to be placed in a chair, and shouted with all the strength she
had, indeed louder than we could have supposed her capable of, 'Glory
be to God!' 'Glory be to God!' many times, until her strength was
exhausted. She breathed till eleven, and then, without moving hand or
foot; without a sigh or a groan; her happy spirit took its flight to
the paradise of God. Thus died Elizabeth Stables, in the thirty-fifth
year of her age. It had been for some time my prayer, that the Lord,
if it pleased Him, would grant her an easy passage, and permit her to
depart in the day-time. In this He has mercifully heard me. Before
the crisis arrived, I felt a degree of timidity; and therefore, when I
rose from my bed, I bowed myself before the Lord, before entering
the room. He graciously dispersed my fears, and filled my heart with
peace. To me the scene of dissolution was exceedingly solemn. May my
last end be like hers!--I followed the remains of dear Elizabeth to
the grave, to which we consigned them 'in sure and certain hope of a
joyful resurrection.' Surely this hope has preserved me from yielding
to useless tears, as on former occasions;--for I loved her. Henceforth
may it be my constant study to be found ready, that, like her, I
may triumph in the prospect of dissolution.--Visited two or three
afflicted persons in the village, perhaps for the last time: may I
find them all again in the day of eternity. Took tea with Mrs. B. and
her daughter, whom I would gladly have persuaded to accept the offers
of mercy; but the grace of God alone can affect the heart.--After an
absence of six weeks I returned home: the day was fine. Truly mercy
follows me. Through courtesy to a friend, I wounded my own soul by
yielding to converse on subjects, which no way tended to promote
fervency of spirit. I felt humbled in consequence, and as if I could
not lift my heart to God; but before the close of the service, which
I afterwards attended, the Lord graciously softened my hardness
down--melting me into tears.--I close the year fully bent upon giving
myself to God. While I write, I enjoy peace. O Thou that seest me,
Thyself unseen, direct my pen, and guide me to Thyself. Here on my
knees I surrender myself to Thee; if Thou discoverest any guile in
me, reveal it to me, and make me wholly thine. Surrounded with Thy
presence, O fill me with Thy love! From henceforth, may I dwell in
the secret place of the most High, and abide under the shadow of the
Almighty.
If fleeting moments silently report
Each action, motive, and unuttered thought;
May this fair page no added witness bring
Of time mis-used, as musing thought may spring.
No, rather let my muse abstracted turn;
Forget to muse, and of my Saviour learn
That rare humility, so highly prized
By Him, who sees the heart all undisguised.
From Him my subject come, my thought proceed;
To Him my motive tend, my action lead:
In all, I henceforth think, or speak, or do,
The glory of my God be kept in view.
"1829.--I am permitted to enter another year, but who can tell the
event? Suffice it; I can now say, I am Thine, and am resolved to form
my life, whether long or short, by Thy precepts. This morning an alarm
is spread through the city--'The Minster on fire.' 'Shall there be
evil in the city, and the Lord hath not done it?' O Thou, who canst
alone educe good out of seeming evil send, forth Thy light and
truth.--Visited Mrs. F----s, we had a blessed interview: Heaven shed
its rays around us. Here I proved that in Jesus difference of age is
lost: all ages and sects can in Him unite.--The greater part of this
day has been spent in reading, praying, visiting the sick, and the
public means of grace: all of which have been sources of profit to
my soul. How great are my privileges! I think I am stripped of all
dependance upon them; but fear I do not make that improvement of them
which I ought. Thankful I am for the decision I feel; but stand in
doubt of myself, should a storm of persecution arise, whether I should
be able to endure the fiery test. Clouds gather round about; the signs
of the times portend a season of trial; my heart, while I write,
says, 'I will be Thine:' but Thou knowest how unstable I am,--Three
strangers came to the class; two of them were much affected. I want to
feel more deeply for souls, and to do every thing with a single eye. I
have several times been to visit an afflicted neighbour, who has often
been warned to put away his sins; but is yet unsaved. Never did I see
friends more solicitous for the conversion of a relative; his poor
afflicted wife prays, and entreats most earnestly, with tears: it has
to me been an affecting scene. O may her prayers be answered!--Another
week gone; a week of mercy, warning, blessing, inward exercise,
and peace. On Tuesday night, I witnessed the deathbed scene of a
neighbour: dying is hard work. At the funeral on Friday these lines
were much impressed upon my mind:--
'So live, that, when thou tak'st thy last long sleep.
Dying, may'st smile, when all around thee weep:'
I quoted them amongst the friends of the deceased, and added such
words as were given me at the time. There was a deep silence: what was
the impression I leave; I only discharged a duty, and could only reach
the ear, but do Thou, whose instrument I am, effectually touch each
heart, and save them all. Penelope informs me, that the poor man I
visited when in Sinnington, has begun to attend the house of God. May
his good desires end in sound conversion.--I visited poor Fanny; with
tears of joy starting in her eyes, she said, 'Glory be to God, I feel
my soul so happy, that I would fly if it were possible.' Truly in this
home of poverty, the power of divine grace is exemplified. I have also
seen neighbour G. for the fourth time; it is delightful to visit her:
she appears fully sensible of her state, and has received a little
comfort; but not the clear witness of her acceptance.--In consequence
of sickness, I laid a little longer than usual; but my meditations
were sweet. For a time my mind was borne as on eagles' wings, far
above the things of earth; I seemed to breathe the atmosphere of
heaven, and to commune with Jesus in heavenly places: this
baptism delightfully sustained my mind through the trials of the
day.--Probably this is the last Sabbath of my residence in York. Some
think we are missing the path of providence: I do not know; but this I
can say, I am willing to stay, or willing to go, and earnestly desire,
that the will of God may be done in me and by me, whether in public or
retirement.
In silence, lo! I sit
To hear Thy gentle voice;
And lowly at Thy feet,
Share Mary's nappy choice:
Speak as Thou wilt, but speak within,
And make my nature wholly clean.
This day of hallowed joy,
The day the Lord arose,
Thy glorious power employ,
And vanquish all my foes;
To me the power of faith impart,
And reign triumphant in my heart.
Another week has elapsed, and we are still in York. O Lord, direct our
path, and guide us by Thy counsel. I would leave all in Thy hands: I
think I do.
XII.
COUNTRY LIFE.
"COME, MY BELOVED, LET US GO OUT INTO THE FIELD; LET US
LODGE IN THE VILLAGES."--Cant. vii. 11.
In the spring of 1829, Mr. Lyth retired to a country residence, which
he had built upon a small estate, between three and four miles from
the city. The propriety of this step, as it seemed to involve the
sacrifice of many religious advantages, was by some intimate friends
regarded with grave suspicion; and it may fairly be doubted, how far
a Christian man, with the view of enjoying the fruits of his industry,
has a right to withdraw himself and his family from a sphere of
usefulness, and privilege, to one of comparative retirement. Can he be
equally useful? Will his family enjoy equal privileges? If not let him
pause, for he is under a higher law than that of self-gratification,
or worldly policy: besides, his very object may be frustrated; it may
turn out, that the change from an active to an idle life, may
bring disquiet instead of repose. But in the present instance, the
disadvantage was overcome by the force of christian principle. Mrs.
Lyth did not relinquish her exertions in the city, while a new sphere
of usefulness opened itself in the village, near which they came to
reside. Twice a week, as often as health permitted, she visited the
city to meet her classes; sometimes walking the whole distance there
and back. The day was generally spent in seeing her absent members,
visiting the sick, or availing herself of public, or social means
of edification. The effect of these exertions upon her own delicate
frame, was painful; and, combined with other causes, occasioned,
during her four years' residence at Eastfield House, frequent and
severe attacks of sickness. But we resume her own notes.
"I came to Eastfield House, which is now to be my home during my
pilgrimage on earth. Thank God, I feel I am but a stranger and a
sojourner. A variety of circumstances have engaged my attention,
and interrupted my quiet; but when shut in from the world, to hold
converse with God, I have tasted superior pleasure.--I went early to
York, and spent the day in seeing the sick, and other members of my
classes; visiting the school, attending my band, and meeting my class.
Most of these engagements were profitable to me, and I hope to others.
I went out with the conviction that I was the Lord's labourer.--My
niece, Hannah, is apparently near eternity. She tells me she is happy,
and I cannot doubt it; for last evening while praying with her,
my faith acquired such strength, and I was so filled with love and
confidence, that when I rose from my knees, I could not help saying,
'The Lord has blessed you.' She answered, 'Yes:' but whether at
that moment, or earlier in the day, I cannot tell. The work is the
Lord's.--After an affliction, of some months, and a fortnight's
confinement to bed, Hannah has left us. For two days she was
insensible, but the last she was remarkably tranquil, with a very
pleasing expression of countenance.--My greatest joy is in communion
with the Lord and His saints: this has been a high, day; I have been
unusually assisted in speaking to the Lord's people; and many appeared
to feel the power of God. At the close of the meeting, Mrs. B. called
upon me, and we went to Mrs. Vevers', where we united in prayer; and
from thence to Miss H.'s, where we held our little band-meeting, Mrs.
E. was much affected, but not able to lay hold of the great blessing:
O for more faith.--The quarterly fast was observed in Haxby for the
first time: I found it good to unite with them.--During the last week
we have been favoured with the company of Mr. Mortimer, returned from
the Shetland Islands. He retains the same Christian simplicity, and
I feel it a privilege to entertain such a man under our roof. I was
benefitted among the dear people; but my body was much wearied when I
returned home, and the folio wing day I was very unwell: yet my mind
was peaceful. At the entreaty of my husband, I remain at home to-day;
being only very feeble. O shut me not out from Thy presence; but feed
me with heavenly manna.--I hail the returning Sabbath, Glory, glory
be to God, the sacred fire is kindled in my heart. Well might the
Psalmist say, 'I would rather be a door-keeper in the house of my God,
than dwell in the tents of wickedness' The Lord does carry on His work
in my soul. Love destroys fear. God is my portion, and in Him will
I trust. The week has been mixed with trial and blessing. Monday:
Penelope left us, after a visit of ten days. Tuesday: Felt it good
while Mr. Crowther admonished us to look to Jesus. Wednesday: Our
servant left us: I had power to pray for her after she was gone.
Thursday: The Lord was with us at our little meeting. Friday: I
spoke unadvisedly with my tongue, which occasioned pain of mind; but
applying to Jesus, I found access. O the condescension of the Saviour!
The prayer-meeting was a blessed season. Saturday: A day of toil, but
the Lord was with me: yet I want a constant mind, that I may every
moment hold converse with my God. 'Keep thyself pure' was the
admonition of the Spirit one morning this week. May I ever remember
it."
[The following was the dying complaint of the "Miscellany," a little
family periodical, which had a brief, but happy existence.]
Confident, on airy wing,
My vanity soared high;
Like the nightingale I'd sing,
And with the eagle fly.
Soon my sad mistake I found;
I warbling notes had none,
And scarcely rose above the ground,
Before my plumes were gone.
Flatt'ry whispered soft and low,
Of wisdom, fame, and lore;
Woe is me! neglected now,
The pleasant dream is o'er.
Pity, then, my humble state,
And if you can bestow
Tears upon my hapless fate;
Pray let them freely flow.
"I have around me some who exercise my patience, and therefore need
the wisdom of the serpent, and the meekness of the dove, that I may
be preserved from offending. Last Sabbath, I was tempted to mistrust
Providence, as I had not seen a rainbow since the rains commenced; but
the following evening--accompanying my husband to York in a very heavy
shower--on our left, we saw the broadest and most beautiful bow I ever
beheld. I could not help thinking it infinite condescension in the
great I AM thus to remove my scruples.--I walked to York alone: but
surrounded by proofs of divine wisdom and power, my solitude was
sweet; my thoughts meandered like the river, that swept at my side.
Reverting to past scenes and circumstances, I wrote with my pencil:
If, through scenes of tribulation,
Lies the pathway to the skies;
Let me yield with resignation,
Sure, Thy ways are always wise.
"A friend has made application for my Sunday-class. In this matter, I
do not see my way clear; however, as I was requested to seek another
place for it--the old one being required for another purpose--I began
to think it was an intimation that I ought to resign, and therefore
mentioned the subject to my members, and left it. But calling on a
friend, as I returned home, she said, 'she was requested to tell me,
that Mr. H. would be glad if I would meet the class at his house' So
this difficulty is removed, and there the matter rests. O Lord,
direct me by Thy counsel.--Providence seems to thwart my purposes: yet
everything appears either to point, urge, allure, or draw me to the
skies. I find the beneficial effect of these painful dispensations;
but nature struggles still, and the cry of my heart is, make me wholly
Thine. Two persons, whom I have visited this week, are no more. One,
I doubt not, is gone to Abraham's bosom; the other I must leave,
and profit by the admonition to prepare to meet my God. I have been
accused of doing as I would not be done by; but my conscience bears
we witness to the contrary. Help me, O God, ever to act as in Thy
sight.--After the toils of Saturday, I was privileged with being at
the band-meeting; but when I reached Miss B's, I fainted, through
weakness and fatigue. Praise the Lord, O my soul! Is not every
stroke of Thy rod a proof of love, admonishing me that I am but a
tenant-at-will, and may be removed at a moment's notice? Lord, make
me fully ready.--I found it good in our little village prayer-meeting,
and remained with my husband at the Sabbath-school committee. He
engaged to assist; and I was constrained to offer my services once
a month to converse with the female scholars, which were readily
accepted.--In York, I had the opportunity of visiting several
afflicted persons: one poor man was much afflicted: it was a blessed
day. I have been to Wigginton to visit the afflicted Miss B., to
whom I tried to show the necessity of a change of heart, and the
sufficiency of the remedy, with the danger of delay."
Come, heavenly Spirit, fill my breast,
With holy, ardent love inflame;
Breathe in my soul the perfect rest
Revealed in Jesus' lovely name.
Blest centre! where I find repose;
My succour, when in deep distress;
The only refuge from my foes;
Jesus, Thy feeblest follower bless.
Thy constant presence, Thine alone
Can satisfy my longing soul;
Supply the good for which I groan;
Thy presence, Lord, shall make me whole.
"Just as the year closes, I take my pen. How solemn! unseen by all but
God! How shall I proceed? I am a sinner; but thou art a Saviour--_my_
Saviour! O praise God! unworthy as I am, unprofitable as I have been,
Thy peace fills my heart: I am surrounded with God. Glory! glory!
glory! a worthless worm! dust and ashes! a potsherd of the earth! yet
Jesus died for me. O, live in me; fit me for Thy service, that I may
be willing to do or to suffer Thy will. Let me be a whole sacrifice.
Jesus is near; He is precious; He has my heart: let the union
subsist for ever. Never let me leave Thee more; but through all the
vicissitudes of life, keep me; and if I am entering upon my last year,
let it be the best of all. Let the odours of the celestial world waft
upon me, and invigorate my soul.
"1830.--Midnight. The past year has been one of mingled trial,
affliction, and mercy; wisely blended to bring me nearer to God. I
think the end has been answered: I feel looser from the world, and my
will is more fully subdued. This is the Lord's doing: blessed be His
name! I rose early, and shut myself up in my closet, and there the
Lord gloriously revealed himself: it was a blessed day, especially,
in walking to the city; and among the dear people.--Another piece
of encouragement: our servant, who has been brought under serious
impressions since she came to us, was last Tuesday enabled to believe
unto salvation. O may I walk as God's vicegerent here; that my
husband, mother, children, and servants, may all be led to give
themselves more fully to Thee.--Our servant man cried aloud for mercy
in the chapel. How and where, shall I begin to praise Thee for Thy
goodness to my family? I am constrained to acknowledge, that many
things, which appeared to be against me, are now working for good.
Every bitter has its sweet, and every affliction its blessing;
wisely compounded, to bring me more fully to God. Last night we had
a prayer-meeting in our kitchen: the spirit of prayer was poured out
upon us. One soul obtained peace: and another remained upon his knees
upwards of three hours, but did not break through; yet is determined
not to rest without the pardoning mercy of God: a third was seeking
purity of heart.--Visited S.H., fast sinking in decline. When asked
the state of her mind, she said, 'Christ is mine, and I am His.'
Blessed assurance! I spoke freely with her mother, whom I found
unacquainted with true religion. Two persons came to seek the Lord at
the prayer-meeting held in our kitchen--one obtained salvation: truly
the Lord is among us: a larger number attended than usual.--We had a
numerously attended prayer-meeting, in which three bore testimony to
the saving power of Christ; they praised God with a glad heart, and
a loud voice: may they become pillars in God's temple.--Many sweet
moments have I enjoyed, while engaged in domestic affairs. This
morning, I rose to the early prayer-meeting; all nature seemed to
congratulate me, and the feathered choristers were singing their matin
song of praise. My walk to York afterwards, seemed too short, while
musing on the love of Jesus.--In the still hour of night I have had
some blessed seasons; but my walk is not equal: I want to live a
moment at a time, and all for God. Another of my members has passed
into eternity, to join the church above. Just before she expired, she
exclaimed, 'What do I see? Glory.'--I am not going to meet my class
to-day, my mother is so unwell; yet I feel a struggle as to the path
of duty: but surely in this case duty and affection are one. Lord, I
aim to please Thee; O help me for Thy name's sake."
SITTING BY MY MOTHER.
O would'st Thou, Lord, descend,
My mother's heart to cheer;
This unbelief to rend,
And dissipate her fear:
Thou glorious Sun, unveil the skies;
With healing in Thy wings arise.
Thy promise, Lord, I hold,
_'The evening shall be light,'_--
The cloud its pinions fold,
And vanish out of sight:
O Jesus, come, Thy face display.
And eventide is turned to day.
"Proclamation of William the 4th. In company with some friends,
I climbed to the top of Clifford's Tower, in hope of seeing the
procession; but after waiting more than an hour, I went away
disappointed, and grieved at the loss of my time. Let me learn from
this, always to do what I believe to be most needful; for my mind was
dissipated, and I failed to recover in the class what I had enjoyed
in the early hours of the day. O how needful to keep the path of duty,
and retire from the multitude.--The Rev. Joseph Agar has dies happily,
at Portsmouth: of brain fever. An unusual feeling oppressed my mind
on the afternoon of his departure; why, I know not.--The Rev. E. Batty
took tea with us, and suggested a method of usefulness, which has for
some time been the subject of my thoughts; but to choose, or refuse
are Thine: 'Thy will be done.'--I walked to Acomb to visit a friend,
and on the way asked myself, why I should go; and not being able to
answer for myself, put the case into the hands of God, beseeching him
to make my way plain before me; to bless me, and make me a blessing.
I met with a kind reception--slept well--and rose about six with a
desire to give myself to the Lord. In the afternoon I accompanied Mrs.
R. to her class: it was the second time of their meeting. Mrs. R. read
the rules; and afterwards, I endeavoured to speak a little to
them. When addressing the third, she burst into tears through the
disquietude of her soul. We knelt down to pray; and while Mrs. R. was
pleading, the woman began to praise God for what He had done for her
soul, and said she had been unhappy for years--but that now the Lord
had given her peace. We continued on our knees, and in a little while
another person, who through unwatchfulness had gone astray, professed
that the Lord had restored her soul. The third (for there were
but three) went away, resolved not to rest until she had found the
Lord.--We went to invite the people to the prayer-meeting in the
evening, and then visited the churchyard. There, the solemn silence,
dwelling among sepulchral stones and the falling leaves, moved my soul
to the consideration of my own mortality. May I so live, that I may
hear the welcome words, 'Well done.' I feel deeply on account of my
own nothingness. The prayer-meeting to-night is proposed because I
am here. I am humbled at the thought. What am I? a poor worm. Oh!
wouldest Thou use a thing of nought? prepare the people, prepare me,
and pour out Thy holy spirit. I was surprised at the number of people
gathered together on so short a notice. The presence of the Lord
overshadowed us, and the woman, who was seeking mercy at the class,
was filled with peace and joy through believing. I felt humbled under
the sense of my own unprofitableness.--I have found retirement very
blessed: the Lord poured into my soul a heavenly tranquility. I hope
that my visit here will be beneficial to me; and that I shall learn
some lessons from the kind family, under whose roof I stay: there is
such a sweet submission to each other's will, and such a disposition
to prefer others to themselves, as is amiable, and worthy of
imitation.--My inward aspiration is, make me all glorious within, that
from this pure well-spring, all my thoughts and actions may flow. I
enjoy the peace of God, and for some time past, (to the glory of God
I speak it,) I have had constant intercourse with heaven. My will is
more fully subdued, and I have increasing power to take up my cross;
but the duties of life press upon me, and I am in danger of being
overwhelmed with care. I thank Thee, O my heavenly Father, for this
discovery; and humbly but confidently, ask Thy protection from my
foe.--A day of unusual nearness to God:--in the Lord's house; in
visiting the poor; reading the rules of society; and social prayer:
although dissatisfied with my performances, I feel I have done what
I ought.--My spiritual strength has been increased by more frequently
engaging in secret prayer. By appointment, I have daily met two
friends at the throne of grace, to intercede on behalf of our
neighbours: this has been made a blessing to my own soul.--For the
first time, my whole family was assembled at Eastfield; but who can
tell the emotions of my mind, as I gazed on one and another? I thought
unutterable things; but wisely is the future hidden from our view.
O _my_ God, be Thou _their_ God. I feel the solemnity of the closing
year: its toils and cares are fled for ever; only its comforts will be
repeated, if I hold fast the blessed hope of everlasting life."
NEAR MIDNIGHT.
The year ebbs apace,
Its sorrows are gone!
Like one in a race,
Its course it hath, run:
Its events, once important, now all disappear,
And time wafts us on to another new year.
Then let us begin,
To aim at the prize;
Leave earth, self, and sin,
For our home in the skies:
Expecting the Bridegroom will shortly appear,
Let as watch his arrival--the coming new year.
XIII.
THE REDEMPTION OF THE PROMISE.
"BE NOT AFRAID, ONLY BELIEVE."--Mark v. 36.