It was upon a Sabbath-day-morning, that they prepared for their travel.
This morning I asked my master whether he would sell me to my husband.
He answered me "Nux," which did much rejoice my spirit. My mistress,
before we went, was gone to the burial of a papoose, and returning, she
found me sitting and reading in my Bible; she snatched it hastily out of
my hand, and threw it out of doors. I ran out and catched it up, and put
it into my pocket, and never let her see it afterward. Then they packed
up their things to be gone, and gave me my load. I complained it was
too heavy, whereupon she gave me a slap in the face, and bade me go; I
lifted up my heart to God, hoping the redemption was not far off; and
the rather because their insolency grew worse and worse.
But the thoughts of my going homeward (for so we bent our course) much
cheered my spirit, and made my burden seem light, and almost nothing
at all. But (to my amazement and great perplexity) the scale was soon
turned; for when we had gone a little way, on a sudden my mistress gives
out; she would go no further, but turn back again, and said I must go
back again with her, and she called her sannup, and would have had him
gone back also, but he would not, but said he would go on, and come
to us again in three days. My spirit was, upon this, I confess, very
impatient, and almost outrageous. I thought I could as well have died as
went back; I cannot declare the trouble that I was in about it; but yet
back again I must go. As soon as I had the opportunity, I took my Bible
to read, and that quieting Scripture came to my hand, "Be still, and
know that I am God" (Psalm 46.10). Which stilled my spirit for the
present. But a sore time of trial, I concluded, I had to go through,
my master being gone, who seemed to me the best friend that I had of an
Indian, both in cold and hunger, and quickly so it proved. Down I sat,
with my heart as full as it could hold, and yet so hungry that I could
not sit neither; but going out to see what I could find, and walking
among the trees, I found six acorns, and two chestnuts, which were
some refreshment to me. Towards night I gathered some sticks for my own
comfort, that I might not lie a-cold; but when we came to lie down they
bade me to go out, and lie somewhere else, for they had company (they
said) come in more than their own. I told them, I could not tell where
to go, they bade me go look; I told them, if I went to another wigwam
they would be angry, and send me home again. Then one of the company
drew his sword, and told me he would run me through if I did not go
presently. Then was I fain to stoop to this rude fellow, and to go
out in the night, I knew not whither. Mine eyes have seen that fellow
afterwards walking up and down Boston, under the appearance of a Friend
Indian, and several others of the like cut. I went to one wigwam, and
they told me they had no room. Then I went to another, and they said the
same; at last an old Indian bade me to come to him, and his squaw gave
me some ground nuts; she gave me also something to lay under my head,
and a good fire we had; and through the good providence of God, I had a
comfortable lodging that night. In the morning, another Indian bade me
come at night, and he would give me six ground nuts, which I did. We
were at this place and time about two miles from [the] Connecticut
river. We went in the morning to gather ground nuts, to the river, and
went back again that night. I went with a good load at my back (for they
when they went, though but a little way, would carry all their trumpery
with them). I told them the skin was off my back, but I had no other
comforting answer from them than this: that it would be no matter if my
head were off too.