_Sister:_ "Hubby received an anonymous letter this morning informing him
of something I did before we were married."
_Brother:_ "Well, the best thing you can do is to confess."
_Sister:_ "I know it, but he won't let me read the letter and I don't
know what to confess."
* * *
"I'd like to see the man who could persuade me to promise to love,
honour and obey him," said Miss Wellontheway.
"I don't blame you," remarked the newly-made bride.
* * *
"Huh! Yuh talks 'bout sassiety like yuh knows so much 'bout it. Niggah,
I bet dey don' eben have evenin' dresses whah yuh come frum."
"Zat so? Dey's doin' well to have evenin's whah yuh come frum."
* * *
_Second-story Worker:_ "Hullo, Bill, I see you got a new overcoat. What
did it cost you?"
_Burglar:_ "Six months. I never wears cheap clothes!"
* * *
The sweet young thing was being shown through the boiler shop.
"What's that thing?" she asked, pointing with a dainty parasol.
"That's an engine boiler," said the guide.
"And why do they boil engines?" she inquired.
"To make the engine tender," replied the resourceful guide.
* * *
He was a Scot, with the usual characteristics of his race. Wishing to
know his fate, he telegraphed a proposal of marriage to the girl of his
choice. After waiting all day at the telegraph office he received the
affirmative answer late at night.
"Well, if I were you," said the operator, "I'd think twice before I
married the girl who kept me waiting for an answer so long."
"Na, Na?" said the Scot. "The girl for me is the girl who waits for the
night rates."
* * *