The pilots here changed places. _When did they sleep?_

Wood taken in, the _Caravan_ again took her place in the middle of the

stream, paddling on as usual.

Day at length dawned. The brag-party broke up and settlements were

being made, during which operations the Captain's bragging propensities

were exercised in cracking up the speed of his boat, which, by his

reckoning, must have made at least sixty miles, and _would_ have made

many more if he could have procured good wood. It appears the two

passengers, in their first lesson, had incidentally lost one hundred

and twenty dollars. The Captain, as he rose to see about taking in some

_good_ wood, which he felt sure of obtaining now that he had got above

the level country, winked at his opponent, the pilot, with whom he had

been on very bad terms during the progress of the game, and said, in an

undertone, "Forty apiece for you and I and James" [the other pilot] "is

not bad for one night."

I had risen and went out with the Captain, to enjoy a view of the

bluffs. There was just fog enough to prevent the vision taking in more

than sixty yards--so I was disappointed in _my_ expectation. We were

nearing the shore for the purpose of looking for wood, the banks being

invisible from the middle of the river.

"There it is!" exclaimed the Captain; "stop her!" Ding--ding--ding!

went the big bell, and the Captain hailed:

"Hallo! the woodyard!"

"Hallo yourself!" answered a squeaking female voice, which came from a

woman, with a petticoat over her shoulders in place of a shawl.

"What's the price of wood?"

"I think you ought to know the price by this time," answered the old

lady in the petticoat; "it's three and a qua-a-rter! and now you know

it."

"Three and the d----l!" broke in the Captain. "What, have you raised on

_your_ wood, too? I'll give you _three_, and not a cent more."

"Well," replied the petticoat, "here comes the old man--_he'll_ talk to

you."

And, sure enough, out crept from the cottage the veritable faded hat,

copperas-colored pants, yellow countenance and two-weeks' beard we had

seen the night before, and the same voice we had heard regulating the

price of cotton-wood squeaked out the following sentence, accompanied

by the same leer of the same yellow countenance:

"Why, darn it all, Capting, there is but three or four cords left,

and _since it's you_, I don't care if I _do_ let you have it for

_three_--_as you're a good customer_!"

After a quick glance at the landmarks around, the Captain bolted, and

turned in to take some rest.

The fact became apparent--the reader will probably have discovered

it some time since--that _we had been wooding all night at the same

woodyard_!

Little Masterpieces of American Wit and Humor, Volume II · 第 11 / 86 题